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IF ONLY MIRRORS COULD TELL STORIES

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IF MIRRORS COULD TELL STORIES

Stina Strange Thue Tobiasen

   

     

IF MIRRORS COULD TELL STORIES

An exploration of young dance students´ experiences of a contemporary

dance class constructed in the hope of fostering psychological well-being.

Stina Strange Thue Tobiasen

The Danish National School of Performing Arts

This dissertation is submitted in partial fulfilment of the requirement for the

Post-Graduate Education in Dance Partnership, 120 ECTS

Submission date: 28th of May 2014

Words: 10.380

   

Declaration

A dissertation submitted in part fulfilment of the requirements for the post graduate education in Dance Partnership (120ects)

The Danish National School of Performing Arts 2012-2014

______________________________________

I certify that all the material in this dissertation, which is not my own work, has been identified and that no material is included for which a degree has previously been

conferred on me.

   

ABSTRACT

The aim of this study was to explore how young dance students in dance educations

experience a contemporary dance class created in the hope of fostering psychological

well-being. Free writings and video diaries from the app. 20 students in a one-year

pre-vocational contemporary dance education in Copenhagen were collected. The

free writings were used as the primary data while film clips from the video diaries are

being linked to in sections of the dissertation as well as being shown in the DVD,

which also includes the documentation “If Mirrors Could Tell Stories – a

documentation”. The documentation works as a supplementation of understanding of

the practice-research and can be viewed either before or after having read the thesis.

The free writings were analysed using a narrative approach (Degerbøl, 2013) and they

are presented as a narrative about 3 fictive persons.

The study reveals that a combination of technique, creativity and autonomy nurtures

essential elements towards a feeling of psychological well-being and positive emotions

for the majority of the students. However the main finding of the study is that

creativity and autonomy did not necessarily foster a feeling of mental well-being for all

students and the study thereby contradicts some findings from other studies in dance

science. Questions about creativity and autonomy are being raised and further

discussed.

   

ACKNOWLEDGEMENT

I would like to thank my supervisor Mia Keinänen for support throughout the whole

process. Without her constant availability and help this study would not have

developed in the way it did.

Thank you Sheila de Val for the never-ending encouragement and for always being at

our disposal throughout the two years of education. Without your hopes for our

futures the years would not have been the same

Thanks to Lotte Sigh and Morten Innstrand for letting me do my practice-research at

Copenhagen Contemporary Dance School. I am deeply grateful to the students who

participated in my workshop, and without whom this study would not have existed.

Thanks to Dave Black for the incredible live music during the workshops. Also thanks

to the rest of the MAD education, Caleb Fawcett, Chris Walker, Alex Opazo, and

Diego Morgan for the interdisciplinary projects, beautiful soundscapes and memories

during the education.

I am indebted to my brother, Rasmus Strange Thue for his visual, artistic eye,

practical help, and for always daring to question and discuss. Thanks to my parents for

their understanding and social support in needed times.

Last but not least thank you Viola, Stinna, Mette, and Hanna for support and

memorable times throughout the past two years. Thanks for being so wonderful,

diverse, and eye-opening persons. Without you my horizon would not have been as

wide as it is now. Thanks for the dance.

   

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CONTENTS

1. INTRODUCTION 2

2. A PERSONAL NOTION OF PSYCHOLOGICAL WELL-BEING 3

3. LITERATURE REVIEW 4

3.1 PSYCHOLOGICAL HEALTH 4 3.2 THE BODY IN FLOW – AS A METHOD TO OPTIMAL EXPERIENCES 5 3.2.1 FLOW 5 3.3 OPENNESS AND PSYCHOLOGICAL HEALTH 6 3.4 RESEARCH IN DANCE AND WELL-BEING 7

4. METHODOLOGY – BEING-IN-THE-WORLD 8

5. A MULTI-FACETED PRACTICE-RESEARCH 8

5.1 BEING A PRACTITIONER-RESEARCHER 8 5.2 QUALITATIVE METHODS 9 5.3 STUDENTS´ FELT EXPERIENCES 10 5.4 LOOKING THE NARRATIVE WAY 10 5.5 EXTRACTING NARRATIVES 11 5.6 MY ARTISTIC VOICE 12 5.7 STUDY DESIGN 12

6. LIMITATIONS AND CONSIDERATIONS 13

7. IF MIRRORS COULD TELL STORIES 14

8. ANALYSIS 17

8.1 PRESENTATION OF THE PERSONS 17 8.2 ENJOYING DANCING 18 8.3 AUTONOMOUS SPACE 20 8.4 ROOM FOR CREATIVITY 22 8.5 ENERGIZING LIVE MUSIC 24 8.6 OPENNESS 25

9. QUESTIONING CREATIVITY AND AUTONOMY 26

10. CONCLUSION 27

11. BIBLIOGRAPHY 29

12. APPENDICES 31

APPENDIX 1 – ETHICAL CONSENT FORM 31 APPENDIX 2 – NOTES FOR THE DESIGN OF THE CLASS 32 APPENDIX 3 – LESSON PLAN 33 APPENDIX 4 – FIELD JOURNAL MONDAY 36 APPENDIX 5 – FIELD JOURNAL WEDNESDAY 40 APPENDIX 6 – FIELD JOURNAL FRIDAY 45 APPENDIX 7 – SAMPLE OF FREE WRITINGS 47 APPENDIX 8 – TRINITY LABAN WEBPAGE 55  

   

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1. INTRODUCTION  

Imagine. Try to imagine “a place” of genuine well-being.

You have probably experienced this exact feeling of mental well-being at some point in your life. You

feel balanced, well and possibly even happiness. Perhaps you are already visualising a specific moment,

place and time where you have sensed this feeling.

Now close your eyes and imagine this “place” of genuine well-being for a moment… Pay attention to

how you feel, right now in this moment.

“Well-being is valuable in its own right – all dancers deserve to feel good about themselves and their

dancing.” (Redding et al., 2011, p. 50)

It is an interesting notion the concept of well-being. Through my years of experience

as a dancer, dance artist and teacher in and out of educational institutions I have

experienced true well-being through dancing. But I have also experienced undeniable

feelings of psychological ill-being (Law, 2005 in: Watson et al. 2012, p. 17) due to

multiple hours of technical work in the dance studio, working to optimize my

technique, movement quality and the way my body looked. I strived for “better” all

the time and even then “better” was not good enough. It became a matter of

perfectionism and I hit a psychological wall during my 3-years vocational dance

education. I never felt good enough and always felt I could improve. Having a bad

pirouette day could literally ruin my day. I began to suffer from low self-esteem

starting to develop into a depression over years. Not until later in life when accepting

other ways of dancing than a muscular, technical way e.g. somatic based work and

creative processes I started to accept that technical and bodily perfectionism is not the

only path to well-being though it can be part of it. Today my feeling of well-being

derives from a balance of physical activity, my own freedom to choose creative

projects, and my social network.

I still love being physical. I love dancing, running, doing yoga, I love working hard,

sweating and dive into muscular, technical details. Contrary I also know from

experience that at some point it can disturb my psyche and I will start not to feel good

about myself. The more my mind knows e.g. about technical details the more it also

becomes aware of what I am not capable of doing. As juxtaposition to this working

very somatically, inwardly or creatively over a long period of time will eventually start

   

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to bore me and a feeling of being bodily unchallenged will occur and still sometimes

do.

Lately and during my practice-research leading to this case study I have talked to

dancers and dance teachers about their feelings of psychological well-being during

their daily training. We can only agree that the notion is complex and well-being

deriving from dance is a subjective state of mind and differs for each individual.

Due to my own experiences and knowing that a lot of dancers trouble with

psychological well-being because of the psychological and physical pressure we are

often under during our career I find that we in the world of dance should pay more

attention to it. Dancing can, even though being an art form, learn from research in

psychology and sports psychology while the similarities between professional dancers

and athletes are evident; the body being the instrument (Nordin and Cumming 2006

in: Klockare et al., 2011)

Can you still sense your genuine feeling of well-being?

2. A PERSONAL NOTION OF PSYCHOLOGICAL WELL-BEING

In many articles on well-being in dance and sports it is challenging to find a

conceptualization of the notion but I will utilize the following definition in this study.

“In general terms we can talk about well-being as lives going well physically, psychologically, and

socially. Well-being is a combination of feeling good, being able to pursue intrinsic goals and values,

and functioning effectively” (Ryan et al. 2008 ; Huppert 2009 in: Ommundsen, Løndal, and

Loland, 2014).

My personal notion of psychological well-being derives from a subjective view-point

and the definition above. Well-being is a multidimensional and balanced state of mind

consisting of a psychological, physical and social element (Sport, Children and

Wellbeing, 2014); the social element to give a sense of belonging and personal, related

support in life (Scottish Government 2009 cited in Whitelaw et al. 2010 in: Sport,

   

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Children and Well-being, 2014), the physical element being part of my profession

where I practice my technique and “my tool”, which is my body as well as keeping it

healthy, and the psychological dimension being a matter of controlling my

consciousness, not rejecting any emotions, and having a high sense of self-esteem. All

dimensions influence each other and one without the other does not function. That

counts for my life inside and outside the dance studio. Adding to that the physical

dimension of dancing has increased my feeling of psychological well-being (Connolly

et al., 2011) lately being balanced with autonomy and creativity (Watson et al., 2012)

though in slightly smaller expanses.

A review of the literature referred to throughout the dissertation is now following.

3. LITERATURE REVIEW

Theorists who look into psychological well-being in different ways are here being

presented. To maintain the focus on dance other studies relating to dance and well-

being are part of my theoretical basis.

3.1 Psychological Health

With my wish to use the knowledge of psychology to shine light on the area of

psychological well-being of the young dancers in my artistic practice-research I turn to

Ed Diener and Robert Biswas-Diener, both leading professional psychologists with

their concepts of psychological wealth and subjective well-being. (Diener & Biswas-

Diener, 2008).

