Latinas' Definitions of Sex and Sexual Relationships - CiteSeerX

10.1177/0739986303253803ARTICLEHispanic Journal of Behavioral SciencesFaulkner / Good Girl or Flirt Girl

Good Girl or Flirt Girl:Latinas’ Definitions ofSex and Sexual Relationships

Sandra L. FaulknerSyracuse University

This study provides theoretical understanding of 31 young adult Latinas’(Puerto Rican,Dominican, and Cuban) experiences and understandings of sexuality through in-depthinterviews. The grounded theory analysis of defining sex and sexual relationshipsrevealed similar descriptions of processes within Latinas’accounts. Women’s responsesincluded defining sex as intercourse, defining sex as virtually anything, and making dis-tinctions between sex and making love. Women also offered definitions of safer sex andtheir ideal sexual relationships. Ideas about men’s sexuality as uncontrollable ledwomen to devise plans for avoiding players and avoiding being a flirt girl because of thedesire to be seen as moral and culturally competent. Latinas made sense of their sexual-ity by accepting, altering, or rejecting cultural messages. The findings have implicationsfor interventions aimed to assist women in dealing with safer sex topics.

Keywords: cultural messages; grounded theory; Latinas; sexual definitions; sexual scripts

I know I don’t ask that sometimes before sex starts but afterwards—“Howmany partners have you had or whatever?”—but, definitely, I know before sexthat they’re gonna wear a condom. Like, if some guy is like, “I’m always tryingto go raw,” I’m, like, see you.

Puerto Rican, 20 years old, 7 to 10 sexual partners

Adolescents and young adults risk sexually transmitted infections (STIs).Reasons stem from feelings of invulnerability, inconsistent condom use, and

AUTHOR’S NOTE: This work is based on the author’s dissertation directed by Phyllis KernoffMansfield and Daniel J. Canary, completed at The Pennsylvania State University. Special thanksgo to Patricia Koch for careful and insightful suggestions on earlier versions of this manuscript.The author may be contacted at the Department of Speech Communication, 100 Sims Hall, Syra-cuse University, Syracuse, NY 13244-1230; phone: (315) 443-5142; e-mail: [email protected].

Hispanic Journal of Behavioral Sciences, Vol. 25 No. 2, May 2003 174-200DOI: 10.1177/0739986303253803© 2003 Sage Publications

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being covert about sexual behavior to the lack of appropriate and detailedsexual information (Warren, Santelli, Everett, & Kann, 1998). Sixty-threepercent of all STIs in the United States occur in people younger than 25 yearsof age (Ehrhardt, Yingling, & Warne, 1991), and every year 3 million teensacquire an STI (Alan Guttmacher Institute, 1999). Behavior and attitudesacquired during the teen years may influence young adults’sexuality, and thishas implications for sexual health, including HIV infection.

Ethnicity constitutes a significant risk factor for HIV. In the United States,cumulative incidence rates of HIV infection are 7 times greater for Latinascompared to White women (Smith & Moore, 1996), and in 1999, the AIDSincidence rate for Hispanics was almost 3 times higher than for Whites (Cen-ters for Disease Control, 2000). Compared to other Latino ethnic groups,Puerto Ricans, in particular, have been greatly affected by AIDS. Forinstance, between 1981 and 1987 in New York City, the AIDS rate for PuertoRican adult women was 59 out of 100,000 versus 25 out of 100,000 for otherLatinos (Menendez et al., 1990).

Latinas’high risk of HIV infection can be attributed to factors such as mis-conceptions about how one acquires HIV, underestimating personal risk ofacquiring STIs, and socioeconomic, cultural, and psychological factors(Fernandez, 1995; Kalichman, Hunter, & Kelly, 1992). Some research sug-gests that less acculturated Latinas with traditional values are more at riskfrom sexual behavior because of lower knowledge of HIV and uninformedbeliefs about condoms (Marin & Marin, 1990; Marin, Tschann, Gomez, &Kegeles, 1993). Hines and Caetano (1998) found less acculturated Latinas tobe 5 times more likely than more acculturated Latinas to indicate inconsistentcondom use and nonmonogamy (i.e., sex with someone other than a primarypartner). However, other research indicates that more acculturated Latinasare more likely to report multiple sex partners (Sabogal, Faigeles, &Cantania, 1993). The extent to which these cultural values influence sexualbehavior and ideas warrant further investigation.

The purpose of this research is to improve our understanding of young adultLatinas’ sexuality by exploring the meanings they attribute to sexuality—inparticular, definitions of sex and safer sex. Because Hispanics do not consti-tute a homogenous group, researchers need to be cognizant of subgroups(Marin & Marin, 1991). The focus of this study is on Puerto Rican, Cuban,and Dominican American women because culturally, these groups are con-sidered to share many commonalties when compared to other Hispanicgroups (e.g., Mexican Americans), and more research is needed to determinethe extent of subgroup differences.

Faulkner / Good Girl or Flirt Girl 175



Sexuality and Latinas

How a woman makes sense of herself as a sexual person depends in part onhow others in her social world label her sexual behavior and expression.Women’s sexual self-constructions are formed through consideration of mes-sages they receive from their culture and significant others about their bodies,reproductive functioning, and intimate relationships (Daniluk, 1998). In anethnographic study of college women, Dunn (1998) found that cultural ideasregarding college romantic relationships as sexual, men’s views of relation-ships in sexual terms, and a sexualized environment influenced women’sconceptions of their sexuality; the women negotiated their identity given stig-matized definitions of virgins and sluts and the pressure to be sexually active.Women’s negotiations of messages determined how they choose to be sexual(e.g., choosing to be sexual only within the context of a committed relation-ship). The messages these women received are not unique to college women:Be sexual but not too sexual, wait for men to turn on sexual feelings, and besexy but not too sexy are messages that embody much of the sexual edictsother women receive. However, the distinctiveness of these and other culturalmessages plays out in subgroup differences and how individual women resistor embrace such messages (Irvine, 1995). For example, a 20-year-old Mexi-can American in Dunn’s (1998) study expressed amazement that her friendsbroke up with men who would not be sexual with them. She was still a virginand felt that women and men should have different sexual standards.

Although most women contend with gender roles and the generaldisempowerment of women (Gomez & Marin, 1996), Latinas in the UnitedStates must make sense of mainstream Anglo and traditional Latino mes-sages regarding appropriate sexual behavior that are often contradictory.Some core cultural ideals and edicts exist for Latinas, even though they repre-sent a diverse range of backgrounds and racial and ethnic categories (Marin &Marin, 1991). Marianismo and machismo, for instance, prescribe appropri-ate traditional gender roles of feminine and masculine behavior, includingsexual behavior (Gil & Vazquez, 1996). Modesty, faithfulness, and virginityrepresent feminine ideals. Marianismo dictates that women, who talk aboutsex, act like they enjoy sex, and initiate condom use may be considered pro-miscuous and lacking virtue. This role requires women to be monogamousand experience sexual desire only in the context of a long-term committedrelationship with a man, limiting exploration of erotic identity and forcingheterosexuality as the norm; lesbians and sexually active women face the riskof being labeled whores and unfit for the esteemed role of motherhood(Gomez & Marin, 1996).

