Impure Relations: Feminism, Pornography and Ethical Heterosex
-
Upload
khangminh22 -
Category
Documents
-
view
0 -
download
0
Transcript of Impure Relations: Feminism, Pornography and Ethical Heterosex
Impure relations: feminism, pornography and ethicalheterosex
Author:Albury, Katherine
Publication Date:2006
DOI:https://doi.org/10.26190/unsworks/19383
License:https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/3.0/au/Link to license to see what you are allowed to do with this resource.
Downloaded from http://hdl.handle.net/1959.4/57213 in https://unsworks.unsw.edu.au on 2022-07-31
1
Impure Relations: Feminism, Pornography and
Ethical Heterosex
Katherine Albury
PhD, School of Media, Film and Theatre
2006
ABSTRACT
This thesis engages with feminist and queer theory to assert that heterosexuality can be understood not as a fixed, unchanging and oppressive institution, but as changing combination of erotic and social affects which coexist within public and private bodies, discourses and imaginations. Drawing on the work on Michel Foucault, William Connolly, Eve Sedgwick and others, it examines the multiple discourses of heterosexuality that are already circulating in popular culture, specifically, representations of sex and gender within sexually explicit media. It examines the fields of polyamory, ‘feminist porn’, amateur and DIY pornography and ‘taboo’ sexual practices to demonstrate the possibilities offered by non-normative readings of heterosex. These readings open up space not only for queerer, less oppressive heterosexualities, but also for models of ethical sexual learning which incorporate heterosexual eroticism and emphasise both the pleasures and dangers of heterosex.
Keywords: Heterosexuality, Pornography, Sexual Ethics, Feminism
PLEASE TYPE THE UNIVERSITY OF NEW SOUTH WALES
Thesis/Dissertation Sheet
Surname or Family name: Albury
First name: Katherine
Abbreviation for degree as given in the University calendar: margaret
School: SAM (previously EMPA)
Title: Impure relations: Feminism, pornography and ethical heterosex
Other name/s: Margaret
Faculty: Arts and Social Sciences
Abstract 350 words maximum: (PLEASE TYPE)
This thesis engages with feminist and queer theory to assert that heterosexuality can be understood not as a fixed, unchanging and oppressive institution, but as changing combination of erotic and social affects which coexist within public and private bodies, discourses and imaginations. Drawing on the work on Michel Foucault, William Connolly, Eve Sedgwick and others, it examines the multiple discourses of heterosexuality that are already circulating in popular culture, specifically, representations of sex and gender within sexually explicit media. It examines the fields of polyamory, 'feminist porn', amateur and DIY pornography and 'taboo' sexual practices to demonstrate the possibilities offered by non-normative readings of heterosex. These readings open up space not only for queerer, less oppressive heterosexualities, but also for models of ethical sexual learning which incorporate heterosexual eroticism and emphasise both the pleasures and dangers of heterosex.
Declaration relating to disposition of project thesis/dissertation
I hereby grant to the University of New South Wales or its agents the right to archive and to make available my thesis or dissertation in whole or in part in the University libraries in all forms of media, now or here after known, subject to the provisions of the Copyright Act 1968. I retain all property rights, such as patent rights. I also retain the right to use in future works (such as articles or books) all or part of this thesis or dissertation.
I also authorise University Microfilms to use the 350 word abstract of my thesis in Dissertation Abstracts International (this is applicable to doctoral theses only).
Signature
2� �AA i-ot7. Witness Signature Date
The University recognises that there may be exceptional circumstances requiring restrictions on copying or conditions on use. Requests for restriction for a period of up to 2 years must be made in writing. Requests for a longer period of restriction may be considered in exceptional circumstances and require the aooroval of the Dean of Graduate Research.
FOR OFFICE USE ONLY Date of completion of requirements for Award:
ORIGINALITY STATEMENT
'I hereby declare that this submission is my own work and to the best of my knowledge it contains no materials previously published or written by another person, or substantial proportions of material which have been accepted for the award of any other degree or diploma at UNSW or any other educational institution, except where due acknowledgement is made in the thesis. Any contribution made. to the research by others, with whom I have worked at UNSW or elsewhere, is explicitly acknowledged in the thesis. I also declare that the intellectual content of this thesis is the product of my own work, except to the extent that assistance from others in the project's design and conception or in style, presentation and linguistic expression is acknowledged.'
Signed Date
1.P-r-2-otr
COPYRIGHT STATEMENT
‘I hereby grant the University of New South Wales or its agents the right to archive and to make available my thesis or dissertation in whole or part in the University libraries in all forms of media, now or here after known, subject to the provisions of the Copyright Act 1968. I retain all proprietary rights, such as patent rights. I also retain the right to use in future works (such as articles or books) all or part of this thesis or dissertation. I also authorise University Microfilms to use the 350 word abstract of my thesis in Dissertation Abstract International (this is applicable to doctoral theses only). I have either used no substantial portions of copyright material in my thesis or I have obtained permission to use copyright material; where permission has not been granted I have applied/will apply for a partial restriction of the digital copy of my thesis or dissertation.'
Signed ……………………………………………...........................
Date ……………………………………………...........................
AUTHENTICITY STATEMENT
‘I certify that the Library deposit digital copy is a direct equivalent of the final officially approved version of my thesis. No emendation of content has occurred and if there are any minor variations in formatting, they are the result of the conversion to digital format.’
Signed ……………………………………………...........................
Date ……………………………………………...........................
2
Acknowledgements and dedication I have been writing this thesis for a long time, and am deeply grateful to everyone who has assisted and encouraged my (distracted) progress. Special thanks are due to my three supervisors: Gay Hawkins, David Halperin and Sue Kippax. I am also appreciative of my friends and colleagues in the School of Media, Film and Theatre, UNSW; The National Centre for HIV Social Research, UNSW; the Media and Communications Program, and the Department of Gender and Cultural Studies, both at the University of Sydney; and all my friends and partners–in-crime in the incredibly fertile fields of Cultural Studies and Sex Studies. Too many friends, lovers and drinking buddies have held my hand over the years, and in the interests of sanity and brevity I can only name a few here. I would especially like to thank Michael Finucan, Linda Jaivin, Catharine Lumby, Alan McKee, Elspeth Probyn, Clif Evers, Fiona Giles, Lamia Dabboussy, Pete Minter and Paul Kylstra for backing me up when I was at my best…and at my worst. Thanks also to Michael Wall for editing and proofing. Much love and thanks to my family (biological and chosen), particularly Alicia Albury, Ian Schofield, Jack Schofield, Jessica Schofield, Randall Albury, Barbara Albury, William Albury, Rebecca Albury, Graeme Barwell and Tobin Saunders. Special thanks and love to Sean Goodwin.
This thesis is dedicated to my grandma, Katherine Jane McClure, with much love.
3
Contents
Introduction: Dirty talk 3
Chapter 1: Problematising heterosexuality 30
Chapter 2: Impure relations: The ethics of heterosexuality 64
Chapter 3: Sex in public: Raunch culture and feminist porn 99
Chapter 4: Out of the bedroom … heterosexuality in amateur porn 135
Chapter 5: Abject masculinities 165
Chapter 6: The trouble with anal sex 208
Chapter 7: Conclusion: queer learning and ethical Heterosex 239
References: 259
4
Introduction: Dirty talk
What I want to ask is: Are we able to have an ethics of acts and their
pleasures which would be able to take into account the pleasures of the
other?
Michel Foucault, On the Genealogy of Ethics
Since the late 1960s, feminists in Australia, the US and Britain have drawn links between
men’s and women’s everyday sexual and emotional relations; and the broader issue of
institutionalised homophobia, heterosexism and heteronormativity.1 The exact nature of
these links, along with the question of how they might be broken, has been hotly
contested. This thesis seeks to both engage with, and depart from, feminist thinking on
the representation of heterosexuality in media and popular culture, specifically (but not
exclusively) representations that might be considered ‘pornographic’. I will seek to
explore the arguments feminist and other theories of heterosexuality have offered to
explain the oppressive aspects of heterosexuality as an institution; and ask why these
arguments have, as yet, been unable to propose a model of ethical heterosexuality that 1 In her history of Australian left-wing movements (including feminism), Verity Burgmann notes that while feminism is often discussed in terms of a discrete ‘first wave’ and ‘second wave’, the work of feminist historians such as Marilyn Lake (1999) points to a great deal of organised feminist activity between the First and Second World Wars – that is, prior to the official second wave. She observes, however, that sexuality was a key area of conflict that shaped the emergence of the second wave (as we know it). However, similar conflicts had existed within earlier (first wave) feminism. While some had called for sexual equality in terms of demanding male chastity and temperance, others championed ‘free love’ and sex-radicalism (see Bland 1985). The double standard of sexuality was opposed by feminists of the late 1960s and 1970s, just as it had been by earlier feminists. However the goal here was not male purity, and the protection of the sanctity of marriage, but an undoing of the institution of marriage which demanded virginity and monogamy from women, without enforcing the same restraints on men (for more on 19th and early 20th century approaches to the politics of women’s sexuality see Bland 1983, Bland and Mort 1997, DuBois and Gordon 1992, Epstein 1984, and Walkowitz 1984).
5
encourages both eroticism and an ethos of care between men and women? In response to
this question, I suggest that theories of heterosexuality have not paid sufficient attention
to aspects of popular accounts of heterosexual practices. These texts, I will argue, offer
fertile possibilities for modelling ethical forms of heterosexuality that do not rely of the
sanctification of political, moral or religious norms.
Given that I am exploring the limits and potentials of heterosexuality, it is valuable to
define several terms I will be using to describe it within this project. The term
‘heterosexuality’ is, in some ways, vague. It can describe sexual attraction between a man
and a woman, sexual activity between men and women, or a broader political institution.
I use the terms ‘institutional heterosexuality’ to distinguish between everyday sexual or
relational interactions between men and women, and the social and political structures
that both assume and enforce an ideal of heterosexuality as universal norm. As an
institution, heterosexuality does not just exclude sexual partnerships between same sex
partners (or, indeed, partners who do not identify as ‘male’ or ‘female’), but actively
penalises individuals or groups who do not conform to heterosexual norms. These norms
are defined not only through inclusion, but by means of exclusion. They consist of (but
are not limited to) an insistence that sexual contact is legitimate between married,
monogamous male/female partnerships, but not between unmarried or same-sex partners;
a presumption that men are sexual aggressors, and women are sexual objects (and hence
targets for male aggression); a reification of reproduction and childrearing as the proper
realm for women; and the exclusion of men from childrearing. Normative heterosexuality
then, is dependent of an assumption of difference between men and women, that extends
6
not just to biological differences but to all aspects of life – that is, to the gendered
practices of everyday masculinity and femininity (see Butler 1990, 1993).
Within the normalised framework (which Butler (1993) has dubbed “the heterosexual
matrix”) heterosexuality is dependent on the assumption that morally and politically
hierarchised gender difference is the foundation of legitimate eroticism. As Sigmund
Freud puts it: “You cannot be what you desire; you cannot desire what you wish to be”
(quoted in Segal 1994: 124). Within institutionalised or normative heterosexuality, social
and sexual roles are considered direct consequence of biological sex. In the most
restrictive and oppressive cases, these roles are considered to be timeless, innate, and
beyond question. Male social and sexual superiority over women is assumed, and may
legitimately be policed by means of coercion or force. Heterosexuality becomes not just
one aspect of human sexual expression, but becomes, as Adrienne Rich puts it
“compulsory heterosexuality” (1980). Within this framework, it is assumed that men and
women must become sexual partners by default, rather than by choice. In a regime of
compulsory heterosexuality, same-sex partnerships are not just considered deviant, but
are actively penalised by educational, political and religious institutions.
If normative heterosexuality relies on the hierarchical ranking of men over women, and
male/female partnerships over same-sex partnerships, does a non-normative
heterosexuality (that is, a heterosexuality that doesn’t depend on punitive hierarchies)
require the complete dissolution of these categories? For my purposes, the answer is no.
Both heterosexuality and homosexuality rely on categories of sex and gender: there can
be no same-sex partnership without recognition of a sex that is ‘the same.’ As Butler puts
7
it, there is no outside of sex, or for that matter gender (1990, 1993). If Butler’s proposal
that gender is a copy for which there is no original is extended to its limit, it is fair to
suppose that sex and gender differences (that is, the biological and behavioural variations
that we understand as masculinity and femininity) are strongly eroticised, and even
fetishised. However, this does not necessarily impose a model of men and women as
‘opposites’. Since there are many possible permutations of sexed and gendered
expression that do not necessarily bond hegemonic masculinity with biological maleness,
and hegemonic femininity with biological femaleness, I prefer to adopt Jonathan
Dollimore’s model of sexual proximity (1991), or Eve Sedgwick’s axiom: ‘people are
different from each other’ (1990). These queer perspectives embrace multiple possible
combinations of sameness and difference within the fields of sex, sexuality and gender
(1991). Of course, in some cases this less restrictive view of sex between men and
women will appear exactly like the eroticisation of difference that is recognised as
normative heterosexuality. In other instances, sameness might be eroticised between male
and female partners. However, an ethical approach to heterosexuality does not privilege
sameness over difference, or vice versa. Rather, it foregrounds an ethics of care of the
self, and care of others. Since ethical heterosexuality is not bounded by the rules of
institutional heterosexuality, with prescriptions for correct gendered, sexual behaviour,
and penalties for misbehaviour, it is harder to define. Ethical heterosexuality, unlike
institutionalised heterosexuality is not bounded by political or religious laws, but instead
is made up of practices of freedom.
8
Within this thesis I will engage some long-running arguments that I believe are still not
only relevant for contemporary feminists, but are also implicitly built into many
contemporary discussions of sexuality, particularly heterosexuality, as it is represented in
media and popular culture. My interest is not that of a historian; that is, I am not claiming
to unearth or reassemble lost or archival documents. I am more interested in the way
feminist critiques of heteronormativity and institutionalised sexism have come to be
organised in particular ways. I am concerned with what I see as a dissonance in
contemporary popular feminist (or feminist-inflected) critiques of sexuality in media and
popular culture. I do not deny that there is a proliferation of images of sexuality, and that
the majority of popular or mainstream images focus on women in an eroticised,
heterosexual context. However, these images are not homogenous in their representations
of sex, sexuality and gender. They do not uniformly objectify or degrade women, nor do
they all represent men as unyielding phallic ‘masters of the universe’. Instead they reflect
a wide range of sexual activities and subjectivities, male and female. In addition, they
reflect changing cultural attitudes to sexuality, sexual agency and sexual norms.
Many contemporary sex media can, in fact, be read as direct products of a ‘successful’
feminist project. However, they can only be recognized as such if representations of
sexuality are viewed in the context of ethics, rather than morals, and if gradual,
micropolitical shifts are recognised as ‘real’ political change – a recognition which, I will
argue, has been limited in the highly moralised context of certain feminist popular
discourses on public and/or commercial sex. Drawing on the work of Michel Foucault
and others, I will argue that the normative constructions of heterosexuality which have
been replicated within some feminist critiques have produced a theoretical dead-end in
9
relation to heterosex. That is, they foreclose on the possibility of non-normative
heterosexualities by refusing to recognise shifts and changes in certain contemporary
sexed and gendered practices. In addition, a moralising tendency within feminism has
limited understandings of popular media representations of sexuality (particularly
pornography) to dichotomies of ‘good’ and ‘bad’ images, without seeking to explore the
specific contexts in which these media texts are produced and consumed.
I will suggest that, in opposition to this tendency, there is a more contingent, and indeed
queerer, reading of both past and present modes of producing and consuming sexually
explicit media that opens up a space for rethinking heterosexualities. I will contend that
heterosexuality can be understood as a changing combination of erotic and social affects
which coexist within public and private bodies, discourses and imaginations, rather than
as a fixed and oppressive institution. In examining the multiple discourses of
heterosexuality that are already circulating in popular culture, I will demonstrate the
possibilities offered by non-normative readings of heterosex. That is, I will offer readings
that open up space not only for queerer, less oppressive heterosexualities, but also for
models of sexual learning which incorporate heterosexual eroticism and emphasise both
the pleasures and dangers of heterosex.
While I will acknowledge the history of feminist debates around pornography, I am not
seeking to completely retell this history. Although it could be argued that by using
pornography as text for analysis I am implicitly supporting what might be considered an
‘anti-censorship/pro-porn’ feminism, this is not my sole intention. Certainly I am not
‘anti-porn’, but that is not so much because I am a supporter of ‘free speech’, but because
10
I am interested in looking carefully at what porn actually is, and what kinds of stories it
tells about contemporary sexualities. Since I am specifically interested in heterosexuality,
and porn is one of the most widely circulated ‘public’ textual representations of sexuality,
it makes sense to look closely at heterosexual porn. Who features in it? Who makes it?
What do they do? What might it mean? I do not ask these questions in order to determine
whether pornography is ‘good’ or ‘bad’ for women, but to open up an ameliorative
discussion of contemporary heterosexuality that does not interpret all sexually explicit
images as simplistic tracts preaching heterosexism, homophobia and misogyny. Instead, I
will suggest that not only have popular sexual images and texts changed significantly in
response to feminist and queer critiques, but that these texts can and should be deployed
and engaged with by theorists, activists, writers and educators, so that, as Eve Sedgwick
puts it, ‘the future may be different from the present’ (2004:146).
In Chapter 1, I will consider the history of feminist responses to heterosexuality, as an
institution and as a sexual identity. As I will argue, early second-wave feminists offered a
strong critique of heteronormativity, and challenged not just public conduct, and publicly
circulated images of heterosex, but also the role that the privatised ‘family’ played in the
reinscribing of sex and gender inequities. However, by the mid-1980s, the critique of the
family had become quieter, and less radical, while critiques of commercial sex and
pornography were becoming louder and more intense. I will argue that this reflects the
limitation of feminisms shaped around moralistic rather than ethical understandings of
sexuality, and suggest that a certain double standard took hold in both feminism itself,
and in the work of sociologists such as Anthony Giddens who drew on feminism as a
framework for thinking about sex and relationships. In contrast to this moralistic
11
framework, I will offer William Connolly’s model of ‘micropolitics’ as a useful tool for
thinking about the ways that everyday discourses of sexuality can be read as tools of
social change.
In Chapter 2, I will extend this consideration of morals versus ethics to examine queer
and feminist debates about the role that alternative relationship structures play in
challenging or perpetuating heteronormativity. Drawing on Foucault’s thinking on
‘ethical sensibilities’, I will explore the contemporary relationship style of polyamory (or
ethical non-monogamy) as a means of unpacking some of the benefits of applying ethical,
rather than moral, thinking to contemporary heterosex.
Chapter 3 will shift the focus somewhat to contemporary complaints about the
‘sexualisation’ of women in popular culture, and the supposed ‘co-opting’ of feminist
discourses of sexual freedom and empowerment by porn producers and others. Again I
will draw on Foucauldian thinking on the deployment of sexuality by means of a
normalising opposition of ‘public sex’ and ‘privatised sexuality’. Engaging with Michael
Warner’s overview of feminist critiques of the ‘public/private’ binary, I will argue that
boundaries are not only very difficult to discern between public and private sex, but
boundaries between ‘feminist’ and ‘anti-feminist’ female sexual display are also quite
hard to determine in some contexts. I will offer a brief history of contemporary feminist
pornography, and look at the ways that sexually explicit texts and erotic objects (such as
vibrators) have been adopted by feminist and gay educators in specific ways.
In Chapter 4, I will extend this discussion to examine the ways that heterosexual
amateurs have adapted domestic media technologies to become DIY (do it yourself)
12
pornographers. I will consider the role that ‘becoming a pornstar’ might play for
everyday producers and consumers of pornography, and explore some of the literature
which links this to changing understandings of gender and sexuality.
Chapter 5 looks specifically at heterosexual men’s engagement with pornography, and
the ways that heterosexual men’s bodies (including their ejaculating penises) are both
addressed and represented in pornographic and non-pornographic media texts. Drawing
on Julia Kristeva’s theory of the abject and Sylvan Tomkins’ work on affect, I will argue
that contemporary pornography can be seen to reflect a male bodily engagement with
‘messy’ corporeality that can be productively engaged with elsewhere – for example in
safer sex education.
My last chapter looks at the way that pornographic and non-pornographic texts have
engaged with the ‘taboo’ topic of anal sex, and the ways that heterosexuality can be seen
to be ‘queered’ in these engagements. In conclusion, I will offer a case study of a
research and education program focused on ‘ethical heterosex’, and suggest other
possibilities for engaging with the damaging aspects of heteronormativity that do not seek
to impose moralising or normalising models of sex and gender. In doing so, I will support
an understanding of heterosexuality that accepts, rather than rejects, humour, messiness
and eroticism as tools for sexual learning, and represents sexual ethics, in Foucault’s
words, as ‘practices of freedom’.
13
Sex, theory and popular media
Since I am not only a commentator on but also a producer of popular discourses of
sexuality, I am wary of claiming detachment or objectivity. When asked to describe my
academic work in a nutshell, I tend to say that my research focuses on ‘representations of
sexuality in media and popular culture’ – specifically, representations of heterosexuality
in media and popular culture. This description, although factually accurate, is deliberately
vague. It is easy enough to describe my objects of study: television programs, women’s
magazines, popular films and videos, pornography, journalistic reporting and so on. But it
can much harder to contextualise the means or methods I use when reading these texts.
Following the Foucauldian position that suggests that ‘researching sexuality’ is in itself a
means of producing and reproducing certain ‘truths’ about sexuality, the academic who
researches sex is already part of the field of her own inquiry. This realisation is even
more strongly evident when the academic is also actively involved in performances of her
own ‘expertise’, both in mainstream media, and in alternative or parodic forums for ‘sex
education’.
I am unable to even pretend to stand outside of ‘representations of sexuality in media and
popular culture’ when I am actively, and willingly, involved in the production and
proliferation of texts that claim to represent sex in particular ways. I am, at once,
producer and product. Just as my media appearances necessarily demand that I draw on
my experience in the performance of ‘academic expertise’, this thesis is saturated with
my experience as a media producer and my experience as a media product/sexpert
intellectual. In addition, I am a consumer of both theoretical and non-theoretical texts and
14
mediated performances. My own output is a synthesis of both my media consumption and
my more ‘scholarly’ consumption of theoretical texts (and participation in discussions of
the ways diverse texts intersect). Underlying all of this is my own mundane experience of
sexuality in its various public and private manifestations.
These everyday experiences and practices, too, have impacted on the way I ‘do theory’.
Although it could be argued that I am attempting to ‘queer’ heterosexuality, in fact my
project stems more from a lack of faith in the processes of normalisation than it does
from a desire to transgress. Popular representations of the ‘trouble with normal’ are
everywhere. From the gossipy discussions of anal sex and golden showers on Sex and the
City to advice columnists responses to porn consumers, the boundaries of normalised
heterosexuality are constantly being tested. Feminism has been popularly linked with ‘the
sexual revolution’, and it has often claimed that both have ‘failed’. It seems to me,
however, that both feminist and non-feminist changes in sexual politics and sexual
relationships have been quite successful. In fact, I argue that the ongoing public debate
around feminism and sexual pleasure is not simply a ‘backlash’ but a sign of feminism’s
success. Success here is not a moment of arrival, or closure, but an ongoing openness to
debate, to conversation, to dialogue that allows for reappraisal, rethinking, and a
willingness to undergo the discomfort that the process of ‘becoming’ can provoke. This
process, however, is written (or spoken) of quite differently in different contexts.
I concede that my aims and methods of analysing, unpacking and theorising media texts
may be different to those of a researcher who does not produce these texts herself (and
different, too, from those who do not enjoy participating in pop culture as a reader, or
15
consumer). I am not looking for signs of ideological manipulation or exploitation, nor am
I looking for ‘hidden meanings’ in popular texts. Rather, I am trying to achieve what Eve
Sedgwick (2004) terms ‘reparative readings’ of both my theoretical and non-theoretical
sources. That is, I am trying to avoid the ‘paranoid’ trend Sedgwick identifies within
critical reading and writing whose political project seems to centre on a) interrogating
theoretical (and popular) texts for signs of false consciousness and/or secret doublespeak
and b) triumphantly revealing and denouncing the same. While I may disagree strongly
with some of the arguments I engage with, and/or argue that an interpretation can be
contested, my main aim is not to ‘expose’ veins of hidden or private meaning in texts.
Nor am I aiming to disprove or dismiss the arguments of any particular theorist or
theoretical tendency (although, as it will become clear, I may position myself strongly in
relation to certain theorists).
Like Sedgwick, I appreciate the valuable contribution that paranoid critical reading and
writing has made to my own development as a scholar, particularly in the case of
Sedgwick’s exemplars of paranoid theory, which include her own Epistemology of the
Closet (1990) and Judith Butler’s Gender Trouble (1990). My aim here (and in Yes
Means Yes) is to avoid paranoia in so far as it is possible to do such a thing within a PhD
thesis. Hence, my primary task as I see it is not to unpack or interrogate popular and
critical texts in such an exhaustive or multifaceted manner that I can insure myself
against all possible criticisms of my interpretations and arguments. Nor am I aiming to
‘call for’ an entirely new mode of thinking and interpretation of popular texts addressing
sexuality. In addition, I will not offer definitive prescriptions for the best or most useful
modes of feminist sexual theories or practices. Instead, I will try to read and write about
16
sexuality and popular texts in an ameliorative or reparative fashion, which, in the terms of
my project, implies reading and thinking about texts in terms of the ways that they
already demonstrate the shifts and rifts in discourses of heteronormative sexuality.
In order to read this way, I am trying to be open to possibilities of different meanings
within singular texts that are not just the results of different audiences and contexts but
may also be produced within the ambiguity of what I see as an already unstable and
imperfect structuring ‘normative’ framework. That is, I am not trying to impose
‘resistant’ or ‘subversive’ readings onto ‘dominant’ texts, but am instead looking for the
possibility of surprises and contradictions within the way texts are produced, read,
circulated and used. I agree with Sedgwick that this mode of reparative reading, which is
easily dismissed as overly optimistic and utopian, is in fact a form of political strategy. In
Sedgwick’s terms, reparative readings involve flexible and open, non-paranoid relations
to existing texts, even if the same texts can be seen as potentially damaging (even
‘murderous’, ‘partial’ or ‘broken’). Through reparative reading (and by extension,
reparative writing) these pre-existing, admittedly imperfect, texts can be reworked,
rethought and rewritten into objects of hope, comfort and even love, even when they are
flawed or contain practical or theoretical ‘mistakes’. It is this acknowledgment of the
productive, queer potential of such mistakes that Sedgwick offers as one of the most
promising aspects of the reparative turn in critical thinking:
Because the reader has room to realise that the future may be different from
the present, it is also possible for her to entertain profoundly painful,
17
profoundly relieving, ethically crucial possibilities as that the past, in turn,
could have happened differently than it actually did. (2004: 146)
Since my thinking is informed and underpinned by feminism, queer theory and cultural
studies, my examples are explored through these theoretical frames. However, I do not
aim to provide an exhaustive history of the debates within any of these theoretical fields.
My methodology could be described by Paula Ahmad’s term ‘theory shopping’ – a
process that involves trying ideas and theoretical programs on for size, in a hopefully
responsible and dialogic fashion. For Ahmad, ‘theory shopping takes advantage of the
skills of browsing, seeing and not seeing the products, according to the specific
situatedness of one’s needs’ (in Hartley 1995: 6-7). As John Hartley describes it, this
interdisciplinary approach to the study of media and culture involves as much respect for
the cultural object as for the theorist or theoretical tendency being worked with. Theory
shopping, as Hartley puts it, is not an orthodox approach to media and cultural studies,
but provides a means of thinking about media and popular culture in terms of ‘the radical
producer and the unknowable consumer’ (1995:7).
The ‘theory shopping’ approach is not uncommon in queer or feminist discussions of
popular culture, although it may appear in different forms in different research projects.