“Psychological wealth is your true total net worth, and includes your attitudes toward life, social

support, spiritual development, material resources, health, and the activities in which you engage.”

(Diener & Biswas-Diener, 2008, p. 3)

Psychological wealth depends on happiness and life satisfaction broader than

monetary wealth. It is a feeling of well-being and a high quality of life.

   

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Beneficial when looking at the stories of the dance students, Diener and Biswas-Diener

claim that psychological wealthy people are involved in meaningful and important

activities and have found activities in which they can use their strengths.

They describe how happiness and subjective well-being are important in the process

towards true psychological wealth. Through our own personal approach to the world

we experience the quality of life and happiness.

“Subjective well-being encompasses people´s life satisfaction and their evaluation of important domains

of life such as work, health, and relationships. It includes emotions such as joy and engagement and the

relatively rare experiences of unpleasant emotions such as anger, sadness and fear.” (Diener &

Biswas-Diener, 2008, p. 4)

Positive emotions are not only simple joy but also an abundance of feelings like love,

commitment and gratitude. Therefore happiness is a process not a place to reach and

it requires an approach to experience life with a positive attitude.

3.2 The Body in Flow – as a method to optimal experiences

“It is a very joyful and giving experiences because the body and mind are united in one concentrated,

optimal, physical and mental movement. We can call it happiness, enjoyment, play, the zone, a

“swing”, a “kick”, that it swings, that we are high, that we are flying – or that we are simply in

flow.” (Translation from: Knoop 2004 in: Knoop&Lyhne et al., 2005, p. 125)

3.2.1 Flow

I present the theory of flow (Csikszentmihalyi, 1989) due to experiences of flow during

my practice-research. Also because I find it an interesting component in order to

experience psychological well-being for young dancers. I differ between “flow” and

“well-being” because one can experience well-being without flow. Well-being can be

experienced as a balancing of psychological, physical and social dimensions like biking

with a good friend in the sunshine but to reach a state of flow it requires one´s skills,

body, or mind to be stretched to its fullest potential.

   

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Flow is complex and a fair review of the notion would take up more space than

available here. The attempt is to give an overview of the most important aspects from

the section about the body in flow (Csikszentmihalyi, 1989, p. 110-134) seen in the

light of my practice-research.

Flow is when we are so involved in an activity that nothing else matters especially

found in so-called “experts” like musicians, artists, and doctors doing things they

prefer. Optimal experiences arise when the body or mind is being used to its full

capacity and flow can appear when our mental energy is being invested in realistic

goals while our competencies are equally capable of reaching those goals.

Csikszentmihalyi writes that dance is an important source to reach a state of flow but

more important is it that the body does not create flow by itself. The mind has to be

incorporated. Enjoyment takes place in the mind meaning that flow can never be a

pure physical thing. Muscles and mind are demanded (Csikszentmihalyi, 1989).

     

3.3 Openness and Psychological Health

“… I consider the problem of psychological health to be so pressing that any suggestions, any bits of

data, however moot are endowed with great heuristic value.” (Maslow, 1989, p. 125)

The human developmental psychologist Abraham H. Maslow is known for his

“hierarchy of needs” and the book “Motivation and Psychology”. He started a

philosophical revolution with methodologies for a human science seen from a positive

perspective rather than from a negative one. He argues that e.g. well-being has been

studies less than the disorganizing effects of emotions (Maslow, 1989).

I will pay attention to his description of self-actualizing people and their ability to

openness and love in relation to the openness experienced by some of the students in

the workshop. Openness in healthy individuals is described as a dropping of defences

and an honesty of allowing faults, weaknesses, physical, and psychological

shortcomings to be seen. Even though Maslow describes openness in relation to love

and relationships it is easily transferred to this practice-research where the relationship

between students and teacher plays a big role (Maslow, 1989).

Additionally he brings up the notion of psychological health and loosely describes a

criterion in a selection of healthy people for a study. He writes that they use their

   

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capacities to their fullest and have the basic needs as safety, belongingness, love,

respect, self-respect, and the cognitive needs for knowledge (Maslow, 1989).

Observations of self-actualizing people showed them to be accepting themselves, being

problem centred instead of ego centred, autonomous, creative, and able to appreciate

repeatedly.

3.4 Research in Dance and Well-being

“Dance science is a fast growing area of research. It aims to investigate ways of understanding dance

practice through various methodological approaches and explores the impacts of dance on areas of health

and well-being” (Quote http://www.trinitylaban.ac.uk/study/dance/dance-science,

appendix 8).

Throughout the analysis and discussion, I am using qualitative and quantitative

articles being published in the area of dance science. They are especially looking into

how autonomy and creativity is directly related to well-being.

I will refer to the suggestions of balancing creativity and skills in order to help dancers

fulfil their careers (Watson et al., 2012), the findings of there being “parallels in teaching

for creativity and promoting well-being” and the possibly benefitting effects of a task-

involving and autonomous climate (Watson et al., 2012, p. 17). Also stated in other

studies is it that creative dance shows to have further potential to improve physical

fitness and psychological well-being (Quinn et al., 2007, p. 9)

Looking at the above studies and my own experiences of well-being and ill-being

through dancing I believe that dancing is supposed to make us feel good but I am also

wondering whether it is possible to nurture a feeling of psychological well-being

through dancing. Therefore I am asking:

How do dance students describe their experience in a dance class designed by me with the hope of

fostering psychological well-being?

   

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4. METHODOLOGY – being-in-the-world

“I am not the result or the intertwining of multiple causalities that determine my body or my “psyche”.

I cannot think of myself as part of the world, like the simple object of biology, psychology, and

sociology. I cannot enclose myself within the universe of science. Everything that I know about the

world, even through science, I know from a perspective that is my own or from an experience of the

world without which scientific symbols would be meaningless. I am the source.” (Merleau-Ponty,

1945, p. 8)

I place myself methodologically in a holistic place where I as dancer and dance

educator see the body and mind non-separable. I work from a phenomenological

approach of the world inspired by the body phenomenologist Maurice Merleau-Ponty

whose study of the world is perceived from the view-point of the body; “The world is not

in man but man in the world” (Macann, 1993, p. 161-162.). The theory of the body is a

theory of perception. The world is perceived as being-in-the-world of a subject defined

in terms of its being a body structuring one´s situation and experience of the world

(Macann, 1993). “I consider my body, which is my point of view upon the world, as one of the

objects of that of the world.” (Merleau-Ponty, 1945, p. 73)

I am therefore looking into the psychological well-being of young dancers from an

epistemological stance of subjective, artistic, and qualitative methods with a body

phenomenological methodology referring to previous research in the domains of

psychology and other studies in dance science when appropriate.

5. A MULTI-FACETED PRACTICE-RESEARCH

The following section describes my practice-research of the case, qualitative methods,

and the gathering of empirical material.

5.1 Being a practitioner-researcher

“Sometimes we simply have to keep our eyes open and look carefully at individual cases – not in the

hope of proving anything but rather in the hope of learning something!” (Eysenck, 1976, p. 9 in:

Flyvbjerg, 2006, p. 7)

   

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Perhaps it is hard to actually proof something in a socially constructed science because

of the lack of “hard” theory but it is certainly possible to learn something from a case

study (Flyvbjerg, 2006). Many thoughts have been created about the validity of case

studies, not all of them positive, but still it is noticeable that patterns of behaviour do

occur, and also did in my practice (Jarvis, 1999).

Throughout this study I have been a practitioner-researcher. Getting close to the

students´ experiences through the workshop now makes it possible for me to describe

the experiences and provides me the double role of both a practitioner and a

researcher (Jarvis, 1999). I entered the dance studio conducting research into a

transitory practice therefore also a case study (Jarvis, 1999).

I am using my own experiences on the subject in both practice and writing. I see my

own close relationship to the field of study; myself being a young dance student in an

educational environment having experienced different levels of well-being, as a

resource instead of a hindering because it gives me an insight knowledge on the

subject. Furthermore a sensory approach has naturally entered my practice as part of

my phenomenological methodology, the explosion of interest in the senses across

social sciences, and myself trying to learn in a multi-sensorial way not reduced to the

visual understanding (Pink, 2009).

5.2 Qualitative methods

As the practitioner-researcher I have collected empirical material in various qualitative

formats. I have been writing field journals (Appendices 4-6) to remember my own

experiences of the workshop. Furthermore I recorded the classes with a stand camera

as documentation leading “If Mirrors Could Tell Stories – a documentation” being

part of this thesis

The most important aspect was though to hear the students´ reflections about their felt

experiences of the class when balancing technique, autonomy, and creativity. The

students were told that it was an experiment in which I was interested in their honest

feelings being collected through free writings and video diaries as described in the

following. Important to mention is it that the word well-being was neither mentioned

during the workshop nor in the collection of data.

   

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5.3 Students´ felt experiences

The main empirical material has shown to be the free writings of the students

conducted after the last class of the workshop. The method of free writing was chosen

to get the students´ spontaneous reflections as a continuation of how to create

autonomy and places for well-being in a technical class. When writing the mental well-

spring can be blocked by fear of failure or self-criticism but with the free rules of free

writing this form allows for the students´ self expression (Goldberg, 1986). The

students were asked to write freely about whatever they wanted; their experiences,

something outside the studio, thoughts, and reflections for 7 minutes. Honesty was

emphasized. Different more or less poetic ways of writing appeared in what seemed to

be honest and personal due to the free will of choosing anonymity. (Sample of free

writings, appendix 7)

The students were also requested to do short video diaries about their felt experiences

after each class, recording themselves or something else in order for them to have the

choice of anonymity here as well. The video diaries function as my second prioritised

data and some of them are shown in the DVD and film clips.