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Traditional machismo sexual behavior includes having multiple sexualpartners, being in charge of the frequency and type of sexual activity, and nottalking about sex with women (Marin, Gomez, & Hearst, 1993). Althoughthe idea of machismo is changing, suggesting that the meanings of macho aremultiple and mutable (Gutmann, 1996), gender stereotypes still exist and arereinforced by those inside and outside the culture (Burgos & Diaz-Perez,1986). An ethnographic study of Puerto Rican men (18 to 29 years old) inNew York City revealed men’s experiences of tension between emotional andsexual intimacy and pressure to adhere to traditionally prescribed genderroles (Seal, Wagner-Raphael, & Ehrhardt, 2000). Participants talked aboutsexually scripted ideas of relational and sexual control, including being incharge of initiating sexual activity, stealing other men’s women, the idea thatmen need sex, and respecting virgins and women who make men wait to havesex. Men also described feeling distrusting about female-initiated condomuse. On the whole, Latin men are taught to express their sexuality and areconsidered oversexed, whereas Latin women are taught to repress their sexu-ality and rely on men to teach them about sex in the context of marriage (Gil &Vazquez, 1996).

Even if Latinas do not endorse traditional values, these cultural ideasinfluence their relationships with male sexual partners (Gomez & Marin,1996). Research from the University of Puerto Rico showed that traditionalexpressions of sexuality, rigid sexual behavior norms, and gender roles existon the island (Cunningham, 1998). Interviews with 20 married women inPuerto Rico revealed that women’s sexual expression was constrained by tra-ditional ideology: sex for reproduction only, women’s sexuality as passive,and virginity before marriage. None of the working-class women inter-viewed discussed sexual issues with their husbands, they felt ignorant aboutsexual matters when growing up, and they did not report enjoying sexualintercourse as much as the managers that were interviewed (Santos-Ortiz &Vazquez, 1989). A study of young adolescents in Puerto Rico confirms thatgender differentiation still exists, suggesting that “girls and boys equallyexposed to United States values may react differently because they filterthese new values with gender-specific ones” (Gibbons, Brusi-Figueroa, &Fisher, 1997, p. 366). These research findings indicated that the degree ofadherence to cultural norms depends on factors such as education, accultura-tion, and economic independence. Movement between the island and theU.S. mainland creates pressure for acculturation and preservation of tradi-tional values.




Virginity and Sexual Definitions

In the United States today, the terms virginity and sex have many diversemeanings that coexist (Carpenter, 2001). What constitutes having sex is notuniversal as different cultural groups and individuals attach various mean-ings to sexual activity and virginity. In a survey of 559 undergraduates, 59%believed that oral-genital contact with a partner did not count as having hadsex (Sanders & Reinisch, 1999). If oral sexual behavior does not end inorgasm, it may be even less likely the behavior is considered to be sex(Bogart, Cecil, Wagstaff, Pinkerton, & Abramson, 2000). Even though thereis a lack of consensus, most scholarly and lay literature denotes virginity lossas first coitus (Carpenter, 2001). This ignores and glosses over the meaningsame-sex couples and others attribute to noncoital sexual activity, anal sex,and oral sex.

For some women, the loss of virginity means to give up something ofvalue and to lose power after experiencing vaginal intercourse (Daniluk,1998), whereas for others, virginity is a stigma, something to be rid of to gainpopularity or end the mystery (see Thompson, 1995). Views of virginity ashonorable or stigmatized depend on cultural and individual values, such asreligiosity and beliefs about gender roles. Generally, for men, the loss of vir-ginity represents a passageway to manhood and a way to win status. “Hetero-sexual first sex” represents young men’s induction into adult masculinity,but, for women, the story is more ambiguous because of the constructionof adult heterosexuality as masculinity (Holland, Ramazanoglu, &Thomson, 1996). This leaves women with pressure to consent to and then fitinto this construction, “making sense of themselves and their otherness”(p. 145).

For Latinas, preserving virginity is a matter of honor for the Latino family(Gil & Vazquez, 1996). Loss of virginity casts a shadow on male partners anda woman’s family; it is not an individual identity. A man who marries anonvirgin may be considered a “cuckold” because of public evaluations of anonvirgin woman as less valuable (Horowitz, 1983). Men’s status improvesafter sexual intercourse because they are seen as able to successfully seducewomen, whereas women are viewed as unbounded by this display of passion.Wishes to uphold cultural ideas of goodness keep women balancing needs forsexual contact, freedom, and social approval. All of the stories that 20 PuertoRican women in Chicago told Peterman (1996) about their abortions cen-tered on a traditional patriarchal idea of virginity; stories included themes ofsexual shame, marriage to legitimate pregnancy, and marriage to a first sexualpartner. In some cases, becoming a so-called good mother or limiting sex to




activities other than vaginal intercourse are ways to cope with the stigma ofvirginity loss and engender evaluations of morality.

Script Theory

Script theory offers a promising framework from which to examine defini-tions of sex and safer sex. Sexual scripts (e.g., marianismo and machismo)are abstractions about sexuality that specify appropriate sexual goals andcontexts as well as provide a pattern of behavior and plans to achieve sexualgoals (Simon & Gagnon, 1986, 1987). A scripting perspective allowsresearchers to examine how sociocultural contexts influence what peoplethink and do (Gagnon, 1990). Consciously or unconsciously, individualstend to rely on scripts to tell them how to behave sexually and even what situ-ations are sexual (Simon & Gagnon, 1987). In short, scripts define behaviorsthat correspond with a culture’s expectations about what happens when,where, how, why, and by whom.

Scripts interact at the cultural, interpersonal, and intrapsychic level(Simon & Gagnon, 1986, 1987) and are considered metaphors “for conceptu-alizing the production of behavior within social life” (Simon & Gagnon,1986). The cultural-level script refers to instructions for sexual conductembodied in cultural narratives. Schools, religious leaders, sex educators,and mass media are sources that help create and maintain guidelines andsocial norms for appropriate sexual conduct. Interpersonal-level scripts ref-erence one’s structured patterns of interaction, that is, what sexual behaviorsan individual acquires and maintains during sexual interactions. Finally, theintrapsychic-level script speaks to an individual’s feelings and fantasiesabout sexual activity. A person uses these feelings and fantasies to reflect onpast behavior and to guide current and future behavior. These levels are notstatic; rather, they interact with and relate to one another depending on one’sculture and life course (Gagnon, 1990). Multiple and conflicting scripts canexist in a given culture. For Latinas, for instance, feminine sexual gendernorms require virginity and also male domination; women are placed in aposition of choosing which norm to violate (see Horowitz, 1983).