And of course ‘shopping’ is only one description of the process. This mode of strategic
thinking and working with ‘theory’ reflects Michel Foucault’s notion of “theory as a
toolkit” (Foucault 1980: 145). For Foucault, theory is valuable when it is allows the
thinker “to analyse the specificity of mechanisms of power, to locate the connections and
extensions” (1980: 145). It is, he argues “not a system but an instrument”, which allows
18
investigations to be “carried out step by step on the basis of reflection…on given
situations” (1980: 145). It is this process of reflection which allows for a reparative (or at
least less paranoid) reading of popular texts, and the processes by which they are
produced. Joshua Gamson describes the writing up of his research with queer guests on
US talk shows (published as Freaks Talk Back) as a process of ‘banging’ ideas, texts and
observations of the processes of media production together:
… I banged ‘discourse’ and ‘institutions’ against one another for a bit, and
started to see how paradoxes of visibility were structured, often
unintentionally, by the everyday practices and routines of television
producers, working within organisational and institutional constraints.
Strange things started to show up: how producers in search of both novelty
and familiarity wound up with the queerest kinds of shows I had seen, how
for their own reasons producers regularly set up anti-gay bigots as ‘freaks’.
The discourse of sexuality was not just out there, floating along in
disembodied texts of various kinds – talk show episodes, novels, gestures,
whatever – but produced through concrete, mundane activities of cultural
producers (and given new shapes by cultural audiences with their own
tools). (2003: 38)
In my case, I have sought out the ways that popular texts have produced new ways
of thinking, talking about and ‘doing’ heterosexuality, that deserve to be
interpreted not just via a lens of ‘theories of sex and gender’, but with respect to
the contexts in which they are produced, circulated and consumed.
19
Like Hartley and Gamson, I see popular media production (including print, radio and
television journalism) as one of the primary ‘sense-making’ fields of modernity. Since
‘sexuality’ as we know it in the West is itself a product of modernity, I would extend
Hartley’s argument to claim popular media as one of the primary grounds upon which
sexuality itself has been textualised (1995). As Ken Plummer observes, sexual stories, or
intimate narratives of personal experience, are fundamental to the academic study of sex
and gender. Yet, while sexologists, sociologists, criminologists, epidemiologists and
demographers solicit these stories as ‘data’ for their studies, they do not always ask
where the stories ‘come from’ (Plummer 1995). As Plummer puts it, the content of the
stories themselves may not always be as intriguing as the motivations, influences and
impulses that compel both interviewer and interviewee:
… why do people tell these sexual stories – or not tell them? Indeed, why do
they turn what was once a private, secret world into a public one? How do
they choose their language to articulate their concerns – where do the words
come from? What sorts of situations enable people to find a voice, and what
happens to people once they give voice to their sexual story? What gets left
out of the story? How do I ‘hear’ the story, and what do I hear when I hear
it? Again, it is not simply what people say that is my concern, but the
complex social processes involved in the telling. (1995: 13, original
emphasis)
20
I argue that media culture provides one of the primary realms in which to shape
and refine our individual and collective sexual stories. This is quite different to
arguing, as recent feminists critiques of mediated sexuality have done (e.g. Levy,
2005; Jeffreys, 1990, 2005) that the media performs a sinister process of
indoctrination or ‘sexualisation’. Firstly, I reject a “media effects” model which
views media content as forms of “repressive state apparatus” (in Althusserian
terms). I agree that media representations are certainly, in Teresa de Lauretis’s
(1988) terms, “technologies of gender”, and indeed form one kind of “technology
of sex”. But, like many cultural theorists, I argue that we do not know the forms
and effects these technologies may take in the context of everyday media
consumption. After all, the most ‘negative’ or ‘stereotypical’ representation of
sexuality could be someone’s sign that ‘there are other people like me’; that is,
one woman’s ‘stereotypical bimbo’ may be another’s exemplar of sexual
autonomy or agency.
I also contest the tendency within sociology to read media images of sexuality in
limited terms – as simple ‘positive’ or ‘negative’ messages about sex, sexual
health and identity that are primarily understood and valued as vehicles for social
engineering such as public health campaigns (i.e. as a manifestation of
governmentality). I argue that representations of sex in media and pop culture are
valid forms of data, as useful as surveys, questionnaires and focus groups in terms
of understanding how changing, nuanced ‘private’ experiences of sexuality are
contextualised in ‘public’ terms. So, although sociological thinking on sex, gender
and the media has underpinned a great deal of my thinking, and I do draw on
21
sociological method indirectly for some of my analysis, I do not draw a distinction
between media texts and ‘real life’. Consequently, I am not concerned by mixing
texts produced by journalists or other professional producers of sexual discourses
with those produced by ‘amateurs’ (such as interview transcripts). Plummer, for
example, goes to great lengths to contextualise his exploration of mediated
accounts of sexual experience in Telling Sexual Stories as not only media texts but
also as ‘socially produced in social contexts by embodied concrete people
experiencing the thoughts and feelings of everyday life’ (1995: 16, original
emphasis). In contrast, I see media texts themselves as socially produced, in social
contexts. Quoting John Hartley, I argue that
… images, discourses, texts, media and so on are quite real. They can be
observed and investigated empirically … and they are all too real in their
modes of industrial production, their social force, their political effects and
their cultural power … it is not a question of contrasting a real public [or
individual experience] with an illusory media … it is about showing how
pervasive the textualisation of public life has become, and how it works.
(Hartley 1992: 2)
Of course, the conventions of academic speech are different to those of popular
news or entertainment media. The academic voice allows for complexity, paradox
and contradiction in a way that popular discourses may not. In his defence of
Judith Butler, Michael Warner suggests that new or difficult ideas require
22
particularly complex or difficult forms of writing (Warner 2002). While I am not
particularly a fan of Butler’s style, I can accept this argument. Theoretical
discussions should not (and often cannot) be expressed within journalistic
conventions of ‘plain English’. However, I suggest that theories of sexuality are
directly applicable to everyday understandings and experiences of sex and
sexuality. In a project that aims to explore the ways that feminist and queer
understandings of sexuality are manifested within popular culture, I am reluctant
to oppose ‘theoretical discussion’ on one hand to ‘examples from media texts’ on
the other. Inspired by writers such as Warner (1999, 2002), Hartley (1992, 1995),
Plummer (1995) and Catharine Lumby (1997, 1999), I hope to write (and
consequently ‘speak’) in a voice that does not simply demonstrate my academic
scholarship ‘in the field of media and popular culture’, but actively engages with
that field. Having accepted the role of ‘public intellectual’, ‘sexpert’, ‘porn
researcher’ and even ‘university-trained pervert’, it would be disingenuous of me
to pretend to stand outside of cultural conversation I have actively engaged with
for almost ten years.
I am indebted to the Australian tradition of political writing for niche media, in feminist
publications such as Refractory Girl, and gay and lesbian community forums such as the
Sydney Star Observer. Over the past 20-plus years, Australian activists and theorists have
responded to the HIV/AIDS epidemic in many ways. My entire project owes a debt to the
rethinkings of ‘natural’ categories of sex and gender that have been so much a part of
queer and feminist responses to the epidemic. This response has been conducted in
public, via community forums and niche media. As a result, academic researchers such as
23
Gary Dowsett, Sue Kippax, Kane Race and Michael Hurley, to name a few, have
constantly engaged with interdisciplinary audiences. HIV conferences have, by necessity,
involved educators, grassroots community activists, epidemiologists, social scientists and
cultural theorists trained in textual analysis. In these conferences, and other forums,
research findings (even those highly informed by ‘difficult’ theoretical concepts) have
been presented to very mixed audiences. Often, too, they have been immediately
reworked by researchers, translating them directly or indirectly into community education
programs, social marketing campaigns, and articles for niche media.
As Foucault has observed, the first-person sexual confession is a staple of modern
pornographic writing, from the fictional ‘whore’s confessions’ of the seventeenth
century, to the truth-telling of the narrators of ‘My Secret Life’. Running parallel to this
confessional voice is the voice of the scientist, or classifying expert, who speaks not with
the voice of experience but with the measured voice of the objective observer. Embedded
within the voice of expertise is the reported speech of the case study’s subject, such as
Freud’s Dora, or the Wolf Man. Within a professional, disciplinary context, expertise and
authority is demonstrated in specific ways.
Nikolas Rose (1990) has argued that, from the 1930s onwards, general populations have
been encouraged towards self-surveillance, with the aim of creating a normalised climate
of self-help in regards to physical and mental health. Since sexuality is central to the
experience of modern subjectivity, understanding the truth of one’s sexuality is essential
to understanding oneself as subject (or citizen) within contemporary culture. Although
many may hold that sex is ‘natural’, experiencing oneself as an informed ‘sexual citizen’
24
can be a demanding process, requiring outside guidance. As Rose puts it, ‘even pleasure
has become a form of work to be accompanied with the aid of professional expertise and
under the aegis of scientifically codified knowledge’ (1990: 239).
Popular media has played a significant role in disseminating and popularising new
discourses of ‘healthy’ (in both a personal and collective sense) sex. This role is not,
however, always clear cut, since media producers are required not only to inform but to
entertain. The objective voice of authority has its limits in entertainment terms. And
herein lies the problem of speaking the language of ‘sexpertise’. As Hartley puts it, “there
is … a politics of knowledge, a struggle between intellectual culture and popular culture,
for the creation and education of citizen readers.” Academia is presumed to be a place
where groups of thinking, rational subjects join together in a spirit of collegiality to solve
problems, question orthodoxies and both produce and consume texts with a sense of
respectful obligation and duty. In contrast, media audiences are presumed to be passive
and unthinking “publics … created in the name of pleasure and voluntary entertainment
during leisure time” (Hartley 1992: 10).
These publics are created, and serviced, by what Hartley terms ‘the ‘smiling professions’
– visually attractive journalists, actors, presenters and so on ‘whose relationship with the
public is based on mutuality and participation, not on duty or coercion’ (1992: 10). These
smiling professionals provide a kind of bridge between the public sphere and the private
world of intimacy, home and family. Smiling professionals may be talented, hardworking
and knowledgeable within their field, but they must invite an audience’s attention, rather
than command it. Whether they are male or female, Hartley argues, they perform a role
25
that has traditionally been feminised (and therefore undervalued). Like mothers, the work
smiling professionals do must be concealed or subsumed within the appearance of
effortless ‘service delivery’. Interestingly, Hartley draws attention to the sexualised
nature of the smiling professional, observing that:
The historic binary distinction (taboo) between mother and sex partner has
not survived this transition from private to public; motherly there-there care
is now rented out by visually attractive people; wiping up mess and not
minding is now a sexual not maternal service. Functions are feminised; even
if they’re not occupied by women, opposites are ambiguated, which indeed
appears to be the general cultural function of the smiling professions. (1992:
135)
These functions are not restricted to the realm of media culture, however. Hartley
argues that ‘smiling professionals’ are certainly part of contemporary ‘service-
oriented’ academia, but they are more likely to work at lower levels of
institutions. They are tutors, demonstrators and production assistants, rather than
professors. Where ‘smiling’ is encouraged within academia, the field or discipline
is more likely to be seen as feminine, or feminised, regardless of the gender of its
workers. Moreover, the disciplines that Hartley names as the “enemies of smiling”
(law, medicine, philosophy and so on) have, he argues, “retained a straight-faced
craggy-jawed masculinism, especially in their higher echelons. So the distinction
between smiling and non-smiling is not watertight” (1992: 135). Within this
context, those academics like myself who assume the feminised role of ‘smiling
26
sexpert’, or even are more willing than most to provide a media ‘grab’ or appear
on a current affairs or breakfast television program, may be condemned in
traditionally sexualised terms from within the academy.
Popular culture has integrated aspects of intellectual discourse in the guise of
‘expert commentary’, but this is not the only space where popular media assumes
an explicitly or implicitly ‘educational’ role in regards to sexuality. Pornographic
texts, and even less explicit popular texts such as music videos, are widely
regarded as ‘textbooks’ for sexual attitudes and behaviours. For critics of sexually
explicit media, the ‘lessons’ in erotic or suggestive media are bad ones. I agree
that some sexually explicit texts eroticise misogyny, and the question of sexual
pedagogy and sexual learning in popular media deserves serious critical attention.
However, simply naming an image (such as pornography), practice (such as anal
sex) or group (male porn consumers) ‘sexist’, ‘oppressive’ or even ‘hegemonic’
seems to me to be a frustrating political strategy. I am more interested in looking
at the ways that feminist critiques of sexually explicit media have been taken up
by both ‘alternative’ and ‘mainstream’ porn producers. Though I discuss the ways
that women have explicitly or implicitly deployed reversal of sex/gender norms –
for example in celebrations of sexual behaviours traditionally defined as ‘slutty’, I
do not wish to suggest that these practices are inherently liberating. I am less
concerned with pronouncing a moral judgement on these texts or practices, and
more interested in the ways that popular sexually explicit or sexually suggestive
texts might be seen to both represent and reflect changing political and personal
attitudes to sexuality and gender, particularly heterosexuality. Finally, I am
27
interested in thinking of ways that feminist/queer activists and educators might
strategically apply existing images and discourses to promote cultural change.
I am aware that the same texts or series of events I see as evidence of productive
or progressive attitudes towards sexual and erotic difference (not to mention
sexual learning) can be read by critics as evidence that hegemonic heterosexuality
will always co-opt and devour anyone who seeks to use its discursive tools and
strategies. For example, in chapter four I discuss the recent history of feminist
porn production, arguing that feminist and queer women’s contributions to the
field of pornography have significantly impacted on the ways that mainstream
heterosexual industry represents female sexual pleasure. I offer SIR video’s film
Hard Love and How To Fuck in High Heels as an example of the ways that the
codes and conventions of classic ‘male’ pornography can be adapted by
filmmakers who consciously deploy ethical production practices, in order to create
a product that is both erotically entertaining and a pedagogically useful
demonstration of eroticised verbal communication and sexual negotiation. In
observing that this film won the 2001 Adult Video News award for ‘Best Girl on
Girl’ scene, I conclude that the film represents a successful cross-over of
queer/feminist sexual ethics and aesthetics into a ‘straight’ mediasphere.
The argument against my proposal might be summarised as: porn itself is
intrinsically patriarchal and masculinist, and any porn producer (or porn theorist)
who seeks to demonstrate otherwise is only apologising for, and enabling the
hetero-masculine world-view. Yet this response not only negates the perspectives
28
of the women who produce and consume pornographic texts, but also denies the
possibility of diversity and change within heterosexual masculinity. This is not to
say that feminist/queer porn is inherently subversive or liberating. Indeed, the
insistence within some feminist or left critiques of popular media that seek to
define texts as either hegemonic or subversive are, as Sedgwick observes,
precisely the kind of moralising framework the Foucauldian rejection of the
‘repressive hypothesis’ seeks to avoid (Sedgwick 2003). To reject all feminist or
queer attempts to shift or even colonise classically ‘patriarchal’ cultural spaces
and texts in new or different ways is a paranoid strategy. On one level the strategy
makes perfect sense, since it insures against loss or disappointment if the attempt
‘fails’. On another it shuts down the possibility of acknowledging partial shifts,
rifts and changes within institutionalised spaces and texts. To me, this thinking
can only lead to a political dead end, where anything other than complete social
change is rejected. To paraphrase Sedgwick, even if we are certain that girl/girl
porn scenes like those in the SIR film can be read by heterosexual men as a
confirmation that lesbian sexuality is primarily an erotic entertainment for straight
men (in contrast to gay male porn which can only pose a threat), so what? What
does this reading of men’s responses to porn tell us that we don’t already know?
What does it offer those who strive for social change, other than the consolation
of ressentiment? (see Chapter 2). My aim is not to deny that even politically
dissident texts can be co-opted into dominant paradigms, but to ask what else
popular texts can tell (or teach) their popular and academic readers about sexuality
and gender? Given the intensity and diversity of popular discourses of sexuality, it
29
seems to me that these proliferating modes of sexual story-telling have a great
potential for strategic deployment as activist or educational tools. As I will
demonstrate, these popular texts do much more than convey ‘good’ or ‘bad’
messages about sex and gender. By actively provoking affective responses in the
forms of arousal, disgust, fear and excitement they offer avenues for
micropolitical change, presenting multiple possibilities for sexual identification
and sexual practice.
Sexual practices and sexual identity are topics that excite, inspire, produce anxiety and
provoke conflict. The question of how identities and practices intersect in everyday life,
and why these intersections might matter, are central questions in popular culture.
Representations of sexual interactions fuel media industries. Although it has been argued
that media and popular culture is becoming increasingly ‘sexualised’, I would argue that
representations of sexual norms are a central aspect of popular culture because, as
Foucault has argued, they have become central to our understandings of our ‘selves’. The
mediated voices of sexual expertise and experience in popular culture are an important
part of many people’s self-recognition as sexual subjects. Far from presenting a cohesive,
seamlessly normalised image of sexuality, the media and popular culture increasingly
represent a diversity of sexual experiences and identities. To evaluate popular texts in
exclusively moral terms – that is, to consider them primarily in relation to ‘good’ or ‘bad’
representations of sex and gender – forecloses their potential as tools for teaching and
learning about changing sexual practices and sexual subjectivities.
30
Chapter 1
Problematising heterosex
It is only through the radical toleration of experimentations that these can be
tried out and measured against experience, and it is only through continuous
dialogue that these can be properly tested. The condition for this, in turn, is
the recognition that the best means of continuing the dialogue is the
endorsement of the values both of belonging and difference. Practices of
freedom require no less. (Weeks 1995:153)
Can heterosexuality be remade without being completely undone? If so, can small shifts
and changes in heterosexual practices and identities (since there are many
heterosexualities) be seen as evidence of this remaking? Heterosexuality is clearly more
than a matter of object choice. As it currently stands, the institutionalisation of
heterosexuality is widely seen as naturalised. Yet I assert that many heterosexuals are
already actively participating in the deinstitutionalisation of heterosexuality, through the
self-artistry of their sex and relationship practices, which are not ‘organised around the
repudiation of homosexual unions’ (Connolly 1999: 144). As William Connolly argues,
following Foucault and Nietzsche, self-artistry is not necessarily a self-serving or self-
indulgent act. In fact, self-artistry is an integral micropolitical process, a key factor in
creating constituencies which support macropolitical change. For instance,
31
‘heterosexuality’ is layered with political meaning for those who do, and do not, identify
as heterosexual. Broadly, heterosexuality may be defined through its assumed
participants (male/female romantic couples), assumed sexual practices (vaginal
intercourse), or assumed social status and associated privileges (superannuation benefits,
etc). However, it may also be seen as an undesirable and pervasive political force to be
vigilantly avoided, whether this avoidance takes the form of refusal to participate in any
act of penetrative sex or refusal to open a joint bank account (Weeks 1995).
There is a widespread demand for the deinstitutionalisation and destabilising of
compulsory heterosexuality. Yet feminist writing has been less than constructive when it
comes to suggesting how these changes might take place. Feminists of the 1970s sought
to deinstitutionalise heterosexuality by adopting particular styles of self-presentation and
‘feminine’ behaviour while avoiding others. As some feminists identified penetration as
heterosexual (and therefore heterosexist) sex, many heterosexual and lesbian feminists
sought to not just privilege other forms of sexual contact but to proscribe penetration of
any kind as anti-feminist. By the mid-1990s, however, there were very few feminists (or
feminist-inspired sex advisers) recommending or proscribing particular practices.
However, as I will explore in Chapter 3, various forms of self-presentation and sexual
expression were still politicised and subject to considerable popular feminist debate.
Throughout this thesis I will argue that it is counter-productive for feminists to continue
to insist that certain images or practices are incontrovertibly or transparently sexist or
heterosexist while others are not. Rather than ranking or hierarchising sexual practices
according to politico-moral categories, I will argue that heterosexuality can be, and is
32
currently being, denormalised through a diverse range of everyday practices. In making
this argument, I will rely not on an unpacking of the differences between men and
women, or straights and gays, but on an exploration of the proximities and similarities
between these groups.
It seems to me that both feminists and anti-feminists have united in calling for an
idealised, institutionalised model of ‘good’ or moral sexuality, which is defined as
private, monogamous, non-commercial, long-term, and genitally focused. However, I see
a space for an opening up to deinstitutionalised heterosexuality in the kinds of practices
and images that are often rejected by moral understandings of sexuality. As I will
demonstrate, many heterosexuals behave in non-institutional fashion: they have public or
commercial sex, they are not monogamous, they have short-term (even fleeting)
relationships, and they are fetishistic and non-genitally focused in their sexual practices.
That is, they are not ‘normal’.
These practices are not in and of themselves ‘pro-feminist’. However, I will argue that
they are as worthy of respectful, ethical feminist consideration as changes in practices of
marriage, partnering and child-rearing. Even partial, imperfect changes are changes. In
addition, I will argue that sexual representations are as worthy of ethical consideration as
‘real-life’ sexual interactions. In making these arguments, I am not trying to claim that
these micropolitical shifts are ‘revolutionary’. Clearly, they do not represent complete
and utter shifts in mainstream sexual attitudes, and those who indulge in alternative
heterosex practices may be conservative and/or reactionary in terms of their personal
33
politics (as, of course, can gays and lesbians). However, the increasing visibility of non-
compulsory heterosex represents not just a ‘queering’ but a distinct denormalisation of
heterosexuality, and heterosexuals.
Yet, although there has been some limited recognition of the capacity for men and
women to practice non-normative forms of heterosexuality, the most popular
theorisations of these changes have reinscribed normalisation even as they conceive of
change. Anthony Giddens’ concept of the ‘pure relationship’ has been highly influential,
yet it contains very little recognition of the diversity of heterosexual sex (as opposed to
heterosexual relationships). Although he explores the notion of ‘plastic sex’, he does so
largely in the context of gay and lesbian relationships. In this chapter I will consider the
feminist critiques of sex and relationships which I believe have contributed to Giddens’
‘blind spots’, and suggest different models of thinking about shifting heterosexualities.
Drawing on William Connolly’s examples of Foucauldian ‘self-artistry’, I will argue that
it is possible to recognise moderate shifts within heterosexual representation and practice
as significant aspects of micropolitical process. Viewed through the lens of micropolitics,
the meanings of sexually explicit texts are open to contestation, and offer possibilities for
productive reworkings. However, in order to explore these possibilities, I will first revisit
the history of feminist theories of heterosexuality in general, and sexually explicit media
in particular.
Heterosexuality and feminism
34
While early second-wave feminists certainly challenged commercial sex media, they did
so in the context of a much broader critique of institutionalised heteronormativity. As the
slogan ‘the personal is political’ indicates, early feminist opponents of sexism argued that
power imbalances between men and women existed both in ‘public’ (media
representations, workplaces, public policy, etc) and in ‘private’ (within the home and the
family itself). Both public and private manifestations of this power imbalance were seen
as the product of various social circumstances, and as subject to change. Importantly,
public and private manifestations of institutionalised heterosexuality were seen not
simply as oppression imposed on women, but as sites in which women themselves had
invested a great deal of energy and resources.
Strategies and proposals for change varied according to political affiliations and trends in
theory and activisms. However, by the late 1980s, feminists who organised under the
banner of ‘radical feminism’ were most identified with the position that opposed public
expressions of sexuality (particularly in commercial pornography). As with sex work,
feminist opposition to pornography, and other forms of sexual representation, was (and
continues to be) framed largely in moral terms. Small changes in the nature of public
sexual imagery, or differences within pornographic genres, are minimised. Images and
texts are considered to be both direct evidence of broader social power imbalances and,
more dangerously, instructional material that perpetuates these imbalances by not only
normalising but eroticising them. Campaigns against pornography have been so
popularised that opposition to sexually explicit material has come to represent the
feminist position in the popular imagination. However, there have been, and continue to
35
be, many feminists who wonder why, as Carol Vance put it, “the hyperbolically described
multi-million dollar pornography industry called for a single-issue protest campaign and
eradication in a away that the multi-million dollar bridal industry did not” (1992: xix).2
But, although opposition to sex work, sexual experimentation and sexually explicit
imagery has come to stand for the ‘feminist party line’, this has not always been the case,
nor, of course, is it currently the case that all feminists support this position.
Paradoxically, it seems to me that it is the success of feminism that has created this
misunderstanding. In arguing that feminism has been ‘a success’, I am not claiming this
success has been complete or uncontested. Yet when so many previously ‘radical’
demands have been adapted as sensible or moderate issues for popular discussion it is
impossible to discount feminism’s impact. In the broadest terms, feminism’s critique of
heterosexuality has had an impact on almost every level of Australian life. As Verity
Burgmann puts it, the once-radical feminist demands for “equal pay; equal opportunity in
employment; access to affordable, good-quality childcare; access to safe and legal
abortion; equal opportunity in education; and an end to sexism … in society generally”
have, in the main, become ‘reasonable’ (2003: 103-104). Although sexism has not been
vanquished, the other demands have been adapted (in various forms) into recognisably
‘moderate’ policies by all major political parties in Australia.
The women’s movement of the late 1960s and early 1970s was deeply concerned with
critiquing the structure of the family and marriage itself (including, but not restricted to,
divisions of domestic and emotional labour, such as housework and childcare). These
2 Ellen Willis’ 1992 collection No More Nice Girls makes a strong case for a radical feminism that doesn’t require an anti-porn stance.
36
challenges to the structure of heterosexuality included a critique of sexual relationships
which involved questioning the basis of heterosexual and lesbian women’s ideals and
experiences of pleasure, desire and relationships. Influential texts such as Kate Millet’s
Sexual Politics (1970) and Shulamith Firestone’s Dialectic of Sex (1970) aggressively
critiqued the naturalising of sexist heterosexual relations, which were seen to occur not
just in fiction, philosophy and media representations but, crucially, in everyday practices
of mating, marriage and childrearing. Radical feminists particularly challenged the
system of what came to be known as ‘compulsory heterosexuality’ (Rich 1980), in which
women were forced to either contract their unpaid sexual, reproductive, emotional and
domestic labour to one man through marriage, or be outcast and condemned as ‘fallen
women’ or ‘whores’ (whose sexual services were implicitly the property of any man who
chose to access them).
As Ellen Willis (a 1969 co-founder, with Shulamith Firestone, of the New York-based
Redstocking collective) observes, early radical feminists (among other cultural radicals)
were adamant that the ‘nuclear family’ was a key aspect of heterosexism. In addition to
challenging men’s rights to access women’s bodies sexually, feminists called for
alternative family models that offered women and children more autonomy, without
forcing reliance on a patriarchal male provider. Writing in 1985, Willis invoked the
(already, in her words, ‘forgotten’) 1970s debates around the family as follows:
All kinds of radical ideas got a serious hearing: that children should be
considered members in the community, rather than wards of their parents;
that they are properly a collective responsibility; that every child ought to
37
have a guaranteed right to be supported and genuinely cared for. Some of us
envisioned a society organized around communal households, in which
adults as a matter of course were committed to sharing childrearing, whether
or not they had biological children. (1992: 88)3
It was not just the nuclear family and childrearing conventions that were open to critique.
Romantic love and monogamy (even outside of formal marriage and family structures)
were subject to critique and interrogation. As the contemporary slogan ‘You begin by
sinking into his arms, and end up with your arms in his sink’ indicates, love and
monogamy were viewed by many feminists as snares or lures that lead women to collude
with the patriarchal institutions.4 And these lures were not only recognised within
‘mainstream’ relationships; alternative or counter-cultural models of heterosexual
relationships were also open to challenge.