The choice of prioritising the data considers the collection of all of the students´ 21

free writings on the last day but not all of the video diaries due to practical/technical

circumstances. An important factor was to have the story of the whole group in

writing their narratives, which leads me into introducing and arguing for my narrative

approach.

5.4 Looking the narrative way

To be able to present the honesty and personalities shining through the free writings

and video diaries I decided on a narrative approach for the analysis to be able to tell

the stories of the students, as I felt obliged to do.

The narrative approach far from tells exactly “how” to do it but the method is

especially being used in sports science with professor Andrew Sparkes´ introduction of

a narrative way of looking at science. Sparkes wishes scientists to position themselves

as storytellers because they often appear in narrative positions telling other people´s

stories. The narrative approach is a way to make my writing and personality fit

(Sparkes, 2002 in: Degerbøl, 2013), furthermore combine my academic and artistic

   

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skills while making meaning out of the stories I literally and metaphorically speaking

have been told during the practice-research (Degerbøl, 2013).

I find the narrative approach far more corresponding when writing about dance as an

art form than a more traditional, academic approach. The narrative exceeds the

limitations between arts and academics, facts and fiction and is all about the dynamic

between self and others as Degerbøl explains when writing about the anthology

“Moving Writing” by Denison & Markula (2003) (Degerbøl, 2013)

 

5.5 Extracting narratives

To extract the narratives for the analysis the free writings were coded (Degerbøl,

2013). Codes coming from my own experience, and which I had thought of

beforehand linking to the notion of well-being like joy, fun, positive feelings and

emotions connected to dance, the connection to space, feelings of autonomy etc. were

underlined. Other notions either connecting to well-being or often repeated appeared

and therefore I also coded those; openness, the teacher role, live music etc. 12

categories ended up on each their paper with codes relating to well-being, ill-being or

both. For each category I had found between 3 and 18 codes in the 21 free writings

from the final day of the workshop. Figure 1 shows the 12 categories.

Figure 1: “12 Categories”

How do you feel right now?

Perhaps a bit stiff from sitting down for a long time?

Stretch your arms yawning to the sky, take a walk around the room to observe;

the smell, the light, the sounds… then come back.

Do you feel better?

Physical/technical New/different

Music Positive feelings

No motivation Negative feelings

Creative part Space/room/atmosphere

Teacher role Openness

Autonomy Emotions

   

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5.6 My artistic voice

From the coding I chose to write about three types of persons that I found stood out.

The types I did not only choose as matter of how many times they appeared but as a

matter of the relevance towards the subject of psychological well-being in my opinion

(Degerbøl, 2013). I tried to understand each type across different stories in the free

writings. Instead of writing about three selected individuals I have compiled stories

from various persons telling about the same experiences (Degerbøl, 2013). One could

argue to dig deeper into the individuals but wanting to include the voice of the whole

class I have chosen to write across the stories (Degerbøl, 2013). From the compilation I

created the narrative “If Mirrors Could Tell Stories” about three fictive persons; Ella,

Jenny, and Maria. The names of the fictive persons are made up because the

narratives include stories from various students but also due to ethical consent forms

(Appendix 1) being signed and promising the anonymity of all of the participants in

the written dissertation.

Using this method is a way of expressing my artistic voice. I am aware of the fact that

when choosing just to write about three themes from approximately 20 free writings I,

as the storyteller, decide what to be presented but certainly also what is not being

presented. A first step of analysis is then already happening within my narrative and it

becomes a representation of both the students´ and my artistic voice (Degerbøl, 2012).

Furthermore my artistic voice is represented in the black textboxes as a way of inviting

the readers into a more sensing, phenomenological way of paying attention to

psychological well-being.

5.7 Study design

The wish to be the best possible dancer arose during my educational years in the age

of 18-22 years old, which intensified the pressure on myself. My self-esteem got lower,

and turned into a feeling of ill-being instead of enjoying dancing. This memory made

me choose my group of participants.

For one week in March 2014 I taught 3 times 1,5 hours of contemporary technique

classes accompanied by live music followed by 3 times 1 hour of a creative class at

Copenhagen Contemporary Dance School´s (CCDS) 1-year pre-vocational

programme for contemporary dancers aged 16-26 years old.

   

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The purpose was to dive into their felt experiences during their daily training. My

wish was to design and present a class, which I predicted would make myself feel

psychological well-being. It contained moments of “tuning in”, technique exercises,

physical elements, moving across the floor, phrase, musical elements (Notes for the

design of the class, appendix 2) and moments of autonomy and creativity.

Especially the creative part was an investigation since I myself am not always

comfortable participating in creative workshops. I chose to include it since I from own

experience and other studies have become aware of the fact that balancing technical

and creative elements has the potential to create psychological well-being as well as

preparing artistically and personally for a career in professional dance (Watson et al.,

2012).

6. LIMITATIONS AND CONSIDERATIONS

A lot of considerations, here presented, have arisen during the practice-research.

I am aware of the fact that I as the practitioner-researcher had already been choosing

a subject; psychological well-being, drawn from my own experience, before entering

the case study. Therefore the subject, the theories, and the narratives are standing

almost side-by-side hierarchically speaking though with an emphasis on the narratives

the voices of the students, and my teaching approach in the further analysis and

discussion. Throughout the free writings many stories stood out. Not all of them can

be presented in this study. Had I chosen to focus on other stories different narratives

would have appeared (Degerbøl, 2012). It underlines that not only three types of

students existed in the class. The three fictive persons should not be seen as stereotypes

but as illustrations of a class with many various personalities. Important to mention is

it that, the study, appearing from my starting point, is a case study, which gives a

narrow but though real picture of this specific reality.

The choice of theories has been a consideration. While the theories are of personal

interest to me they are also major notions that can take years to fully understand. It

has created some limitations because a lot of the theories are new to me. It has also

created challenges in terms of really wanting to dive into the theories and understand

them while at the same time being aware of not being capable of doing it due to the

time limit. I can only hope that a roughly and fair review is being presented.

   

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Now I would like to invite you into a world of young dancers and their education.

7. If Mirrors Could Tell Stories Imagine that we are standing in a dance studio. It is Wednesday, the second day of the workshop. The

air is warm and dry on your skin. Even the smell seems really dry. Across the floor a wind machine is

placed telling about the temperature probably reaching high levels sometimes. Right now it is off.

Around 20 dance students are lying almost entangled in piles on the floor. A bunch of girls and two

boys all of them wearing cosy dance clothes. They seem tired. Not many of them are moving. Only a

few stretch or warm up alone and away from the piles of small groups. They are lying close to each

other listening to James Blake floating out of the speakers with his nostalgic voice singing this morning

from a broken iPod connected to the stereo.

The light is white shining from the not very inviting fluorescent lamps in the ceiling. The walls are

white as well throwing back the colour from the lamps. One wall is covered with pale yellow, shiny

stone bricks. They remind somewhat of an old-fashioned kitchen in dusty colours. Another wall is

covered halfway with mirrors. The mirrors tell where the front of the studio is. If mirrors could tell

stories… Entering the door to the right a piano fills up the space witnessing live music sometimes being

played here. Today it is not a pianist but a percussionist and electronic musician accompanying my

contemporary class with the students.

A fulfilling feeling

In this very moment an adventurous soundscape fills up the whole room. The electronic music floats out

the hands of the musician like magic. There is a subtle calmness of the class. The students are all

standing closed-eyes, landing their body and mind in the room listening to the music. A certain

togetherness of the group seems to be there now sharing this experience after having run around the

room. “Listen to each other´s breaths” the teacher says. One girl seems very focused. She is standing

totally still, her eyes closed and her face witnessing her mind absorbed into a universe of her own,

which the world around her is unable to enter. Ella, her name is, notices the tickling feeling of energy

drifting around her body right underneath her skin after the run around between her classmates. She

remembers dwelling completely into the exercise of just running. Now she is standing using this free time

given by the teacher to feel how she is. She appreciates a free moment and exploits the pause to think.

She understands how this class is build up to allow her to work and accept her feelings instead of

leaving them behind. It helps. She finds that she learns something about herself.

   

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They are all asked to open their eyes again letting in the light and moving on to a more technical part of

the class Ella finds that this way of moving really talks to her body. It is such a comfortable way of

dancing and she feels good when noticing how she is now able to do the repeated plié exercise in the

centre of the room in a more relaxed way on this second day of the workshop. Ella works with the

guiding from the teacher who focuses on elongation, the heaviness of the body as well as rhythm and

quality of movements especially in the swing sequence where Ella lets go and use the substantial weight

of her arms. The class seems pressure-less yet challenging because of to the teacher´s continuously

changing of the front of the room. Ella notices how she feels her senses being opened and awakened. She

keeps seeing different dimensions of the room and is now also noticing her classmates working. Even

though her mind sometimes seems out of focus her body is in deep concentration.

Baabambaba´ba´ba´baaam.

The drums fill the room with fast beats. Suddenly the energy of the class reaches higher levels and the

dancers shift from focused concentration to happy, smiling faces. The live music gives new energy and

power in collaboration with the new and different way of dancing. This change is refreshing Ella

thinks to herself while jumping quickly across the diagonal with speedy, articulated feet. She is having

fun. The structure of the class is creating a new concept, openness, and inspires to new group dynamics

probably also due the human attitude of the teacher who is being honest, sweet and nice. Ella senses a

pounding on the inside of her throat. It is her pulse after the big jumps across the diagonal.

The music slows down to an adventurous soundscape again. Ella lies down on the back as the teacher

asks them to do; to lie down in their favourite position taking a moment to reflect on their felt

experiences. She closes her eyes and falls into her own universe again. Joy is what comes into her mind.

The class has been giving and learning without feeling pressure.