We need to understand Latinas’subjective meanings of sexuality and howtheir culture may influence these understandings, particularly because of pre-vious tendencies to ignore ethnicity and intraethnic variations as well asassumptions that White women’s experience is the same as others(Wiederman, Maynard, & Fretz, 1996). An examination of subgroups pro-vides understanding of how “gaps between the dominant cultural messagesand an individual’s socialization into it” (Irvine, 1995, p. 28) play out inLatinas’ construction of sexual identity.




Method

The grounded theory method was selected because of its focus on processand its ability to generate explanatory theory based in Latinas’ experiences(Glaser, 1978; Glaser & Strauss, 1967). The results presented here are part ofa larger project focusing on the analysis of three contexts—defining sex andsexual relationships, communicating about sex with family and community,and being in a romantic relationship—that revealed similar descriptions ofprocesses within Latinas’ accounts (Faulkner, 1999). Findings from thegrounded theory analysis of defining sex and sexual relationships are pre-sented here.

Participants

The participants in this study were 31 young adult Latinas who had beenor were currently involved in a romantic or sexual relationship. Twenty-sixparticipants were Puerto Rican (84%), 3 were Dominican (10%), and 2 wereCuban (6%). The participants were highly educated; all participants hadreceived or were working toward an undergraduate degree, and 7 women hador were pursuing graduate degrees. Most (65%, n = 11) predominantly grewup in the Northeast, some (29%, n = 9) in Puerto Rico, and 2 (6%) lived inboth areas. All were U.S. citizens. The women’s levels of acculturation var-ied, but most women were fairly well acculturated (i.e., women predomi-nantly preferred speaking English, had Latino and non-Latino close friends,and talked about being proud of being Latin and from the United States). Theparticipants’ ages ranged from 18 to 36 (M = 23). Of the women, 24 reportedbeing heterosexual (77%), 2 bisexual (6%), 1 lesbian (3%), and 4 (13%) wereunsure of their sexual orientation. Of participants, 84% were single, and ofthose women, 54% were dating someone at the time of the interview. Fiveparticipants were married (16%), and only 1 participant had children (1%).

The majority of participants had experience with vaginal and oral inter-course. Of participants, 74% reported having had sexual intercourse, 94% ofparticipants performed oral sex, and 97% reported having received oral sexfrom a partner. Of participants, 39% reported having had 1 to 3 lifetime sex-ual partners, 16% had 4 to 6, 23% had 7 to 10, and 13% of participantsreported having had 11 to 20 sexual partners. Catholic and Pentecostal werethe most common religions represented among the participants, althoughsome women were Protestant. A few women mentioned Santeria, a tradi-tional island religion, as playing a role in their spirituality, even if they prac-ticed other religions.




Procedures

This study was conducted in Pennsylvania, New York, and New Jerseyduring 1997 and 1998. Contacts in the Latino community helped me recruitparticipants for the study. I also recruited participants though a Puerto Ricanstudent association, a Latina sorority, and a center for Latino culture and arts.I attended events and functions in the community (e.g., parties and educa-tional programs) to establish my presence and gain participants’ confidence(Marin & Marin, 1991).

Thirty-one Latinas were interviewed (including pilot interviews), withrecruitment ceasing when saturation was reached (Glaser, 1978). To ensurevalidity, I did purposive sampling where I sought participants who possesseda range of sexual communication experiences, who were willing to discusstheir experiences, and who had reflected on them (Morse, 1992). At thebeginning of each interview, confidentiality was ensured and informed con-sent was obtained. Participants received $10 in compensation. The inter-views ranged in length from 30 min to 120 min with the majority lasting45 min to 50 min.

An interview guide, which was piloted with six college-aged Latinas, pro-vided a framework for developing and sequencing questions and helped medetermine what information to pursue in more detail. The interview scheduleprovided a flexible yet focused sequence of questions (Rubin & Rubin,1995). Probes were prepared for each question to elicit further information ifneeded, and the interview protocol was refined three times to reflect theemerging theory and insights as the interviews were conducted. Questionsabout family, partners, religion, whether and how safer sex is discussed, defi-nitions of sex, abortion, HIV testing, and negotiating sexual activity werecovered. Married participants were asked to consider past romantic relation-ships as well when answering questions. After the interviews, each partici-pant completed a brief two-page questionnaire that contained both factualand sensitive questions (e.g., present sexual activity, number of sexual part-ners, and contraceptive use). The results were used to provide demographicand descriptive information about the participants.

Data Analysis

The interview audiotapes were transcribed, and computer files were madeof the data. Each interview received a code number, and responses to eachquestion were given subheads (e.g., Q1, Q2a) to facilitate categorization ofresponses. A computer word-processing program assisted in managing thecoding process (see Morse, 1991).




Grounded theory was used to identify and describe the process of sexualtalk (Glaser, 1978; Glaser & Strauss, 1967). The analysis process began withopen coding. As analysis moved to a more abstract level, selective codingoccurred; first-level codes were condensed and recategorized. In addition toselective coding, theoretical coding yielded conceptual relationshipsbetween the categories (Glaser, 1978). Theoretical memos, made after eachinterview and during analysis, contained ideas about codes and the relation-ships between them that moved analysis from the descriptive stage to a moretheoretical one and included personal reflections (Glaser, 1978). Personalreflections were compared to the categories that were emerging and con-firmed findings during analysis with another experienced researcher whoasked questions about the categories to help refine them.

Findings

Overall, I found that participants could be classified into three groupsdepending on how they processed cultural messages they received about sex-uality. Latinas described rejecting, accepting, or altering messages about sex-ual women (for a full discussion, see Faulkner & Mansfield, 2002). Womenwho rejected messages tended to be nontraditional. They thought women’sroles encompassed more than motherhood and relational partner andexpressed beliefs in women’s rights to sexual experience. Over time, thesewomen considered so-called “old-school” messages about virginity and sex-ual promiscuity as less defining of their identities. They claimed the right tobe sexual even if they delayed marriage plans. These Latinas expressed angerat sexism, lack of sexuality information, being labeled a certain kind of sex-ual person (e.g., lesbian, feminist), and being called derogatory names. “It’seasy to say ‘don’t have sex.’ . . . How are you gonna make sure that your inter-est is protected? . . . And that’s what we need, plenty of opportunity to exploresome things without feeling guilty that we are going to be called sluts”(Puerto Rican, age 30, married).

