Days ofMeaninglessness

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fuf'lJPhaptawan Suwannakudt

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Where does art go when the return ofmea ning lessness no end?reaches

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This conversation took place in Sydney when Clare Veal* visited Phaptawan in her studio in August.

The conversation continued via email about various topics concerning the work, the background of

the series and Phaptawan's practice.

r uir.l...rrJa'r relates to a specific series of events and experiences from your trip to Thailand last year.

Can you recount the events that led to the development of this work?

I have been visiting Thaitand atmost every year since my mother had her first knee operation in 2006.

Her heatth went into decline and she has been gradua[y losing her memory. As I tried to keep

physicatty in touch with her presence I found my work relating more and more to the situation in

ThaiLand. Last year I was granted access to work in the facilities of Printmaking Department at

Sitpakorn University in Nakorn Pathom. I offered to give a lecture and student workshop in return.

At the same time I was tooking for channets to work in coltaboration with Thai and Austratian artists.

That project aimed to give more exposure to tatented young Thai women artists. During seven weeks

I trave[ted to Mahasarakham, Chiangmai, Maehongsorn and towards the end of the trip, to the south

of Thail.and. I based mysel.f in Bangkok in order to visit my mum and be with her during her periodical

hospitat check-ups.

Before I arrived, peopl.e were atready protesting and expressing dissatisfaction with the weakening

government. Soon after I got there, politicians from the opposition party took charge of the protests.

Their strategic ptan involved creating diversions around the city, which they announced on daily

basis. The protests were [oud and noisy with whisttes btowing and rock bands blaring sound on

stages set up on the main streets of centraI Bangkok. The ra[[y organisers then changed focus and

began to disrupt government offices and cut power [ines. The goats of their activities were to block

atl normaI government functions and make it impossibte to hoLd the upcoming generaI election for a

new prime minister and cabinet.

I went to Mahasarakham in late December where I met a scholar whose studies and work retated

to keeping Tai-noi [anguage alive. We had a very sad conversation about the leveI of drug abuse

among locaI youth. He had found that the probtem related directty to their [ack of setf-esteem.Many peopte in provincial Thail.and feel excluded from Thai society in general because for decades

the Bangkok-based centraI government has referred to them as stupid based entirely on the provinces

where they were born, their ethnicity and their [oca[ language. The current protestors atleged the

votes of peopte in the countryside were bought by the government they were trying to overthrowand therefore their votes shouldn't be considered as equal to those cast by the supposed[y bettereducated people from Bangkok. They insisted on this, even though the government stil[ in power

in December 2013 had repeatedty won every election hel.d during the previous decade.

I left Mahasarakham at night and arrived Bangkok the next morning to go for a watk along the

Thonburi side of the Chaopraya River. This wal.king excursion was planned for me by an expat whohas resided in Thaitand for over twenty years. Despite the anxiety about the unrest in Bangkok I

realty looked forward to this trip since it inctuded the area I tived in during my chitdhood. I invited

my sister and also a Thai friend who has lived for a long time in Sydney and happened to be visiting

Bangkok. I knew this Thai friend from the same neighbourhood in Sydney onty to discover much

later that we'd grown up and spent our childhoods within watking distance of each other in the same

area of Bangkok. During the watk, I took many photos of my chitdhood ptaces.

Not [ong after, the protesters announced their intention to stari their Shutdown Bangkok campaign on

the day my husband and chitdren were due to arrive from Sydney. The protests had already caused

casualties and the [eve[ of anxiety intensified as the scheduled etection date approached. We booked a

hotel in the same viltage in Thonburi where I had tived as a child. My Sitpakorn lecture was cancelted

and I did not feeI comfortab[e taking the children across the river to the Bangkok side to visit theirgrandma. I brought my husband and our chitdren atong the same Chaopraya River wal.k I'd taken

eartier wlth my expat friend, sister and Thai friend and took more photos. When I came back to

Sydney days later I went through these photos and setected some as the basis for painting thisseries of five triptychs. The titte of this series is Days of lrndtessl Meaninglessness .

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The title of the work, r ujrr...rrJar is a play on words that gives the audience an insight into theexperiences that led to the work's inception. Did the title come before or after you had developedthe concept for the work? How does the title relate to your experience of that day and the processof developing this work?