After a short break Ella finds herself in a creative game. Even though the surroundings are still the

same the setting is different. Her and one of her classmates move around physical things on the floor; a

wallet, a long elastic band and a little silver remote control. She just does instead of being thinking too

much and she feels how her creativity is being stimulated due to the game. “Now let your own

bodies become part of the game”, the teacher says. Ella finds herself moving around in the game

now. She not only feels allowed to be creative, she feels creative in this moment moving around between

physical things and human beings. She throws herself into the game without actually thinking. She is

being let by other people and follows their ideas in the actual moment. At one point she is on top of

another person, at another she is carrying someone, and the next moment she is stretching out the elastic

band between her and another dancer. It has become one, large choreography and she is surprisingly

enough feeling safe in the middle of this kind of chaotic yet structured atmosphere. The safety makes her

dare and not fear rejection.

   

16

The class ends in a circle, and reflection and thoughts are being shared. Open Ella thinks and shares

with the rest of the groups. She herself and her senses feel opened up (Watch the video Openness).

Yes, this being creative still felt terrible

Jenny cannot relate to what Ella is talking about. She does not feel opened up at all after this creative

part of the class. She is sitting in the circle and feeling very uncomfortable actually. She does not want

to share her feelings right now. During this latest creative class she just felt terrible. One moment of the

class visualises before her eyes. She sees herself in the chaos of the studio; lipstick, clothes, food being

moved around, and people all over the place doing crazy movements. The room smells like hairspray

and a lit matchstick. Apparently someone thought it would be funny to light fire for a moment. The

more they do the less she feels like doing and she remembers the feelings of not wanting to do anything

at all. She hates the pressure of having to be funny that often follows along these creative tasks she

thinks. She looks at the rest of the group. She wishes she would just not care so much and just do

instead. She knows it is her own way of thinking that prevents her from throwing herself into the

creative tasks. When the teacher told them to do the simplest possible movement they could come up

with her body calmed down. She found it much more interesting to use purposes instead of her fellow

dancers just doing all kinds of wild and crazy things. Yes, this being creative felt terrible she thinks to

herself again and follows her thoughts back to this morning and the technique class while the group

continues evaluating in the circle.

Jenny really liked the technique class and exercises being given to them. She found herself being focused

and able to work with herself within the given structures. During the first warm-up exercise where they

started rolling down through the spine she could really focus and sitting here in the circle she can still

sense the heaviness of her body from the swing exercise even almost hear the drums giving her energy and

drive. Working technically in a different and new way than she was used to had been great and she

had enjoyed all the technique classes so far. Yet the uncomfortable feeling from the creative class was

stuck in her mind and heart here at the end of the day and she still felt like kind of a disaster.

Physical devotion

Dadamdadadadadam!

Maria swings her arms heavily to the ground. She feels the pulse of the music within her own body and

the energy is finally flowing. Finally! She has been waiting for this moment. Earlier this morning when

watching inside the studio one would have seen a girl standing fiddling with her fingers while most of

the group was standing in parallel feet, facing different directions with closed eyes. But Maria could

not focus. Maria could not concentrate about the exercise turning inward. “Notice your felt experience,

   

17

listen to the music and each other, pay attention to the smells”, the teacher asked. Actually Maria felt a

lack of challenge she thought while standing shifting a bit of weight from one foot to the other. During

the first day she had been missing some faster exercises and maybe even a further development of the

class. She really just loved the physicality of dancing, using the power of the music, and getting up the

speed. Even though the teacher, in her opinion, presented this swinging exercise too late, it came as a

pleasant surprise (Watch the video Live Music). The swinging to the touchable beat of the drums and

the fast crossing of the diagonals gave her the sensation of physicality that she loved. Now sitting in the

circle she found it unnecessary to keep evaluating. She felt they were over analysing and she missed just

dancing. It made her think of the creative process they had been going through 5 minutes ago.

Maria sits on the floor. Suddenly the wet sensation of another person painting her with red lipstick all

over the face reaches her chin. “Unnecessary and childish”, Maria thinks to herself. “It is like a

kindergarten for adults.” She looks around the room focusing on something in another group not being

fully aware of the moment with her partner. To be honest she does not know how this game is

connected to dance and she goes in and out of the feeling of being focused and unable to focus.

Sitting in the circle here at the end of the final day of three workshops she does not say anything. She

feels like a lot of her classmates are saying a lot of meaningful and clever things about the workshop

and how it has benefitted them in a personal way. She keeps quiet not really sure whether she agrees

with them or not.

8. ANALYSIS

By previously having chosen to extract narratives from the empirical material an

analysis by me as the practitioner-researcher and storyteller already begun (Degerbøl,

2013, p. 312). For the transparency of my dissertation a further analysing of the

narratives including reflections and quotations from the narratives is now following.

8.1 Presentation of the persons

Ella was pleased with everything we did in the workshop: both technically and

creatively. Ella has the longest narrative due to a presentation of most of the students

communicating a joy and fulfilment through their free writings and video diaries. That

demanded my prioritising of their voices in a longer narrative. Jenny is an extraction

   

18

of the fewer ones who really enjoyed the technical part and structure but got a feeling

of insufficiency when having to be creative. Finally Maria is representing a more

bodily person who enjoyed the physicality of dancing and got energy from the music.

She was though troubling with concentrating inwards and found the creative part

sometimes unnecessary and not relating to dance.

In the following a split analysis and discussion of the themes; enjoying dancing,

autonomous space, room for creativity, energizing live music, and

openness, which I found stood out in all narratives of the themes, are being

presented with an emphasis of analysing and discussing the students´ experiences

relating to my teaching approach. The analysis is split up in order to open for the

possibility of reading the themes separately though there is an obvious link between

them altogether.

To stress the importance of enjoying dancing relating to psychological well-being of

young dancers this theme will now follow.

 

8.2 Enjoying dancing

The study found that all of the students in some way communicated their joy of

dancing throughout the workshop. Since passion is found related to aspects of

psychological and physical well-being that is positive (Redding et al., 2011). Without

passion a future career within the branch of dance seems impossible especially if it has

to include psychological well-being. Related to my teaching Ella expresses that “this

way of moving really talks to her body” and says that she is “having fun” when

jumping across the diagonal. This can be seen as happiness and thereby a step towards

psychological wealth (Diener & Biswas-Diener, 2008). In the same manner Jenny tells

how she “really liked the technique class and exercises being given to them” and

Maria uses the expression love in her relation to dance when she thinks of how, “She

really just loved the physicality of dancing.” Apart from agreeing on the fact that they

enjoy dancing the students´ expressions of how and what they enjoy about dancing

differ. The more bodily person Maria says: “During the first day she had been missing

some faster exercises and maybe even a further development of the class.” Ella and

Jenny express how they either think that “The class seems pressure-less yet

   

19

challenging” and “Working technically in a different and new way than she was used

to had been great”. As a teacher it gives me an indication of the differences of

enjoyment that my participants felt during my teaching and the finding is adding to

the subjective well-being that Diener & Biswas-Diener talk about when saying that it is

about people´s own evaluation of important areas of their lives (2008).

I wanted to present a class I predicted could make myself feel well-being through

various elements but I could never be assured that it was going to happen for the

students. What shows in my field journal is however that a great part of the students

enjoyed the elements of technique exercises, physical elements, moving across the

floor, and the musical elements.

“We start to jump. First small jumps in the centre then across the floor. It is funny how

it always makes people smile and laugh. I guess there is something to this moving fast

and the live drums that keep up the energy in a natural way.” (Field journal

Wednesday the 26th of March 2014, appendix 5)

A question is therefore whether I as a teacher could have created a class with an

enjoyable outcome also for the few who felt they lacked challenge like Maria who

expresses “The swinging to the beat of the drums and the crossing of the diagonals

gave her the sensation of physicality that she loved.” The exercises that created the

enjoyment also for the ones who felt they lacked challenge could therefore have been

presented earlier likewise expressed in my field journal.

“The students laugh and talk a bit and they really seem to enjoy moving across the

floor. They have smiles on their faces and I feel we could have spent more time on this

(note to self).” (Field journal, Monday the 24th of March 2014, appendix 4)

However I would like to argue that the “simplicity” of enjoyment is not everything like

Diener & Biswas-Diener express saying that “Positive emotions are not simply joy but also an

abundance of feelings such as love, commitment and gratitude that connects them to each other” (2008,

p. 8). The joy of dancing can also be found in other commitments than those

appearing from outer factors like fast exercises to the beat of music. E.g. from a

commitment of the autonomous moments, which most of the students appreciated

and which I will now turn my attention to.

   

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8.3 Autonomous space

The ability to focus on the moments of autonomy stands out in some of the students´

stories. “She appreciates a free moment and exploits the pause to think.” Especially

the students presented in Ella expresses how they have enjoyed the “landing their

body and mind in the room” and be able to pay attention to their felt experiences.

“Now she is standing using this free time given by the teacher to feel how she is.”

As the teacher I was thinking of how to incorporate space for the students´ individual

voices while keeping a teacher guided technical class. I tried that by balancing dance

technique with a “rounded education” to help the dancers find their creative voice

(Redding et al., 2011). Seen in the greatest number of students is an appreciation of

autonomy whether it being reflection-pauses, allowance to improvise over a given

form or the creative part of the class and goes in line with the recent “calls for a balance

between nurturing personal or own voice and autonomy (expression) alongside the teaching of domain

knowledge and skills (form). (Chappell 2006; Chappell et al. 2011 in: Watson et al. 2012, p. 17).

The autonomous moments inserted as space for reflection became a time and place

for the voice of the individual student advancing the young dancers towards a feeling

of well-being. Previous “Research has shown correlations between involvements in physical activity

and enhanced personal well-being (Gillison and Standage, 2007), especially activities in which

autonomy and a sense of competence and achievement are promoted.” (Connolly et al., 2011, p. 58).

Likewise found in other studies (Ames 1992 and Deci and Ryan 1985; Quested 2009

in: Watson et el., 2011).