A second group of women altered and adjusted messages to fit with theirown emerging beliefs about appropriate sexual behavior. They adopted someparts of the messages and discarded and rearranged other parts, for instance,women who described making distinctions between sex for society (i.e.,intercourse) and sex for church (i.e., any sexual activity). “There is one thingfor the church and for society. We love each other and we haven’t done any-thing with anybody else. So, we know that it’s wrong for church. We know it’sOK because we love each other” (Puerto Rican, age 21, 1 sexual partner).Latinas described altering messages as a process of feeling good about them-




selves and learning from past mistakes as well as positive experiences. Manyfelt remorse about past sexual activity and labeled themselves as sluts, butthey considered the experience necessary to be assertive with their sexualneeds in present and future relationships.

For other women, accepting messages felt appropriate for them. Theseñoritas (virgins) avoided sexual activity and attempted to stay in control oftheir partners’ and their own sexual desires. They felt that saving yourselfuntil marriage was honorable and believed that women’s and men’s genderroles were naturally different. Explicit talk about sexual issues was not neces-sary because that would occur after marriage. Those women who engaged insexual behavior also reported being quiet because of their own and others’evaluations of their behavior as wrong. How Latinas accepted or rejected cul-turally scripted messages about sexuality was reflected in their definitions ofsex, safer sex, and ideal sexual relationships and could change as reconcilingcultural messages is a process.

Defining Sex

Emotions and contexts affected participants’definitions of sex. The mean-ing of sexual activity depended in part on what kinds of activity women hadengaged in, as well as what activities they considered to possess eroticpotential.

Sex as Intercourse

Participants almost always mentioned intercourse or “penis and vagina”when defining sex. As a 19-year-old Puerto Rican said, “To me, like, sexalways entails vaginal-penile intercourse.” A lesbian explicitly stated she didnot define sex “by the penis.” The majority of women, though, mentionedintercourse first when they defined sex and said it was the most readily acces-sible definition. “The first thing that comes to my mind is intercourse, sexualpenetration” (Puerto Rican, heterosexual, age 21).

Most of the participants did not volunteer oral activity as a definition ofsex until I explicitly asked them if it counted. One woman (Puerto Rican,married, age 26) discussed how the Monica Lewinsky-President Clintonaffair altered her thinking on the subject of oral sex as constituting “havingsex.” She talked to friends about the level of intimacy involved in oral-genitalcontact after the affair became public and concluded that oral sex did meanhaving sex.

All but 1 woman had received oral sex, and only 2 women had never per-formed oral sex on a partner. Oral sex, though, may or may not be sex. Almost




half of the participants did not consider oral sex to count as having sex, partic-ularly many women who reported not engaging in vaginal or anal sex. Theseparticipants remained adamant about their status as virgins as sex was, aboveall, vaginal intercourse. About 5 participants recognized the contradictionduring the interview but made distinctions about sex as viewed by generalsociety versus the church. A 20-year-old Puerto Rican participant felt that “Ifyou kiss someone, not kiss like (sound) but kiss someone long, that’s sex forchurch. For society, sex would be having intercourse and what they say, ‘go-ing all the way.’ ” She talked about how she and her boyfriend “did everythingbut” intercourse because they wanted to save that for marriage. The defini-tions of sex depended on whether women examined the definition from a reli-gious or social perspective.

Sex as Virtually Anything

About one third of all participants defined sex as virtually anything anddid not make clear distinctions between sexual activities. To them, vaginalintercourse, oral sex, massaging, handholding, kissing, flirting, and caress-ing could constitute sexual activity. The demarcation of some activities assexual and others as not sexual seemed false. Sex was open to interpretationdepending on many factors, such as who you were partnered with, who initi-ated sexual encounters, where and when sexual encounters began, what youfelt like during an activity, and why activities occurred. Circumstances sur-rounding activities with partners determine the labeling of an event as sexual.For instance, a Puerto Rican participant (21 years old, 1 to 3 lifetime sexualpartners) said, “I think people can be in bed all night making out, you know,touching, caressing each other, and that can be sex.” Four participants whoseemed very traditional felt that any kind of intimacy was sexual, even kissesshould not be “given away.”

An anal sex taboo was clearly present for the women. They would notreadily volunteer anal intercourse when defining sex. Only 16% (n = 5) ofwomen indicated that they had experienced anal sex, although they reportedengaging in it rarely to occasionally. Two participants provided no answer tothe question. Many did consider anal intercourse to be sex but made sure tosay they personally found it repulsive. Some of these feelings had to do withthe association with homosexuality. A 22-year-old heterosexual PuertoRican participant stated it this way: “I guess in a homosexual relationship, it’slike your only one of limited options. So, I can understand why, I mean ifsomebody wants to do it, that’s fine. But personally that is a repulsive act.”




Sex as Different From Making Love

Participants made clear distinctions between sex and making love. Sexsolely involved body parts, whereas making love was regarded as the idealbecause it involved feelings and a relationship with a partner. Making loveinvolves passion, romance, and feelings, and “there doesn’t have to be pene-tration and liquid involved” because it extends beyond the physical. The dif-ference between sex and making love exists in the length of the relationshipand the setting of the activity. Making love takes place in a committed inti-mate relationship that has been established over time and in which feelingsdevelop.

Three women did not conceive of sex as making love and viewed it as apurely physical relationship. For these women, sex was “not a big deal.” Theyhad divorced sex and emotion entirely, making no connection between thetwo concepts. One woman (Puerto Rican, bisexual, age 21) who reported 7 to10 lifetime sexual partners relayed how her counselors went “wild” when shetold them her views about sex. She had been molested as a child and had notfully recovered from the experience. Consequently, she considered sex as just“physical” and “dirty.”

If you think about it, like, technically, why would you do this to someone youlove? It’s nice to be in love with someone and have sex with someone. But youcould be dirty, too. You don’t have to be always like this wonderful, like, pro-creating marriage thing.

Another woman had never experienced sex in a loving relationship, so shepondered the importance that so many people placed on it: “I think sex is sex.I’m sure there’s something deeper, but I have never really had sex with some-one I love. I don’t think of it as some big huge ordeal where two people areexchanging all these emotions” (Puerto Rican, age 20).

Women disliked the term intercourse because it sounded “dry” and unro-mantic. They felt the word was too scientific to describe their feelings aboutsex and, in fact, some refused to say that intercourse was sex for this reason.Sex, to them encompassed more than this term. Making love, on the otherhand, was a “beautiful body and soul experience,” and the “most deep” expe-rience you can share with another person. A 21-year-old Puerto Rican whohad planned her first intercourse with her current partner stated, “I think[making love] that’s more like intimacy, where your emotions are involved.You have a certain feeling for the person. As opposed to sex, it’s like inter-course sounds dry.” Making love did not equal procreation for any of thewomen, even those who were deeply religious.