While the Left (in Australia and elsewhere) had championed sexual liberation (primarily
via the ideas of Freud and Reich), politically active women in the late 1960s and early
1970s experienced increasing dissatisfaction with their male comrades and lovers. While
access to the Pill allowed women the freedom to be more sexually active without the fear
of unwanted pregnancy, the feminist attention on the power within even ‘alternative’
experiences of domestic life, reproduction and sexuality led to increasing rifts between
radical men and women.5 Consciousness-raising groups sought to explore the everyday
3 This article was written in 1985, but is part of Willis’ collected essays published in 1992. 4 In her 1983 book The Hearts of Men, Barbara Ehrenreich observes that men in post world war two America were also critical of romantic love and monogamy – for quite different reasons. 5 For more on the 1970’s Sydney women’s movement’s attempts to engage with, and differentiate itself from the sexual politics of broader Left and bohemian/libertarian movements see Coombs 1996. For
38
realities of women’s sexual experiences. As the institutional structure of ‘sexism’ was
identified and critiqued, the taken-for-grantedness of heterosexual relationships was
called into question. At the same time, the role of lesbians within the women’s movement
was challenged by those who sought to protect or redeem the image of feminism from
those who sought to pigeonhole all feminists as ‘man-haters’.6
Lesbian feminists understandably reacted angrily to homophobia within feminism, and
feminism in Australia and elsewhere increasingly became divided on the politics of
sexual identity, sexual conduct and relationships. As the movement progressed, these
divisions became more and more apparent, as feminists identified less with a generalised
‘women’s movement’ and more with particular distinct ideological strands within
feminism (these were heavily influenced by work of feminists in the UK, and particularly
the US). Although not every self-identified feminist allied herself with these groupings,
the primary strands throughout the 1970s and 1980s came to be known (in Australia at
least) as liberal feminism, radical feminism and Marxist or socialist feminism (Burgmann
2003). While there were, of course, numerous similarities among the various groups,
there were substantial differences in their approaches to the politics of sexuality, coupling
and living arrangements.
In an attempt to isolate (and move away from) sexist or ‘male-centred’ sexuality,
feminists sought to identify particular sexual practices (such as penetration) as
metonymically standing in for broader institutionalised heteronormativity. Drawing on
diverse critiques of the broader popular ideologies of the ‘sexual revolution’ see Altman 1992, Segal 1985, 1994, Jeffreys 1990, Willis 1992. 6 Accounts of conflict between lesbian and heterosexual feminism are offered in Segal 1994 and Smart 1997.
39
Anne Koedt’s pamphlet The Myth of the Vaginal Orgasm, feminists of the early 1970s
increasingly identified penetrative sex as “the glue that holds up the patriarchal order”
(Campbell in Wilson 1985). This led to a difficult and often painful situation for
heterosexual and lesbian feminists, in which sexual practices and desires (even when
practised exclusively between women) were proscribed and restricted by appeals to a
political morality which defined penetrative sex, butch/femme roleplay and BDSM
(bondage and discipline/dominance and submission/sado-masochism) sex between
women as ‘heterosexual’ and therefore male-identified.7
Some parties in the debate (particularly in the 1970s) judged heterosexuality harshly,
publicly denouncing it as anything from sleeping with the enemy to legalised prostitution,
masochism and/or patriarchal brainwashing. In this context, heterosexual women became
identified as ‘traitors’ to the cause of feminism, or at best ‘dupes’ of patriarchy, as in Rita
Mae Brown’s statement:
Straight women are confused by men, don’t put women first. They betray
lesbians and in its deepest form, they betray their own selves. You can’t
build a strong movement if your sisters are out there fucking with the
oppressor (quoted in Echols 1983).
7 These issues became central in what came to be known as the ‘Lesbian Sex Wars’. Pat Califia 1992 offers an extended, and quite bitter account of the US version in the Samois collective’s Coming To Power. Other accounts are offered in Vance (ed) 1992, and in Anne Snitow, Christine Stansell and Sharon Thompson’s introduction to their 1983 collection Desire: The Politics of Sexuality. The Australian version of the ‘sex war’ is not quite as extensively documented, but Kimberly O’Sullivan offers an account in her 1997 article ‘Dangerous desire: lesbianism as sex or politics’.
40
Of course, numerous feminist writers proposed an alternate view of heterosexuality,
pointing out the ways that men and women can and do relate sexually without
reproducing ‘normal’ gendered power relations. But, in contrast to lesbian writing on
sexuality, many heterosexual theorists seemed to be almost wistful in their evasion or
denials of any real, embodied attraction to or desire for sex with men.8 Heterosexuality’s
‘supporters’ seemed defeated by the confusion and conflict which heterosexual
relationships provoked for feminists. As British writer Carol Smart puts it, there were
times (particularly in the early 1980s) when “it was as if there were really only two
available positions; one which seemed to gloat over the mistakes of heterosexual women
and one which seemed to apologise for being heterosexual” (Smart 1996: 168).
Writing in 1983, Alice Echols observed that the position of heterosexual feminists
had been transformed within the women’s movement to the point where they were
“defined now as victims, rather than traitors” (1983: 58). Feminism, for Echols, was
at this time largely dominated by those she termed ‘cultural feminists’, whose
definitions of sex and gender reflected traditional ‘feminine values’. According to
Echols:
... cultural feminists distinguish between patriarchally-conditioned femininity
which they associate with passivity and submissiveness, and female nature
which they assume to be nurturant, tender, and egalitarian (1983:51).
8 As lesbian writers such as Joan Nestle and Pat Califia have pointed out, this disavowal of female/female desire de-sexualised lesbians, by defining them as ‘political lesbians’ or 'women-identified women', rather than women desiring women.
41
Among cultural feminists, Echols lists contemporary anti-porn activists, such as Andrea
Dworkin, Catharine MacKinnon and Robin Morgan, whose writings suggested any act of
sexual penetration (between any combination of partners) could be (and should be)
constructed as simultaneously heterosexual, heterosexist and degrading.9 For these
feminists, pornography represented a literal template for heterosexual oppression, in the
form of the sexual degradation of women.
In her introduction to her overview of the sexual revolution, Anticlimax, radical feminist
Sheila Jeffreys leaves no doubt as to her version of this argument:
Sex as we know it under male supremacy is the eroticised power difference of
heterosexuality. As a political system heterosexuality functions more perfectly
than the oppressive systems such as aparteid [sic] or capitalism. In heterosexuality
what we have accustomed to see as the wellsprings of our pleasure and happiness,
love and sex, are finely tuned to depend on the maintenance of our oppression ...
The last chapter considers how we can move beyond heterosexuality as a political
institution and the form of desire, heterosexual desire, which derives from it
(1990: 3-4).
Like Dworkin and MacKinnon in North America, Jeffreys has had significant input into
legislative debate. Interestingly, all of these feminists have publicly lobbied against
‘sexual violence’ rather than heterosexuality per se. However, they have not always made
their theorisation of the interconnectedness of ‘conventional’ heterosexuality and sexual
violence entirely clear. These feminists were successful in gaining support from
9 See Cole 1992, Dworkin, 1982, MacKinnon 1994.
42
legislators precisely because their public voice was not framed as a general opposition to
heterosexuality, nor did they threaten to challenge heteronormative family structures, or
inequitable workplace or childcare practices. Any opposition to heterosexism was framed
only as an opposition to ‘bad’ or ‘public’ sexual practices, rather than the broader
problem of institutionalised heterosexuality.
While radical feminists of the 1970s had opposed heterosexism across a number of fronts,
the anti-porn campaigners from the 1980s onward presented a moral opposition to
pornography, sex work and other forms of public sex that meshed well with the more
conservative ‘family values’ legislators of their day (particularly in the Reagan and
Thatcher administrations). They argued that images of sexual practices were harmful in
and of themselves as both representations of, and incitements to, further violence against
women. While they may have linked these forms of harm to institutionalised
heterosexuality, they did not challenge the central institution of heteronormativity: the
nuclear family.
Consequently, in the late 1980s, radical critiques of love, monogamy, nuclear families
and privatised childrearing were no longer seen as central to feminist concerns.10 Clearly
the bulk of heterosexual women (even those who identified as feminists) were continuing
to negotiate sexual relationships with men, including those that involved cohabitation,
childrearing and even legal marriage. It was recognised within feminism that, although
feminism had not managed to smash sexism, it had opened up options for many women
10 As I will discuss in the next chapter, many lesbian feminists were vocal critics of compulsory monogamy and the ‘nuclear’ family, even after the critique of monogamy had become a fringe issue within feminism. Celeste West’s 1996 Lesbian Polyfidelity presents a politicized self-help model of lesbian theories and practices of non-monogamy, including an extensive reading list.
43
to live their heterosexuality differently. While not all choices met feminist ideals, there
were no public calls to ban marriage or the family. Even though feminists continued to
challenge institutionalised violence or the abuse of women and children within marriages,
they did not argue that women had ‘colluded’ with their oppressors by choosing to enter
into heterosexual relationships and have children. Nor were women who spoke publicly
about their happiness within marriage (or dyadic, monogamous love relationships outside
of marriage) derided as apologists for patriarchal institutions. Marriage and other
normative family structures are certainly still questioned by contemporary feminists.
However, there seems to be a much more generous acknowledgment of the context of
everyday relationships, and recognition of the small shifts and changes through which
normalised relations are reshaped. In contrast with ‘all or nothing’ feminist moral
oppositions to commercial and public sex, ‘private’ or ‘domesticated’ heterosexuality and
the nuclear family (which is of course still ‘public’ in a very real sense) are addressed in
ethical terms. However, as I will demonstrate, the space through which changes in
everyday practices of heterosexuality are understood is still relatively narrow, and
dependent on the frame of moral outsider categories. It is interesting to contrast feminist-
inflected theoretical and popular discussions of ‘relationship’ and ‘family’ with
theoretical and popular framings of ‘public’ or ‘commercial’ sexuality. In the first case,
even fairly conservative theories are relatively generous and open to diversity, or
deviation from traditional heteronormative frameworks. In the second case there is far
less space for recognising modest adjustments to relationship structures, or partial shifts
in ‘acceptable’ attitudes and behaviours. As I will demonstrate, although feminists from
the 1970s onwards actively produced and consumed sexually explicit material, it was the
44
queerer feminist theorists who were most concerned with resisting moralising in order to
challenge normativity.
Queer theories of heterosexuality
Queer theory draws on feminism to argue that heterosexuality has been normalised to
such a degree that it functions as an oppressive, unspoken ‘centre’. In order to maintain
its sense of ‘silent majority’, however, this centre requires others (lesbians, gays,
bisexuals, etc) to function as marginal minorities. These margins are constructed and
understood in symbiotic relationship to the centre. That is, the centre must understand its
identity as centre by virtue of its difference to the margins. Likewise, the marginalised
may embrace these perceived (or actual) differences as markers of identity. So, the
institution of ‘normal’ heterosexuality is constructed, in Gayle Rubin’s terms, as a
“charmed circle”, which marks and is delineated by sexual and social practices, and by
codes of speech, and silence.11 Unlike ‘cultural’ feminism, queer theory does not posit
‘patriarchy’ as the organising and overriding source of sexual and social inequality.
Instead, it considers the means by which inequalities are structured through the tendency
to normalise ‘difference’. In the process of normalisation, differences between men and
women, or between hetero and homo, are overinscribed by discounting any and all
similarities; and these differences are then hierarchised. As Eve Sedgwick argues
compellingly in The Epistemology of the Closet, “people are different from each other”,
and there is a great deal more to sexuality than one’s gender, or one’s preferred “object
11 In her influential article Thinking Sex, Rubin specifically takes up feminist framings of sexuality as primarily structured through gender, and suggests that sexual practices and identities may have a greater impact on the ways that sexualities are hierarchised in the context of Western ‘systems of sexual judgment –religious, psychological, feminist or socialist’ (1992: 282).
45
choice” (1990: 22). As Sedgwick observes, while the male/female and hetero/homo
binaries are seen as the signifying structures in western discourses of ‘sexuality’, there
are many others that could be posited as ‘primary’ differences. Sedgwick observes, for
example, that, “For some people the possibility of bad sex is aversive enough that their
lives are marked by its avoidance; for others, it isn’t” (1990: 25).
Yet within both psychoanalytic and feminist frameworks of thinking sex, the differences
between man/woman and straight/gay are presumed to stand in for, and erase, all other
possible differences (or combinations of difference and sameness) that might exist
between sexual partners. Even where significant changes in the structure of heterosexual
relationships are recognised, the possibility of samenesses and differences between
straight and gay sex may be overwritten by these binaries of man/woman and
straight/gay.
The project of queer theory could be defined as ‘anti-dualistic’ (although, as Sedgwick
(2003: 2) wryly observes, such a stance in fact creates a new dualism – the pro and the
anti). As Michael Warner puts it “queer theory offers a way of basing politics on the
personal without acceding to pressure to clean up personal identity” (1993: xxvii).
Inconsistencies, shifts of register, paradoxes and contradictions of sexed and gendered
identity and self-presentation are not ‘problems’ that obscure ‘authentic’ gender/sex
identity, since, as Butler famously observes, all representations of gender and sexuality
are in themselves performances or copies for which there is no authentic original (Butler
1990, 1993). Rather than seeking to understand sex and gender by means of a series of
boundary mapping exercises (male sexuality versus female sexuality, heterosexuality
46
versus homosexuality), queer thinking allows a space for thinking through the multiple,
overlapping aspects of sexed and gendered subjectivity. In this context, the work of
theorists such as Judith Butler or Eve Sedgwick offers a means of thinking through the
specificities of heterosexual practices and identities which does not require a constant
moral/political weighting of ‘good’ (feminine or feminised) versus ‘bad’ (masculine or
masculinised) sexual practice. This approach is particularly useful when considering the
various samenesses and differences that constitute not just sexual practices, but modes of
conducting sexual and/or romantic relationships.
The pure relationship
Sociologists such as Jeffreys Weeks and Anthony Giddens have utilised feminist and
queer theory to argue that postmodern (or late modern) western cultures have allowed a
shift in the structure of the relationship itself. This has been linked to many factors, from
feminism to industrialisation, but is broadly recognised in terms of its results: an
increasing resistance among both heterosexuals and homosexuals to institutional
heterosexual marriage, particularly in relation to gendered divisions of domestic and
emotional labour. Instead, many are aiming for a ‘pure relationship’, which does not
feature reproduction, obligation and duty as central or compulsory ‘family values’.
There is a widespread cultural acceptance of what Giddens terms ‘plastic sexuality’, or
sexuality that is understood to take place principally for the purposes of pleasure rather
than reproduction. As Giddens notes, plastic sexuality is similar to the psychoanalytic
model of ‘perverse’, or non-reproductive sexuality, specifically defined in Freud’s Three
Essays on Sexuality (1992: 112). For Giddens, plastic sexuality is a modern phenomenon,
47
that “has its origins in the tendency, initiated somewhere in the late eighteenth
century…to limit family size” (1992: 2), and is linked to the spread of reproductive
technologies such as the contraceptive pill. Plastic sexuality, Giddens observes, “can be
moulded as a trait of personality”, and thus forms a precursor to the “pure relationship”
(1992: 2). According to Giddens:
A pure relationship is one in which external criteria have been dissolved:
the relationship exists solely for whatever rewards that relationship itself
can deliver. In the context of pure relationship, trust can be mobilised only
through the process of mutual disclosure. Trust, in other words, can by
definition no longer be anchored in criteria outside the relationship itself –
such as criteria of kinship, social duty or traditional obligation. (1991:6)
The pure relationship, then, does not depend on, or answer to, outside authorities such as
church or state in order to define or perpetuate itself. The status and role of each partner
is negotiated and adjusted according to the needs and desires of the partners themselves.
Since the primary aim of the pure relationship is the mutual satisfaction of all partners, it
is, by necessity, entered into (and dissolved) voluntarily. This factor leads Giddens to
propose that such a relationship represents a “democratisation of the interpersonal
domain” (1992: 3) affording women significantly more agency and power than the
traditional marriage contract. Giddens argues that the ideal of romantic love both enables
and restricts the pure relationship. On one hand, it can be argued that romantic ideals
undermine women’s ability to negotiate the circumstances of a relationship, tied as they
are to narratives of traditional marriage and ‘homemaking’ (see Chapter Two for further
48
discussion of feminist debates around romantic love). On the other, Giddens argues that
romantic love can be viewed as “active and radical”, since in the context of a pure
relationship, such a love “presumes that a durable emotional tie can be established with
the other on the basis of qualities intrinsic to that tie itself” (1992: 2).
According to Giddens, pure relationships are possible between men and women as a
result not only of feminist critiques of traditional marriage and kinship structures, but also
as a result of heterosexual men’s willingness to surrender to the “realm of intimacy”
(1992: 45-47). This openness allows the ideals of romantic love to be translated into what
Giddens terms “confluent love”, a more “active” and “contingent” condition, in which
“love … only develops to the degree to which intimacy does, to the degree to which each
partner is prepared to reveal concerns and needs to the other and be vulnerable to the
other” (1992: 62). Unlike romantic love, Giddens argues, contingent love depends on
erotic reciprocity, and thus “develops as an ideal in a society where everyone has the
chance to become sexually accomplished” (1992: 63).
Plastic sexuality is a core component of the pure relationship, since it not only allows for
sex to be uncoupled from the process of reproduction, but foregrounds the role of sexual
pleasure as a bond within intimate relationships. As Weeks describes it:
… the ‘pure relationship’, dependent on mutual trust between partners, is both a
product of the reflexive self, and a focus for its realisation. It offers a focal point
for personal meaning in the contemporary world, with love and sex as the prime
site for its attainment (2000: 214).
49
Giddens’ terms and definitions, drawn from feminism and gay and lesbian theory, are
indeed useful frameworks for discussion of contemporary heterosexual relationships.
They do, however, reflect some feminisms more than others – Giddens’ views on sexual
practices show a strong liberal and radical feminist influence, with leanings towards a
very Oedipal psychoanalytic perspective. His opinions regarding the role of ‘alternative’
modes are tempered by these influences, despite his efforts to approach what he presents
as specifically gay and lesbian sexual practices from a non-normative and non-restrictive
perspective. So, gay men who have sex with multiple partners are considered to be
different to heterosexual men who practise ‘episodic sexuality’ (or serial sex outside or
instead of a one-to-one relationship). Straight men are considered to have this kind of sex
in “an unconscious effort to reclaim and subdue the all-powerful mother” (Giddens 1992:
141), while “among homosexuals non-monogamous sex is typically carried on with the
knowledge and acquiescence of the partner or very quickly comes to the other’s
awareness” (1992: 142).
In Giddens’ terms, “a pure relationship has nothing at all to do with purity [but] refers to
a situation where a social relation is entered into for its own sake” (1992: 58). It seems to
me that the crucial factor here is not the motivation behind non-monogamous practice,
but the degree of negotiation and adjustment which is entered into. After all, Giddens
asserts that the pure relationship “is continued only in so far as it is thought by both
parties to deliver enough satisfactions for each individual to stay within it” (1992: 58). If
plastic sexuality assumes equality between partners, then is it not possible that both men
and women may negotiate alternative sex practices? Giddens does recognise this
possibility in his discussion of lesbian relationships, and most positively in regard to gay
50
men’s “everyday experiments” with bathhouse sex. “By its very nature”, he argues,
plastic sexuality “permits power only in the form of sexual practice itself; sexual taste is
the sole determinant” (1992: 147). By this I understand Giddens to mean that power
games are acceptable in sex, but not in other aspects of intimate relationship.
Putting aside the question of whether any relationship can ever exist outside of power,
there seems to be a kind of double standard at work when only same-sex partners are
recognised as moving into the realms of plastic sexuality through their sexual practices.
Giddens’ discussion of pornography, for example, clearly relates exclusively to
heterosexual pornography, which he links to the “turbulence and troubles” of
heterosexual masculinities and the problem of women’s “complicity” (1992: 118).12 In
contrast to troubled hetero eroticisms, Giddens presents various gay male erotic personae
(“the macho gay, the leather queen, the denim groupie”) as “a visible deconstruction of
maleness”, affirming that “in modern social life, self-identity, including sexual identity, is
a reflexive achievement” (1992: 147). By following this line of argument, Giddens is, in
a sense, splitting his theoretical loyalties. He adheres to a ‘classic’ radical-feminist-
influenced analysis of heterosexual sex and gender, while taking a more postmodern
approach to gay men – that is, crediting them with the ability to ‘perform’ masculinity
rather than be performed by it.
I do not seek here to deny the political power of contemporary gay and lesbian sex
culture, but I do see a problem if heterosexuality is to be pathologised in psychoanalytic
terms using the same argument through which homosexuality is depathologised and
12 Unsurprisingly, Giddens credits Andrea Dworkin in this chapter
51
depsychologised. It seems very shortsighted to argue, as Giddens does, that episodic
sexuality offers a potential for “pleasure and fulfilment” solely to gay men and lesbians,
who are somehow immune to, or unaffected by, any of its “compulsive characteristics”
(1992: 147). Likewise, it seems naive to insist that fetishised gay performances of
masculinity are always free from the ‘trouble and turbulence’ which apparently dogs
heterosexual relations. I would argue that Giddens finds it easier (and possibly safer) to
‘see’ knowing gender performance and pleasure in ‘perverse’, plastic sexuality in gays
and lesbians, where he is able, perhaps, to imagine relationships that are free from
‘power’. In fact, he makes this ambivalence explicit in his discussion of gay and lesbian
BDSM, which, he argues, represents “the return of the phallus ... in a somewhat
obnoxious form” (1992: 143). But where radical feminists such as Sheila Jeffreys and
Andrea Dworkin might insist that even same-sex powerplay is inherently ‘heterosexual’
(since, according to Jeffreys (1990), heterosexuality itself is the eroticisation of a power
imbalance), Giddens takes on a kind of Foucauldian understanding of BDSM, seeing it as
a way to play or experiment with an “instrumental control of formal power” which would
otherwise be “prohibited in pure relationships” (1992: 144). How, then, are we able to
determine if and when relationships between men and women are pure? Giddens is open
to the idea that same-sex sexual practices may not always mean what they may appear to
mean. At the same time, The Transformation of Intimacy is not exclusively an
exploration of same-sex relations – many of Giddens’ examples of pure relationship and
plastic sexuality refer to heterosexuals. It appears that ‘perverse’ heterosex (gender play,
SM, multiple-partner relationships, porn, commercial sex, etc) is excluded from pure
relationships, and always (only) represents “the return of the phallus”.
52
There is an assumption underpinning much of Giddens’ work that the pure relationship is
implicitly non-commercial, and completely ‘privatised’. Without reference to outside
authority, there is an understanding that the plastic sexuality of those engaged in pure
relationships takes place almost exclusively within the home (although Giddens does
acknowledge non-monogamous lesbian couples, and gay men who have beat or bath-
house sex). The heterosexual couple in a pure relationship, however, reflects Foucault’s
model of ‘the Malthusian couple’, whose sexuality is private and unspoken (in contrast to
the disgraced and disgraceful ‘public’ sexuality of the criminal or pervert). Where
Giddens acknowledges ‘desexualised’ forms of sex or gender play (among gays and
lesbians), he views these in Oedipal terms as a “re-inscription of the phallus” (1992: 143).
Like his feminist antecedents, Giddens is relatively optimistic and generous in his
thinking on monogamous, dyadic heterosexual relationships, even though he
acknowledges that they may be brief and imperfect. His arguments, however, seem to be
troubled by heterosexual relationships which incorporate aspects of previously
marginalised practices such as episodic sex, ‘perversion’, sex work and public sexual
display.
Thinking ethics
Giddens is limited by his reliance on the normalising frameworks of psychoanalysis and
Dworkinesque feminism, which view heterosexuality in moral, rather than ethical, terms.
But what does it mean to think about ethical sex in relation to everyday heterosexual
practices? William Connolly’s model of ‘micropolitics’ is particularly useful and
productive here. In contrast to Giddens, I assert that these forms of non-reproductive (but
53
not anti-reproductive) or impure relationships represent a gradual shift in public
discourses of heterosexuality. They are forms of what Connolly has termed micropolitics,
or practices of self-artistry which reshape heterosex in relation to queer sex and queer
identities without repudiating either straightness or gayness. Connolly (1999: 145)
emphasises that micropolitical practices are by definition “modest and experimental”,
evoking Week’s and Giddens’ description of the “everyday experiments” of pure
relationship and plastic sexuality. These experiments in the practices of everyday life,
Connolly argues, are never fixed or finalised, but constantly vary according to “the
settings and distinctive materialisations already in place” (1999: 145). Thus, ‘new’ modes
of heterosexual practice necessarily reflect the old. Heterosexual practices can never be
completely ‘different’ to the institutionalised or compulsory model, but neither are they
the same. When practised consciously, these everyday experiments in heterosex represent
what Connolly calls “the selective desanctification of elements in [one's] own identity”
(1999: 146, original emphasis). They represent a willingness to rethink the essence of
identity, and to relinquish the privileges of the centre. (Of course, this willingness can
certainly coexist with self-righteousness, guilt, and/or bloody-minded revolutionary zeal
– in both straights and gays).
Certainly, heterosexuals (like homosexuals) can be sexually outrageous while clinging to
reactionary political views, and I am therefore wary of claiming all sexual experimenters
as either burgeoning or closeted heterosex radicals. Yet, as Connolly makes beautifully
clear, micropolitical changes do not necessarily take place in a conscious or
predetermined fashion. Sometimes self-artistry is a ‘ripening’ process, where a fixed
assumption such as “monogamous heterosexual coupledom (with a limited range of
54
permissible sexual expression) is not only natural, normal, but ought to be the desirable
organising model for all human relationships” is undermined and shifted, but not through
a process of revolutionary consciousness raising, or via macropolitical legislation. Rather,
this shift takes place gradually and reflexively, as “one part of [an individual’s]
subjectivity ... begins to work on other parts” (1999: 146, original emphasis).
Connolly illustrates this process through the example of an individual’s personal ethical
shift from opposing euthanasia in all cases, to support of the right to die, and in order to
fully explore the potential offered by Connolly’s model, I will cite his discussion at
length. In this example, the shift is not immediate, nor is it entirely prompted by political
pamphleteering, campaigning or proselytising (although these strategies certainly have
their place in political struggles). In fact, the subject in Connolly’s example is initially
shocked and morally confronted by campaigners calling for doctor-assisted euthanasia.
Yet, as “the shock of the new demand dies away ... concern for the suffering of the dying
... opens a window to new possibilities” (Connolly 1999: 146). Importantly, Connolly
notes that this consideration of new possibilities proceeds cautiously. The individual’s
concerns opens the individual to alternate viewpoints: from “a film in which the
prolonged suffering of the dying becomes palpable” to “friends who have gone through
this arduous experience with parents who pleaded for help to end their suffering” (1999:
147). This exposure precipitates a reconsideration of personal beliefs regarding “divinity
and nature” (1999: 147), and, even where firmly held personal beliefs continue to be
‘persuasive’, a curiosity regarding the foundations of others’ beliefs creates spaces and
opportunities for “uncertainties and paradoxes” to emerge (1999: 147). These
uncertainties in turn may allow for a reconsideration of previously incontestable
55
assumptions, and a conflict within the self. As a result, “what was heretofore
nonnegotiable may now gradually become rethinkable” (1999: 147). Importantly, the
subject who has gone through this slow, cautious process of reappraising their attitude to
euthanasia continues to interact with others, “seeking to spur them to similar bouts of
reappraisal” (1999: 147).
In Connolly’s example the new political stance is not seen as ‘opposite’ to the old. It is a
product of a process which can always be read in terms of the original point of departure,
where a belief or sexual practice was considered to be non-negotiable yet became open to
renegotiation. The previously homophobic or misogynistic subject who becomes open to
sexual difference through a process of dialogue will always retain the memory (and
possibly an understanding) of the thoughts and feelings which made up the original
sensibility. They are not their ‘old’ self, but they are not entirely ‘new’. An ‘ethos of
engagement’ is formed, where stances are no longer seen as natural, universal or eternal.