It could be simultaneous, due to the fact that this painting series had to happen and came out of thestate of despair and hetptessness into which I found myse[f sinking deeper to the point of seeingno ending or way out. I recaL[ed the chaos of the [oud mass protests occurring onty two minutesaway by ferry across the river on the day I took these photos. Yei in the pictures there was no one.The protest was moving forward to a dead-end resotution. I was witnessing the repercussions ofrepetitive patterns experienced in Thai society for more than hal.f a century. Visiting ptaces of mychildhood memories I saw the chitd Phaptawan who grew up in a society where saying negative orcriticaI words is a punishable offence. The words'N0' Imai-Iu'J as in "mai tham-1urir" {l witt not do

thisl, "mai pai-Iuld" [l don't want to go)are associated with aggression. The undesirable'No'[mai]as in "mai aao-Iu'ror"Il don't take that], "mai tong kan-1u'n'oJnts" {t don't want itJ are associatedwith rudeness. Howeverthe more accepiable'N0'IpLao-tda'r) as in "pLao phut-Ldarqo" (t did notsay thatJ, "ptao tham-rdarrir" It did not do that), "pl.ao due-rda'rC''o" tf am not being resistant), "pLao

songsay-tdaraJa-u" It am not being curious), "ptaoson-Ldarau" (l'm not being naughty) are aL[ used

by children as ways to avoid getting into trouble. When I looked through the photographs, I sawan immature chitd trapped by not being abte to say no. The negative 'pLao-rUar' and 'less' for thisseries is not a cliched pun but the state of mind into which I got myself caught.

Your work has often dealt with the expansion, adaptation and reinterpretation of the mural paintingform in accordance with the different material and imaginative conditions in which you find yourself.For example, your early works in Australia demonstrate transformations in your understanding ofmural painting, occurring in conjunction with your new experience of working alone, rather thanas the head of a team, and in a context divorced from the Thai Buddhist temple. What are the newconditions that you face now and how do the techniques involved in this work demonstrate a newtransformation in your practice of mural painting?

Murat painting is a direct and immediate environment that I did not choose but was born into. lt washe language and visual grammar I grew up with. After my father passed away in the middLe of amuraI painting project for the Bangkok Peninsuta Inow Four SeasonsJ Hotet, I took over his ptace

and led his group in compteting the project. That eventuated in my decision to make art my futurecareer, even though l'd never received any formal training in art school. Although it was not instructiveas part of the practice, I found mysetf [istening to Locals tiving in the communities around the temp[eand began collecting their stories as soon as I got my first contract for a tempte muraL project.When I arrived in Sydney working in soLitude without the team and with no tempLe walts to paint,I immediatel.y began searching for ways to relate to the new society in which I was to make myfuture home. Perhaps I created an imaginary muraI work using the same methodol.ogy and process

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I'd used for painting actuaI mural,s. The output of work natura[[y evolved as seriaI sequences in a

continuous process of muraI making. The difference was that I had to be resourcefuI and work from

Locatly avail.able materia[s and surfaces. ln my [ater work, the maieriats and media became secondary

to the context. My most recent works have involved found objects, community participation and

frequently inctude Layers of content inctuding Thai text and visuaI references. For the work in this

exhibition, however, I have come back to painting because it is based on photographic images I took

during my visit to Thail.and in December 2013 and January 2014. The process and techniques I chose

for this series informed the narratives.

1ne of the most interesting aspects of this work is your use of photographs and a more impressionistic

technique. In many ways this choice seems as if there is a focus on trying to completely capture the

immediacy of your experiences. What were the qualities you looked for when selecting photographs

for this work and how do they relate to your feelings about your trip around Thonburi?

Yes, I think that is how the narrative of this series goes. However I do not control how and whether the

paintings may or may not look impressionistic. Perhaps that was because they were based on my

own photographic materiaLs. Speaking of which, in this series etements of rawness and unfinished

patterns appear to dominate the styte and technique. This series 'Days of IEndtess] Meaningtessness'

is the first time I drew and painted from what turned up through the [ens on specific dates without

even noticing the content. The way ltook pictures may be viewed as candid. That is to say, I looked

through the camera [ens in the same way in which I observe things with fresh eyes. I am not even

conscious of a viewfinder between me and the content, or that the picture is timited by what can

be captured within a frame. lt's an oLd habit of seeing and very primitive. I think the beauty of this

series reties on what is not in the content in relation to the context of what happened on the day.

I think the idea of what is not in the frame as being crucial to this series. As you mentioned, on this day

you were trying not to think about the wider events in Bangkok, and you took the photographs without

thinking very much about their content. Yet there is such a sense of sadness in the work that beguiles

something else going on in your mind when you took these images, at least on a subconscious level.

Do you think that your subconscious feelings revealed themselves to you through the process of

photographing and making this work?

I am not sure how things work on the LeveI of my subconscious. I can onty say that I was sad and

distressed the who[e time I was in Thail.and during that trip. I also did not set myse[f apart from the

objects or buiLdings in front of me when I took the pictures. Far from it, I fe[t reaI and somehow

attached to them. Just Like I feLt when I went through choosing the prints and during the painting

process. Perhaps there are two levets at pl.ay: my chitdhood memories and the increasingty sad

situation on the streets of Bangkok. However most pictures I took do not appear to be aimed at

anything specific. That retates to how I used to work on drafts forthe tempte muraI projects.