In addition to personal feelings, about half of the women discussed reli-gious distinctions between sex and making love. Women who consideredthemselves deeply religious felt that making love belonged within the con-fines of a heterosexual marital relationship and was the highest form of love.Premarital sex, however, equaled fornication, which is a sin. Seven womenwho decided to maintain their virginity (señoritas), including 3 of the now-married, cited not meeting the right person and being unready emotionally(n = 2), as well as strong beliefs in church teachings about premarital sex (n =5). A 20-year-old Puerto Rican woman who grew up on the island describedhow her deep religious convictions kept her from even believing in the con-cept of sex. She considered herself to be a virgin.

I guess I don’t believe in sex. I believe in making love. It’s [sex] totally drivenbehavior from your flesh, period, from selfish personal desires. You just wantto have some satisfaction; you just want somebody to have sex [with].

Defining Safer Sex

Smart Sex

Overall, Latinas felt safer sex was “smart sex.” Smart sex meant avoidingpregnancy and disease as well as the care of one’s emotional well-beingthrough the choice of trustworthy partners. Participants possessed rudimen-tary knowledge about safer sex, especially that barriers (i.e., condoms)should be used to prevent the exchange of bodily fluids to mucous mem-branes and/or broken skin. About one third of the women possessed more in-depth knowledge detailing the need to use condoms and/or dental dams fororal sex and latex gloves for manual genital stimulation with a woman. Aminority of others did not possess sufficient knowledge about their bodies,sexual functioning, and methods of birth control to talk about or acquire con-traception. Those (n = 6) who indicated they were “virgins” (señoritas)because they wanted to wait until marriage for intercourse did not discusscontraception or condoms because they believed them to be unnecessary,even if they were engaging in oral sex with a partner. Only 1 woman (PuertoRican, 20 years old) mentioned positive feelings about safer sex anddescribed it as a “sexy way of having sex.” She volunteered as an AIDS edu-cator in her community. No one else viewed erotic potential in the use of bar-riers, although they did view them as a way partners care for one another andshow respect.




Avoiding Disease and Pregnancy

Pregnancy and STIs as consequences of sexual activity resided in promi-nent places in women’s minds when they talked about their definitions ofsafer sex. Avoiding these consequences was accomplished by “protectingyourself and your partner” by “using protection” and “taking precautions” inaddition to “taking care of yourself.” Protection referred to condoms for dis-ease protection for two thirds of the participants and other contraception,most often “the pill,” to prevent pregnancy. Although women generally knewabout the importance of disease and pregnancy prevention, one third wereshaky about the details of their reproductive systems and how contraceptionworked.

At times, the actual practice of safer sex contrasted with women’s knowl-edge about it. When asked whether they practiced safer sex, participants dis-cussed the difficulty of always using condoms with partners because ofattitudes about them; some women felt condoms reduced closeness betweenpartners, some were embarrassed to buy them, and others had to contend witha partner’s condom-negative views. Three women discussed how they onlyrecently found out about the necessity of condoms for oral sex. Womenreported using oral contraception (n = 10) and condoms (n = 14) as means toprevent pregnancy most frequently. Six women used condoms in conjunctionwith oral contraception or spermicide for sexual health reasons, and 4 womenreported they relied on the rhythm method. Only 1 woman indicated usingcontraceptive film.

Not one woman reported using condoms consistently, even if that was heronly method of birth control. Reasons for inconsistent condom use includedthe feeling of “something new,” being bored, wanting to be “spontaneous,”trusting a partner, and hating condoms. Partners influenced the use of con-doms. About half of the women felt it would not be an issue to use a condomwith a partner. They believed that men would do anything to have sex, andthey could choose men who would use condoms. However, a few women (n = 5)expressed that they could not get partners to use condoms, particularly if thecouple had used them inconsistently in the past. If a partner disliked con-doms, then a woman often had to decide to have sexual intercourse without acondom or forgo it all together. Unfortunately, disagreements usuallyresulted in reliance on withdrawal or “pullout.”

Trusting a partner was the reason most often cited for “going raw.” Womenfelt that they could trust the men for numerous reasons. These includedassuming that he was not sleeping with other people, that the sexual relation-ship was a first for both of them, and that the commitment level of the rela-




tionship was high. When women stopped trusting a partner and suspectedinfidelity, they often requested that condoms be used again. A 21-year-oldPuerto Rican participant told her boyfriend that he had to use condoms aftershe found out that he had intercourse with another woman. Other triggersbesides suspicion of infidelity included seeing a program about sex on televi-sion or talking with friends about sexual issues.

Women felt that knowing a partner’s sexual history constituted anotherimportant strategy for preventing disease and meant in some cases they couldforgo condoms (e.g., if partner was sexually inexperienced). A large part of“being careful” included knowing your partner. Women would determinerisk by asking others in their social circle about a potential partner andobserving whether the man was a “player” (i.e., someone who dates a lot ofpeople). Less often they would ask the person about his or her past. Onewoman described how she avoided performing oral sex on a woman she didnot know very well as a safety measure (Cuban, lesbian, age 25).

In addition to safer sex, HIV testing is another safety strategy in which onecan engage. The number of women who reported being tested (n = 16) or nottested (n = 15) was approximately equivalent. Reasons for not being testedstemmed from feelings of safety (e.g., virginity, only experiencing oral sex,being married) to acute fear. Women who reported being tested for HIV listedreasons such as curiosity, desire to stop using condoms, being exposed topublic service announcements or AIDS awareness education workers, andpast sexual experience.

Sex was “scary” for women, many because of all the things that could gowrong. Even if participants did not express fear, most of them discussed neg-ative consequences of sexual activity (e.g., sexually transmitted diseases,pregnancy). A 22-year-old bisexual participant who reported 7 to 10 lifetimesexual partners cited her negative experiences of breakage and slippage withcondoms as a reason to fear sex. Oral sex is something that her partnersalways forgot about, she bemoaned; they felt “all safe,” but did not use con-doms or dental dams for oral sex with previous partners. Another participant(age 23, Puerto Rican, 4 to 6 sexual partners) offered her view on how safersex is “fear inside” and that “as long as I have that fear inside of me, that’s safesex. I won’t have sex if I have fear.”

Taking Care of the Emotional Self

“Safe sex is making sure the car doors are locked,” one woman (PuertoRican, 11 to 20 sexual partners, age 22) quipped. She continued on a moresomber note, however, and earnestly stated that safer sex entailed being with




someone you trust emotionally as well as the “physical stuff.” Keeping thecar doors locked is not effective if you do not have a healthy relationship andmake choices that jeopardize your emotional safety. Eight women echoedthis theme by emphasizing the importance of choosing good partners.