“I let them improvise over the material and do what they feel like and need this

morning. They all seem to enjoy it and engage in the exercise. It is like an ocean of

movement and a focused calmness descends on top of the room. It seems right and

makes the students and I relax I feel.” (Field journal Wednesday the 26th of March

2014, appendix 5)

It is though interesting that what can be seen as fulfilling moments of free space for

some students can be challenging to others, which I sensed during the classes.

“One girl is having trouble with focusing on just closing her eyes, standing still and

paying attention to her own body, her own sensation. At least that is my interpretation

of it. She opens her eyes, looks around the room. It feels like she is either

   

21

uncomfortable or really bored. I recognize some of myself in her. I know what it is like

to feel unease or not focused during a class because not getting to move. This is

definitely affecting me as the teacher. I am thinking whether to comment on it or not

but I decide not to. I have already made the decision that there space for free

interpretation in my class should be there and this is how she feels like now.” (Field

journal, Monday the 24th of March 2014, appendix 4)

Throughout the dance studies I have looked at, the emphasis on autonomous

atmospheres/task-involving climates (Watson et al. 2012, Klockare et al. 2011,

Redding et al., 2011, Connolly et al. 2011) towards well-being or higher self-esteem

have been in focus. The findings of my practice-research support that, which is equally

communicated in Maslow´s observations of self-actualizing people within the area of

psychological health that includes being problem centred, autonomous, and creative

(Maslow, 1989).

When looking at the autonomous space as a way of nurturing well-being it is

important to remember that the students are individual and not everyone finds well-

being when e.g. improvising over a given form like it was sometimes facilitated

through my practice. Like Diener & Biswas-Diener (2008) say about subjective well-

being it is essential to be involved in meaningful and important activities as well as

finding activities in which you can use your strengths. In this practice-research not

everyone found strength in the autonomous or creative spaces being given to them but

rather in the technical part. It looks like some of these students felt pressured and not

good enough when having to be creative as communicated in the story of Jenny.

Instead their competencies were promoted through the structured, technical part:

“She found herself being focused and able to work with herself within the given

structures”. For some it feels more beneficial to get the structure from a teacher

instead of having to “structure” movements by oneself. This leads me to look at how

the room for creativity also affected the students differently.

   

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8.4 Room for creativity

“Some of them really do want to be professionals so if it means finding a way to be creative, they

will… others enjoy it for what it is, and (others) like the technical side of it (dance technique training)

and actually would rather go home at three o´clock than do a creative class.” (Watson et al. 2012, p.

9)

The above quote from a teacher being part of the study by Watson et al. 2012 is

relevant in relation to my practice-research. The students belonging to the fictive

person of Maria say that they love the technical part but would rather leave their

training for the day than stay to be creative (Watson et al. 2012). The students in this

group expressed how they “loved the physicality of dancing, using the power of the

music and getting up the speed … The swinging to the touchable beat of the drums

and the fast crossing of the diagonals gave her the sensation of physicality that she

loved”. The creative part was though frustrating and expressed by a reflection in a free

writing; “It is like a kindergarten for adults… To be honest she does not know how

this game is connected to dance and she goes in and out of the feeling of being focused

and unable to focus.” Studying their reflections as a teacher was a challenging

encounter to me due to the many attitudes towards my teaching and it could be hard

not to take it personally.

“I feel I have put myself in a really vulnerable position as a teacher and I am thinking

how brave teachers in general are.” (Field journal Friday the 28th of March 2014,

appendix 6)

I felt insecure and vulnerable because I really put my strengths, weaknesses, and flaws

“out there” to create openness and honesty (Maslow, 1989) with the risk of being

judged. I opened up for them to comment on their felt experiences, which naturally

made some of them comment on my teaching and me since I was part of their

experience.

As the practitioner-researcher and dancer their experiences made perfectly sense.

Neither I could link creative tasks to me becoming a better dancer in my vocational

years. I rather wanted to improve myself as a technical dancer. Therefore I

understand these thoughts when Jenny expresses “The more they do the less she feels

like doing and she remembers the feelings of not wanting to do anything at all. She

   

23

hates the pressure of having to be funny that often follows along these creative tasks

she thinks.” As a younger dancer, it was somehow always easier for me to feel joy and

optimal experiences through a teacher guided and structured class where I was told

what to do. That was the place where my optimal experiences arose, and where my

body and mind were being challenged to the limit (Csikszentmihalyi, 1989). Having to

be creative I often felt a lack of control and too challenged developing into not feeling

good about myself like Jenny expresses with “Yes, this being creative felt terrible”.

It seems that the sort of anxiety in relation to creativity can appear due to students

having “…unreasonable high demands on themselves…” (Klockare et al., 2011, p. 283). It

therefore contradicts the theory of flow, which will not appear if one feels one´s

competencies are not enough compared to the challenges one meet (Csikszentmihalyi,

1989).

It can be questioned whether the creative part of the class was simply too challenging?

During the “creative part” I used the word “creative” many times and the space being

created was very autonomous with only very little teacher guiding. I could therefore be

considered whether the word “play” and more teacher lead tasks could have taken off

the pressure for some students. Creativity, from my own experience, can lead to

thinking that you have to create something new, amazing, or funny. The same

associations are often not found in the word “play”. By offering the students different

ways of being creative/play the workshop possibly could have reached more students.

However the students represented in Ella enjoyed the freedom of the creative part

allowing them to be creative and play. “She just does instead of being thinking too

much and she feels how her creativity is being stimulated due to the game”

Additionally the creative part of the class was the place where I as the teacher

experienced true flow also from a sensuous and body phenomenological viewpoint.

“In some way all I feel like writing here is FLOW. It is amazing to experience the

students being so engaged in the creative workshop that I completely change my

plans. I want them to learn material but we never get to do that because they are just

playing, being engaged, laughing, interacting, moving. It is amazing to see and the

hour just passes so quickly… Landscapes of bodies are created. It is not just bodies but

engaged, happy bodies. Bodies that are excited to move and interact with each other. I

am speechless… At least the flow was really noticeable – almost touchable in the

   

24

second class where the students were so into the game that they forgot about time and

space.” (Field journal Monday the 24th of March 2014, appendix 4)

Suddenly an hour had passed in what seemed like 5 minutes and the students seemed

to have experienced the same due to their bodies and minds being united in a truly

ecstatic moment of both physicality and mentality. (Knoop 2004 in: Knoop&Lyhne et

al., 2005)

Here I will, as s little pre-conclusion, despite my own contradictory feelings about

creative workshops argue that creative moments should be prioritised in dancers´

training since flow was without a doubt obvious and leading to a sense of well-being

both for many of the students and me as the teacher. (Watch the video Room for

Creativity).

Due to many opposing feelings it seems challenging to cultivate a feeling of well-being

for everyone. I will therefore turn to a bonding concept of all the students; the live

music.

8.5 Energizing live music

The live music and especially the drums created a refreshing and energizing

experience for all of the students. Ella feels how “The drums fill the room with fast

beats. Suddenly the energy of the class reaches higher levels and the dancers shift from

focused concentration to happy, smiling faces”, while Jenny is sensing the music after

the class; “she could still sense the heaviness of her body from the swing exercise even

almost hear the drums giving her energy and drive” and Maria uses the music as her

drive. It shows that the music and the students´ positive attitude towards it can be part

of the process to happiness (Diener & Biswas-Diener, 2008, p. 14-16) In practice I felt

the same.

“I change to a happier feeling with the music – also just to change the atmosphere. We

start to jump. First small jumps in the centre then across the floor. It is funny how it

always makes people smile and laugh. I guess there is something to this moving fast

and the live drums that keeps up the energy in a natural way.” (Field journal,

Wednesday the 26th of March, 2014)

   

25

Csikszentmihalyi supports this in his section about flow in music writing that listening

to music often begins as a sensuous experience reacting to the qualities of the music

inducing physical reactions in us. We are especially sensuous to the sounds of drums

(Csikszentmihalyi, 1989). In that way the internal sensation of the music can be seen as

a phenomenological sensation from the students´ first person viewpoint.

The drums could have been presented earlier during the classes to create the

energizing sensation. But as noticeable in Ella´s narrative my intention was to have the

music partly setting the atmosphere (Appendix 3. Lesson plan Monday with music

notes) by shifting from soundscapes to beats. Using the fast beats of the drums

probably could have created stronger feelings of energy but it can be discussed

whether outer factors like the live music should always be significant during a dance

class and if it should be a deciding factor of feel-good. Cause using the music in diverse

ways stimulates our senses differently like communicated in the narrative of Ella: “In

this very moment an adventurous soundscape fills up the whole room. The electronic

music floats out the hands of the musician like magic. There is a subtle calmness of the

class.”

Additionally many of the dancers communicated an appreciation of the “new” both in

terms the live music and movements. It was refreshing and much needed. It appears

that the joy of what was different affected the participants in a positive way. The

ability to appreciate “freshly and naively, the basic goods of life, with awe, pleasure, wonder, and

even ecstasy” (Maslow, 1989, p. 136) is in Maslow´s words the ability of self-actualizing

people described as the full realization of one´s potential and for me somewhat a sign

of well-being.

8.6 Openness

During my teaching I changed directions in the studio to pay attention to the space

and each other.

“The students are facing different directions and it almost seem like an ocean; arms

moving up and down, the ripple through their back and their balancing.” (Field

journal Monday the 24th of March)

   

26

A student mentions how she feels open. Her senses are open, her body feels open

because of the movements, and she is open to the room because of the change of

directions in space.

In relation to body phenomenology Merleau-Ponty describes this sensation in the

words of the world offering itself to the sensory subject being the body who will in turn

respond (Merleau-Ponty, 1945). It appears like the change of directions offers the

students a way of responding to the space and creates more openness.

Found in other studies the stimulation of openness by me, as the teacher, has possibly

been a way of nurturing creativity (Redding et al., 2011).