In fact, the reshaped identity itself is not fixed – it is still and always becoming, “and
always in need of repair or revivification along one dimension or another as new and
surprising issues are pressed upon it” (Connolly 1999: 156) For example, a subject who
has come to sufficiently desanctify their heteronormative identity to accept gays and
lesbians as colleagues and friends may still be shocked or confronted by same-sex
marriages, or by reports of a rise in reported instances of unprotected anal sex among gay
men. However, where cautious, modest experiments are acknowledged as valid political
moves, then it seems to me that the desanctified heterosexual is more likely to “listen
more attentively to a new and disruptive claim” (1999: 151). While this is not the only
possible strategy for social change, it is a strategy which has been undervalued in the
56
more extreme feminist debates around sex, gender and heterosexuality. As Connolly
argues (following Foucault), “the goal of self as modest artist of itself needs to be neither
to discover a true self underneath ... sedimented layers nor to create the self anew entirely
by oneself” (1999: 150). As Connolly also comments:
The key thing, the thing that makes this an example of self-artistry in the
interests of critical responsiveness rather than merely reformation of an old
pile of arguments, is that it involves movement back and forth between
registers of subjectivity: working now on thought-imbued feelings, then on
thought-imbued intensities below the reach of feeling, now on received
images of death and suffering, and then on entrenched concepts of divinity,
identity, ethics and nature (1999: 147-148).
This process presents a productive model for a process of rethinking feminist analyses of
heterosex practices. The subject (or self) moves through different levels of thought, affect
and action. Connolly does not hierarchise these movements, or promote one stage of this
movement as being fundamental to the next. Nor must the movement be ‘complete’ or
final. In emphasising the cautious approach the self takes to these ‘modest shifts’ in
position, Connolly presents a model for a complex and personal engagement with the
ambivalence and paradox of sexual politics which contains an inherent generosity
towards the self and others.13
13 Rosalyn Diprose uses the term ‘corporeal generosity’ in her re-thinking of both liberal and radical feminist thinking of sexual relations. Diprose argues that “not only is generosity most effective at a carnal level, rather than as a practice directed by thought or will, but the injustice that effects its organisation is governed by the way social norms and values determine which bodies are recognized as possessing property that can be given and which bodies are devoid of any property…”(2002: 9).
57
Shifts in thought are moderated by shifts in feeling. Intense and sometimes surprising
reactions may occur in relation to seemingly minor reappraisals. As Connolly notes, the
subject practising this form of micropolitical self-artistry must review “the effects of
previous experiments before going on” (1999: 148). As with Connolly’s example of the
right to die, debates around sexual practices and sexual representations occur “on several
registers” (1999: 148) and are never simply the product of some abstract form of pure
thought. Emotions such as arousal, fear, shame and disgust underpin our political
sensibilities: “Since thinking operates on several registers of being, and because each
register is invested with a set of feelings or intensities, to change your thinking is to
modify to some degree the sensibility in which it is set” (1999: 148). Therefore, these
modest shifts offer less a model of ‘being’ a different kind of heterosexual, and more a
mode of ‘becoming’ – a process which does not have a clear before or after.
So, to echo Connolly’s model, a subject may be deeply attached to a particular model of
heteronormativity which depends on homophobic and/or misogynistic contempt for
particular kinds of sex and relationship. They may express this position in an abhorrence
for all forms of ‘deviant’ behaviour, which could be represented by anything from anal
eroticism to single parenting. Yet this subject’s thoughts and feelings can shift over time:
an advice column in a magazine, a news commentary on the Clinton/Lewinsky scandal, a
group discussion of Sex and the City in the pub, a private conversation with a gay co-
worker – all these various cultural influences may begin to produce exactly the kind of
‘critical responsiveness’ that Connolly refers to. As the subject’s thoughts and feelings
Diprose observes that women’s bodies, and consequently their capacity for corporeal have been devalued. However, she does not argue that women cannot be acknowledged as having the capacity for erotic generosity in the context of sex-work.
58
shift, they may also be drawn to representations or personal expressions of
heterosexuality which are not conventionally ‘straight’. The previous rigidity of the
heterosexual identity is eroded as the subject moves “back and forth across the zones
because each infiltrates the others” (Connolly 1999: 148). Each new exchange or
conversation is influenced by previously held convictions, but these are being gradually
modified as the subject opens to new pleasures and suffering; and is affected by the
reported or observed experiences of both pleasure and suffering which are evident in
others. This is not an overnight conversion but a gradual relational shift in which
perceptions of self and others interact to create unpredictable outcomes in personal and
political sensibility.
As Connolly observes, once this political becoming has commenced, there is no way of
predicting (or controlling) the ripples of change through “school, army, office, church,
corporation, neighbourhood, or family” (1999: 148). The heterosexual who has begun to
question, and accordingly desanctify, their identity will not necessarily go on to write
letters, organise rallies or draft legislation. However, having questioned a previously
‘sacred’, central mode of being, they are able to recognise difference as something other
than a threat to their identity and become part of a micropolitical movement which will
allow both grassroots activism and formal legislative change to take place. New ‘rights’
cannot simply be enforced by acts of parliament. Micropolitical changes must prepare the
ground so that demands for new rights, and other forms of social change, can take root.
This model of micropolitical change through self-artistry offers a way out of the
frustrating cul-de-sac presented by many feminist arguments (particularly as advanced by
59
Dworkin and MacKinnon) where both representations and actual sexual practices are
read as transparently ‘demeaning’ or ‘degrading’, and women who enjoy these practices
are said to ‘collude with their own oppression’. It also sidesteps the cycle in which each
new claim of ‘transgression’ is discounted as incomplete, or disallowed as ‘patriarchy
under another guise’. As I will explore in my case studies, popular representations of
heterosexuality need not be read in moral terms as transparently positive or negative
images. They can be seen as evidence of shifts that have already taken place, or
challenges to entrenched sexed and gendered identities. It is not necessary for every
consumer to understand the image in the same way. Indeed, it is not necessary for every
consumer or audience member to have a rational or cognitive reaction to a particular
image. Images and texts can be understood affectively (and cumulatively), in context
with other texts, events and feelings. Their impacts are not always clear or
straightforward.
My endorsement of modest experiment is not by any means a call for conservatism or
respectability. On the contrary, I consider ethical commercial and/or non-commercial
sexual experimentation to be a valid (but not essential) form of micropolitical self-
artistry, whether or not the participants (or producers/consumers) consider themselves to
be pro-feminist, anti-homophobic or sex-radical. The way heterosexuals perform (or
perhaps just do) sex and gender is explicitly political and ethical – not in the sense that
radical feminists might argue that particular practices or sex roles have concrete, fixed
meanings in terms of politicised moral codes, but in the sense that sexual practices are
practices of the self. If non-normative sexual activities are practised with “a curiosity, or
desire to know that is motivated and captured by differences” (Gillan 1998: 42), but
60
without a desire to establish a fixed centre (which can only be defined by excluding
difference), then it is possible to see them as ‘practices of freedom’ in the Foucauldian
sense. From this perspective, it is possible to argue that domestic exhibitionists, amateur
pornstars and other non-normative heterosexuals are indeed part of a micropolitical
movement which is desanctifying and decentring heterosexual identity through
heterosexual practices.14
As Weeks (2000), Plummer (1995) and others have argued, sexual communities and
sexual identities are shaped by the stories we tell about ourselves. Although relatively
few non-normative straights could be definitively said to be consciously working against
the institutionalisation of heterosexuality, they are publicly telling new stories about
themselves and their specific heterosexual identities. These stories, whether told in
words, in photographs, or on video, are changing perceptions of straight ‘sexual
citizenship’ (Plummer 1995). It is more than coincidental, then, that these new stories of
heterosex are proliferating in what Giddens (1992) has called “the transformation of
intimacy”, where “the relationship, whether marital or non-marital, heterosexual or
homosexual, becomes the defining element within the sphere of the intimate, which
provides the focus for everyday life” (Weeks 2000: 214). Where heterosexuality is
presented differently – as queer, as perverse, or simply non-normative – it can serve to
undo the ‘legitimacy’ of heterosex, which was, according to Foucault, given the right to
‘more discretion’ in response to the pathologisation of gays and lesbians in the eighteenth
and nineteenth centuries (1991: 38).
14 Although some of these practioners may be misogynist and/or homophobic.
61
When a camera is brought into the Malthusian couple’s most private space – the bedroom
– and sexual activities are performed explicitly for an audience (on the internet, or
through amateur video swap clubs), the scene is no longer that of Giddens’ pure
relationship. Another person, or persons, has been invited into the supposedly private
relationship, whether or not actual physical contact takes place. The heterosexual couple
can no longer define itself in relation to deviant others (sex workers, gay men at beats,
etc) who have ‘paraded’ their sexuality in public, and therefore forfeited their rights and
legal protections. This change is not, of course, complete, nor does it guarantee explicit
support for the rights of hitherto discriminated against and despised sexual identities. In
fact, lines may be very carefully policed to ensure a domestic pervert’s difference from
the ‘real whores’ or the ‘real queers’. Yet the wide dissemination of images and
discussions of different heterosexualities cannot be explained away as the emperor’s new
clothes. As Connolly explains, “micropolitics works at the level of detail, desire, feeling,
perception and sensibility” (1999: 149), and, at this level, change is already taking place.
At the present time, ‘deviant’ heterosexuals are not always willing to drop the ease of
‘passing’ in order to come out as a despised minority within the so-called centre.
However, the blurring of private and public sexualities and gender identities which is
evident in news groups, on sex sites and in swingers magazines marks the kind of
micropolitical shift which allows organised activism to take place. As Michael Hurley
points out, “Mardi Gras didn’t begin in the boardroom or Stolichnaya’s marketing
department, just as transgender rights, hate crime legislation and anti-discrimination laws
didn’t begin in the caucuses of political parties” (2001: 245). The Stonewall riot, widely
considered to be the formative moment of gay liberation, was itself a micropolitical
62
revolution. After all, the drag queens and trannies that resisted the police raid on the bar
did not intentionally go there to fight for gay rights, or protest against the policing of
unjust laws. They had gathered to drink, socialise, and mourn the death of Judy Garland.
Yet in a moment of crisis they made the political decision to fight, rather than submit to,
police action. What does this represent, if not the political importance of sexual
community in the slow development of “feeling-imbued thought, and thought-imbued
feeling”?
Many seem to concur with Jeffreys Weeks’ proposition that “the dominant belief in the
non-heterosexual world is that lesbian and gay relationships offer unique possibilities for
the construction of egalitarian models” (2000: 220). Yet same-sex couples (like different-
sexed couples who wish to develop egalitarian modes of relationship) have been raided in
a world of institutionalised heteronormalcy. Although, as Weeks puts it “many lesbians
and gay men have consciously shaped their relationship in opposition to assumed
heterosexual models ... there is plentiful evidence as well, inevitably, that egalitarian
relationships do not automatically develop” (2000: 221). In the words of one of Weeks’s
interviewees, “Everything has to be discussed, everything is negotiable” (2000: 221).
Same-sex couples are never ‘the same’; there are always differences of age, class,
education, cultural capital, income and ethnicity which must be recognised and
negotiated, not to mention different expectations regarding day-to-day divisions of
emotional labour, childcare, and/or household maintenance. Nor, of course, are the sexual
imaginations, needs, desires and expectations of a same-sex couple ever guaranteed to be
‘the same’.
63
It is this queer critique of the exclusionary model of family and community which in turn
offers heterosexuals a way out of institutionalised heterosexuality. As Weeks points out,
“despite all the hazards, and the force and weight of institutionalised pattern, people do
create relationships of mutual care, respect, responsibility and love” (2000: 244). While
there is no general heterosexual community (since heterosexuality is assumed to define
‘community’), microcommunities of heterosexuals are by necessity specific.
Heterosexuals who wish to actively desanctify their heterosexual identity and form
ethical engagements with other communities may develop cultures along non-normative
models, but these cultures will always contain elements of the normative. However,
radical or alternative sex cultures present opportunities to de-essentialise gender, and
decentre normative models of sexual pleasure and practice. These sex cultures have the
power to become ‘necessary fictions’ – specific micropolitical communities. These
communities in turn are not closed, but form relationships with other communities
through the multiple, overlapping micropolitical practices of the self described by
Connolly:
… films, family memories, social movements, dietary regimens, marches,
dream work, medical techniques, gossip, medications, curriculum
organisation, talk shows, identity performances, material disciplines and
rewards, sermons, leadership techniques and rituals (1999: 148).
In this context it is not only possible but probable that public heterosex presents a form of
ethical engagement. The privacy of the heterosexual couple’s domestic space is being
made public on the web. Heterosexual ‘amateurs’ (and celebrities) are emulating
64
pornstars by creating home-made porn for public display. The sexual story of
heterosexual citizenship is shifting, revealing more and more evidence of what might
more accurately be termed ‘impure relationships’. These forms of heterosexuality are by
no means explicitly politicised, nor are they adequately described by theories of
‘transgression’ or ‘liberation’. However, traditional theories of sadistic male gaze, and
deluded female complicity, of the ‘reinscription of the phallus’, are also inadequate in
many cases. Heterosexual pleasure and desire is not deconstructed by these cultural
phenomena, but it is certainly decentred and desanctified. The very publicness of this
eroticism – the creation of online communities of amateur pornographers, the growth of
‘pro-am’ porn, the deprivileging of gender roles in BDSM subcultures play – indicates a
‘fall from grace’ for normalising institutions of heterosexuality. In order to think about
what these different sex cultures might be able to do, it is necessary to break the reliance
on moral systems for understanding sexual interactions, and think about the ways that
these cultures might reflect and encourage ethical sensibilities among heterosexuals. In
the next chapter I will revisit feminist debates around heterosexual relationships, and look
at the ways that old debates around the role of monogamy can be reframed in the move
from moralism to ethics.
65
Chapter 2
Ethical sensibilities of heterosexuality
Opposite sex bonding per se is not the complete package. Even if we are
in a heterosexual relationship there are many other social conventions we
are expected to build upon it: marriage, house-owning, children, tax
incentives, dinner parties, social success and being ‘normal’, being able to
join in everyday conversations (Rosa, quoted in Van Every, 1995b: 40).
To acknowledge the ‘social conventions’ of heterosexuality reveal is to also acknowledge
that straightness is not as normal or straightforward as its positioning in some feminist or
queer arguments might imply. For some, heterosexuality is defined by socially
recognised privileges and conventions, such as the right to have a partnership recognised
administratively as marriage, resulting in benefits such as shared superannuation benefits.
For others, heterosexuality is recognised as the right to display affection in public. For
others again, heterosexuality is implicit in shared domestic life, and financial
interdependence. This creates immense difficulty for those in same-sex relationships who
are “not necessarily avoiding dyadic relationships, but trying consciously to do them
differently in opposition to assumed heterosexual models” (Weeks 2000: 221). One
couple interviewed by Jeffreys Weeks in the context of his research into gay and lesbian
families, for example, avoided opening a joint bank account, claiming it would be “too
66
heterosexual” (2000: 222). For many gay and straight couples, however, “house-owning,
children, tax incentives, dinner parties, social success and being ‘normal’, being able to
join in everyday conversations” come (to a degree) with the territory. Despite the
assertions of sociologists such as Anthony Giddens (see the previous chapter) and Jo Van
Every, same-sex partnerships do not automatically imply an unproblematic financial or
social ‘equality’. In fact, Weeks’s interviewees cited inequality of income (and earning
capacity) as “the most divisive factor” in their relationships, particularly when it came to
home-owning and sharing expenses (2000: 222).
This chapter draws on the thinking of Michel Foucault to consider the ways that the
limits of ‘liberationist’ models of sexual relating can be pushed and expanded if sex is
refigured as a question of ethics rather morals. In exploring the sexual ethics of the
Greeks and Romans, Foucault aimed not to reveal a prior, better mode of subjectification
that modern sexual subjects might imitate or emulate, but to explore the historical
changes in ethical and moral understandings “which might suggest possibilities in the
present” (Rabinow in Foucault 1994: xxvii). While not entirely rejecting the politics of
liberation, Foucault pointed to liberation’s limits. Where practices of freedom were (and
are) prevented by “economic, political and military means”, then part of the political
project must be resistance to, and liberation from, these existing conditions. This
liberation, however, is a necessary preliminary. It does not provide ‘an answer’ but a new
set of questions. As the second-wave feminists discovered, it was not enough to become
‘liberated’ from traditional heteronormative constraints. Having, in their own terms,
“turned [themselves] inside out in efforts to shed ideologies of the family, monogamy,
jealousy, romantic love and dependence” (Campbell & Charlton quoted in Van Every
67
1995a: 2), 1970s feminists and political activists were frustrated by “the lack of rules and
criteria available to help negotiate the new contexts in which traditional relations,
expectations and modes of behaviour had been called into question” (Nava in Van Every
1995a: 2).
As Sue Cartledge writes, the feminist/socialist attack on monogamy was not made on
pragmatic grounds, in that it did not work, but on moral grounds. Monogamy “was
ideologically wrong, for all sorts of reasons”, and not just among heterosexuals
(Cartledge 1983: 174). While rejecting many aspects of the leftist ‘sexual revolution’,
some advocates of ‘political lesbianism’ also “took over unchanged from the [1960s]
counter-culture a vehement opposition to monogamy” (1983: 189). This resistance to
“possessiveness, jealousy, couples and exclusiveness” was, according to Elizabeth
Wilson, based in a de-emphasis of the role of sexual desire and pleasure in lesbian
relationships. This “rejection of romantic love and its basis in intense sexual passion”
aimed to replace the closed romantic dyad with a more communitarian “revolutionary
comradeship” (1983: 189). This comradeship too became idealised, argues Wilson,
operating as a moral imperative at times. This moralism provoked “immense guilt, rage
and pain” in those women who were unable to conform (1983: 189), as is illustrated by
the following extract from Cartledge’s consideration of her own attempts to grapple with
feminist approaches to monogamy:
1980: Cathy and I are locked in a fruitless argument about morality. She
accuses me of selfishness, consumerism towards other people, that
wanting to sleep with others is behaving like a man (worst of crimes). And
68
I scream back that she is a narrow-minded moralist, what could be more
male than her possessiveness, wanting to tie people down and own them?
(1983: 176)
While it is clear from Cartledge’s example that moralism was considered the antithetical
to feminist sexual liberation, 1970s discussions of sexuality tended, she argues, to
become moral debates “about how everybody should act” (1983: 177). The external
standard was not ‘god’ but ‘feminism’, or even the abstract concept of ‘liberation’ itself.
According to Foucault, liberation “paves the way for new power relationships, which
must be controlled by practices of freedom” (1997: 284-285). That is to say, non-
monogamous couples cannot liberate themselves from feelings of jealousy, and
heterosexuals cannot simply liberate themselves from heteronormativity by proclamation,
or force of willpower. They must practise freedom on a daily basis, by asking and re-
asking themselves the questions that emerge in everyday life. It is this constant process of
reflection and readjustment which constitutes a Foucauldian ethical sensibility, given that
“ethics is the considered form that freedom takes when it is informed by reflection”
(1997: 284).
Good and bad sexualities
While few feminists would agree with Sheila Jeffreys that heterosexuality is, by
definition, “the eroticisation of a power imbalance” (and all such eroticisations are
heterosexual), there are many who still seem to theorise heterosexuality as a moral
struggle of female sexual ‘good’ against male sexual ‘evil’. And if good and evil seem
69
too strong to be used in the context of liberal and/or feminist discussions of heterosexual
behaviour, then, as Foucault demonstrates, other terms may be comfortably substituted:
[W]hen a judgement cannot be framed in terms of good and evil, it is
stated in terms of normal and abnormal. And when it is necessary to
justify this last distinction, it is done in terms of what is good or bad for
the individual (quoted in Connolly 1993: 367).
And should an individual woman protest that it is up to her to decide what is good for her
sexually, then she is very likely to be reminded of her duty to the collective moral and
political category of ‘women’.
In this way, feminist opposition to heteronormativity and/or compulsory heterosexuality
has been framed in primarily moral terms. These moral terms are not necessarily
religious, or even scientific; the higher authority which is appealed to is as likely to be an
abstract political principle such as ‘equality’ (which is not to say that religion and science
are not in themselves political). This political appeal to moral principles does however
rely on the assumption of an absolute authority, a fixed marker against which
relationships, sexual practices and other forms of everyday conduct can be measured. So,
for example, a feminist moral understanding of sexual practices may demand an
externally measurable equality between partners. In order to measure the equality of
differing relationships, a hierarchy of practices and subject positions must be determined,
and fixed in place to facilitate comparison. For example, a practice such as vaginal
intercourse must be hierarchised to determine the ‘fairness’ of the act – the insertive
70
partner is deemed ‘active’, and therefore dominant, the receptive partner is deemed
‘passive’, and therefore submissive.
How might an ethical heterosexuality be crafted? How could it be recognised and
developed? Connolly (1993) argues that a Foucauldian ethical sensibility is politically
productive precisely because it confronts our commonsense understandings of 'good and
evil'. The challenge within this ethical framework is to understand ‘evil’ not as the act of
individual criminality or deviance, but as “the undeserved suffering imposed by practices
protecting the reassurance (the goodness, purity, autonomy, normality) of hegemonic
identities” (1993: 366). Clearly, the institution of heterosexuality functions precisely in
this fashion, and it is for this reason that it must be opposed. But the difficulty for
feminism has been the seeming contradictions and tensions which arise when particular,
specific heterosexual relationships must be negotiated in the context of this opposition.
How can these relationships and interactions be seen as both part of and separate to the
overreaching institution? The challenge is, as David Halperin puts it, to:
divert our attention from spectacles of transgression which agents of
normalisation routinely stage ... and instead to dramatise, as Foucault did,
the conventionally more discreet operations of the disciplinary mechanisms
themselves. (1995: 145)
Following Halperin (and Foucault), I argue that the success and utility of gay and
lesbian critiques of heteronormativity is not due to any intrinsically liberated or
liberating sexual subjectivity, but rather that gay/lesbian/bi/trans identity
represents “a strategically marginal position from which it might be possible to
71
glimpse and devise new ways of relating to oneself and to others” (1996: 68).
When seen from these marginal positions, ‘compulsory’ heterosexuality is not a
monolithic edifice or unified whole; rather it is the sum of a number of parts
which can be explored, unpacked and renegotiated. The more ‘discreet operations’
of heteronormativity must be examined in their specificity; it is not sufficient to
assume we know what heterosexuality is now, and what its ‘opposite’ might be
(as if such a thing were possible in the first place). If oppositions to
heteronormativity are always partial and incomplete, perhaps this is a result of
heterosexuality’s own ‘phantom’ existence. What is heterosexuality, after all? Is it
the sum of any number of closed, isolated couples, or nuclear families? Is it
comprised of all breeders (even parents in same-sex relationships?) Should all
those who propose to resist heterosexism follow the lead of Weeks’s interviewees
and eschew joint bank accounts? Must all sex be ‘equal’? Is penetration out of the
question?
Queering heterosexuality?
My suggestion that heterosexuality might be ‘queered’ is not without precedent. It draws
on Halperin’s definition of queerness as “an identity without an essence, not a given
condition but a horizon of possibility, an opportunity for self-transformation, a queer
potential” (1995: 79). It might seem that this is a call for straights to jump on the
‘alternative’ bandwagon (after all, everyone knows the queers throw the best parties).
This is not my intention. As I see it, the queering of heterosexuality demands a conscious
72
relinquishing of what has been termed ‘heterosexual privilege’. I am suggesting that
heterosexuals who subject their desires and practices to an ethical interrogation lose their
rights to pass as ‘normal’. The process of ‘becoming’ ethically heterosexual demands a
certain sacrifice of moral certainty, a relinquishing of the right to appeal to a higher
authority of sexual and relational ‘order’. For feminist politics, the challenge is to avoid
replacing old moral certainties about men and women with new ones. As Connolly
argues, “to reach ‘beyond’ the politics of good and evil is not to liquidate ethics but to
become ashamed of the trancendentalization of conventional morality” (1993: 366).
While morality presents an ordered set of rules, which may be prescriptive or
proscriptive, the concept of ethical sensibility offers a more ambiguous model for
heterosexual relations. Morality relies on the possibility of an appeal to an abstract
authority, be it God, equality, government or real feminism. To behave in a moral fashion
is to know what is allowable and what is forbidden, and to be able to measure eone’s
conduct against an external scale of possible actions. Morality is, above all, a process of
judgement – of the self, and of others. Moral orders are “implicitly installed in narratives
of nature, identity, gender, sexuality, agency, normality, responsibility, freedom and
goodness” (Connolly, 1993: 366). Thus, sexual moralities provide clear external
boundaries around sexual and emotional conduct, and assist in distinguishing acceptable
sexual practices and partnerships from those that are unacceptable. With their inherent
promises of rewards for the sexually virtuous, and punishments for the sexually corrupt,
religious and political moralities bring with them a comforting certainty. The very fact
that alternative (or ethical) sexual practices and partnerships do not and cannot promise
certain fixed outcomes is, for the adherents of moral codes, proof of the failure of ethical
73
sensibility. However, both the demand for and promise of guaranteed rewards and
punishments are in and of themselves part of the structure of moralities and moral orders
(Connolly, 1993: 372).
Interestingly, Connolly argues that to move from the certainty of moral judgement
towards the ambiguity and contingency of ethical sensibility is “to subject morality to
strip searches” (1993: 366). As Connolly notes, the strip search is not without cruelty.
Strip searches are invasive, seeking to reveal what has been hidden not only on the body
but within it – in the most private, shameful, pleasurable places. The move towards a
politics based on ethics rather than morals is exceptionally cruel (from the moralist’s
point of view) because morality itself is designed to place its political adherent in a
position of absolute safety, beyond all shame, ambivalence and reproach. Within
differing moralities, the ‘obvious’ outcomes may of course be quite different. For
example, a particular kind of moral feminist may choose to avoid identifying as
‘heterosexual’, but still have sex with, or live with, a man (e.g. Andrea Dworkin’s
partnership with John Stoltenberg). Another may call herself heterosexual, and have sex
with men, while carefully avoiding particular immoral (or demeaning) sexual practices,
which may be variously defined.
Why ethics of heterosex rather than morals?
In Connolly’s (and Foucault’s) terms, an ethical sensibility is that which shapes, and is
shaped by, a politics of care and curiosity. The ethical self does not assume to already
know the other. So, for example, while a heterosexual moralist might reject a particular
sex partner, sexual practice or mode or relationship in accordance with an understanding
74
of hierarchies of ‘good’ and ‘bad’ sexualities, a heterosexual operating according to
ethical sensibilities is more likely to proceed (with caution!) beyond the borders of moral,
political or cultural certainties. That is to say, they are less likely to reject non-
monogamy, BDSM or sex work as ‘patriarchal’ or ‘oppressive’, although they may still
reject them for other reasons. As Connolly puts it, an ethical sensibility relies on the
ethical subject’s willingness to take what they know and look at it differently,
interrogating moral and political categories of “good/evil, normal/abnormal,
guilt/innocence, rationality/irrationality, autonomy/dependence, security/insecurity”
(1993: 379). In terms of a contemporary queer/feminist ethical sensibility, one could add
the willingness to interrogate dualities of egalitarian/exploitative and erotic/pornographic
sexualities, and indeed the moral/political categories of ‘male’ and ‘female’.15
In order to develop an ethical feminist sensibility regarding heterosex, it is necessary
abandon some of the modes of feminist identity politics which have been strategically
employed in the past. De-hierarchising sex/gender identities means giving up the morally
privileged position of ‘oppressed minority’, and the ‘will to powerlessness’ that goes with
it. From this position, as Wendy Brown puts it, “truth is always on the side of the damned
or the excluded; hence Truth is always clean of power, but therefore also always
positioned to reproach power” (1995: 46).
Hierarchised categories of sex, gender and sexual practice, after all, do not simply serve
to prop up institutionalised heteronormativity and white male privilege. They also support
feminist (and gay and lesbian) politics grounded in ressentiment: “the moralising revenge
15 I am thinking here of the moral outrage professed by the likes of Janice Raymond (1979) against trans people who dare to transgress the moral category of ‘woman’.