Emotional health meant being honest with yourself and knowing whenyou were in an unhealthy, “horrible” relationship and getting out. Healthyrelationships were monogamous and full of trust. Almost half of participantsfelt that trust was the key to safer sex; therefore, they placed great value onknowing a partner and building up trust to ensure the relationship’s future andhow a partner treated them. Women described trust as contributing to the abil-ity to talk about sexual issues and being sure that a partner was not lying aboutfidelity, thus ensuring emotional and physical health.

If you’re like with a lot of partners at the same time, then you have to protectyourself from diseases. But if you’re only with one partner . . . you’re only withthat partner and you really trust that partner, I don’t think condoms or otherprotections are going to be useful. (Puerto Rican, age 20, 1 to 3 sexual partners)

Trust meant that condoms could be forgone; using condoms in an establishedrelationship indicated multiple partners. Two women discussed how theystopped using condoms when trust was established in their relationships, and3 women did not use condoms for their first intercourse because their partnerswere also virgins.

Describing Sexual Roles

Meanings attributed to sexuality influenced women’s attitudes and experi-ences in the sexual realm. Traditional attitudes construed men as “players”after “only one thing.” Women were warned about the nature of men’s sexual-ity by their family and friends, particularly male friends, older women, andwomen who had experienced sexual violence, and told to be careful lest theybecome a “flirt girl” (e.g., whore) for giving in to men’s uncontrollabledesire. Some women were told “never depend on a man” because they wereuntrustworthy.

Women reported clear preferences for dating Latinos (n = 19) or non-Latinos (n = 12) based on their ideas of how Latinos treated women. Partici-pants preferring non-Latinos argued adamantly that Latinos “had no clue”about women and considered women to not “have sexuality.” These womencontended that traditional gender roles in the Latin community were toostrong for them to want to date a Latino. A man could be sensitive and respon-sible if he eschewed traditional sex role expectations, yet such resistance car-




ried a stigma. A Latino viewed as too effeminate paid with consequencessuch as being ostracized and labeled; a man who allowed a woman to “domi-nate” him became a “girl.” Other women preferred outgoing men and consid-ered shy men (i.e., nontraditional) unappealing. Four participants feltpressure from their families to date White men, or at least light-skinned Lati-nos because of a belief that White men make better husbands.

Men Direct Sex

Women who endorsed traditional values assumed that men orchestratedsex. Men lead the way in the sexual arena by knowing what to do sexually andinitiating sexual activity. A 20-year-old Puerto Rican said that many peoplein the Latin community still believe that “The man directs the sex. The mandirects what goes on, and there shouldn’t even be any discussion about it.That’s it. Like I said, what the man says goes.” Duties include teaching awoman about sex once they are married.

Men as Players

Most participants thought men’s and women’s sexuality differed, even theones who altered traditional messages. The view of men as “sexually driven”and knowledgeable about sexuality led to expectations that they should expe-rience sexual activity with a variety of women before marriage. However,they are encouraged to marry a “pure” woman. “You don’t want someoneanother guy had” (Puerto Rican, 7 to 10 sexual partners, age 21). Threewomen explained that men’s previous sexual experience would keep the manfrom “straying” when they got married because he had a chance “to get it outof his system.” Moreover, men are expected to have affairs because of theirhuge sexual appetites.

The view of men as sexual carnivores meant that they had a difficult timedistinguishing between sex and intimacy, according to some Latinas (n = 4).“Like, men kind of don’t understand the whole [idea of] how you could beintimate but not have actual intercourse. So that’s something that I’ve had tosit down and deal with” (Puerto Rican, uncertain of sexual orientation, age20). She continued by describing how she negotiated in her last dating rela-tionship with a man who wanted to get his “million” though intercourse. “Hewas like, why have ten-thousand dollars, when I want a million? I went ‘no.’You go ahead and get your 1 million dollars, and I’m going to take my ten-thousand-dollar ass home.”




Avoiding Players

Latinas wanted to avoid being with players. A player sleeps around withnumerous women, disrespects women, does not make commitments in rela-tionships, and perpetually thinks about and pressures women to have sex.One participant felt that a player did not necessarily sleep with a lot ofwomen, but he would date around and never stay with one woman very long.

The “good girl.” Women raised in more traditional families and those whogrew up in Puerto Rico experienced a tight rein on their dating activities. Par-ents tried to screen out players. This meant supervised visits with men; it wascommon for a mother to send a sibling along with a woman on a date. An 18-year-old virgin who grew up in Puerto Rico described how her parents made aman write her letters before she could even talk to him on the phone. Then, hewas allowed to make phone calls at specified times, and after another periodof time, they supervised visits to the house. Finally, the two were allowed todate unattended. Her parents wanted to make sure his intentions were worthy,that he was not a player. A player would not go through the hassle and obsta-cles her parents placed before him.

The most common method of avoiding players was asking others aboutthe person in question. Women would query those in their social circle abouta person’s propensity toward “playing.” Ascertaining the answer seemedeffortless as the potential partner pool for women in college was fairly limitedto those whom their friends knew or someone with whom their friends had atleast minimal contact. This 23-year-old Dominican (virgin) participantdescribed it this way:

Like one of my friends that I talk to now, he knows my brother. . . . I used to likeone of his friends, and I be like, “How is he? Is he, is he like a player or thingslike that?” “Well, actually, we used to compete on how many girls we would geta night.” And I asked him about his friend, and he was like, “Well, he’s aplayer.”

The Flirt Girl

Analogous to a player, a flirt girl, according to a 20-year-old Puerto Ricanparticipant, represents the unmarried woman who is free and open about hersexual desires; she accepts “straight-out” invitations for sex from men, has“sex when she can,” sleeps and dates around, and “allows her man to be withother women.” Most of the women who grew up in Puerto Rico felt thatwomen raised in the United States were too free with their sexuality. As one




woman emphasized, “From where I come, Puerto Rico, girls are like very dif-ferent than here. We let guys beg for us. We’re not easy.” Her narrative of thediscovery of her boyfriend’s infidelity illustrates the idea of a flirt girl.

I told him that there is only one thing I wanna tell you. I’m not going to be oneof your flirt girls. I’m not like that, you know. If you really like me, it’s me ornobody. If you like them, it’s them or not me. So, you choose. I don’t need you.I was born alone, and I can find somebody else. So, if you want me, you have toleave them. (virgin, age 20)

Women did not want to be seen as a whore, ho, slut, or flirt girl. Almost allthe participants described feeling “impure,” “dirty,” and like “sluts” for sex-ual activity that they had engaged in previously. Many women regretted theirsexual experience and wished they could reverse at least some past activity,particularly if they had been with a player, as that meant they were potentialflirt girls.

Describing Ideal Sexual Relationships

Women’s understandings of ideal sexual relationships took shape andwere altered through experiences such as being in good and bad relation-ships, engaging in unsafe sexual practices, and viewing others’relationships.