In relation to the importance of honesty that Maslow mentions when he writes about

openness (Maslow, 1989) I believe my attempt to be as honest as possible as their

teacher by expressing that I was also in a learning process affected their sensations of

openness, which is seen in the narrative “a fulfilling feeling”: “The class is creating a new

concept and openness and inspires to new group dynamics probably also due the

human attitude of the teacher who is being honest, sweet and nice.”

How is your feeling of openness?

Are you open towards creativity and autonomy?

9. QUESTIONING CREATIVITY AND AUTONOMY

To be further discussed are the room for creativity and the autonomous space

because the study shows most conflicting attitudes in the students´ stories of these

themes.

Throughout the study it appears how a lot of other dance studies argue for creativity.

The large study “Passion, Pathways and Potential in Dance” writes how, “Creativity has

also been seen as a form of well-being or an example of optimal human functioning. Indeed, if a

dancer felt their creativity was optimized, this could lead to greater fulfilment and well-being – and

good use of artistic potential.” (Redding et al., 2011, p. 56) In my findings some students did

not feel optimized when having to be creative. Rather they felt a lack of challenge or

even anxiety due to pressure of performing in the creative part (Klockare et al., 2011).

   

27

Instead I would argue for psychological well-being constituted by elements of one´s

own definition of subjective well-being (Diener & Biswas-Diener, 2008) when at the

best creating a feeling of flow where one feels challenged and engaged to the

maximum while doing the things one prefer (Csikszentmihalyi, 1989). What the

students preferred was not necessarily creativity, it could be, as shown in most of the

participants, but some did not prefer the creative games or lots of autonomous space.

Hereby the study is not promoting that “either or” is “the best”. Instead it shows that

we as dance educators should pay attention to both possibilities; fostering a feel-good

through creativity and autonomy or through technique classes in order to reach out to

most possible students.

What this study does not focus on is whether psychological well-being is always the

right feeling to strive for in young dance students´ education. And whether the striving

for that feeling is the job of the dance educator? The study is emphasizing the

importance of psychological well-being, being a human right for everyone (Redding et

al., 2011). The study though also shows that it is unrealistic always to maintain a

positive psychological feeling shown in both the story of Jenny and Maria who do not

reach feelings of psychological well-being through the creative part. From my

subjective dancer view-point being in a dance education and thereby learning process

demands a balance of psychological well-being but also frustration and challenge to

push oneself and thereby develop.

10. CONCLUSION

In conclusion this practice-research showed a variety of different experiences by the

students in the dance class designed in the hope of fostering psychological well-being.

The study recognizes earlier studies done in the area where balancing technical skills

with creativity is emphasized to help dancers achieve fulfilling careers with enough

personal resources to enter the challenging area of dance seen in the light of statistics

revealing dancers suffering from different sorts of ill-being (Watson et al., 2012). This

brings forth the importance of us as dance educators facilitating a task-involving

climate leading to individual well-being (Watson et al., 2012) as well as daring

openness, difference, and experiments, which can then be felt by the students as

creating energy and newness (Watson et al., 2012).

   

28

The above is an expression of most students in this practice-research. They described

their experiences as a focus on both their felt experiences and technical exercises as

well as being able to use the autonomous moments and learn something about

themselves. Also they communicated feelings of openness, joy, fun, being creatively

stimulated towards a feeling of flow. It appears that for these students the dance class

constructed for this practice-research could be a way of fostering some sort of

psychological well-being. Their experiences from the dance class connect to my

personal notion of psychological well-being especially in dance where the physical

dimension is balanced with moments of autonomy and creativity in small expanses.

These students also have the ability not to think too much and not judge themselves in

the creative part but be able to go with the flow and actually experience optimality.

What this study stresses is that creativity can be a way to enhance psychological well-

being but is not always the case as it seems to create psychological pressure for some as

well. Creative exercises did not necessarily foster creativity and thus resulted in feelings

of ill-being rather than well-being. For the students who experienced this especially the

creative part nurtured a feeling of being bored, lack of challenge, or even going so far

to feel pressured and not good about themselves. This has the potential to be

interpreted as ill-being rather than the opposite. What is therefore most important is

the subjective experience of psychological well-being of each individual person.

Overall the fostering of psychological well-being through a technical class with room

for autonomy, openness, and creativity showed to be a complex situation with many

different outcomes of experiences by the students. Evident is it that further research

should be done in the area of dance and psychological well-being due to the

importance of psychological aspects in dance. The movement of dance science has

already started an investigation.

In the future further questions about the importance of a balance between feelings of

psychological well-being and e.g. frustration and challenge of young dance students in

their learning process could be asked. Furthermore whether it is the job of the dance

educators to foster psychological well-being in their students.

In order to develop the area of dance and dance education, looking into other fields of

research and science is hereby emphasized with this study.

 

   

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11. BIBLIOGRAPHY

Csikszentmihalyi, M. 2005, Flow. Optimaloplevelsens psykologi, Dansk Psykologisk Forlag,

1st edn. Copenhagen.

Connolly, M.K., Quin, E. & Redding, E. 2011, “dance 4 your life: exploring the

health and well-being implications of a contemporary dance intervention for female

adolescents.” Research in Dance Education, Vol. 12, no. 1, pp. 53-66.

Degerbøl, S.M. 2013, “Narrativ Analyse”, LF Thing & LS Ottesen (red.), Metoder i

Idrætsforskning. Munksgård Danmark, Copenhagen pp. 308-323

Degerbøl, S.M. 2012, “Et fast greb i rebet”, Nordic Journal of Dance, Vol. 3, no. 2,

pp. 25-37.

Diener, E. & Biswas-Diener, R. 2008, Happiness: unlocking the mysteries of psychological

wealth, 1st edn. Blackwell Publishing Ltd., Oxford.

Flyvbjerg, B. 2006, “Five Misunderstandings About Case-Study Research”,

Qualitative Inquiry, vol. 12, no. 2, pp. 219-245.

Goldberg, N. 1986, Writing Down the Bones: Freeing the Writer Within, Shambhala

Publications, Inc., Boston.

Jarvis, P. 1999, The Practitioner-Researcher, Developing Theory from Practice, 1st edn. John

Wiley and Sons, Inc., New York.

Klockare, E., Gustafsson, H. & Nordin-Bates, S.M. 2011, “An interpretative

phenomenological analysis of how professional dance teachers implement

psychological skills training in practice”, Research in Dance Education, Vol. 12, no. 3,

pp. 277-293.

Knoop H. & Lyhne J. 2005, Et nyt læringslandskab - Flow, intelligens og det gode læringsmiljø,

1st edn. Dansk Psykologisk Forlag, Copenhagen.

   

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Macann, C. 1993, Four Phenomenological Philosophers, Routledge, Oxon, London.

Maslow, H.A. 1987, Motivation and Personality, 3rd edn. Harper & Row, Publishers,

Inc., New York.

Merleau-Ponty, M. 2012, Phenomenology of Perception, Routledge, Oxon, London.

Ommundsen, Y., Løndal, K. & Loland S. 2014, “Sport, Children, and Well-being”,

A. Ben-Arieh et al. (eds.), Handbook of Child Well-Being, pp. 911-940.

Pink, S. 2009, Doing Sensory Ethnography, SAGE Publications Ltd., London.

Quinn E., Redding E. & Frazer L. 2007, “Dance Science Research Report. The

effects of an eight-week creative dance programme on the physiological and

psychological status of 11-14 year old adolescents: An experimental study”,

Hampshire Dance and Laban, London.

Redding, E., Nordin-Bates, S.M. & Walker, I. 2011, “Passion, Pathways, and

Potential in Dance. Trinity Laban Research Report: An interdisciplinary longitudinal

study into dance talent development”, London.

Watson, D.E., Nordin-Bates S.M. & Chappell K.A. 2012, “Facilitating and nurturing

creativity in pre-vocational dancers: Findings from the UK Centres for Advanced

Training, Research in Dance Education, Vol. 13, no. 2, pp. 1-21.

           

   

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12. APPENDICES

 

Appendix 1 – Ethical Consent Form

ETHICAL CONSENT FORM

Name and age of participant:

This is an agreement of participation in the workshops held during March and April

2014 to inform the research project and final dissertation of Stina Strange, student at

the Dance Partnership Education at the National Danish School of Performing Arts.

The data and information gathered through the workshops will work as empirical

material for the final dissertation. The participant´s name will however be kept

anonymous and the participant will only figure in the dissertation under another

name.

Data and any personal information on the participants gathered during the period of

the workshops will be treated confidentially and data will only be stored in the private,

closed and unpublicised hard disc of Stina Strange.

The participant will be evident in a DVD made from video recordings and video

comments recorded during and after the workshop. The DVD will only be shown in a

closed presentation of the final dissertation at the National Danish School of

Performing Arts.

At any time the participant can choose to withdraw from the project without prior

notice.

Date:

Signature of participant:

   

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Appendix 2 – Notes for the design of the class

THE KIND OF CLASS THAT MAKES ME FEEL WELL ”TUNING IN”

-­‐ Walking around the room. -­‐ Standing focusing on the body or body parts or the inner. -­‐ Lying on the floor. -­‐ Own interpretation to some extent – musically or movement wise.

TECHNIQUE

-­‐ Dance technique (plié, swing, tendue, rdj. etc., floor work) PHYSICAL ELEMENT

-­‐ Jumping -­‐ Running -­‐ Getting up my pulse -­‐ Stability/core

MOVING ACROSS THE FLOOR

-­‐ Flow -­‐ Moving -­‐ Speed -­‐ Somewhat fast -­‐ Simple vs. Challenging

CHOREOGRAPHY

-­‐ Anything – seriously -­‐ Slow, fast, fun, serious, quirky, challenging…

MUSIC

-­‐ To the beat -­‐ Soundscapes with no following of rhythm -­‐ Silence

     

   

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Appendix 3 – Lesson plan

FINAL DISSERTATION ARTISTIC TEACHING PRACTICE COPENHAGEN CONTEMPORARY DANCE SCHOOL DRAFT LESSON PLAN MONDAY 24TH OF MARCH INTRODUCTION (10 min.) (No music)

-­‐ Gather in circle, tell a bit about myself, “my interests in the body and mind, estu:ei”.