75
of the powerless”, or “the triumph of the weak as weak” (Nietzsche in Brown, 1995: 66-
67). True, heteronormativity causes a great deal of suffering. However, as Brown argues,
where sexual/social freedom for women is envisaged either as freedom from men or
freedom from sex , then such a freedom is patently informed by an engagement with
power which demands a “reversal of suffering” rather than an undoing of the
social/sexual conditions which currently produce it (1995: 7). As Cartledge argues,
feminist debates on sexuality often centre around a tension between political analysis and
moral imperative:
On one hand ... the more we are oppressed the more we are victims; the
more we are unfree, the less choice we have, and therefore less
responsibility. At the same time, an equally strong thread in feminist
tradition has been the assumption of choice and responsibility for
ourselves and each other, and endless delving and soul-searching for
correctness in motive and action (1983:178).
Cartledge’s narrative of ‘choice and responsibility’ indicates that it is not only the
positioning of women as ‘victims of oppression’ but the very situatedness of feminist
politics within particular moral discourses of liberation and equality which produces
feminist ressentiment. For, as Brown points out, liberalism promises (and incites)
individual liberty, yet also requires that all free individuals be equal in the eyes of the state
(and one another). It is the paradox of liberalism that it demands “the articulation of
politically significant differences” which must then be minimised or suppressed by means
of legislation or tolerance (1995: 67). The liberal subject must ‘make’ their own
76
independent subjectivity – yet they can never fully realise the task, being never fully
independent, but always enmeshed in cultural and political systems. It is, Brown argued,
the liberal subject's “situatedness within power, their production of power, and liberal
discourse's denial of this situatedness and production that cast the liberal subject into
failure” (1995: 67).
Thus, for feminists who explored alternative sexualities in the 1970s, the promise of
liberation was found to be a chimera. Rather than locating the failure in the promise of
liberation itself, a morality based in good and bad (or female and male) sexualities was
developed “to bring the unsatisfactory present into line with the utopian future” (Dimen
1992: 138). When the unattainability of liberated feminist sexuality was or is viewed as
failure of the self, or of strength of political will (rather than the failure of a false
promise), the failed feminist sexual subject must seek to identify the site of blame, and the
failure of complete and universal liberation must be attributed to the strength of the forces
which oppress and victimise women, via the politics of ressentiment.
Within these modes of politics, it is impossible for the suffering or marginalised subject to
relinquish their position as suffering without also relinquishing their claims to redress the
harm done. As Brown (following Nietzsche) puts it, this form of political reasoning must
cling to rage, righteousness and, above all, past hurts: “it can hold out no future – for itself
or others – that triumphs over this pain” (1995: 74). Thus Sheila Jeffreys and Andrea
Dworkin (among others) must continue to insist that there is no model of heterosex (past,
present or future) that does not endanger or degrade women. And when other feminists
counter with tales of specific, different tales of their diverse heterosexual pleasures,
77
theorists grounded in ressentiment must respond with the reminder that “whatever
discourses we produce [on heterosexuality], whatever fantasies we have, they offer us no
protection against the coercive power of the penis enacted as rape” (Jackson 1999: 35).16
While this may be literally true, it reflects a common moralising attempt to police claims
of sexual pleasure with ‘prior’ claims of sexual suffering, despite the fact that “the
coercive power of the penis” is itself discursively produced (and no more or less a fantasy
than heterosexual pleasure). And, as Elspeth Probyn argues, there is no reason “why the
employment of a term like ‘discourse’, for instance, should block or preclude one’s
sympathies for the bodies that are worked over by any given discourse” (1998: 133).
A feminist discussion of sexual politics which is not grounded in ressentiment must
relinquish claims of female moral/sexual superiority and political certainties based on the
‘differences’ between male and female or straight and queer sexualities. This calls for
strategies of specific, reflexive dialogue, or as Brown terms them ‘public conversations’.
Within such dialogues it is no longer possible to claim a definitive knowledge of the
‘truth’ of female sexuality (or heterosexuality) whereby one proclaims, for example, that
most straight women are demeaned (or at best bored) by penetrative sex; or that most
straight men prefer the active/insertive role, and see it as an act of sexual domination.
These conversations do not involve slanging matches in which the will to political power
is disavowed in a competition for the role of “she who has suffered most under
patriarchy”. Nor do they require a disavowal of specific experiences and cultural
positions and roles. As Brown puts it, these conversations are fuelled by an ethics of care:
16 This example is not included to single out Jackson in particular, rather it is a very typical example of a particular kind of feminist response to those who argue for the recognition of specific instances of female heterosexual's erotic agency.
78
“a vision about the common (“what I want for us”) rather than from identity (“who I
am”)” (1995: 51). This is not to say, however, that the ‘I’ that speaks is ever unbiased or
neutral – after all, the claim to such a speaking position has traditionally been invoked to
proclaim a universal, non-specific identity which reinforced the legitimacy of the (white,
able-bodied, heterosexual male) liberal subject.17 Unlike the common vision put forward
by such a privileged subject (for whom all ‘identities’ are subordinated categories), the
vision Brown proposes is not beyond interrogation or debate, incorporating as it does an
understanding of diverse rather than hierarchised identities, and a necessary “conversion
of one’s knowledge of the world from a situated (subject) position into a public idiom”
(1995: 51).
Thus, an ethical sensibility of heterosex is not necessarily ‘transgressive’, nor does it seek
to ‘celebrate’, ‘empower’ or ‘break the silence’ of female heterosexuality. While it
involves a great deal of crafting and cultivation of the self, this is not aimed at
‘perfecting’ an individual or a particular relationship or family. The ethical self that is
produced is a self which is always in relation with others within a community, workplace,
polling booth or rally. This self engages not with moral certainty but with the diverse
multiplicity of other such selves, in a politics of the possible which does not promise
finite solutions or salvations. The cultivation of ethical heterosexualities offers feminists
a vision of non-normative heterosexuality through which we might, in Brown’s terms,
“learn to contest domination with the strength of an alternate vision of collective life,
rather than through moral reproach” (1995: 68). After all, the moral certainty which
underpins feminist claims that heterosexual pleasure is, by definition, male and requires
17 See Brown 1995: 57.
79
female and/or queer suffering, can only be challenged if we are able to acknowledge that
cultures which encourage the cautious, curious pursuit of ethical heterosexual relations
may exist now, and in the future. As Connolly puts it, “we ... cannot pursue the ethic that
inspires us without contesting claims to the universality and sufficiency of the moral
fundamentalisms we disturb” (1993: 381-382).
Queering relationships
Gay and lesbian relationships are considered to evade heteronormativity for reasons other
than same-sex object choice. All men are not, after all, ‘equal’ to all other men; nor are
all women ‘equal’ to one another. Factors which are considered to be anti-normative
include the manner of dividing domestic tasks; an assumption (or at least acceptance) of
non-monogamy; a willingness to experiment with public sex, and alternative sexual
practices (e.g. group sex, BDSM); and a willingness to blur boundaries of ‘friend’,
‘lover’ and ‘life partner’.18 That is, gay and lesbians are often said to be more likely to
become lovers with friends, and remain friends with a network of ex-lovers. An
expectation that a couple will interact with an alternative ‘community’ based around
strategic alliances, shared tastes and sexual practices is also seen as part of a specifically
non-normative mode of relating.
In a 1981 interview entitled ‘Friendship as a Way of Life’, Michel Foucault addressed the
challenge of creating an ethical sex/love relationship between men outside of the
18 Weeks (1995) is one of the major proponents of this argument within sociology. However Warner 1995, Califia 1992, Easton and Liszt 1997 and others have advanced models of ‘queer family values’ within different discursive frameworks.
80
contractual obligation of the ‘marriage institution’.19 Along with many feminist thinkers,
Foucault observed that classical heterosexual marriage can only function where the
assumption of gender roles is a given, and the wife “accepts it and makes it work”
(Foucault 1997a: 135).20 The ethical task for gay male relationships, according to
Foucault, was the formation of a partnership based on “love where there’s supposed to be
only law, rule or habit” (1997a: 137). That is, it could not (and should not) be assumed
that an older man would be the ‘senior partner’ in a relationship with a younger man, or
that the partner with higher income would (or should) assume the role of breadwinner.
Each individual partnership would negotiate the allocation of tasks and responsibilities in
affinity not just with one another but with a broader network of gay men. To this end,
Foucault called for a ‘gay culture’ based not solely on the reassertion of sexual identity
(or on the celebration of same-sex encounters) but on a continuing process of ‘becoming
gay’. This (potential) ‘becoming’ would demand a continuous reworking of sexual and
political selfhood without reference to normative heterosexual institutions. The process of
becoming gay would, Foucault argued, aim to create:
a culture that invents ways of relating, types of existence, types of values,
types of exchanges between individuals which are ... neither the same as,
nor superimposed on, existing cultural forms. If that’s possible, then gay
culture ... would create relations that are, at certain points, transferable to
heterosexuals (1997a: 159). 19 Carol Pateman's The Sexual Contract (1990) offers another version of this argument. 20 Foucault referred particularly to the work of lesbian feminists Lillian Faderman and Gayle Rubin in this, and other interviews conducted in the early 1980s, and later collected in the 1997 volume Ethics: Subjectivity and Truth
81
Foucault argued that the key questions to ask of oneself within this process of becoming
were not the highly subjective (and perhaps even Oedipal) “Who am I?” and “What is the
secret of my desire?”, but “What relations, through homosexuality, can be established,
invented, multiplied and modulated?” (1997a: 135). The same questions might also assist
those in the process of becoming an ethical heterosexual. What relations can be
established, invented, multiplied and modulated through the ethical practices of heterosex
and relationships, and how might these differ from compulsory heterosexuality and/or
heteronormativity?
An ethical sensibility of heterosex is political, but it is also embodied, with all the
pleasures and pains that embodiment brings. In crafting or cultivating an ethical
heterosexuality one seeks pleasure, yet this pleasure is not guaranteed. This is why I
reject concepts like ‘transgression’ or ‘celebration’ when describing the process – the aim
is not simply to ‘transcend’ the boundaries of hegemonic heteronormative culture but
instead to consciously work on the contingencies of the emerging self that exists in
relation to the culture. The cultivation of an ethical heterosexuality is not, therefore, a co-
opting of a queer or marginalised identity. Queering heterosexuality is not simply a
matter of saying “hey, we’re queer too”. It demands a thoughtful decentring of
straightness, and constant modest advances and acknowledgments of one’s position in
relation to others. Through the process of ethical cultivation one relinquishes the security
of transcendent categories of identity, but it is still necessary, as Connolly puts it, to
develop a “generous sensibility that informs interpretations of what you are and are not”
(1993: 367). Importantly, an ethical heterosexuality does not claim that ‘we’re all the
same deep down’, condescend to the ‘less sexually enlightened’, or assume that all sex
82
and gender differences should and can be resolved in a concrete and final way. Nor is a
liberal ‘tolerance’ of difference required. An ethical sensibility calls for mobile strategic
alliances, not an absolute contract grounded in quantifiable, legislatible equality between
all men and all women, at all times.
Ethical work of this kind offers an opportunity for what Connolly terms “a political ethos
of agonistic care” (1993: 383), where opposing viewpoints and problematics can be
approached through ongoing, adaptive strategies of “interrogation, engagement, and
negotiation, not a political doctrine of intrinsic identity, consensus, and resolution” (1993:
383). In this way, differences not only of sex and gender but also of class, race, age and
physical ability can be negotiated, rather than “overlooked” or legislated into “a purely
formal or procedural equality” (Halperin 1995: 85). In engaging and negotiating with
differences, one aims “not only to prevent them having damaging side effects, but also to
transform them into vehicles of mutual assistance and of communal as well as individual
strength” (1995: 85).
How can these negotiations take place in everyday heterosexual interactions between
men and women? In an anti-normative heterosexuality, sex and love can no longer be
understood primarily in terms of obligation, obedience, duty or compliance. However, it
can be difficult to depart from the model of compulsory heterosex which teaches us that
sex is something that men want, and women must say yes (or no) to, in order to support a
‘relationship’. Although heterosexuality is assumed, the specifics of heterosexual
experimentation and exploration of straight desire and pleasure are not taught particularly
well in our culture, even in formal ‘sex education’. As Ine Van Wesenbeeck puts it:
83
Most young women do practise saying yes or no ... but are much less
skilled in actively shaping sexual practice once they decide on it. They are
often totally nonplussed if ‘nothing happens’, or the boy does not take the
initiative. They have learned to say no, but are much less likely to have
learned to negotiate the sexual encounter to their liking once they say yes
(1997: 177).
In contrast, gay (and lesbian/bisexual/transgender) culture offers models of sex, love and
friendship where sexual pleasure and desire are expected, but not taken for granted.
Negotiation and ‘everyday experiments’ are both supported and encouraged. It is not
surprising, then, that queer sex culture has been highly influential on those heterosexuals
seeking to form ethical relationships.21 As Catherine Liszt demonstrates, gay male culture
offers many ostensibly straight women a strong sense of identification, even where there
is no sense of gay male identity:
I must have been eight or nine, but even then, I understood the subtext of
what I was hearing – that these men didn’t belong in my comfortable
suburban environment, that they had sex with each other in spite of the
fact that many people thought it was wrong for them to do so, that they
didn’t necessarily get married and only have sex with one person, that
21 I do not mean to suggest that it is only gay men who point to the gaps in normative understandings of sex/gender where alternative models of heterosex become imaginable. Since the 1970s lesbian sex radical writers have presented generous discussions of active, desiring, pleasurable female heterosex, notably Joan Nestles 'My Mother Liked to Fuck', which attracted the approbation of radical lesbians (see Nestle in Snitow et al 1983). More recently, Theresa de Lauretis' The Practice of Love (1994) offers a theorisation of 'femme' lesbian desire presents a rare theoretical opportunity for the heterosexual woman to perform her desire in a perverse, 'apparently heterosexual ' context.
84
they had their own communities where they hung out together and took
care of each other because regular people didn’t want them around. And I
immediately had this strong sense of ‘Oh, people like me’ (Easton &
Liszt 1997: 6-7).
Liszt’s recognition of gay men as ‘people like me’ suggests an alliance with
particular practices (city living, non-monogamy, defiance of suburban
conventions of respectability) rather than gayness or maleness. This is not to say
that all gay men live in this way, but rather that ‘gay culture’ or ‘community’ is
clearly recognised in reference to certain practices or modes of conduct – many
explicitly physical and/or sexual.
What might ethical heterosex look like?
In the early 1980s, Foucault asserted that “recent liberation movements ... cannot find any
other ethics than an ethics founded on so-called scientific knowledge of what the self is,
what desire is, what the unconscious is, and so on” (1997: 255-256). The rise of ‘queer’
sex cultures in the 1990s worked against this search for scientific certainty to such a
degree that, by 1997, Catherine Liszt and fellow San Francisco-based author Dossie
Easton were able to write a sexual how-to book which operated within an entirely
different paradigm. As a self-help guide, The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual
Possibilities could be said to directly meet Foucault’s challenge to political sex culture,
where “the problem is not to discover in oneself the truth of one’s sex, but rather to use
one’s sexuality henceforth to arrive at a multiplicity of relationships” (1997a: 135).
85
While some heterosexuals (and non-heterosexuals) seek to meet this challenge by
developing alternative models of sexual ethics through non-Judeo-Christian moral or
spiritual value systems (such as Paganism, Taoism or Tantra), others have chosen to
experiment with more secular but no less complex ethical frameworks for sex and
relationships, such as BDSM or polyamory.22 These lifestyles may appear ‘liberated’ in
many ways, but they are certainly are not ‘amoral’ and/or free from rules and boundaries.
Instead, they present challenging, complex frameworks for constructing ethical
sensibilities in regard to sexual and emotional relationships. The parties in the
relationships may indeed feel that they have added ‘freedom’ – to be non-monogamous,
or to experience extreme forms of physical or emotional contact. With that freedom,
however, comes a degree of ethical reflection and personal responsibility which is almost
unheard of in traditional ‘compulsory’ heterosexual relationships. Polyamorists also
acknowledge the need to attend to the tensions which arise post ‘sexual liberation’.
Where the utopian ideals of the early 1960s and 1970s often produced a climate where
the ideal of ‘open marriages’ really translated into “no admission of jealousy” or “the
appearance of no jealousy” (Slomiak 1995: 13), self-help books such as The Ethical Slut
and Deborah Anapol’s Polyamory: The New Love Without Limits (1997) focus
extensively on the potential complications and conflicts of ‘open’ sexual practices. In
fact, it is this focus on the everyday adjustments and negotiations required to practise
non-monogamy (as opposed to liberating oneself from marriage) that makes polyamory
22 The term polyamory was coined by neo-pagan Church of All Worlds founders Oberon and Morning Glory Zell-Ravenheart, as a replacement for the longer and more unwieldy term 'responsible non-monogamy'. See Zell- Ravenheart in Kaldera (2005). Kaldera offers a useful (although fairly subjective) explanation some of the subtle but significant differences between polyamorous relationships in pagan, tantric and BDSM contexts.
86
particularly interesting as a case study of ethical heterosexuality (although it should be
noted that not all polyamorists are heterosexual). As Weeks puts it:
We all know how difficult it is to live up to standards we have
communally set ourselves. Erotic desire can undermine the firmest
resolutions. Fear and jealousy and betrayal are not abolished because we
disapprove of them. A commitment to safer sex has not stopped unsafe
practices. Friendship can turn to hate, and love, like desire, can die ... So
as well as celebrating eros and the possibilities of community, we need to
begin to spell out what an art of life, an ethos based on reciprocal
independence, means in practice …(2000: 187).
Polyamorists have developed shared vocabularies and community networks that allow
them to attempt this. Although a full discussion of every permutation of the polyamory
movement is not possible here, I offer this discussion of some key self-help texts as a
case study that offers a model of sexuality (including heterosexuality) that values ethics
over morals.
What is polyamory?
Although I have presented sacred/Tantric sex, BDSM and polyamory as distinct entities,
in practice there are those who combine, say, an interest in sexual ritual and spirituality
with bondage and discipline within polyamorous relationships. For the purposes of my
argument, however, I will focus largely on the ethical sensibilities of the polyamorous
and polyfidelitous specifically as they are reflected and constructed in the most popular
87
publications and primers produced by US polyamorists: Polyamory: The New Love
Without Limits, The Ethical Slut, and Loving More Magazine.23 While Anapol’s book
primarily presents advice from a Tantric/philosophical perspective, Easton and Liszt’s
framework of sexual ethics for polyamory or polyfidelity draws heavily on observations
of gay cruising/group sex and BDSM etiquette.
Although all three authors are therapists (Anapol has a PhD in clinical psychology), their
approaches are markedly different to traditional moral/scientific sex/relationship advice
(and its contemporary ‘Mars and Venus’ manifestations – see Potts, 1998). It could be
argued that these texts should be approached with critical suspicion, given that they can
be read as a re-iteration of the normalising, confessional imperative of tradition
psychotherapy identified by Foucault in his History of Sexuality Volume One (1978).
However, given that therapeutic or self-help discourses are (with pornography) the
primary modes of representing sexual practices and sexual subjectivity within
contemporary Western popular culture, I am unwilling to dismiss these examples out of
hand. Partly, this is due to my preference for the reparative strategy, which encourages
me to move beyond the recognition that these texts could and perhaps do cause sex to be
“put into discourse” in ways that potentially limit or constrain the groups or individuals
described within them (Foucault 19878: 11). I accept that there is no ‘outside’ of
discourse, but having acknowledged this fact, I have to ask what else might these texts
23 LovingMore's website www.lovemore.com also informs my arguments – particularly the debates on the LM bulletin boards. The discussion boards reflect the debates in LM magazine, however, the latter seems to be considered by participants to be private, while the former is public. Given the ethical gray area presented by on-line support groups and bulletin boards, I have chosen not to quote directly from the community posts themselves, but only from the more 'public' areas of the site.
88
do? In addition, I believe that there are some significant differences between poly self-
help texts, and the medicalised discourses of scientia sexualis documented by Foucault.
These differences do not simply stem from the obvious resistance to compulsory
heterosexual monogamy, but from a major shift or relocation of subjective sexual ‘truth’
from fixed sexual identities to fluid, changeable sexual practices.24 Relationship models
such as ‘play partner’ or ‘fuck buddy’ (which might at one time have been seen as
exclusively relevant to gay or S/M culture) are presented in The Ethical Slut as easily
translatable, and not specifically linked to particular psychological ‘types’ or sex/gender
identities. While Anapol’s explanation of polyamory reflects her experiences of spiritual
teaching and psychotherapy, Easton and Liszt (1997: 55) attribute their ethical framework
to a broad queer culture of “ancestors and antecedents”: lesbians, gay men, transgendered
people, bisexuals, swingers, sex workers and ‘sacred sluts’ or practitioners of Tantra.
These forms of ‘alternative’ sexual relations are of course not new among heterosexuals,
particularly heterosexuals who came of age in the late 1960s and early 1970s. The
authors of The Ethical Slut freely admit to being ‘ageing hippies’, partial to good old-
fashioned free love. These strategies are of course not twentieth-century developments –
they have antecedents in the utopian political and religious movements of nineteenth-
century Europe and North America (see Ramsdale & Dorfman 1985; Snitow, Stansell &
Thompson 1984).25 These movements continued to influence small intellectual and
24 Not that this very optimistic aim is always achieved. 25 As Ellen Carol DuBois and Linda Gordon note, there is a considerable feminist history of 'sex-radicalism'. Notable 19th century feminists such as Emma Goldman and Margaret Sanger were among those who ‘slept with men without marrying...took multiple lovers...became single mothers...[and]...had explicitly sexual relationships with other women' (1992: 41). British socialists and working class 'agitators'
89
radical communities into the early twentieth century. Greenwich Village ‘bohemians’, for
example, openly conducted and documented the open multiple-partner relationships (as
opposed to clandestine affairs) in which they sought “sexual fulfilment combined with
personal intimacy” (Trimberger 1984:170).
Contemporary models of ‘alternative’ heterosexuality have benefited not only from this
sex-radical history but also from the increasingly ‘coalitionist’ sex communities which
have emerged from queer sexual politics. Under the umbrella of polyamory, alliances are
formed which cross traditional boundaries of gender and sexual identity. So, for example,
a man who self-identifies as bisexual and polyamorous within the context of a 20-year
monogamous heterosexual marriage finds himself at a Tribe Seekers conference where
“many of the other folks were transgendered, seriously into the S/M scene, and bedecked
with various piercings and tattoos” (Cobb 2001:17).
In Polyamory, Anapol describes what she calls “new paradigm” relationships based on
flexible ground rules. These rules are not laid down by an outside authority (such as
church, state or guru) but are established in practice, through the interaction of each
individual partner’s needs and wishes (Anapol 1997). While the terms ‘polyamory’ and
‘polyfidelity’ (sometimes described as group marriage)26 were coined as convenient
descriptors for a broad set of behaviours, they are sometimes discussed within poly media
as if they were prescriptive identities. Given that poly identity politics seem to have the
potential to become as entrenched (and potentially restrictive) as those based on sex, also drew a connection “between sexual monogamy and the acquisitive mentality fostered by private property” (Snitow, Stansell and Thompson 1984: 6). 26 Anapol defines polyfidelity as “A lovestyle in which three or more primary partners agree to be sexual only within their family. Additional partners can be added to the marriage with everyone's consent” (1997: 9).
90
gender or object choice, the somewhat New Age descriptor ‘new paradigm’ seems to
offer the greatest opportunity for a multiplicity of relationship styles, even within
monogamous dyads. As a correspondent to Loving More magazine describes it, to call
these alternative forms of relationship ‘new paradigm’ rather than specifically ‘poly’ is to
allow “autonomy inside a world of many options for intimacy, each of which is valid and
respectable”.
In Anapol’s terms, old paradigm relationships are often grounded in what Foucault might
term ‘quasi-judicial’ morals; that is, there is always an ‘ideal’, whether it is based in
church, state or leftist political principles, to which one can appeal if things go wrong.
Old paradigm relationships are “intended to maximise security, stability, predictability
and control”. In contrast, “choosing the new paradigm means giving up attachment to
having your relationship adhere to a particular picture of ‘how it’s supposed to be’”
(1997: 30). (Policing the boundaries of the new paradigm can, no doubt, become as
dogmatic as any other political pursuit.) Whether they are described as new paradigm or
polysomething, the relationship and sex models in The Ethical Slut and Polyamory are far
from normative, and the elements of a Foucauldian ethical sensibility are clearly evident
in many polyamorous ‘how-to’ manuals.
What is ethical about polyamory?
91
In The History of Sexuality Volume Two: The Use of Pleasure, Foucault proposes four
elements which make up an ethical sensibility.27 The elements may be considered
independently of one another, yet in many cases two or more elements will be present,
and link into one another. The first element is the determination of ethical substance, or
the will to truth, which poses the questions, “How does one conduct oneself as an ethical
subject?” and “Which part of the self is ‘the material to be worked on’?” (1991: 26). For
example, if a moral code prescribes marital fidelity, is the moral task simply to abstain
from sex with other partners, or to enjoy sex with the conjugal partner? Is one required to
feel and exercise desire exclusively with that partner (forbidding not only sex with other
partners but solo sex such as fantasy/masturbation)? Is it acceptable to feel desire for
others, as long as the desire is never acted upon? Is the exercise of self-control itself the
marker of good ethical conduct?
Within the poly movement, the part of the self that is to be worked on varies widely.
Some seek “monogamous marriage with a wall bumped out to embrace just one more
person” (Nearing 1995: 32), while others seek multi-partner polyfidelity, with the
intention of forming ‘intentional families’ or ‘tribes’ with whom they share communal
resources and childcare. Some polys consider themselves to be single, aiming to engage
in multiple parallel relationships. Some straight polys pursue relationships previously
restricted to gay and lesbian or queer culture – that is, long-term, non-romantic,
sexualised friendships. Some combine a live-in partnership with outside lovers, and some
live up to every negative stereotype of the non-monogamous drama queen. As US writer
27 Foucault himself relates the discussion to morality in The Use of Pleasure, however his explanation of the elements in the interview 'On the Genealogy of Ethics...' (1997) makes it clear that he is referring to an ethical sensibility (in Connolly's sense) rather than morality as it has been defined here.
92
Eric Francis puts it, “polyamorous relationships often have the same confusions and toxic
issues as monogamous relationships, just spread out among more people” (2001,
OrganicLove.html).
Generally speaking, however, the determination of polyamorous ethical substance is
based in the desire to deal honestly with one’s desire for multiple partnerships, whether or
not one chooses to act on the desire. Where heteronormative relationships explicitly or
implicitly demand the denial or disavowal of ‘extramarital’ desire, polyamorous
relationships incorporate such desires within the space of legitimate relations. Crucially,
those who describe themselves as polyamorous often emphasise their openness to loving
more than one partner (whether or not there is sexual contact) and their willingness to
negotiate any emotional obstacles thrown up by that openness. A key factor of poly is the
openness with which relationships are conducted. Rather than ‘having affairs’ or
‘cheating’, polyamorous people engage in multiple relationships with the full knowledge
of all participants. People practising polyamory (or ‘responsible non-monogamy’) do not
pretend to be single, or even monogamously inclined, when they are not. Each new
partner is therefore offered the opportunity to make an informed decision to take or leave
the relationship.
The second element of Foucault’s ethical sensibility is the mode of subjectivation. As he
puts it, the mode of subjectivation describes “the way in which people are invited or
incited to recognize their moral [or ethical] obligations” (1997: 264). The question which
arises here concerns how one recognises oneself in relation to an ethical code; for
example, does adherence to the code offer a secure marker of identity in relation to a
93
group? Is it a sign of spiritual mastery? Is the code practised “in response to an appeal, by
offering oneself as an example” (1990: 27), or in pursuit of an aesthetic ideal or
perfection?