Wanting a Future Together

The majority of women, particularly those who accepted and altered mes-sages about Latinas sexuality, believed sexual activity should occur within arelationship that is “going somewhere.” Ideally, these women would like tofall in love and then have sex grow out of the established relationship. Theobjective appeared to be long-term romantic fidelity, often with marriagebeing the ultimate realization of relational goals.

For me, an ideal sexual relationship would be in the context of a loving rela-tionship with at least tentative plans—the ultimate goal being a future together.And if I didn’t feel that way in a relationship, then I wouldn’t have sex. Lastyear, the boy I was dating before my boyfriend, we had been together foralmost 2 years, but we didn’t sleep together because I knew that he wasn’t theone. (Puerto Rican, 11 to 20 partners, age 22)

If women did have sexual relationships without being in love or they hadsexual relationships that subsequently ended, they either considered theexperience to be a learning process or judged themselves harshly. Negativesexual experiences, including sexual violence (n = 15) and unsafe sex, made




women feel poorly about themselves as sexual beings and sometimes led toplans to stop or alter sexual activity (e.g., stop having vaginal intercourse).

Wanting a Reciprocal Romantic Relationship

In many regards, the ideal sexual relationship is synonymous with an idealrelationship. Women described wanting a reciprocal relationship with a per-son with whom they could share dreams; “Somebody who you can confide inwith your own secrets that nobody else would. And somebody who you havea very good bond with, but at the same time, they have their own independ-ence” (Puerto Rican, married, age 26). Everyone wanted to be treated like afull person, not just a sexual being. Participants felt that sexual relationshipsinclude more than sexual behavior; they listed honesty, copious communica-tion, companionship, and friendship. One participant described her ideal sex-ual partner as “a man who could fulfill me the most, and it wouldn’t be in justsexual terms. He would, it would have to be in every other aspect, like emo-tional, psychologically, mentally, and every other aspect” (Puerto Rican, age36, 1 sexual partner). She felt her husband was this person.

The majority of participants focused on relational aspects of reciprocity,although a few women (n = 6) mentioned particulars about sexual behavior.These women expressed desire for partners who recognized that women pos-ses sexual feelings and sexuality. They wanted someone who would not just“roll over” when they ejaculated. For some, having sex regularly within acommitted relationship represented the ultimate connection. A 30-year-oldmarried woman stated that she would ideally like to have sex with her hus-band every day. In contrast, a single Puerto Rican (age 27) who met her cur-rent partner on the Internet thought that partners worked out the particularsbetween them so expectations about the frequency of sexual activity weremisguided. An 18-year-old Puerto Rican wanted a man who knew somethingabout anatomy and sexuality and was not a “dingbat.” A partner who recog-nized a woman’s need for sexual fulfillment and was not “selfish” was part ofLatinas’ descriptions of an ideal sexual relationship.

Wanting a Safe Relationship

Another facet of an ideal sexual relationship is physical and emotionalsafety. Women wanted monogamous relationships free of disease and thefear of pregnancy as these concerns diminished relationship quality. TheLatinas who rejected and altered traditional messages about sexuality mostoften mentioned emotional health as vital. This entailed not sleeping withmultiple partners, having sex when using drugs or alcohol, having sex imme-




diately after a breakup, and having unsafe sex. Part of these fears stemmedfrom reputation concerns.

I don’t want to have to worry about AIDS. I don’t want to have to worry aboutgetting pregnant because there’s nasty things out there I just don’t want. I don’twant to be Jerry Springer material any time soon. (Puerto Rican, 7 to 10 sexualpartners, age 21)

Most of all, being safe meant that women felt free to talk about what theywanted and did not want sexually with a partner. Staying true to one’s beliefsabout sexual relationships and appropriate sexual activity depended on theability to express and negotiate these wishes with a partner without anyregrets. “The ideal sexual relationship would be like if you have successfulgood conversations about sex. Because if you are open and you can say every-thing that you feel like, then you don’t have to stay with anything (PuertoRican, married, age 36).

Discussion

These findings suggest processes consistent with script theory (Simon &Gagnon, 1987). Women learned about appropriate and acceptable sexualbehavior within the context of their cultural backgrounds, and these culturalscripts can be seen in the interaction between intrapsychic- and interpersonal-level scripts. For instance, almost half of the participants did not consider oralsex to constitute having had sex, and most participants did not readily men-tion oral-genital contact when asked to define sex (cf Remez, 2000; Sanders& Reinisch, 1999). Oral-genital contact is not readily offered as part of thedefinition of sex because oral sex is not scripted as “real” sex (Gagnon, 1990),although it became a common part of sexual scripts for heterosexual college-educated men and women during the past century (Gagnon & Simon, 1987).For those women inexperienced with vaginal intercourse (26%), not consid-ering oral sex (intrapsychic level) to be sex constituted a way to avoid being aflirt girl, which was incongruent with their identities as good women. Moretraditional Latinas felt that all kinds of intimacy were sexual because of theiracceptance of cultural-level scripts about all sexual activity being confinedwithin marriage. For these women, focusing on vaginal intercourse as the actrepresented sexual agency because they could maintain their virginity (cfHolland et al., 1996). However, guilt and secrecy pervaded their experiencesof any kind sexual intimacy they experienced because of the lack of congru-ency between intrapsychic- and cultural-level scripts.

Defining sex as intercourse allowed many Latinas in this study whoresisted and altered cultural messages about sexual women to be intimate




with romantic partners but not risk being inappropriately sexual and threaten-ing their identity as moral women. “There are specific arenas in which Latinawomen have some latitude to express sexual pleasure despite negative cul-tural rules, and there are ways in which women demonstrate resistance torestrictive sexual norms” (Irvine, 1995, p. 28). The gaps between dominantideology and Latinas’ socialization show how conflict existed between vari-ous levels of scripts. They experienced conflict between cultural ideas of sex-ual women, expectations that romantic relationships entailed sexual activity,and their desires to be sexual (intrapsychic level) within romantic relation-ships in which they were involved (interpersonal level). Even if Latinas hadpreviously engaged in vaginal intercourse, restricting sexual activitiesenabled them to regain control until they found a worthy partner.

Avoiding Players and Being a Flirt Girl

Participants described how Latinas are sorted into two classes of women:Bad women, or flirt girls, are sexually experienced, talk about sex, recognizesexual desire, and have multiple sexual partners, whereas good girls remainvirginal (señoritas) until marriage, do not actively initiate sex, and do not dis-cuss sexual issues. Avoiding players and not being seen as a flirt girl related toparticipants’ ideas about sexual relationships. Women described ideallywanting relationships that involved commitment, reciprocity, and safety.They endorsed a permissiveness-with-affection attitude toward sexual activ-ity; that is, participants evaluated sex within the confines of a stable and affec-tionate relationship as acceptable behavior (making love); very few womenendorsed a permissive or recreational attitude toward sexual behavior (hav-ing sex) (Reiss, 1967). The assessment of women who have sex without loveas promiscuous influenced participants’ definitions of sex and making love.They responded to ideas of women’s interest in sexual pleasure as threatening(Simon & Gagnon, 1987). Broader cultural scripts portray unemotional andcasual sex as negative for women. Participants’ parameters for making loveinvolved long-term committed and intimate relationships in which feelingshad developed, even if that had not been their past or present experience inrelationships.