-­‐ Explain about research: ”Consciousness about how we feel during our daily training”. “I will teach a contemporary class with focus on technique and your individuality. It is totally ok to make mistakes in my classes; no one is perfect and this is just our daily training and our free place to play and investigate.”

-­‐ Explain recording, video diary and the concept of free writing. -­‐ Sign ethical consent forms.

Transition (Soundscape - no beat – low volume)

-­‐ Come to sit on your toes in a little ball. -­‐ Slowly curl up from your tale bone.

WALK AROUND THE ROOM (5 min) (Music following the dancers walking/running pace)

-­‐ Walk around the room, up on toes, down in knees, outside and inside on your feet. Attention to the room, the smell, the light, the sound, each other, your breath.

-­‐ Speed up until running. -­‐ Find your personal, favourite spot in the room. -­‐ Notice the energy and sensation in your body.

DYNAMIC WARM UP/ROLL DOWN (10 min.) (Soundscape – no beat)

-­‐ Turn to see me. -­‐ Follow me in a slow tempo. -­‐ Walk to find a new favourite place in the room. -­‐ Do the warm up by yourself; own counting, own interpretation.

“TECHNIQUE” PART (20 min.) (I will give music guides, counts and pace, the dancers should follow the music) Transition

-­‐ When finished, roll up, turn to face the front. -­‐ Plié (focus on the balance between elongation and relaxing)

Turn to the right. -­‐ Swing. -­‐ Close your eyes – feel your breath – notice your feeling inside. -­‐ Turn to the front. -­‐ Dancing strengthening exercise – going down to the floor.

   

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Parallel grand plié, crawl forward, slide around, jump to plank, jump to the side, downward facing dog, walk 4, take left leg with right arm, turn to sit, slide back with stretched legs, fall forward, roll over right shoulder, stretch right leg, one chasse´ to the right in low second.

-­‐ Tendue – 2x8 of moving the body as big as possible. -­‐ Flatback. -­‐ Longer phrase starting in second. -­‐ RDJ.

Transition (Soundscape – no beat)

-­‐ Crawl to the back (core crawling) ACROSS THE FLOOR (10 min.) (I will give music guidelines, dancers should follow music)

-­‐ Small jumps. -­‐ Running to the side, small glissades. -­‐ Jumps with leg in passé. -­‐ Big jump starting with jumps with legs in passe´.

PHRASE (20 min.) (Take inspiration from the dancers, maybe just one dancer – beat not necessary)

-­‐ On the floor “Chord Left” -­‐ 2 and 2 in front of each other

COOL DOWN (5 min.) (Low soundscape – no beat)

-­‐ Ask reflecting questions OUTRO (5 min.) (No music)

-­‐ Gather in circle -­‐ Homework – video diary (now) -­‐ Homework – 8 counts on the floor

BREAK (15 min.) 1-HOUR CREATIVE/IMPROVISATION/CHOREOGRAPHY “Bring 3 things into play” (10 min.)

-­‐ Talk about the spontaneous creativity -­‐ Talk about the relationship different relationship between things, people, the

room “Bring yourself into play” (15 min.) (Bon Iver – “Wash”, Bruised Skies Remix”)

-­‐ Imagine a place in the room – go to it -­‐ Imagine a place in the room and a figure – go to it and do the figure -­‐ Imagine a place in the room, a figure and how you will get there x4

“Create phrase” (15 min.)

-­‐ Try to remember what you have just been doing – make a little phrase -­‐ Learn each other´s phrases two an two

   

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“Choreography” (10 min.) (“Chord Left” – Agnes Obel, “Milk” – Moderat)

-­‐ Catch up on the material we have; my phrase, your own phrases -­‐ Relate yourself to other dancers, other things in the room “WE ARE THE

GAME”. Use the material we have generated “Time for video diary”

-­‐ Honesty -­‐ What you have experienced and felt during the classes

Evaluation and reflection

   

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Appendix 4 – Field Journal Monday

FIELD JOURNAL

MONDAY THE 24TH OF MARCH 2014

COPENHAGEN CONTEMPORARY DANCE SCHOOL

TECHNIQUE CLASS 10-11.30

Wow! Where to start this journal of today? I have so many impressions, thoughts,

reflections, feelings and sensations in my body.

To start with my body right now I actually feel a bit tensed in my chest. This nervous

feeling in my chest that I recognize so well when not being sure if I have been doing

well enough…

Nevertheless I think it went pretty well today.

I start by introducing myself. I feel myself paying so much attention to the vibes that

the students send me. Some of them are really excited and some of them seem like

they could not care less about me being there. I try not to be affected by it but I feel I

am. I try to tell myself that some of them are probably feeling really tired, exhausted

or it could be personal/emotional things that has nothing to do with me.

We start the technique class slowly by walking around the room, noticing the space,

looking each other in the eyes. Some of the students are being really engaged in

sending each other Monday morning smiles, other seem naturally more tired. I try to

be patient with my guiding and not speed up the class too much from the beginning.

When we speed up the tempo to running the space seems to fill up with energy. The

sensation is great and I feel I have the attention of the students. I start the class slowly

by guiding the students standing still with closed eyes to pay attention to how they feel,

the sensation of the body.

Significant moment 1

One girl is having trouble with focusing on just closing her eyes, standing still and paying attention to

her own body, her own sensation. At least that is my interpretation of it. She opens her eyes, looks

around the room. It feels like she is either uncomfortable or really bored. I recognize some of myself in

her. I know what it is like to feel unease or not focused during a class because not getting to move. This

is definitely affecting me as the teacher. I am thinking whether to comment on it or not but I decide not

   

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to. I have already made the decision that there should be space for free interpretation in my class and

this is how she feels like now. She does not feel like closing her eyes and standing still. The funny thing

is that I figured it would be like this with this particular girl after having observed the class last week.

She was the one never being able to stand still, always doing strengthening exercises in the middle of a

technique class, having a crazy amount of energy during the whole class. I figured I would have a hard

time motivate her.

I try to leave the girl not being able to close her eyes and continue with guiding the

students to notice the sounds and smells in the room.

We move on to what I in my head have called the more technical part of the class. I

teach them the plié and make them aware of some focus points; elongating and

relaxing. I continue to try sneak in my voice making them focus on how they feel and

not only guiding the exercise. I feel it is difficult and especially as the class goes along I

become more and more focused on helping them with the exercise instead of their

experiences. I do not know whether it is good or bad I just notice it and I sometimes

try to make them close their eyes to recognize their feelings again.

I try to have my focus on also making some transitions in the class where we are not

just going from one exercise to another but also actually moving to the next exercise.

Sometimes I think it works like e.g. making them roll down after our flat back exercise

asking them to choose two feet positions they want to do the exercise in, telling them

to roll up on 16 counts, face another direction and then do the flat back exercise. It

becomes choreography to me. The students are facing different directions and it

almost seem like an ocean; arms moving up and down, the ripple through their back

and their balancing. For me it seems like they do not have to focus so much on

following the group but that they can actually focus on their own bodies. I continue

with what I call some dancy strengthening exercises, we crawl on the floor and learn a

little exercise that needs strength but still moves.

Here I begin to feel that the class is cut up a bit. I cannot make it flow the way I really

want it to but still it is a challenge when I want them to actually learn technical

material as well so I continue trying not to judge myself.

I get to teach them a bit more exercises and I feel myself not having patience enough.

It is as if I expect them to expect me to do a lot of different things. It is a bad habit of

mine I think.

   

38

Getting to the point where we do some exercises and jumps across the floor I feel the

atmosphere changing a bit. Not that the atmosphere has been bad in any way but

there is a shift now to a looser and not so concentrated atmosphere. The students

laugh and talk a bit and they really seem to enjoy moving across the floor. They have

smiles on their faces and I feel we could have spent more time on this (note to self).

I end the class by cooling down and guide them to reflect on their experiences of the

class. They lie down, closed eyes, probably thinking.

CREATIVE CLASS 11.45-12.45

In some way all I feel like writing here is FLOW. It is amazing to experience the

students being so engaged in the creative workshop that I completely change my

plans. I want them to learn material but we never get to do that because they are just

playing, being engaged, laughing, interacting, moving. It is amazing to see and the

hour just passes so quickly.

We start by doing Susan´s game with moving things around each other. They are all

smiling, some of them very concentrated, other just really having fun. A lot of

interesting things are coming out of it and they start to place their items on each other.

Instead of interrupting them I go with the flow and make their bodies be an item.

They are now allowed to move themselves and each other around the room. They do

so with as much enthusiasm as before. Creativity is just flowing around the space like if

they have never done anything else their whole lives. I am excited walking around

recording the students. I decide to develop even further and continue the flow. They

can now interact with other groups – and so they definitely do. Landscapes of bodies

are created. It is not just bodies but engaged, happy bodies. Bodies that are excited to

move and interact with each other. I am speechless.

At some points I try to make them pause to notice their feelings again. I do not want

to make the breaks too long afraid of interrupting their flow.

Significant moment 2

Speaking of flow a girl is mentioning in the end of the class how she finds the flow of the two classes so

different. For me this is a significant moment because I am interesting in creating the flow where you

forget about time and space. She says that she finds the first a bit staggered compared to the second

   

39

class where it was much more flow. I could not agree more with her and I find it interesting though

also annoying because I would have liked to create a technique class of flow. Nevertheless I think she is

right. At least the flow was really noticeable – almost touchable in the second class where the students

were so into the game that they forgot about time and space.