Again, polyamorous practices and responses vary widely. There are those (Deborah
Anapol included) who view poly as a mode of developing an ideal of unconditional love,
and would consider their sexual relationships to be in keeping with their spiritual path
and psychological self-development. Others see poly as part of forming alternative
models of community or family (including models popularised in utopian sci-fi and
fantasy novels such as Starhawk’s The Fifth Sacred Thing or Robert Heinlein’s Stranger
in a Strange Land). Some see poly very much as an identity, similar to hetero, homo or
bisexuality. Regardless of their sexual identity, polys tend to use gay and feminist
terminology to describe their processes of self-recognition – there are many discussions
of the social and political implications of coming out, and many ‘origin’ stories which
reflect Ken Plummer’s observations on sexual storytelling and the formation of sexual
citizenship (1995). For others, the process of becoming poly is part of a rejection of
heteronormativity (Easton and Liszt fall into this category), a commitment to sex-
positivity, and a desire to expand sexual experiences.
Many poly coming-out stories tend to assume a poly identity that was repressed, hidden
or misrecognised before the coming out; for example, there are many who echo the words
of the Loving More personals advertiser ‘Female, 48, bi single’, who proclaims she ‘has
always been poly without knowing a nice word for it’ (Loving More Personals 2000: 36).
For Foucault, however, “being” is “given through problematizations and practices; it is
94
not prior to them” (Rabinow 1997: xxxvi). The third element, then, of the ethical
sensibility is the actual ethical work that one does “not only in order to bring one’s
conduct into compliance with a given rule, but to attempt to transform oneself into the
ethical subject of one’s behaviour” (Foucault 1991: 27). Large parts of both Polyamory
and The Ethical Slut are given to the discussion of the ethical work of poly relationships,
which may range from sexual etiquette in multi-partner or group sex situations and
guidelines for discussion and negotiation with one’s partners, children, family members
and workmates to the language employed when thinking about or describing one’s
actions.
Polyamory demands constant ethical work. A poly couple may be completely
monogamous (at one stage in their relationship), or perhaps open in principle but
monogamous in practice. At another time they may renegotiate the relationship so that
one or both of them have other lovers. This agreement too may be renegotiated. There
may be a phase where one partner has several ‘outside’ lovers, but the other does not.
They may formulate a ‘right of veto’ agreement where one partner has the right to request
that a specific outside relationship does not become physical, or that physical contact
does not progress beyond a certain stage (e.g. no penetrative sex, no overnight visits, or
simply ‘not in our bed!’). With this level of potential emotional and sexual complexity
(the traditional titles ‘husband’ and ‘wife’ are not very helpful here) many polys
(particularly those who communicate online) have developed their own subcultural
descriptive vocabularies. For example, a ‘committed’ couple who share a home, child-
rearing, household expenses and so on may refer to themselves as ‘primary’ partners.
Their other lovers may be referred to as ‘secondaries’. Three-way relationships or
95
ménages à trois can be defined variously as ‘triads’ (all partners are sexual with one
another) or ‘vees’ (one partner is sexual with two others, but those two are not sexual
with one another). These triangle relationships are not exclusively heterosexual; in many
cases they allow bisexuals to relate sexually and emotionally to both men and women. As
a writer in Loving More explains it:
Even on the poly frontier, you need some kind of a map. One couple
operates with a three-page typewritten contract ... This contract stipulates
such items as: initial interviews and probation periods for prospective
secondary and tertiary partners; how secondary and tertiary partners
should be expected to behave around the couple’s daughter; the issuance
of ‘hunting licenses’, for occasions when one person is going away for the
weekend and wants to keep open the possibility of a fling. Such licenses
are a privilege, not a right; they can be withheld if the other partner does
not feel comfortable with the idea; and if the fling develops into a longer
term relationship, the whole thing goes back to square one, with initial
interviews and probation (Cobb 2001: 17).
Polys also use specific jargon or shorthand to redefine emotional interactions. The
‘limerence’ or ‘infatuation’ stage of love (with its accompanying rush of blood to the
head – and other places) is referred to as ‘new relationship energy’ or NRE. NRE is
widely discussed among polys, most commonly as an exciting but fleeting stage during
which no major decisions should take place. In contrast, compulsory heterosexuality has
depended heavily on this ‘true romance’ stage where both parties are ‘swept away’ into
96
the serious business of marriage. While polyamorists certainly do not reject the pleasure
offered by this experience, poly discussion boards and how-to manuals advise a great
deal of caution and self-reflection during this period, particularly in regard to pre-existing
relationships.
NRE is not the only stage subject to intense ethical examination. While standard wisdom
tells us that sexual jealousy is ‘proof of love’ (or simply something horrific to be avoided
at all costs), polyamorous approaches to jealousy are complex and varied. Jealousy may
be seen as a potential ‘teacher’ or indicator of ‘issues’ or ‘needs’ to be met. Jealousy is
not considered to be an inevitable consequence of non-monogamy; in fact many polys
aim for a state of ‘compersion’ (another poly jargon term, coined by an ‘alternative
community’ in the free love era). Compersion is not simply an absence of jealousy, it is a
positive emotion which is the opposite of jealousy. As Anapol (1993: 64) describes it,
compersion is ‘delight in a beloved’s love for another. Compersion tends to be especially
strong when we find that two people we love feel affection for each other.’
Above all, the advice offered regarding poly ethical work reflects that offered by the
Greek philosophers. Anapol and Easton and Liszt incite the would-be polyamorist to
follow the command of the Delphic Oracle and ‘know yourself’ (Easton & Liszt 1997:
64; Anapol 1993: 32). As Easton and Liszt describe it:
…to truly know yourself is a constant journey of self exploration, to learn
about yourself from reading, therapy, and most of all, talking incessantly
with those who are on similar paths. This is hard work, but well worth it
because this is the way you become free to choose how you want to live
97
and love, own your life, and become truly the author of your experience
(1997: 65).
Despite the therapeutic language employed by Easton and Liszt, it is clear that the aim of
knowing oneself through polyamorous work is not to simply develop a perfected
individual identity. Polyamorists necessarily knows themselves in relationship with
others – lovers, families, communities. One purpose to becoming a ‘radical slut’ is
certainly to expand sexual pleasures and contacts. But this is not seen as being separate
from the aim of ‘uprooting’ sexism and sex negativism (Easton & Liszt 1997: 65). As
Foucault puts it, “ethos ... implies a relationship with others, insofar as the care of the self
enables one to occupy his rightful position in the city, in the community, or interpersonal
relationships” (1997: 287). Interestingly, Foucault observes that, for the Greeks, ethical
work also necessarily included what we might currently term ‘self-help’, involving
consultation with experts, and support networks, requiring:
…conversation with, and response to, the lessons of a 'master'... a guide, a
friend, someone who will be truthful with you ... Thus the problem of
relationship with others is present throughout the development of the care
of the self (1997: 287).
Through this process of conversation and reflection, each action, thought and sexual
encounter can be understood in terms of the fourth element of the Foucauldian ethical
sensibility: the telos. Through a telos of ethical (or responsible) non-monogamy,
individual and seemingly unrelated acts are contextualised as part of an overall pattern.
98
Within this framework, the would-be ethical slut considers how each act, conversation or
gesture might advance “a mode of being characteristic of the ethical subject” (1991: 28).
In this chapter, I have offered a model for ethical heterosex within what might be
considered ‘privatised’ (although non-monogamous) relationships. But what of public
manifestations of sexuality? If the influence of feminism and gay and lesbian political
movements is easy to observe within ‘alternative’ heterosexual relationship styles, what
of popular, public and ‘commodified’ forms of sex. In the next chapters I will explore
some recent moral critiques of popular sexuality, and consider how these, too, might be
reframed in ethical terms.
99
Chapter 3
Sex in public: Raunch culture and feminist porn
In this chapter, and those that follow, I will explore the changing aesthetics of
‘mainstream’ porn production and consumption. In addition , I will explore the ways that
both feminist critiques of heterosexism and queer communities’ deployment of explicit
sexual language and images in media designed to promote sexual health and ‘community
pride’ have impacted on mainstream heterosexual media in interesting and at times
surprising ways. While some (notably US journalist Ariel Levy) have claimed that the
public acceptance of sexually explicit media and ‘raunchy’ female behaviour represents a
weakening of feminism, there is a strong history within feminism which has both
supported and encouraged these kinds of representations and behaviours. In fact, ‘blatant’
sexual imagery has been used within both queer and feminist activism as a means of
building erotic and political communities, and as a form of political protest. This is not
surprising, considering that one of the primary motives within heteronormativity is to
police sexualities and sexual identities in such a way that only some may speak
‘legitimately’ about sex and pleasure.
Before I examine the links between early second-wave feminist thinking on sexuality and
contemporary popular culture, however, I will digress slightly to explore the challenge
that these explicit representations of sexual practices and ‘sex education’ offer to
normative models of sexuality, particularly female sexuality. The nervous and troubled
response to ‘raunch culture’ or proliferating is, to a degree, a response to the
100
popularisation of commercialised or ‘commodified’ sexualities. But it is also, I would
argue, the product of considerable anxiety over forms of sexuality that challenge norms
established in the late nineteenth and early twentieth century, via what Foucault has
termed the “deployment of sexuality”.
The problem with public sex
Given that public language for explicitly discussing sexuality has been traditionally
restricted to the heteronormative male-dominated realms of medicine (or science) on the
one hand and pornography on the other, it is not surprising that feminists and queer
theorists have sought to adapt both to their own ends. Given the adaptability of
capitalism, it is also not surprising that ‘fringe’ expressions of sexuality have been folded
into commercial marketing discourses. The criticism of porn and other forms of public
sex culture often focuses on the profits made by pornographers (although, as I will
discuss in Chapter 4, not all porn is commercially produced, or designed, for the purposes
of profit).
However, many of the arguments against public sex culture seem to be as troubled by its
seemingly unfettered ‘publicness’ of sexual discourse as they are by their
commercialisation. Why should this be the case? In his essay “Public and Private”,
Michael Warner (2002) links queer and feminist theorising of bodies and sexuality to the
way boundaries are constructed to define public and private spaces. Warner is not the
first to observe that the liberal ideal of ‘sex as private’ relies on very unstable definitions
of public and private, since “[a] private conversation can take place in a public forum; a
101
kitchen can become a public gathering place; a private bedroom can be a public and
commercial space, as in a hotel; a radio can bring a public discussion into a bathroom,
and so on” (2002: 27). In fact, public and private realms blend and overlap in various
complex ways. The ‘couple’ (and ideally the ‘family’) is often offered as the ultimate site
of privacy. Yet it is strictly regulated, and subject to public scrutiny at all levels, from
public health campaigns to governmental legislation to reality television programming
and talk-show commentary.
Since the 1970s, feminists have argued that the liberal insistence on ‘non-interference’ in
the private sphere means that many forms of real violence and domination, such as
domestic violence and child sexual assault, were regarded as ‘family matters’. And, as
Warner argues, concepts of the public and the private are intrinsically interwoven with
embodiment and gender. Drawing on Bourdieu’s notion of habitus, Warner observes that
everyday habits of embodiment, from hygiene and grooming practices to clothing and
deportment, manners and conduct, all rely on understandings of boundaries between the
public and the private, to the extent that “some bodily sensations – of pleasure and pain,
shame and display, appetite and purgation – come to be felt … as privacy” (2002: 23).
It is this conflation of embodiment with privacy that has been challenged by queer
activists seeking to resist what they consider to be the ‘compulsory heterosexuality’ of
the public sphere. A fundamental cliché of liberal sexual tolerance is ‘I don’t care what
people do ... in the privacy of their own homes’. A parallel principle to this sentiment
dictates, therefore, that the state should ‘stay out of the bedroom’, that is, that legislators
should not be concerned with the sexual practices of citizens, as sex somehow occurs
102
‘outside’ of the social. However, this facade of tolerance can only exist if standards of
heteronormativity are accepted as ‘the’ standards of sexual and domestic behaviour. The
‘privileges’ of heteronormativity are not a given; they are contracted in exchange for the
normative heterosexual’s implicit agreement to maintain a position of centrality in
relation to marginalised sexual ‘others’. As part of this agreement, it is understood that,
while heterosexuals may display physical affection publicly, they will not ‘flaunt’ the
details of their sexual pleasures and practices. The bedroom is the discreet zone of
heterosexuality; indeed it is the ‘right and proper’ place for sex to take place (as opposed,
for example, to public toilets, parks and saunas).
As David Bell observes, the ‘privacy’ of the bedroom is only available to those whose
sexuality is not subject to legislative surveillance, since queer ‘citizens’ may be punished
both for ‘public’ sexual acts and for those that occur ‘in private’. The tenuousness of
queer sexual privacy is nowhere more evident than in the 1998 Operation Spanner case,
in which home videos and bondage equipment were seized by police as evidence of
‘criminal’ sexual activities – yet these acts had been consensually negotiated by all the
(gay male) participants. As Bell argues, the Spanner case implies a legalistic construction
of all ‘bad’ sex as potentially ‘public’, particularly if the sex is documented in any way,
or if erotic props and costumes are involved. According to Bell:
... the law’s eruptions into the private begin a process of reducing or even
erasing the private as a site of pleasure, rendering pleasure a public – and by
that a political – issue (thus transforming intimacy by removing it from an
entirely private sphere). For sexual dissidents, there is an obvious tension
103
between the desire for privacy and the need to be public, while state and law
must draw things into the public only to thrust them back into the same
(reduced) private space (1995: 313).
It is clear, then, that, while the bedroom is considered to be a ‘private’ sexual space, it is
subject to certain kinds of surveillance. Since ‘compulsory heterosexuality’ prescribes
certain kinds of sex while proscribing others, even the most normal heterosexual requires
‘outside’ help in assessing their behaviour. It is not surprising, then, that the ‘private’
realm of the bedroom is normalised in public discussions which emphasise the ‘personal’
nature of sexual activity, even as they standardise and classify it according to
‘impersonal’ norms. As Bell, Rubin (1992) and others have observed, the position of the
‘good’ heterosexual is extremely tenuous in this context, particularly that of the ‘good’
heterosexual woman. The introduction of any elements of ‘dissident’ sexuality into the
idealised hetero dyad must be done carefully, and framed by tropes of domesticity, love,
intimacy and commitment. Otherwise heteronormativity is threatened.
As Jane Juffer observes in her study of women’s ‘everyday’ use of pornography, expert
discourses which offer advice regarding heterosex and relationships, “from John Gray to
... erotic education videos”, have a tendency to discuss the home and, more importantly
the bedroom at the valorised centre of heterosexual practice (1998: 170-71). Like the
early sexologist who apologised for the ‘necessarily distasteful’ aspect of their
investigations, Juffer notes that by:
104
…merely by invoking the bedroom, the videos, books, and many articles on
sex in women’s magazines acquire a certain sanitised voyeurism that both
links to discussions of privacy and divulges the secrets of [this] most ‘private’
space (1998: 170).
The tone of much ‘sanitised’ voyeurism assumes that heterosexuality is indeed ‘private’,
and only to be examined in the interests of its own health and reconstitution – and then
only briefly. Yet, historically, the ‘threat’ of perverse sexuality has not been imposed
from outside, but has actually emerged from within the privatised domestic space itself.
The deployment of (hetero)sexuality
In History of Sexuality Volume One, Foucault tracks what he terms ‘the deployment of
sexuality’, which occurred as mechanisms of power and surveillance shifted from church
to state in the eighteenth century. Prior to this time, he argues, both Christian and civil
law focused on defining and scrutinising ‘matrimonial relations’. As he puts it, “the sex
of husband and wife was beset by rules and recommendations”:
…the marital obligation, the ability to fulfil it, the manner in which one
complied with it, the requirements and violences which accompanied it, the
useless or unwanted caresses for which it was a pretext, its fecundity or the
way one went about making it sterile, the moments when one demanded it ...
its frequency or infrequency, and so on (1990:37).
105
Marital sex was the biggest ‘problem’ of governance, and was consequently the subject
of the most intense civil and religious policing: “if [married heterosex] was found to be
lacking, it had to come forward and plead its case before a witness” (1991: 37). In
contrast, the rules governing sexual behaviours which took place outside of marriage
were confused and vague – the practice of sodomy was forbidden to married and
unmarried people, but it was grouped in with disparate sexual practices that were not
clearly defined, other than their being ‘debauchery’ or acts ‘against nature’ (1990: 37).
As Foucault puts it, “to marry a close relative or practice sodomy, to seduce a nun or
practice sadism” was considered roughly equivalent. There were legitimate sexual acts,
and there were acts ‘against the law’ – one’s sexual practices did not, as yet, determine
one’s different, or individual identity or subjectivity (1991: 39).
However, as discourses of medicine, psychiatry and social science developed new means
of mapping and classifying ‘populations’, the focus of sexual regulation shifted. There
was, in Foucault’s evocative words, “a centrifugal movement with respect to heterosexual
monogamy”, in which the massive array of prescriptions and proscriptions governing
marital behaviour were compressed and compacted (1990: 38). Male/female reproductive
sex was still regarded as both ‘natural’ and desirable, and thus:
…the array of pleasures and practices continued to be referred to it as an internal
standard; but it was spoken of less and less, or in any case in growing moderation.
Efforts to find out its secrets were abandoned; nothing further was demanded of it
than to define itself from day to day. The legitimate couple, with its regular
106
sexuality, had a right to more discretion. It tended to function as a norm, one that
was stricter, perhaps, but quieter. On the other hand, what came under scrutiny
was the sexuality of children, mad men and women, and criminals; the sensuality
of those who did not like the opposite sex (1990: 38).
From this point on, marital heterosex was assumed to be ‘normal’ unless proven
otherwise. It no longer had to account for itself in the same way as before, since
‘sexuality’ was now an intense problem of those outside of heteronormativity, as “the
natural laws of matrimony and the immanent rules of sexuality began to be recorded on
two separate registers” (Foucault 1990: 40). It was not marital sex, but sexual deviance
which had to make an account of itself in order to be mapped and classified – “if regular
sexuality happened to be questioned once again, it was through a reflux movement,
originating in these peripheral sexualities” (1990: 38).
Heterosex had become a ‘private’ matter which took place in the marital bedroom, and
was thus not a matter of public discussion – in theory at least. However, while the
deployment of sexuality intensified the focus on ‘other’ sexualities, it did so as part of a
grid of power relations in which ‘private’ heteronormative domestic space was absolutely
enmeshed. The new incitements to discourse which constituted the deployment of
sexuality did not replace but instead were interwoven with pre-existing concerns about
the reproductive couple and the ‘family unit’. Hetero sexuality might not have been as
central a concern, but families, children, parenting, and household economy certainly
was. There was an overlapping of what Foucault terms the “deployment of alliance”,
107
which was largely concerned with the “fixation and development of kinship ties, of
transmission of names and possessions” (1990: 106) which had been “built around a
system of rules defining the permitted and the forbidden, the licit and the illicit” (1990:
106) and the more subtle deployment of sexuality which “operates according to mobile,
polymorphous, and contingent techniques of power” (1990: 106).
In fact, the four elements that Foucault identified in the deployment of sexuality can be
seen as defined in direct relation to ‘normal’ heterosexuality. “The hysterical woman, the
masturbating child, the Malthusian couple and the ‘perverse adult’” were the “targets and
anchor points” for the new incitements and classification of sexual knowledges precisely
because of their dangerous closeness to the privileged centre of ‘regular’ sexuality – the
family home (1990: 105).
The hysteric was defined by her reproductive function, “thoroughly saturated with
sexuality”, and pathologised as a result. Yet her ‘natural’ role was to be “placed in
organic communication with the social body ... the family space ... and the life of
children” (Foucault 1990: 104). Children’s sexuality was both ‘natural’ and ‘contrary to
nature’. Since children were ‘untainted’ by adult sexuality yet also dangerously prone to
corruption and perversity, parents and other caretakers were encouraged to monitor both
individual children and institutional or communal spaces (such as schools or shared
bedrooms) (1990: 104). Married couples were ‘responsible’ to the social body, which
then, as now, either “had to be limited or on the contrary reinvigorated”, depending on
108
the prevailing current of cultural anxieties (1990: 105).28 Children’s ‘private’ sexual
functioning was a matter of public interest, not only in the name of ‘nature’ but in the
name of a greater social good: public health, hygiene and population control. Finally, the
perverse adult was the clearest site of a new delineation between normal biological
‘instinct’ and desires for deviant pleasures which emerged from the psyche. As “the
young homosexual who rejects marriage or neglects his wife” or perhaps “the impotent,
sadistic, perverse husband” (1990: 111), he posed a clear threat to the heteronormative
family unit. He was therefore the legitimate subject of the medical or psychiatric “process
of normalisation or pathologisation, development of ‘corrective technology’” (1990:
104).
While the heterosexual couple ostensibly had a right to sexual discretion, in practice “the
family, parents and relatives became the chief agents of a deployment of sexuality which
drew its outside support from doctors, educators, and later psychiatrists” (Foucault 1990:
110). Given, however, that ‘regular’ heterosex still functioned as the norm, there was
(and still is) a widespread insistence that sexuality was a problem that emanated from
‘others’, who threatened the family from the outside by negatively influencing or
corrupting husbands, wives and children. That is not to say that there was no
acknowledgement of a domestic sexuality. The major conflict for the Malthusian couple
was reconciling the economies of social (reproductive) responsibility with the various
28 I cannot help but compare Foucault's descriptions of the anxieties that surrounded and constituted the 'Malthusian couple' with contemporary pronouncements by Australian politicians and public policy analysts regarding declining birthrates and the changing make-up of the population. The social 'problems' of 2002 – from aging baby-boomers, to 'illegal' immigrants, working mothers, and single women and lesbians seeking IVF – can all be seen to reflect back on this eighteenth century construction of the ideal productive heterosexual couple...who are fit to contribute their sexual and social energies to the 'right' kind of population.
109
‘economies of pleasure’ which might have no bearing on reproduction at all (1990: 154).
So, while marital sex was a private matter, it is not surprising that ‘responsible’ couples
sent up “a plea for help in reconciling these unfortunate conflicts between sexuality and
alliance [in which] the family broadcast the long complaint of its sexual suffering to
doctors, educators, psychiatrists, priests and pastors, to all the “experts” who would
listen” (1990: 111).
It is easy to see the contemporary heterosexual couple in these descriptions. Heterosexual
relations are ‘normal’, yet they are constantly threatened with encroaching sexual
‘abnormalities’ which, paradoxically, are seen to be both threats from outsiders and
insidious (or in Freudian terms unconscious) threats from within. Heterosexuality was
normalised via regulation, precisely because heterosexual claims to normativity were so
tenuous. Even the most virtuous woman might fall prey to hysteria, even the most
innocent child was corruptible, and even the most demonstrative husband might carry
within him the seed of perversity. With this tension, the role of the heterosexual woman
is particularly important. As Foucault puts it:
…in the process of the hystericisation of women, ‘sex’ was defined in three
ways: as that which belongs in common to men and women; as that which
belongs par excellence to men and hence is lacking in women; but at the same
time, as that which by itself constitutes a woman’s body, ordering it wholly
(1990: 154).
The heterosexual woman was defined as normal by virtue of her potential for
110
reproductive function, rather than her desire for sexual pleasure – but, as Stephen Heath
observes, the definition of ‘woman as hysteric’ forms the nucleus of psychoanalytic
theories of sexual identity (1982: 43-49). Hysteria can be read as the 'problem' of
femininity, however feminist theorists such as Elizabeth Grosz present excellent
arguments that hysteria may serve as “resistance to the demands and requirements of
heterosexual monogamy and the social and sexual role culturally assigned to women”
(1995: 158), it can also be read as a 'normal' feminine response, in a way that female
heterosexual desire cannot. I argue that a hysteric's 'control' of her cultural situation is
'quieter', more 'feminine', and much less politically and socially volatile than the 'control'
exerted by a desiring woman. Within normalised institutional heterosexuality, a woman’s
desire to perform her ‘healthy’ reproductive function is both incited and pathologised. In
contemporary terms, I would argue that heterosexual women’s sexuality is still a
‘problem’ unless it is channelled, if not into family life, then at least into the ‘committed
relationship’. Pleasure for the sake of pleasure (including erotic display, fantasy and
masturbation) are only deemed healthy within proscribed limits. As Louise Kaplan points
out, even the most ‘perverse’ (non-reproductive) sexuality can be seen to support a
normalised, masculine desire for erection and orgasm (see Kaplan 1999). Certain ‘bad’
sexual activities such as the use of pornography, fetish objects and sex toys have been
considered within various normalising frameworks, from feminism to psychoanalysis, to
be inherently masculine, and therefore may be ‘naturally’ practised by heterosexual men
but not heterosexual women (see Rubin 1992). The ‘normal’ heterosexual man may
indulge in ‘bad practice’ and still remain indisputably heterosexual, and a male. When
women pursue similar forms of sexual expression, they are deemed to be either ‘male-
111
identified’ or simply duped.
In this historical context, it is not surprising that heterosexual women’s public expression
of sexual desire or even sexual knowingness provokes considerable unease. Although the
contemporary version of Foucault’s Malthusian couple can be seen as individualised
agents in a ‘pure relationship’, that relationship is at once privatised and subject to
external temptations, pressures and expert scrutiny. As feminist historians such as
Gordon (1983) and Matthews (1985) have observed, both sex workers and other sexually
active ‘fallen’ women have traditionally been viewed as a threat to the family. That is,
sex workers have been represented as vectors for venereal diseases, which men then
transmit to their wives and perhaps their children. In contemporary feminist terms, sex
workers have been perceived as a different kind of threat, in that their participation (and
apparent pleasure in) ‘bad’ or ‘male-identified’ forms of sexualised dress, grooming and
behaviour are seen as encouragement for men to demand similar forms of sexual
performance or self-representation from their romantic or domestic partners (i.e. the
‘good’ women).
In 2005, New Yorker journalist Ariel Levy received considerable attention for her book
Female Chauvinist Pigs: Women and the Rise of Raunch Culture. In it, Levy describes
what she terms ‘the female chauvinist pig’, who is, according to the back cover blurb,
“the new ‘empowered woman’ who wears the Playboy bunny as a talisman, pursues
casual sex as if it were a sport, and takes off her bra to win favour from the boys”.
Although Levy was presented in many of her Australian interviews (notably the Seven
Network’s Sunrise) as something of a prude, her actual arguments are not anti-sex per se.
112
What Levy opposes is what she calls ‘raunch culture’ (which others have called ‘porno-
chic’) on the grounds that it represents a new form of compulsory heterosexual
expression which demands that women adopt particular forms of sexual expression and
sexual identity which have traditionally been seen as marginal and male-oriented. That is,
she argues, the bulk of popular culture (in the US at least) demands that women perform
their sexuality in ways that are not just male-identified (in classic feminist terms) but
defined by models of heterosexuality as defined by the commercial sex industry.
Unlike some commentators, I am unwilling to dismiss Levy’s entire argument. While I
disagree with Levy’s assertion that raunch culture has become the dominant mode of
acceptable femininity in the West, like Levy I am perplexed by the tendency in US
popular culture to represent sex workers and sex industry aesthetics as aspirational
symbols of sexy rebelliousness in a period in which abstinence education and virginity
pledges are being promoted by the US government as valid alternatives to safe sex.
My views on feminism and the aesthetics of the sex industry are somewhat different to
Levy’s, however. While Levy acknowledges that feminists have actively participated in
the sex industry as not only performers but also producers, her main concern seems to be
that sexual exhibitionism and participation in public sex culture is an ‘inauthentic’ form
of sexual expression for women that results, by and large, from an overexposure to the
male-dominated media’s co-opting of feminist arguments. Her opening case study, the
reality soft-porn series Girls Gone Wild, certainly seems an example of unethical media
production. The series producers travel to resort bars and beaches, inviting young women
113
to flash and/or simulate solo or group sex for their cameras. The participants are unpaid,
but are rewarded with branded clothing, and, as Levy observes, while some participants
seem to be subject to ‘peer pressure’ there is no shortage of young women volunteers.