If the goals of sexual desire for women entail interpersonal and romanticinvolvement (Regan & Berscheid, 1996), being seen as promiscuous endan-gers these goals, particularly if men prefer partners with moderate sexualexperience (Sprecher, McKinney, & Orbuch, 1991). Few participants dis-cussed sexual pleasure as the primary reason for their sexual relationships;instead, they focused attention on the future of the relationship. Being seen asinterested in sexual pleasure may threaten gender identity that women play




out in their interpersonal relationships (Simon & Gagnon, 1987). Accommo-dating private (intrapsychic) and public (interpersonal) scripts becomes diffi-cult when conflict exists between them; being an object of desire and at thesame time desiring another presented participants with feelings that wereincongruous with their interactions (Simon & Gagnon, 1987).

Dating a player constituted dangerous behavior because of perceptionsthat these men were too traditional Latino or traditional macho. “A woman’sidentity rests not only on her own behaviors but on her partner’s actions andothers’ appraisals and evaluations of her actions” (Horowitz, 1983, p. 119).Maintaining a public image as a virgin or virtuous woman (i.e., only has sexin committed relationships) meant being seen with a respectable man. A manwho endorsed a permissive attitude toward sex likely would consider awoman who engaged in sexual activity as a ho or flirt girl. Some womenexpressed a preference for dating non-Latino men for this reason. All partici-pants craved equal relationships but talked about the difficulty of negotiatingsexuality because of identity issues. They feared being labeled negatively bypartners and their family. Participants were encouraged to view men as theenemy, an enemy who only wanted them for sexual activities. This conflictcan be seen in the traditional dating script in which men play the role of per-suader and women the sexually reluctant ones. The traditional heterosexualscript provides limited communicative roles for men and women. Mostwomen in the study reinforced these cultural ideas by stating that men woulddo anything to have sex (even use condoms), and they had to be vigilant aboutplayers. When young women are depicted solely as objects of male desirerather than sexual actors in their own right, this perpetuates cultural-levelscripts of women as sexual victims denying that women also experiencedesire (Fine, 1988).

Safer sex was smart sex, meaning that a woman avoided disease and preg-nancy, as well as cared for her emotional self. The care of the emotional selfentailed honesty: knowing when one was involved in a “horrible” relation-ship and getting out, and selecting appropriate partners. One way to ensureemotional health was to avoid players. The most common method for detect-ing a player involved inquiries in one’s social network about the person inquestion. Women believed asking others the proper questions about a man’sbackground would provide them with the information necessary to determinea man’s risk, and not just in sexual terms (Lear, 1995).

The idea of safer sex as emotional health and detecting players raises someimportant issues. First, the participants in this sample were highly educated;they all had or were pursuing higher education. This meant they had access tosexual information and classes that raised their awareness of restrictive gen-der roles and notions of the integration of emotional and physical safety.




Also, they would have been exposed to a variety of viewpoints that chal-lenged traditional ideas of Latinas’ sexuality. Thus, it seems likely that somewomen would have considered emotional health to be integral to safer sex.

Other important implications of defining safer sex as emotional reside inLatinas’ level of comfort with sexual talk and their relational scripts. Partici-pants were mostly clear about safer behavior; they were not as confidentabout how to always accomplish this behavior. Generally, reported condomuse was highly inconsistent. Scripts of ideal relationships as committed andmonogamous contributed to this inconsistency. More traditional womenreported being uncomfortable about sexual talk with partners; it was easier toask others about a potential partner’s risks.

The decision to practice safer sex requires the acknowledgment of sexualactivity and potentially casting the relationship as casual, something that isnot considered appropriate for “good girls” (Marin, Gomez, et al., 1993).Less traditional Latinas reported more confidence in their ability to negotiatecondom use compared with more traditional Latinas as Latinas who carrycondoms and discuss contraception and condom use with partners may belabeled promiscuous. Women may engage in unprotected sex to feel emo-tionally close to a partner and to avoid being seen as a whore (cf Sobo, 1995).This suggests that comfort level with sex, reasons for not using condoms, andacceptance of cultural norms are important matters to consider when design-ing intervention programs.

Implications

Educators and practitioners should consider Latinas’personal and culturaldefinitions of sex as well as their acculturation levels. Young Latinas, part ofthe so-called Generation Ñ, wrestle with sexual identity issues, and manyreject traditional roles. Haubegger (1999) felt that women in her generationare less tolerant in general, and specifically less tolerant of machismo, cheat-ing, and being submissive to men. Acculturation pressures are particularlyimportant because they represent the dialectical tension between desire forseparation from past norms and wishes to retain Latin culture.

Prevention programs should allow for discussion about traditional andchanging scripts of sexuality at various levels. Programs that ask for changesin interpersonal scripts that conflict with cultural norms may fail (Irvine,1995). Traditional gender-role norms do not provide women with the skillsand attitudes required to effectively negotiate sexual practices (Gomez &Marin, 1996). The ability to negotiate sexual behavior requires comfort andin some cases explicit talk that can threaten an individual’s self-concept andrelationship. The fear of being labeled a flirt girl may keep women from




being as open as they truly want and need with their sexual partners. Womenwho engage in unprotected oral sex as a means of abstinence and/or to protecttheir reputations may be placing themselves at risk (cf Remez, 2000). Latinasrequire sexual communication skills training in an atmosphere characterizedby sensitivity to cultural norms.

The results of this study show the need to study other groups of Latinas.The women in this study all had higher education, were fairly acculturated,and most had grown up in the United States. The process of contending withmessages about sexuality most likely differs for Latinas with other back-grounds and situations (e.g., not highly educated, not highly acculturated,lesbians). Future research should address how Latinas from different back-grounds define sexuality and negotiate sexual activity within and outsidetheir cultural frameworks.

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Sandra L. Faulkner is an assistant professor in the Department of Speech Communica-tion at Syracuse University, researching ethnic identity, intergroup communication,self-disclosure, and sexual talk. She received her master’s (1995) and Ph.D. (1999) fromThe Pennsylvania State University with emphases in interpersonal communication andwomen’s studies. She teaches courses in sexual communication, qualitative researchmethods, and interpersonal and intercultural communication. She pays tribute to hersouthern childhood roots when she makes her luscious peach pies.




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