I woutd draw on drafting paper with the narrative I had in mind by locating figures, shapes and forms

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proportionaI to the scale of the available watl space and its surroundings. I drew everything in the

draft from memories of what I had seen or noticed. That coutd inctude certain patterns, figures,

buitding, colour tonalities or even something I had seen in books. The draft then became the master

ptan for my team to fotlow untiI the comptetion of that particutar project. After I got my f irst camera,

which was not so [ong ago, I continued to use it to coltect images the way I had once observed

things my eyes were drawn to. Sometimes I would take pictures as references for the context of

certain project narratives I was deating with at the time, [ike houses and plants in Sydney. However

that was not the case with the photos in this selection.

When we met, we spoke about Vipassana meditation and the practice of awareness. How has your

process developed through your understanding of practicing awareness?

I spent part of my chitdhood tiving in a temple where the daily routines are surrounded by chanting

and praying. I swept dried leaves around the Ubosot, which was a meditation practiced by novices

and Buddhist monks. I continue to use rhythmic patterns in my studio practice as we[[ as my dai[y

househotd tasks. During my teenage years I also attended weekly Vipassana meditations with my

Dad given by a senior monk at Wat Paknam Pasicharoen.

I suffered badty when my Dad passed away. I had tittte time to grieve before I was immediately

put into his position as leader of a painting team. After a year of bad insomnia, I found comfort in a

smatt book about mindfutness with text by Ajaarn Tien. He wrote about being aware of one's mind,

and how it can contain poltuted emotions that may [ead to destructive motives and harmful actions.

I started practicing awareness to observe what my mind does and I observed that the anger in me

disappeared. lt was the moment of wisdom that one can attain at different stages of Vipassana.

It produced in me something I def ine as an out of the body state. That is to say, the moment when

you are abte to catch what the mind does at the same speed it is happening. You separate your

body from your mind in order to exptore what it does. I am not spirituaL, but I be[ieve this practice

of awareness keeps me in touch with reatity. That may be my source of inspiration and imagination.

It probabty inftuences the context of my work and the way in which I observe human beings with

compassion. This appeared in my work Nariphon series ItSSOJ which reLates to the incidents of

parents who so[d their children into the sex trade. This was happening next to the temple project

where I worked in Payao. I wanted to change the situation but found this vicious cycte happened

after generations. lnstead I created the work Nariphon to trigger questions about old beliefs in the

traditions. The process of routine work in my studio is meditative and yet it also keeps my inquisitive

mind alive.

The work itself is largely devoid of figures, and features abandoned spaces and empty doorways,

were these recurring elements a conscious choice in the work?

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The days I took photos when I had no specific project in mind, I thought I aimed the shots as tourists

do when taking photos for souvenirs. But when I went through the photos after returning back to

Sydney I realized they revealed a significantty holtowed emptiness. They were reatly depressing to

look ai, yet I saw the beauty in them too. There was a sense of yietding, of submission, which was

very revealing and powerfut. I couldn't take my eyes off them. I decided to arrange and crop the

images and make that into a series of triptych paintings to tetl stories.

You later made a video, May 2014, once you were back in Sydney. How does the video relate to the

work as a whole?

This was the time few months after I came back to Sydney. I had started the studio work on the titte

and the painting series were in progress. I woke up one early morning and went to the back garden

next to the studio as I normatty start my day. I noticed the stow movement of a grey-patterned

sithouette on the wa[t, which Looked mysterious and immersive. I went into the studio to get the

video camera and recorded the movement, which had been creaied by Light on the wa[t. A jet plane

ftew past over the house and shook the objects through which the sunl.ight had created the movement.

It created a startLed wave of movement in front of the video-camera. I decided to pan the camera

sideway to observe the surroundings of this sil.houette and found the btack and white picture on

the subject of Durga, the stayer of the 0x-demon. The video was recorded in May and it was days

before Thai[and dectared martiaI law. The content of my daity [ife I recorded just fitted in with the

current situation in Thai[and which had been occupying my mental space. This shadow ptay was

accidentaI but the work I was dealing with in the studio was reat.

0n May 21't I posted the stitL image of the video on my sociaI media networks, one of which read'Days of Endless...Meaninglessness' work tribute to my Dad who went in a ralty for Democracy in

Thaitand '1957.

What happened was an apparent repetition of the history of Thaitand on the foltowing day in May of

the year 2014.

Given the inextricable relationship between this work and your own personaL experiences, how do

you think this will be communicated to the work's audience? How does this relate to your previous

works which have dealt with issues of translation and communication between individuals and

across communities?