   

   

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Appendix 5 – Field Journal Wednesday

FIELD JOURNAL

WEDNESDAY THE 26TH OF MARCH 2014

COPENHAGEN CONTEMPORARY DANCE SCHOOL

TECHNIQUE CLASS 9.30-11.00

Today I am not nervous. I know I will make it through the day with an ok outcome. I

am just tired. I get tired when I think of the 4,5 hours I have to teach probably also

due to the fact that I myself am tired in my back because of a physiotherapy treatment

yesterday.

Dave is there when I arrive and I talk to him a bit in front of the studio. I enter the

studio and see a bunch of tired dancers lying on the floor. Actually there are only girls

today. They lie as a pile of bodies in the middle of the light room, James Blake is filling

the air with his nostalgic, melodramatic voice. I like this song.

Due to the atmosphere in the room I immediately decide to start slowly to try to make

them follow me and then “speed up” the class.

We gather in a circle and I ask if anyone has any comments from last time. Nobody

has. I start with guiding them to sit in a little ball and breath. I guide a little warm up

and teach them a nice-for-the-body warm up that I by mistake forgot on Monday. I let

them improvise over the material and do what they feel like and need this morning.

They all seem to enjoy it and engage in the exercise. It is like an ocean of movement

and a focused calmness descends on top of the room. It seems right and makes the

students and I relax I feel.

I have decided to change the order of the movements compared to Monday. We start

with the moving flat back in different directions and I ask them to follow the music in

their own individual way. Again an ocean of movement and arms are appearing in

front of my eyes. It is a beautiful scenario and I almost feel breath-taking.

   

41

Today I feel calmer inside myself and so I continue in a calm way with the whole

technical part. The girls seem to really engage today even though they seemed so tired

this morning. We also do some exercises in two groups to give more space and I

change the front a lot to get away from the mirrors. It works out nicely. Sometimes I

feel I loose some of them due to the maybe a bit slow tempo but I also know that I use

to stress through exercises so I decide to let the thought go and continue. After having

done a freer strengthening exercise across the floor where the girls decide the tempo

themselves I change to a happier feeling with the music – also just to change the

atmosphere. We start to jump. First small jumps in the centre then across the floor. It

is funny how it always makes people smile and laugh. I guess there is something to this

moving fast and the live drums that keep up the energy in a natural way. We jump

long and high. I make a little competition, which works out so great. I keep the

competition in a non-serious atmosphere to keep the motivational climate instead of

making it a serious competition that enhances a performance climate. I try to be very

aware of that since I believe to be able to work technically without creating a

performative atmosphere.

On top of this happy ending we take a break.

After fifteen minutes we continue to with the more creative hour of the day. I always

have my doubts when repeating games or exercises. Will the students be motivated

enough or are they getting bored? But I decide to stick to my plan and play the same

game as on Monday. The group seems to be just as engaged as last time. The move

around the things they have brought to the space in groups of two. They are being

really creative and also include themselves into the game. The space is filled with

bodies, things, movements, various body positions and so on. It is really interesting.

Today another sense is being brought into play. Someone brought lighters and stick

matches and start to lit them. The smell of something burned together with the music

really set the atmosphere for me. It seems like a performance and not just a game. I try

to make the students aware of the smells in the room. Later the smell of hairspray is

also being included in the game.

I make the students remember some of the routes they decide to do and make a little

phrase. Afterwards they are learning each other´s material with much enthusiasm and

   

42

I make them switch roles and do each others material instead of their own. I do not

know how I did it or why I chose to do it but it seems to work out and the girls are

being very aware of each other. I guess I just went with the flow. I tried not to stop

their flow of the game that they kind of created themselves with me just giving little

guidelines.

A lot of them seem to forget about time and space and that for me is the most

important right now because it is a sign of FLOW. It is a sign of that moment where

you just go with the flow and energy of a given situation and therefore have the best

possibilities of actually learning something from yourselves and people around you. At

least that is what this game seems to me at the moment.

Nevertheless the most interesting parts of today is hearing the students comments after

the technique class and the creative class.

A lot of them reflected on the creative class they had just been through and a girl

(Nicoline) said it was much easier to just say yes today knowing a bit more what the

game was about than on Monday.

Notes

I sensed a tired Wednesday vibe and decided to start more slow. From their comments

it benefit the whole situation.

Ellen: So tired. Normally either has to push herself into doing something or cannot be

bothered. Today she actually managed to work through the technique class the way

she wanted to. It felt good.

Catherine: Nice to change the direction in the room. Difficult to face away from the

mirror but interesting for her to try it and work facing away from the mirror.

Gry: The start of the class was just what the body needed.

Nicoline: Today she really took on the yes hat and was able to work through the

creative task compared to Monday where she did not really know what to do.

   

43

Sofia: I sense when a teacher is fearing. For her a lot of things about how she feels is

how the teacher is acting. She mentions a situation where the teacher told them just to

move like themselves but then when she did that teacher had asked her “what she was

doing?” The fear of that teacher had definitely affected Sofia and in some way it seems

like that situation had affected the relationship she had to teachers. What teachers are

saying and how they act affects her a lot and affects the way she is feeling.

Significant moment 1

On Monday I had this weird feeling about a girl in the class. She did not seem to bother about being in

the studio. She seemed out of focus and could not even concentrate to close her eyes just for a moment. I

took it really personally even though telling myself not to do that. Her behaviour could be affected by a

lot of different things. Personal, emotional, physical, tiredness or 100 other things in her head that I

had no clue about. Nevertheless it disturbed me quite a lot.

Today she sits out. I decide to ask the people sitting at the wall how they are feeling. They are all

injured and she is as well. She tells me she is feeling pain in her hip and it is probably after my class

on Monday. Again I feel this disturbing feeling in my body. How can she be so sure of that? But ok I

try to take it in and reflect on it and tell myself that it is ok that some bodies react to this kind of class

in a “bad way”.

After the class she stays in the room so I sit down and talk to her. She is suddenly really honest and

opens up a lot. She tells me that the pain in her hip does not necessarily have anything to do with my

class. I could have been something on the way and that it was just being provoked on Monday. Also

they had had 2 hours ballet on Monday so she was not sure where it came from.

We have a long and great talk about her thoughts on the future and how she has kind of lost her joy of

dancing. She tells me that she has decided not to apply for a professional education but try to find her

own road in dancing by visiting different dance environments around the world. She does not think

another education will make her a better dancer at the moment. I find her thoughts really mature and

she asks in-depth to my experiences and what I will do after my education. It all makes sense to me.

Her reaction and “attitude” is not a bad attitude in any way but her way of dealing with her

frustrations and thoughts about the future and her dancing. She does not only want to do technique

classes anymore but also wants just to dance. I am thinking that maybe her reaction in the hip could

also have got something to do with all these thoughts. It is interesting and I am really happy I got to

talk with her.

   

44

Right now my mind and body is totally blown. I feel dizzy after this day and almost

nortious. Thoughts are flying around in my head. I actually feel really sick. It is a

strange reaction and I am wondering if it has got anything to do with my teaching

practice. I have been so much “on” today. I have been teaching, talking to a lot of

different students about many of their thoughts. I have been recording and dealing

with live music. I am totally wasted like never before.

After my teaching I took a yoga class to make me focus. I do not know whether it was

a good or bad idea. All I know is that I am used, tired, empty in my whole body and

mind.

   

45

Appendix 6 – Field Journal Friday

FIELD JOURNAL

FRIDAY THE 28TH OF MARCH 2014

COPENHAGEN CONTEMPORARY DANCE SCHOOL

I am thinking a lot. I have just finished teaching practice and at the same time I feel

really happy on the outside; the sun is shining, I have gathered all my material and

now the interesting part is about to happen; the coding and analysing, the writing.

The putting together of the puzzle that I have created with the students. Also I feel

really overwhelmed and kind of sad on the inside. I cannot focus on my writing right

now. I feel I have put myself in a really vulnerable position as a teacher and I am

thinking how brave teachers in general are.

TECHNIQUE CLASS 9.30-11.00

I am a bit tired today but I have been up early running. It always makes me wake up.

I know that I am behind with my sleeping hours due to a late lecture I was holding

yesterday about something completely else. It is challenging to switch between being

the one having a lecture about your travelling one day to teaching dance the next day.

Standing here in front of the studio most of these thoughts disappears and I feel ready

to teach my final day of the practice research. The class seem more energized than

yesterday.

I start like I did Wednesday – we do some stretching, walking around the room, being

aware of each other, listening…

Significant moment 1

A guy walks out the door. I notice it straight away. I do not think he knows that I have seen it. I have

a feeling of him being really bored about this class. He wants to move. He is one of the wild horses;

like the teacher said the first day I was observing. So I kind of figured that he would feel this way. I

take a while to think whether to react on it or not. He was not here on Wednesday and in a way I feel

like just leaving him and concentrating on the group. On the other hand they are in an education and I

feel some kind of responsibility for them while being here. Starting up the group I then go outside the

door and asks if he is ok. He says that he is not feeling very well. That he has a headache. I feel bad

   

46

about myself because I do not believe him. But I decide to leave him and of course it can be that he is

not feeling very well or he is bored. I have my teaching to focus on for now.

Right now in the middle of this writing I am almost falling asleep. I am so much

behind. I have only been sleeping 9 hours the past two days and with all these

experiences my head is starting to get full.

I continue the class after having talked to the guy outside. We do the flat back exercise

that they now know and I let them interpret more freely as well as it seemed to work

out really nice on Wednesday. I have more focus on the quality of the movement

today

 

   

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Appendix 7 – Sample of free writings

SAMPLE OF FREE WRITINGS

   

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52

   

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Appendix 8 – Trinity Laban Webpage

TRINITY LABAN WEB SITE

http://www.trinitylaban.ac.uk/study/dance/dance-science

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