Certainly, in Levy’s description, the Girls Gone Wild producers come across as
exploiters. One tells Levy that the aim is to attract not ‘girls-next-door’ but ‘tens’, who
are described as “100-110 pounds, big boobs, blonde, blue eyes, ideally no piercing or
tattoos” (Levy 2005: 12). Although the series is primarily marketed to heterosexual men,
only women appear onscreen, and same-sex kissing and fondling is encouraged.
It would be easy to dismiss Levy on the basis of class bias. Throughout Female
Chauvinist Pigs she disparagingly describes the middle-class women who participate in
raunch culture in derogatory terms: they are ‘skanky’, ‘kitschy’, ‘slutty’, ‘tacky’,
‘tawdry’ and ‘bawdy’.29 As Laura Kipnis (1992) has argued in her study of Hustler
magazine, porn has not traditionally been designed to appeal to middle-class, university
educated women. On the contrary, pornographers from the Marquis de Sade onwards
have explicitly opposed bourgeois notions of ‘good taste’. The visual language of raunch
culture is, by definition, the ‘downwardly mobile’, white-trash aesthetic of ‘bad’
femininity: visible g-strings, big bleached hair, fake tans, obvious fake nails and breast
implants, midriff tops, mini-skirts, tight hipsters, platform shoes and belly-piercings.30
Levy is right when she observes that the popularisation of these fashions among middle-
29 Levy makes it clear that she doesn’t support the ironic use of these terms, and is not deploying them in a camp or ironic sense. 30 For a (rare) detailed academic feminist exploration of the intersections of gender, race and class within porn narratives and aesthetics.see Constance Penley ‘Crackers and whackers: the white trashing of porn’ in Williams (ed) 2004.
114
class women is a recent phenomenon – until the 1990s this ‘more is more’ sexual
aesthetic was exclusively limited to professional sex workers and working-class ‘sluts’.
While Levy claims that Girls Gone Wild “is not extraordinary, it’s emblematic” (2005:
17), I would argue that the popularisation of the sex industry aesthetic is not as
homogenising or bleakly heteronormalising as Female Chauvinist Pigs suggests. Her
case studies are worth unpacking, since they represent broader contemporary concerns
around public and mediated representations of sexuality. These concerns are not
‘censorious’, and are grounded in popular feminist and Marxist critiques of media culture
and sexuality, particularly in regard to ‘public sex’. They are interesting examples of
what I see as a tendency to encapsulate or cocoon normative assumptions of ideal
gendered sexual conduct within discussions of ‘corrupt’ media or cultural practice.31
Certainly, the increased availability of porn online has resulted in a destigmatisation and
demystification of porn in popular culture. Pornography is no longer ‘marginal’ – it is
recognised not only as a major industry in most western cultures (and a major US export)
but also as a major aesthetic influence on popular culture. I would argue, however, that
the increased acceptability of sexual media is not simply a sign of patriarchal capitalism’s
triumph over feminism, or, as it’s often explained, a simple proof that ‘sex sells’.32
31 Naomi Wolf’s 1997 Promiscuities is a notable example of this tendency, but it occurs frequently within general non-academic feminist inflected commentary on mediated sexuality. It also appears in conservative or right-wing discourses around sexuality. 32 As Linda Williams (2004) observes, even the most ‘mainstream’ pornography has responded to its critics in significant ways. Rape and coercive ‘seduction’ is no longer a feature of mainstream pornography, nor are the ‘violent’ aspects of Hollywood cinema, such as gunfights or fistfights. The ‘extreme’ porn genre represented by filmmakers like Max Hardcore and Rob Black, which feature activities such as spitting, name-calling and ‘swirlies’ (flushing a sex partners head in the toilet during sex) is considered ‘fringe’ in the US, and such videos are not permitted for sale in Australia under the X classification at all.
115
Along with media theorists and sociologists such as Ken Plummer (1995), Catharine
Lumby (1997, 1999) and Brian McNair (2002), I argue that what Levy describes as
raunch culture is one aspect of a changing popular discourse of sexuality and gender that
is manifested in diverse forms, including (but not limited to) changes in the reporting of
sex scandals, talk-show confessions, changes in fashion and grooming, and the
availability of DIY media technologies such as digital cameras and blogging software. In
fact, I agree with McNair that these changes are evidence of a ‘democratisation of desire’
(2002). Within this culture, public performances of ‘sexiness’ are indeed commodified.
While this can involve the reinscription of dominant heteronormative modes of gendered
sexual expression, it can, as I will argue, be seen as a reworking of discursive
understandings of what it means to perform gender and sexuality. It can also allow
potentially challenging queer or feminist refigurings of sexual pleasure and gendered
behaviour to circulate in ways that can coexist with or even replace hegemonic
heterosexualities.
By claiming that the mainstreaming of raunch culture is a product of queer and feminist
politics, I am not arguing, as Levy puts it, that “the feminist project [has] already been
achieved” (2005: 3), and that misogyny is no longer a relevant force in women’s
everyday lives. Instead, I am arguing that raunch culture represents something more
complex than women deciding that they are, as Levy puts it, “empowered enough to get
Brazilian waxes … and join the frat party of pop culture” (2005: 4). The changing
popular discourses of sexuality reflect changing modes of femininity and masculinity,
and involve changes in the way men, as well as women, are representing themselves
116
within these discourses. In addition, these discourses reflect the way that popular cultural
producers, including those in the sex industry, have responded to feminism and queer
politics.
Who said porn was feminist?
While Levy cites interviews with Erica Jong and Susan Brownmiller to support her thesis
that feminism and commercial porn aesthetics are (or ought to be) dichotomous, the
history of feminist involvement with, and attitudes towards, public commercial sexual
expression is more complex than these interviews suggest. While it is true that many
second-wave feminists opposed the sex industry, and regarded female sex workers with
pity or scorn, others did not draw such clear distinctions. As diverse feminists such as
Amber Hollibaugh (1992) and Pat Califia (1992) have observed, many feminist activists
were themselves sex workers in one capacity or another (albeit often closeted). Some
theorised feminist opposition to sex work as an expression of class privilege that could
only be exercised by those who were in a position (by virtue of family background or
educational opportunity) to be able to afford to fund their everyday expenses (including
volunteer or activist work) with the income from well-paying jobs or inheritances.
Others, such as Susie Bright, took up the critiques of radical feminists such as Andrea
Dworkin and interpreted them as a challenge to create new representations and stories of
female (and feminist) sexuality. If pornography (and indeed any public discourse of sex)
was seen as a site of male privilege, these women reasoned, then it was time for women
to claim these privileges for themselves. As Bright put it:
117
Here’s the irony ... every single woman who pioneered the sexual
revolution, every erotic-feminist-bad-girl-and-proud-of-it-stiletto-shitkicker,
was once a fan of Andrea Dworkin. Until 1984, we all were. She was the
one who got us looking at porn with a critical eye, she made you feel like
you could just stomp into the adult bookstore and seize everything for
inspection and a bonfire …We saw the sexism of the porn business ... but
we also saw some intriguing possibilities and amazing maverick spirit. We
said, ‘What if we made something that reflected our politics and values, but
was just as sexually bold?’ (Bright 2005a).
The ‘politics and values’ Bright refers to were those of the women’s health and self-help
movements, in which women sought to create discourses of female health and sexuality
that were not based on male-dominated models (Loe 1999). As pornstar-turned-feminist
porn-producer Candida Royalle put it:
We were reclaiming who we were as women, our true essence, what we
deserved as human beings. We were shedding our political preconceptions.
These efforts [running a women’s café and free clinic] highlighted a
wonderful sisterhood, and the right to sexual pleasure (Royalle in Nagle
1997: 157).33
The early 1970s saw a proliferation of popular feminist non-fiction texts which
aimed to ‘demystify’ female sexuality and promote female autonomy in
33 Royalle was part of the feminist pornstar support group ‘Club 90’, which also included well known performers and activists Annie Sprinkle and Veronica Vera.
118
reproductive and sexual health, including autonomy in sexual pleasure. These
texts, which included the Boston Women’s Health Collective’s Our Bodies, Our
Selves (1974), Lonnie Barbach’s For Yourself (1975), Nancy Friday’s My Secret
Garden (1974) and Shere Hite’s The Hite Report (1976), drew on Masters and
Johnson’s sex research to promote masturbation and sexual fantasy as a prime
source of women’s sexual independence.34 Betty Dodson’s Liberating
Masturbation (1974) (still in print as Sex for One) promoted masturbation as an
antidote to heteronormative romantic ideologies and personal neuroses. Dodson
was influential in promoting vibrators as reliable devices for self-pleasuring, and
while these were available in some department stores, in the main they were sold
in male-oriented sex shops. Consequently, when feminist health worker Joani
Blank opened the first ‘feminist sex shop’, Good Vibrations, as a mail-order
company in 1977, vibrators and erotic fiction formed a major part of her stock.
As Meiya Loe explains in her study of the history of Good Vibrations as a form of
‘feminist capitalism’, the ‘ideology of sexual empowerment’ was an implicit aspect of the
Good Vibrations branding and marketing strategy. While Blank, who no longer runs the
business, was heterosexual, and reflected a fairly conservative feminist approach to
sexual expression, later staff members such as Susie Bright, Shar Rednour, Jackie Strano
and Carol Queen (still ‘resident sexologist’) brought a queerer sensibility to the store and
its products. As Bright put it in a 1992 interview:
34 This movement within feminism was not universal, however, even among feminists who were ‘pro sex’ in other respects. In her 1983 article ‘Sensual uncertainty, or why the Clitoris is not enough’ Lynne Segal questioned what she saw as an uncritical overreliance on the behaviorist psychology of Masters and Johnson .
119
We had a big controversy with the owner of the store, Joani, who didn’t
want to have dildos in the store because she was so exasperated with
everyone adoring ‘the phallus’; she just wanted to get the phallus out of her
store entirely. And I had to say to her, Look, I’ve got lesbians banging down
my door for dildos. I know that’s not supposed to be what lesbians want, but
that’s just because we’ve accepted this dishonesty that there’s nothing
physically pleasurable about fucking-and there is! ... It’s very stimulating.
People aren’t just doing it because they’ve been brainwashed by the
patriarchy; it feels good! (Juno & Vale 1992: 215)
Although feminists had been producing explicitly feminist erotic writing and imagery
since the 1970s, it was not until 1984 that feminists began to produce and distribute
sexually explicit imagery in the traditionally ‘masculine’ domains of magazine and video
pornography. It could be argued that these productions were a direct response to feminist
challenges to the broader commercial sex industry, and to the ‘lesbian sex wars’ in which
butch/femme and BDSM sexual play were opposed as ‘violence against women’ (for
accounts of these debates from the ‘sex-positive’ perspective, see Vance, 1992, and
Califia in Samois). Lesbian partners Nan Kinney and Debi Sundahl met at a Women
Against Violence Against Women meeting, but believed that feminist targeting of the sex
industry as a prime site of protest against male oppression was based on classed
prejudice. As Sundahl put it, “Why, when abuse happens across class and race lines did
we choose to march in poorer sections where the sex theatres were, and where poorer
women made a living?” (Sundahl in Nagle 1997: 159). The pair used Sundahl’s earnings
120
as a stripper to fund the lesbian sex magazine On Our Backs, whose title was a direct
challenge to the anti-porn tendencies in the feminist magazine off our backs. Their
company, Blush Entertainment, also included Fatale video production and distribution
companies.35 According to Sundahl, she started the company “because both gay and
straight men had tons of sexually explicit material, and lesbians had zero … Fatale
created the genre of authentic lesbian erotic videos, directly challenging the ruling
stereotypes of lesbians created by men for men through their girl-on-girl videos”
(Sundahl in Nagle 1997: 163).
At the same time, Royalle, who had worked as a porn performer from 1975 to 1981, was
rethinking her involvement in the industry. According to Royalle:
I decided there was nothing wrong with the concept of sexual entertainment,
but most of the actual films reflected a sexually shame-based society and its
negative attitude toward women … I decided that the answer was to create
materials that bespoke a more loving and healthy attitude to sex and women.
Were women exploited? Yes, because while we were essential to the
production of porn and in fact what drove the sales of pornography, our
sexual needs were not addressed: we might as well have been blow-up dolls
(Royalle in Nagle 1997: 157).
Royalle’s videos for Femme Productions are widely credited with pioneering the now
mainstream (and commercially successful) genre of ‘couples porn’. Neither Royalle’s
35 For detailed account of the development of North American lesbian and dyke (as opposed to ‘girl-on-girl’) pornographic film and video see Butler 2004.
121
heterosexual videos nor Sundahl’s lesbian films were seen as marketable in the
mainstream porn industry until they had established their own distribution networks
(Nagle 1997).
In offering these examples I am not seeking to advance the claim that female-produced
porn is fundamentally different from (or better than) porn made by men. I am, however,
seeking to counter the implication in Levy’s complaints against raunch culture that
mainstream porn producers have conjured the idea that porn can support feminist
principles out of a simple desire to expand audiences. The assertion that women can
enjoy watching (and making) porn comes from within feminism, and reflects not just a
venal marketing claim but an expression of political activism.
By the late1990s, ‘alternative’ sexual imagery depicting queer and feminist porn was in
fact gaining a mainstream audience, as it was adapted by music icons like Madonna, and
by designers like Vivienne Westwood, Thierry Mugler and John Paul Gaultier, who
appropriated elements of queer/fetishistic sexuality into fashion designs and illustrations.
As McNair observes, “if the anonymous near-naked girls who decorated Duran Duran
videos … were clearly doing it for the boys … Madonna was just as clearly in control of
her own sexualised image” (2002: 67).36
36 McNair makes the interesting point that contrary to the mundane assertion that ‘sex sells’, Madonna’s Sex book and Erotica CD were actually seen as ‘too threatening’ (i.e. too queer) by many markets, and it was not until the release of her 1998 Ray of Light CD that her sales returned to the levels she achieved prior to the Sex/Erotica package.
122
While the above examples have focused on US feminists, the women’s health movement
in Australia from the 1970s onwards, as Kimberley O’Sullivan observes, encouraged
sexual exploration as feminist praxis. As O’Sullivan explains, the Leichhardt Women’s
Health Centre (a feminist inner-city clinic) ran evening courses on women’s bodies and
sexuality which:
consisted of intense discussions of bodies and sexual self-images and
always included a genital self-examination … The Centre also promoted a
leaflet on tips for reducing painful periods, one of which was to have an
orgasm. It cheerfully advised that if you don’t feel like sex with a partner,
use a vibrator, which was strongly recommended for the sexually self-
sufficient woman (1997: 116).
The Australian context for the production and consumption of ‘feminist/women’s porn’
was fairly similar to that of the US, although it took place on a much smaller scale. Debi
Sundahl’s On Our Backs and Fatale videos achieved limited distribution in Australia in
the 1980s, and are credited by O’Sullivan as a catalyst for the formation of various
underground lesbian sex publications and parties in Sydney in the 1990s, notably Wicked
Women magazine (which was launched by Jasper (Francine) Laybutt and Lisa Salmon in
1988) and the Wicked Women parties (O’Sullivan 1997).37 As Kerry Bashford observes,
from the late eighties onward, Sydney hosted a small but thriving sex-radical and
coalitionist culture, which encouraged sexual exhibitionism, ‘fetishistic’ sex and political 37 An anthology of writing from Wicked Women contributors was published as Kink in 1994. A fictional, but highly evocative account of the 1990s sex-positive queer sex party scene occurs in Fiona McGregor’s novel Chemical Palace, published in 2004.
123
affiliation between feminism and gay and lesbian activists (Bashford: 1993). Certainly in
my undergraduate years in the early 1990s, Madonna’s more popular work was seen by
my fellow students as existing in a kind of continuum with the smaller, more
underground Sydney scene.38 The idea that sexually explicit images and texts were being
made by and for women seemed tremendously exciting, even if most of us were less than
enamoured with Candida Royalle’s slightly tame take on ‘couples porn’. At the same
time, the Riot Grrl movement in popular music was adapting the punk DIY ethos for
contemporary feminism. This movement was fairly small, yet it was highly influential in
reshaping the feminist aesthetics of sexuality. Originally it was US based, loosely
comprised of bands and fanzines (or ‘zines’) which deployed the values and rhetoric of
punk in the name of feminism or, as the slogan put it, ‘revolution girl-style now’.
However, with the parallel rise of online networks it quickly became a global movement.
For example, Rosie Cross, the creator of the online zine GeekGrrl, was based in Sydney
but her zine had readers around the world.39
In addition to adopting a DIY attitude towards cultural production and distribution, young
women who organised around, or identified with, the Riot Grrl ethos adapted the punk
subcultural strategies of parody, appropriation and subversive repetition/reinscription of
‘conservative’ iconography to both mock and pay loving tribute to forms of feminine
38 Sydney lesbian photographer C.Moore Hardy, who documented this scene, notes that this period was one sexual celebration, erotic performance and coalition between gay men, lesbians and other queers. She draws parallels to the cabaret scene in 1920s Berlin, and notes that mainstream media texts such as Black & White, Vogue, and Australian Women’s Forum promoted the subcultural aesthetics of latex, leather and fetishware in a somewhat sanitised form. (Hardy 1997) 39 See Bail (ed) 1997)
124
expression that had been rejected by many second-wave feminists.40 As Martina
Ladendorf (2000) has observed, the young feminist producers of the zines like Bust,
Bitch, Disgruntled Housewife and Smile and Act Nice favoured the ironic juxtaposition of
retro cheesecake pin-ups with ‘cute’ graphic images such as ‘Hello Kitty’ to illustrate
their discussions of body image, employment opportunities, bands and other traditionally
feminist topics. The deployment of ‘cute’, pink or feminine images was, Ladendorf
argues, analogous to the use of the term ‘girls’ rather than ‘women’ within Riot Grrl
texts. Tiaras, slip-dresses, high-heels and make-up were adapted by straight and queer
women in a kind of ‘high-femme’ feminism, as described by Bust editor Debbie Stoller:
Unlike our feminist foremothers, who claimed that makeup was the opiate
of the misses, we’re positively prochoice when it comes to matters of
feminine display …We’re well aware, thank you very much, of the beauty
myth that’s working to keep women obscene and not heard, but we just
don’t think that transvestites should have all the fun. We love our lipstick,
have a passion for polish, and, basically, adore this armour that we call
‘fashion’. To us, it’s fun, it’s feminine, and, in the particular way we flaunt
it, it’s *definitely* feminist (Stoller in Goldberg 2001).
This combination of language and imagery was designed to address young women who
were, at this point, feeling alienated from the second-wave feminists, who were
appearing more and more like authority figures and less like peers. Sexuality and gender
40 As Dick Hebdidge (1979) famously observed, this process of collaging cultural objectsand images was prevalent within various punk cultures from the 1970s onward.
125
were core issues within Riot Grrl culture. Performers like Kathleen Hanna appeared on
stage with the words CUNT, SLUT and RAPE written on their bodies, in a provocation
designed to confront issues of constraints placed on women’s sexuality. The sex
industry, including porn and stripping, was discussed extensively, particularly in the
writing and music of young women who worked within the industry itself.41 Sexuality
was represented within these texts both as a site of risk or fear and a site of sexual
power. Sex-positive ‘pioneers’ like Betty Dodson, Annie Sprinkle and Susie Bright
were represented as ‘she-roes’ and teachers within feminist subcultures, even by the
same young women who attended ‘Reclaim the Night’ rallies. As journalist Michelle
Goldberg explained:
Full of images of campy 50s pin-up girls and downtown rocker chicks and
stories about strong, brilliant women alongside first-person narratives both
humorous and heart-rending, [girlzines felt] like the coolest slumber party in the
world (Goldberg 2001)42.
While early forms of alternative media production were extremely underground, by the
late 1990s the ‘girl revolution’ had become sufficiently popularised (particularly through
the music and videos and associated media texts generated by and around artists like
Courtney Love, Fiona Apple and Alanis Morissette) to be worth ‘co-opting’ on a larger
scale. By the time the Spice Girls emerged with their calls for ‘Girl Power’, it was widely 41 Kimberly O’Sullivan notes that she and other Australian feminist sex activists also combined feminism with sex work in her ‘25 years on the left’ O’Sullivan 2002. 42 Given the fragility of zines, there are few hard-copy or online versions from the nineties still in circulation. However, two collections of US zine articles were published in book form in the late 1990s, and offer a great sampler. See Karp and Stoller 1999 and Taormino and Green 1997.
126
considered that the ‘real’ Riot Grrls had moved on. However, their legacy continued in
the form of popular media that represented female sexuality in aesthetic modes that were
playful but still confronting in heteronormative terms. As Ladendorf notes, Janice
Winship’s 1987 study of British women’s magazines strongly argued for the merging of
pleasure and aesthetics with feminist writing, and called for a new feminist media form
that seems to have a great deal in common with the girlzine genre that was born in the
1990s, and continues in various forms:
I’d like a new magazine to strive to create non-oppressive visual forms of
indulgent pleasures and fantasies …. Unless we try to do that it is difficult to
see how the nexus of femininity-desire-consumption which commercial
magazines and their adverts trade in can be broken or how a different visual
vocabulary around femininity and masculinity can be developed. Such a
visual project would have to give high priority to colour, glossy paper and to
advertising. It would probably involve re-using, making fun of and
commenting on the colour and stylistic conventions customarily used by
women’s magazines rather that wholly breaking away from that format ….
The post-modern reliance on retro styles which raid the past for its images
and re-present them in contemporary contexts makes such a design and
visual project more feasible (Winship 1987: 162).
Contemporary media representations of ‘empowered’ female sexuality may not
meet with the approval of feminists who eschew the overt performance of
sexualised femininity. There is no doubt that an image that seems to one viewer to
127
be fun, parodic and subversive can represents the reinscription of a repressive
‘norm’ to another. It is important, however, to acknowledge that audiences
interpret texts quite differently in different contexts. The imagery of girl zines was
assembled by girls themselves because it spoke to their own understanding of
sexuality in specific ways. As such, they offer a model of reparative reading,
writing and media production, by adapting media forms that previous feminists
had previously identified (and in some cases dismissed) as repressive
‘technologies of gender’ (see de Lauretis 1980). The eroticised imagery and texts
in girl zines both acknowledged the pleasurable aspects of popular culture’s
representations of female sexuality and critiqued and challenged elements within
these representations. By the turn of the century these alternative aesthetics, which
often combined iconography drawn from old Hollywood films and burlesque
posters with signs of contemporary sexual rebelliousness (such as tattooing and
body-piercing), had crossed over from queer and other sexual subcultures to more
mainstream media imagery, such as pornography.43
At the same time, an increasingly open mediasphere (facilitated by the Clinton/Lewinsky
sex scandal) was allowing discussions of sexual behaviour and sexual conduct to move
from the problem pages to the mainstream news and entertainment media. In crude terms,
the genie of ‘blatant’ sexuality was out of the bottle.44 The production of explicit or
blatant sexual texts and imagery was not limited to ‘alternative’ feminist subcultures. Just
as the women’s health movement influenced early producers and distributors of feminist
43 For an expanded discussion of girls’ adaptation of the punk ethos see Leblanc 1999. 44 For more on the ‘feminisation’ of the mediasphere see Catharine Lumby 1997,1999.
128
sexual material, individuals and groups within queer subcultures (particularly gay men)
also produced pornography in politicised contexts. In the UK and Australia, and to a
lesser degree the US, gay men’s health organisations responded to the HIV epidemic by
producing texts and images that eroticised both safer sex practices and affiliation with
gay communities. As Paul Sendziuk observes, as early as 1985 the Australian response to
AIDS included images and texts designed to convince gay men “that safe sex was not
only possible but that it was fun and pleasurable” (2003: 111). Early campaigns included
the ‘You’ll Never Forget the Feeling of Safe Sex’ poster and brochures that mimicked a
mainstream media advertising campaign (featuring a toned, naked man laying back
seductively in bed) for Sheridan sheets that was current at the time.
As in the women’s health movement of the 1970s, Australian peer educators sought to
demedicalise and demystify their constituency’s understanding of their own bodies, and
their healthcare. Consequently, educational material aimed at gay men used explicit
language like ‘don’t get cum up your bum’ (Sendziuk 2003: 113) and presented explicit
eroticised narratives of negotiating and practising safer sex.45 By the 1990s, campaigns
were more blatant than suggestive, and included detailed, colour images (in some cases
photographic) of sexual scenes with close-up images of erect penises. These were subject
to censorship in some cases (particularly in states that had stricter classification
guidelines, such as Queensland) and a distribution policy document was drafted to assist
45 The Terence Higgins trust in the UK also promoted safer sex through sexually explicit comic books and other graphic styles (McGrath 1993).
129
educators who had to field complaints from both offended citizens and concerned
politicians (see Leonard & Mitchell 2000).46 As Jeffreys Weeks noted in 1998:
One of the crucial things about the gay community is that it has been
explicitly organised around sexuality, which makes it easier to talk about
sexuality in relationship to the AIDS crisis. Other communities are not so
explicitly organised around sexual issues and therefore have been more
reluctant to discuss issues about unsafe sexual practices and changing sexual
behaviour (Weeks in Sendziuk 2003: 113; see also Patton 1990, 1996).
It makes sense, then, that women who were both comfortable with sexual explicitness
and affiliated with queer and other sexual subcultures would want to adopt these
strategies. Annie Sprinkle (who was at that time still primarily a ‘straight’ sex worker)
was employed by Gay Men’s Health Crisis in 1987 to make a lesbian safer sex video,
Current Flow, which was designed to both demonstrate and promote the use of latex
barriers in woman-to-woman sex. Sprinkle, who had lost several friends, lovers and
fellow sex workers to HIV, believed that “if everyone in porn started using safer sex,
people could see exactly how to do it and see that safer sex could be hot sex” (2001: 56).
Although Sprinkle herself practiced safer sex in all subsequent films she played in or
produced, the heterosexual porn industry was slow to pick up the message.47 However,
46 For an account of Australian safer sex promotion material an artwork that eroticised no just ‘protection’ but also positive men’s sexuality see Gott 1997. 47 Sprinkle has described her move from ‘hardcore’ to ‘new age’ sexual exploration as a direct response to the grief and loss she experienced in the 1980s, particularly during the time her lover, Marco Vassi, was dying from AIDS related illness. In the absence of clear safer sex guidelines, Sprinkle explains that she and Vassi “were forced to be more creative and experimental, to expand our concept of sex”, incorporating
130
queer/feminist sex-educators and sex workers such as Susie Bright, Carol Queen, Nina
Hartley, Tristan Taormino, Shar Rednour and Jackie Strano would, from the mid-1990s
onwards, produce and distribute pornography that was explicitly designed to be
‘educational’ as well as erotic.
Alternative porn genres: edu-porn, docu-porn, community porn
Although Levy and others (e.g. Wolf 1997; Jeffreys 2005) have argued that contemporary
sexual aesthetics have been ‘corrupted’ by the popularisation of pornography, I argue that
even the most commercial image contains the possibility for an original a productive
rereading by consumers. Since there is no ‘outside’ of discourse, women must perform
sex and gender in recognisable ways. For those who wish to explore the production and
consumption of queer/feminist porn, this means producing and consuming texts that look,
in many ways, similar to ‘masculine’ pornography. For some, this production and
consumption is viewed as a form of ‘drag’, or a kind of transgression of male privilege
(see Califia 1992). For others, the production and consumption of porn is seen as a kind
of ‘outreach’, or a means of communicating non-normative thinking on sex to an
audience that might be wary of radical or avant-garde media forms but receptive to
radical content. Shar Rednour and Jackie Strano ‘trained’ at Fatale Media and Good
Vibrations respectively. In 1998 the couple established SIR video, a production company
techniques borrowed from Taoist, tantric and Native American teachers (1999: 153). She later worked with Joseph Kramer to create Erotic Massage Rituals for men and women. These rituals were designed to recreate the heightened states of pleasure gay men had been experiencing through sex and drugs, with minimal transmission of body fluids. Sprinkle offers very non-threatening straight-friendly ‘how-to’ erotic massage instructions for men and women in her self-help book Dr Sprinkle’s Spectacular Sex Life Makeover Penguin (2005).