I believe every artwork contains information which represents its main subject. I also think that the

works of any one artist are subjective and remain personat, no matter to what [eve[ or to what extent

the subject concerns the community. I was less confident and fel.t awkward using the Language of

Buddhist muraI painting to communicate to the world outside the traditiona[ [Thai] context. However

each of my works continues to demand the need for conversation. Some examples of works in which

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I used Thai text to inform my personal experiences inctude: Three Worlds series [2009) and Catching

the Moment...Each Step is the Past IZOtOJwfricfr were inc[uded in the exhibition Locution-[re)-Locationat 100 Tonson Gatlery IZOttJ, Not for Sure [1Bth Biennale of Sydney 2012j and the Bhava Series [TheState of Being, 2013).These groups of works adhered with translation and communication to thecontext which expressed the need to communicate. I made the text tegibte onty to me and withmore complicated contextua[ layers, not to ignore the barriers but rather to point them out. The

work I have delivered during three decades communicates through its route and its journey. For

Edge of Elsewhere in 2011 at Campbelltown Arts Centre I showed three works produced sevenyears apart. Looking at the works when they were instatted together, I saw patterns beyond theretative information. They evotved through time as eyewitnesses to the lived experience of one [ife.

It is true that this current series was unplanned and is indeed not in [ine with what I've produced

recentty. However when you notice this abrupt pattern, I consider this work has already done itspart to detiver the message.

Clare > You mentioned to me that this work was unplanned. Why did you feel this was an important work tomake at this time and what are some of the challenges you have faced in producing this work?

Phaptawan > I received the news that lwon a grant to conduct my project forAsiaLinkArts Residency Programat Ne'-Na Contemporary Art Space for late 2012*. This happened when I was already in Thaitandbut before I visited the places I have mentioned. Anticipating the residency I had pLans in mind forother work for my next project. lt was onty when I went back to Sydney and looked at the pictures

that I changed the ptans. These works are based from photos I took on a specific date when Thai

society was confronted with unresotved confticts and increasing viotence. Without getting poLiticaL,

it is not overty criticaI to say that when there was an abuse of setf-serving patriotic ideology tojustify an action, it may have done damage to the unity and the sense of freedom which Thais have

valued and deserved. This applies anywhere and no society is immune to exploitation when abuse

of power takes place. 0ne frequentty reads this in political speeches from Europe and America,let atone e[sewhere in South East Asia. lt imbued me with a sense of obtigation to make this work.There was no chattenge in the making of it. To me, the work only presents unanswered questions.

Most people I spoke to don't know the sotution; I fett no less trapped than them. When I witnessedwhat occupied the mentaI space of Thai society on the days I took the photos, I could onLy focus my

energy on protecting my loved ones who were vutnerabte in this precarious situation. I generated

that in the process of making this work, hence the urgency of the work.

Clare > The video is another way in which the process of creating the work is revealed, at what stage in yourprocess did the idea to create the video came up, and what did it reveal to you about your process?

Phaptawan > There were times when lthought of my work as moving images based on the narratives. However

I have never attempted buitding up one. Perhaps I feel the technique and process of constructingvideo work is far removed from the craft-based medium I am more familiar with. However in the

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work May 2014 I did not choose the medium but rather the medium chose me. Did video have

to be the medium which answered to this work?-l did not plan. I would say this work makes mepay more attention to moving images. Now I think more seriously about using this as one of myinstruments.

What is the role of your artistic practice in your attempts to come to terms with and process eventsin Thailand? How do you work through your feelings through your process?

I can on[y retate to the process of work in the same way in which the Vipassana path leads toawareness. When I processed the work there was this sense of yietding and submission to theemptiness I saw in front of me. The work by itself in a way performs the function of a vessel hatcontains the forms of emotions I experienced. The society I witnessed is futL of hatred, discrimi-nation, and ignorance, which creates fear, distrust and blame. lt produced the notion of 'us' and'them' and we are all. affected by it. I hope one sees the series 'Days of [fndtessJ Meaninglessness'as a proposition to look back at the form of these emotions.

I TransLation: Harmish Muszid I

I Ctare veat I

Ctare Vea[ is a PhD candidate with the Department of Art History and Film Studies at the University of Sydney

where she is compteting her thesis on the relationship between photography and Thai identity from 1950 to2010. She has pubtished in Trans Asia Photography Review, Modern Art Asia, Silpakorn JournaI of Fine arts,

and the Journal of Aesthetics and Culture. ln addition to working as a freelance curator she is atso currenttythe sub-editor for Asian art for the Routtedge Encyclopaedia of Modernism. Between 2012 and 2013 she wasa researcher in residence at the Thai Art Archives, Bangkok and compteted fietdwork in Thailand with fundingfrom the Asia lnstitute, Metbourne and the Royal. Thai Embassy.

Phaptawan [ikes to thank her [ong-time friend Jennifer Gampett, for taking her on the Thonburi watkingexcursion that became the inspiration for this series and atso for her help in editing the comments.