131
for ‘alternative’ pornography. Their first videos, Bend Over Boyfriend (BOB) and Bend
Over Boyfriend 2, featured bisexual activist (and ex-lesbian separatist) Carol Queen and
her partner Robert Lawrence consciously and graphically instructing male/female couples
on the art of male-receptive anal sex (see Queen 1999). The BOB films were described
by one feminist reviewer as ‘a new generation of sexy sex ed, an eye-opening foray into
the taboo region of straight, male, virgin ass’ (Firefox 2002). In the films, sex worker and
qualified sexologist Dr Carol Queen (whose publications include Exhibitionism for the
Shy) comments that being communicative might be:
a ‘new thing’ for the ‘ladies’, who are probably ‘not used to’
communicating what they want or do not want from their men, but
can, and must listen, while their men voice what they want, for anal
sex obviously warrants more communication than ordinary hetero sex.
Queen even expresses the hope that this communicative effort might
have some influence on one’s regular, non-communicative sex life
(Butler 2004: 190).
Both the BOB videos, and SIR’s later films Hard Love and How to Fuck in High Heels
include explicit or implicit instruction on the use of explicit ‘dirty talk’ as eroticised
sexual negotiation. As producer and performer Shar Rednour puts it:
What we do, we do because we don’t get excited by the porn that’s out
there. Also, we know as sex educators that there’s not enough dirty talking
132
out there, and we feel like communication transforms people’s sex lives. It
can transform regular people into sex stars (Rednour in Firefox 2002).
Like the zine scene, SIR Videos reflect the DIY ethos:
‘We’re like the punk rock company’, says Jackie. They [SIR] made both
Hard Love (in which Jackie stars) and How to Fuck in High Heels (Shar’s
star vehicle) in four days -- and had time to shoot a music video for one of
The Hail Marys' songs and throw themselves a benefit so they could pay for
renting the cameras, to boot (Queen 2001b).
Like the BOB videos, SIR’s dyke videos reflect a politicised erotic ethos. Hard Love and
How to Fuck in High Heels emphasise verbal negotiation as a conduit to pleasure. As
Heather Butler describes it:
Dildo penetration (or rather, the dyke who penetrates) is always concerned
with the woman penetrated; there is a constant need for affirmation. ‘Is this
ok?’ and ‘Does that feel good?’ are two questions asked repeatedly and with
apparent sincerity throughout the film (Butler 2004: 187).
In her study of lesbian porn (and the lesbian-produced BOB series), Butler states that “if
lesbians attempt to educate … the hetero mass, they not only contribute something
authentic to this world that would completely exclude them otherwise but they make their
133
own desire visible as well” (2004: 191-192). While I am not entirely convinced by claims
of absolute authenticity, Butler’s argument certainly resonates with my readings of
queer/feminist-produced sexually explicit media. Like heterosexual amateur videos, these
films attempt to both document a sense of ‘realness’ in sexual experience and instruct
audiences in alternative sexual pleasures and practices. Even when these claims for
instruction are utopian or liberationist (and many of them are), I argue that their
popularisation demonstrates the potential for a more general openness to alternatives to
heteronormativity. Unlike Levy, I do not see the uptake of ‘feminist’ porn as a sign that
misogyny will always win the day. Instead I see it as a sign that quite radical sexual ideas
and languages can be readily translatable into normative cultures, and can not only be co-
opted but can actually change the cultures that incorporate them, in unpredictable ways.
Others, such as On Our Backs alumna Susie Bright see the mainstreaming of raunch
culture as part of a history of the commodification of ‘countercultural’ politics, which has
a history she tracks back to the 1960s and the popularisation of the ‘Bond Girl’ and
‘Playboy Bunny’ as ‘liberated women’:
It’s obvious to ME that the ripoff of sex positive feminism had nothing to
with its progenitors; rather it’s a betrayal. When I think of girls digging sex
w/men and cock, do I think of Girls Gone Wild? Of course not! My role
models for self-aware straight women would be the Sweet Action magazine
coven: women who doing DIY [porn with a] girl p.o.v., with no apologies,
and as you will see from their mags, no bullshit to please anyone but
themselves (Bright 2005b).
134
In the next two chapters I will explore some of the ways that public discourses of gender
and sexuality have shifted in the past ten years. I will link these changes to various shifts
in popular understandings of sexuality, and argue that queer and feminist critiques of
heteronormative culture have in fact changed popular sex-related media considerably. In
particular I will examine the ways that representations of sex have been linked to
technological changes, and look at the potential for the ‘democratisation of desire’
(McNair 2002) that is offered by amateur porn websites and swingers contact magazines.
I will also look at the ways that representations of male and female-embodied eroticism
have changed in response to parallel shifts in pornography and popular sex education. In
doing so, I will make a case for an ethics-based reading of sexually explicit media that
does not look at porn (and related texts) as ‘good’ or ‘bad’ representations but instead
asks what porn is doing and what it can be made to do in the future. In doing so, I will
draw on histories that link popular sexual discourses to technological changes, and point
to some of the ways popular understandings of sexual bodies and sexual acts can be seen
to change rapidly in these contexts.
135
Chapter 4
Out of the bedroom … heterosexuality in amateur
porn
Commentators such as Ariel Levy who decry the ‘sexualisation’ of the media and popular
culture tend to position the home as a refuge from sexuality, yet one which is increasingly
subjected to explicit ‘home invasions’ by television programs and pornographic websites.
This conflict around the role of sex in the home reflects the contradictions between
constructions of ‘healthy’ and ‘perverse’ sexuality, and the gendering of domestic space
as private, feminine, and therefore ‘not perverse’. In addition to this opposition of healthy
and unhealthy (gendered) sexualities, there is a tension between the ‘real’ and the ‘fake’
in the representation of sexuality, in which private, domestic sex is presumed to be more
real than mediated sex. Pornography is generally assumed to be a ‘male’ discourse and
therefore falls into the category of ‘public sex’, with the potential to threaten the stability
of the private space of domesticated sexuality. Even more than other forms of popular
media, porn is represented as contaminating (potentially addictive) substance which only
ever comes in from ‘outside’. Moreover, porn is frequently read within theorisations of
popular media as a ‘fake’ genre, despite its intrinsic links with the history of photography
and cinema as modern technologies of knowledge which reveal the truth about ‘real’ life.
As I will demonstrate, ‘real’ domestic sexual practices and ‘fake’ representations of sex
are hard to separate in a realm where images and bodies interact in complex ways.
136
I am not proposing that sex within the bedroom is itself ‘normal’ as in ‘boring’ (as
opposed to transgressive sex which occurs ‘outside’), nor that pornographic sex is ‘better’
or ‘more real’ than non-pornographic sex. Rather, I am interested in the ways that the
discourses of heterosex that are produced within these ‘private’ spaces complicate
assumptions about the ‘inside’ and ‘outside’ of heterosexuality. Amateur and home-made
pornographic pictures, videos, websites and stories reveal a ‘domesticated’ sexuality
which does not seek to hide itself or to subject itself to ‘expert’ assessments. These are
images which are created and circulated within and between domestic spaces, via new
technologies – from the handycams and VCRs of the 1980s to the webcams of the new
century. The culture of home-made porn, I will argue, reveals the tenuousness of
heteronormativity itself, by blurring normative boundaries between private and public,
everydayness and celebrity/stardom. Unlike the normalising discourses of sex advisers
and educators, amateur heterosexual porn both eroticises and disturbs constructions of
gender difference when it comes to sex. Further, the eroticisation of sexual exhibitionism
in a non-commercial genre troubles screen studies’ theories of the ‘gaze’ and ‘reality’ in
the viewing economies of porn, by challenging the boundaries drawn between the
producer and the consumer of media texts.
The history of porn/reality
Linda Williams argues against the psychoanalytic readings of visual pleasure, such as
those proposed by Metz (1977) and Mulvey (1975), which represent the viewing subject
as a fetishist who takes pleasure not in the ‘reality’ of cinematic representation, but in his
137
fantasy of a missing signifier – “the absence in the image of the materially real object”
(Williams 1989: 44). As Williams puts it, these theories are problematic in that they do
not take into account the specific technologies of visibility which cinema and
photography offer. It is as though “the effect of the cinematic apparatus [is] simply an
enhancement of perverse desires that already exist in the subject” (1989: 45). Instead,
Williams looks to the origins of cinema, particularly photographer Eadweard
Muybridge’s stop-motion studies of naked men and women in his 1887 Animal
Locomotion (popular with both scientists and the public of the day). The desire to know
the ‘truth’ of human bodies and human movement was fuelled, Williams argues, by the
development of photographic technologies which made bodies more and more visible.48
Cinema and photography were in themselves ‘transfer points’ of power/knowledge and
pleasure, enmeshing scientia sexualis in a ‘frenzy of the visible’, a desire to know and,
more importantly, to see the truth of sexual difference, of bodily movement, and bodily
pleasures. Early pornography thus developed hand in hand with early documentary
photography and filmmaking. The narrative involved was the narrative of sex itself, and
the desire to ‘reveal’ all that could be seen in sexual movement.
Women were particularly sexualised and fetishised in Muybridge’s photographs, but
Williams argues against the psychoanalytic model, advanced by Mulvey, that this
fetishisation places women outside of the ‘patriarchal’ agency of the masculinist
narrative. Instead, Williams proposes that Muybridge’s ‘artistic’ depiction of women
twirling, flirting with fans, and lying down on beds (rather than simply running, jumping 48 Williams also discusses Thomas Edison's unreleased 1893/94 Kinetoscope film Fred Ott's Sneeze as an example of the earliest cinematic attempt to represent the truth of bodies in motion, noting that Edison originally wanted an attractive young woman to 'perform' the sneeze, but settled on a male subject due to time restraints (1989: 51-52).
138
or posing with tools as his male subjects did) seems to act as an almost plaintive ‘call for
narrative’, a narrative of elusive bodily ‘truth’ that evaded the camera’s gaze. Williams
does not deny that photography and cinema have largely constructed and represented
women’s bodies as objects, rather than subjects. However, she breaks from feminist
naturalising of this tendency as an essential feature of ‘masculine’ genres of
representation, to present a more Foucauldian argument—that the desire to uncover or
capture the truth or ‘realness’ of bodies (and sexualities) is indeed embedded in the very
origins of cinema and photography. This is not, however, the result of inherent drives
within the male (scientific) psyche, but rather results from a psychic, social and
technological apparatus which coincided at a particular place and time, “working together
to channel the scientific discovery of bodily movement into new forms of knowledge and
pleasure” (1989: 45). For Williams, then, the history of photographic and cinematic
pornography should be examined in Focauldian terms, not as evidence of “the eternal
nature of the perverse pleasures of the apparatus, but their specific historical and social
construction” (1989: 45).
From Muybridge’s studies of female nudes to Charcot’s photographs of hysterics’
‘paroxysms’, the ‘truth’ of women’s bodies was solicited as a source of both knowledge
and pleasure for male audiences. The incitement and ‘interpretation’ of sexualised
display was (like the incitement to ‘speak one’s sex’ to the confessor or analyst) “not
simply a mechanism of power and control, opposed to pleasure, but a mode of pleasure in
and of itself” (Foucault 1990: 71). It was a short step from these scientific studies to the
coin operated Kinetograph and Kinetoscope, and the primitive ‘stag’ or ‘smoker’ film,
which Williams (and others) have argued served not only to entertain and arouse but to
139
drum up business for sex workers in the brothels in which such illicit films were
screened. These films tended to take the form of what Williams terms a ‘genital show’
(i.e. women stripping, bending over, spreading their legs for the camera) or a series of
randomly connected ‘genital events’ or discontinuous sex scenes, rather than offering the
narrative closure which contemporary professional porn offers in the ‘money shot’
(Williams 1989).
It was not just the technology of cinema that linked the clean, public world of science
with the dirty counter-public world of commercial sex and sexual entertainment. Since
‘good’ women have not, historically, publicly displayed their naked bodies, let alone their
genitals, the performers in scientific or ‘educational’ films have traditionally been
recruited from the sex industry. The traditional poses of the artist’s model, as played out
by Muybridge’s models, were often assumed by women who also worked as actresses,
dancers, and/or part-time prostitutes. That is, they were considered very much outsiders
to the private, heteronormative family home of the time, yet their images were part of
‘everyday’ or domestic explorations of technologised entertainment.
As Terri Kapsalis points out, the role of the woman who performs her sexuality in public,
even in a ‘scientific’ context, is still a highly tenuous one. Public performances of ‘real
sex’ are always ‘tainted’ by the pornographic, even (especially) in settings which
scrupulously defend themselves against the possibility (Kapsalis 1997). Kapsalis quotes
from a medical training text which specifically asks the question, “What kind of woman
lets four or five medical students examine her?” (Blithe in Kapsalis 1997: 93) The
answer, by implication, is ‘a whore’. Drawing on her own experience as a ‘gynaecology
140
teaching associate’, that is, a live teaching tool who talks medical students through the
pelvic exams they are learning to perform on her body, Kapsalis explores the uneasy role
women’s sexualised bodies continue to play in scientific documents and practices. She
recounts two anecdotes which indicate that the boundaries that separate scientific images
from pornography are still fragile, and easily threatened: one in which a nervous medical
student is given a Penthouse to prepare him for his gynaecological exam, another where
the illustrators of a medical textbook seek out photographs by pornographic performer
and photographer Annie Sprinkle. In the first, a medical ‘expert’ who has never actually
seen a ‘real’ woman’s body is instructed through pornography. In the second, textbook
editors specifically seek out photographs taken by a ‘pornographer’, but reject one of
Sprinkle’s photographs – a woman spreading her labia to reveal an enlarged clitoris –
because the model is wearing red fingernail polish (1997: 83).
While, as Kapsalis observes, the discipline of gynaecology is able to preserve its
boundaries by privileging images of ‘pathology’ (hence the importance of the enlarged
clitoris), sexological illustrations and videos have more difficulty. As Janice Irvine
(1990) points out, ‘modern’ scientific sexology, as pioneered by the work of Kinsey and
Masters and Johnson, was completely interwoven with illicit sex and commercial sexual
performance. Both male and female sex workers were employed to answer questionnaires
and perform solo and coupled sex in front of laboratory cameras. As with the scientia
sexualis of the nineteenth century, private, heteronormative sexuality was redefined and
reclassified by means of ‘expert’ surveillance of those who were considered to be way
outside the norm. As Irvine puts it, “from Masters’ descriptions, it seems his relationship
to the prostitutes was not that of researcher to subject, but essentially that of collaborator
141
– an interesting departure from the tradition of early sexologists” (Irvine 1990: 82).49
It is interesting to consider whether the attitude of the researcher to their research subject
is ever ‘visible’ in the resulting sexual documentation, or whether a film produced by a
collaborative or ‘friendly’ researcher appears to be exactly the same as one produced by a
researcher who condemns the subject. Although it is beyond the scope of this thesis to
fully explore this issue, it does raise interesting questions in relation to arguments about
whether the intentions or attitudes of ‘pornographers’ can be interpreted through their
products – that is, whether the same act filmed by a ‘good’, ethical pornographer and a
‘bad’, exploitative pornographer will look markedly different from one another. In his
history of the ‘sexual revolution’ in the late twentieth century, John Heidenry describes a
1958 medical education film of a woman masturbating (wearing only the significantly
unscientific red nail-polish) to orgasm on a hospital bed while a speculum allows an eight
millimetre camera to film the interior of her vagina.50 The film, he observes, is “the
original low-tech Story of O, an earnest and clumsy cross between an industrial training
film and a stag movie” (Heidenry 1997:18). Despite a pedantic voice-over and white
arrows superimposed to draw attention to flushed cheeks and swollen areolae, the film is,
Heidenry suggests, as ‘pornographic’ as it is ‘scientific’.
When the ‘truth’ of a woman’s body is publicly revealed, the image must be classifiable,
49 Interestingly, Irvine notes that the ‘respectable’ (and largely heterosexual) volunteers who performed for Masters' cameras were largely recruits from the 'metropolitan, academic community', and as such were largely 'white, upper-middle-class, and highly educated' (1990:82) Waugh (1996) specifically compares the videos made for Kinsey's research by heterosexual couples with those made by gay males. While some gay sex workers were paid by Kinsey for their 'demonstrations', other amateur men (including a young Allen Ginsburg and his lover) embraced the opportunity to perform sex for science. 50 The sexual 'truth' revealed by this film is particularly confronting to the accepted wisdom of the day – the woman masturbates by rubbing her clitoris, but orgasmic contractions are evident inside her vagina – thus revealing that clitoral and vaginal orgasms are not separate occurrences (see Heidenry, 1997).
142
either as art, medical illustration (or case study) or pornography. As in the case of
Sprinkle’s photograph, the most minimal costuming in the form of red nail-polish on an
anonymous, disembodied hand can cause a photo or video to be instantly classified as
‘porn’ rather than ‘science’.51 Sex can never be objectively represented as a set of ‘facts’.
The facts themselves are always subject to interpretation, according to context and
prevailing discourses. As Foucault has argued, sexuality forms the ‘core’ of modern
subjectivity. Sex is supposed to be the most authentic, most intimate, most individual,
most real of all human experiences. The truth of sexuality is both mysterious and
obvious. Yet the truth of the body, and the authenticity of its pleasures, are so easily
displayed or faked in pornography. In ‘legitimate’ cinema and photography, the truth of
sex may be explored through conventions of storytelling and performance, but genitals
must be discreetly concealed, and the truths of the genital show or genital event must be
implied through simulation only.52 The technology of pornographic photography, and
later cinema and video, is paradoxically claimed to both reveal the truth of human
sexuality and to dehumanise the most human of all activities. As Gertrud Koch puts it:
the aesthetic of the pornographic film relies on an underlying metaphor of the
body as a machine: editing makes it possible to replace tired bodies with fresh
51 The Australian Office of Film and Literature Classification (OFLC) has created a particularly interesting system of 'reading' genitals in the context of the classification system. In order to sell a magazine in newsagents, without a sealed plastic wrapper, photographs must contain only 'discreet genital detail'. Given that most women's internal labia protrude beyond their outer labia, soft core porn magazines such as Picture and People must digitally manipulate photographs of vulvas and vaginas, removing the inner labia, which are deemed 'too explicit'. In 2000, the editor of the now defunct Australian Women's Forum , Helen Vnuk, was told by the OFLC that she could not run explicit photographs of labia in a 'women's health' article on genital plastic surgery. The rationale given was that the illustrations were ‘prominent and contained genital emphasis’ (Vnuk, 2001: 7). Whereas the medical textbook editors took issue to the model's red nail polish in the interests of depicting a de-eroticised genital truth, the OFLC demanded that the objective 'reality' of individual genitalia be re-shaped to fit a legal model of de-eroticised genitalia. 52 Hence the problem for classifiers of films like Romance, Intimacy and Baise Moi, where certain meta-truths about love, gender relations or sexuality are present alongside graphic genital 'reality'.
143
ones, or with those that have been replenished in the interim ... Now we have
high performance professionals who, in the manner of Taylorisation,
contribute specialised skills to the completion of the final project (1993: 35).
Like many of those who discuss pornography, however, Koch, I would argue, implicitly
places the ‘aesthetic of pornography’ outside of the aesthetic of mainstream cinema.
Williams’ example of Muybridge’s photography, Kapsalis’s medical textbooks and
Heidenry’s training video all serve to demonstrate how closely interwoven seemingly
different visual representations of ‘truth’ and ‘pleasure’ really are. On the most literal
level, it is clear that the histories of licit and illicit cinema and photography are not
separate or exclusive. As Thomas Waugh argues in his exhaustive history of gay
pornography, Hard To Imagine (1996), since the eighteenth century ‘respectable’
photographic studios and photographic ‘artists’ have also produced explicit material, for
their own private use or commercial distribution. While it is quite difficult for
professional porn performers to work in mainstream Hollywood cinema, producers,
directors and film crews do not tend to encounter the same obstacles. Like pornography,
both fiction/narrative cinema and non-fiction/documentary films and television programs
must engage with the problems of representing ‘believable’ realities, even if those film
and video realities exist beyond the realities of everyday life.
As Williams (1989) argues compellingly, it is disingenuous to criticise the ‘fakeness’ of
pornography, as if other cinematic conventions are ‘real’. For example, actors in
narrative/fictional films and television perform intimate love scenes with strangers, and
fake emotions like fear and anger for the camera. This faking is designed to produce a
144
real response from the audience – excitement, laughter, empathy or disgust. The success
of a performance is gauged not by the actor’s experience of their performance but by the
audience’s response to what is seen on screen. As Joel Black puts it, all film and
television, be it fiction or non-fiction, primarily presents “truth as visual spectacle”
(Black 2002: 8). In many cases, the ‘truth’ of non-pornographic film and television does
not even stem from the believability of individual performances but from a more general
‘reality effect’. In special effects genre films (e.g. horror, action/adventure, disaster)
‘reality’ is produced through graphic, explicit or literal depictions of unreal events (2002:
8). For Black:
Graphic depictions of sex and violence in contemporary film, and cinema’s
preoccupation with scenes of bodily ecstasy and suffering, all arise out of a
quasi-scientific, documentary impulse that has come to pervade even the most
non-realistic fictional entertainments, and that attempts to disclose some
elusive truth concealed behind a hypermediated world of special effects
(2002: 30).
However, while Black challenges the conventions of cinema theory which locate the
depiction of reality ‘outside’ of the fiction film, he too discusses pornography’s faking
through the representation of real sex as if it produces some kind of fundamentally
different effect to that of other film and video forms. Black argues that pornography
(unlike other forms) fails in its depiction of reality, deluding its viewers: “the ultimate or
absolute reality that the porn junkie believes he or she has entered is ‘in fact’ a realm of
the senses, but more accurately, it is a tyranny of the visual where sight reigns over all the
145
other senses including that of touch” (Black 2002: 47). Setting aside the question of
whether or not Black should refer to consumers of other genres as ‘junkies’, it seems to
me quite strange to single out ‘the tyranny of the visual’ within pornography. After all,
we do not expect to experience other forms of cinema and television through the senses
of smell, taste or touch. Even in high-tech disaster movies such as Titanic, where
subsonic rumbles literally move us in our seats, audiences are primarily experiencing
sensory reality through the visual. This does not mean, however, that we cannot
experience real, embodied arousal during the love scenes, real fear as the ship begins to
sink, or real excitement as Kate Winslet rescues Leonardo DiCaprio in the nick of time.
We may even (as I did) shiver with cold as the shipwrecked passengers float in the icy
sea, or shed tears as DiCaprio’s character slowly freezes to death, sacrificing himself to
save the woman he loves.
Richard Dyer (1995) argues that pornography, which seeks to ‘move’ the viewer to
arousal and masturbation, should be understood in the context of Tom Gunning’s (1986)
theorisation of the early ‘cinema of attractions’ which linked ‘realism’ within film
technique with vaudevillian narrative convention. The film Titanic itself not only fits the
‘attraction’ genre of the ‘weepie’, but is also a perfect example of Black’s thesis
regarding the blurring of fiction and non-fiction/documentary in the production of ‘the
reality effect’. The use of ‘scientific’ framing for the fictional narrative is combined with
painstaking recreations of the ‘real’ Titanic’s disastrous journey. It could be argued that
all the painstaking recreation of period setting and costume is merely foreplay for the
climactically ‘real’ disaster of the ship’s sinking.
146
Like feminists who argue that pornography ‘is’ sexual violence, Black seems to believe
that porn is attempting not to depict real genital displays and events, but to ‘be’ real sex
for its audience. Just as audiences today no longer accept a documentary film of a train
pulling into a station as a real event, I contend that porn audiences understand that, while
they may be aroused by and masturbate along with porn images, they are not literally
‘having sex’ with the performers who facilitate their pleasure. At the same time, a porn
spectator may feel moved by or drawn to a particular performance or performer, in the
same way that fans are drawn to non-pornographic performers. The fan’s connection to
the celebrity is ‘real’ to them, but only a very deranged fan would claim to believe that
the star is moved in return.
Black is not the only commentator to argue that porn fails in its depiction of real sex. In
their comparison of mainstream pornography and ethnographic documentary, Christian
Hansen, Catherine Needham and Bill Nichols (1991) argue that both genres make a false
promise to reveal the pleasure of knowing truth or reality of the Other – women/sexuality
in pornography, exotic cultures in ethnography. Hansen et al further represent porn as
particularly manipulative and ‘unreal’ since viewers can never experience real pleasure
but only the illusory pleasure of representation (1991: 225). The authors either ignore (or
are ignorant of) the interactive nature of porn spectatorship. While they claim that ‘we’
(the viewers of porn and ethnography) must “defer our own pleasure, perhaps
indefinitely, in favour of those who represent its fullest satisfaction [the actors], nothing
could be further from the experience of watching porn at home” (1991: 225). Since the
1980s, pornographic motion pictures have been largely viewed at home, on domestic
VCRs and, more recently, computer terminals and DVD players. While consumers of
147
porn are not always happy with the quality of the porn they buy, rent or borrow, they
certainly are not at the mercy of the director’s narrative or editing decisions. Narrative is
provided by the viewer, through their interpretation of facial expression, gesture, sound,
costume and bodily movement. Images on screen can be accepted or rejected, and viewed
repeatedly, or not at all, according to their ‘match’ with the viewer’s own ‘real-time’
fantasy/masturbatory imagination. Home porn viewers using their remotes to skip boring
dialogue or loop exciting scenes are effectively amateur editors, able to impose the
narrative of their own sexual tension and resolution over that of the director and on-
screen actors.
It is not only the mode of domestic consumption of pornography which conflicts with
academic theorisations of pornographic representation as ‘fake sex’. Hansen et al (1991)
claim commercial, heterosexual pornography’s allegedly manipulative intent is ‘troubled’
by both self-representation in gay and lesbian film and by the home-made porn circulated
by heterosexual amateurs. I would suggest, however, that those who theorise heterosex
and pornography are more likely to be troubled by these genres than the producers of
mainstream porn. In fact, producers of commercial pornography have been so receptive to
queer self-representation that Shar Rednour and Jackie Strano’s butch-femme production
Hard Love and How to Fuck in High Heels was awarded ‘Best All-Girl Feature’ title at
the 2001 Adult Video Awards (also known as the ‘Porn Oscars’). For Hansen et al:
two forms of potential ‘trouble’ ... are lesbian, often recuperated by being
structured for a male gaze, and love, often recuperated as receptive to open
and swinging relationships. Another risk would be the absorption of
148
[amateur] characters in their own pleasure [to the extent that there is no
external cum shot]. Absorption might also include the loss of performers to
the ideal spectator when they no longer tacitly arrange themselves as though
at the behest of an invisible, orchestrating presence (1991: 226).
Implicit in this argument is an assumption that amateur porn performers wish to ‘resist’
the gaze of the pornographic consumer. Yet why would an individual, couple or group
produce and circulate home-made amateur pornography (Hansen et al are specifically
referring to tapes which do not enter into the mainstream, commercial economy) if not to
be seen by porn consumers? I argue that amateurs see themselves as part of an (albeit
very loose) community of fans, connoisseurs, exhibitionists and voyeurs. They are not
only the producers of pornography—they are also their own ‘ideal spectators’ who take
reflexive pleasure in the knowledge that they are both objects and subjects of the
pornographic gaze. Whether this gaze has the same meaning for them that it does to
theorists of spectatorship is another question entirely. As Waugh (1996) says of gay
erotica, pornographic representation, be it amateur or commercial, can take many forms,
each with different potential:
from the nonsexual portrait of the loved one, to his unclothed body; explicit
depictions of fucking, whether nonloving and mechanical or imbued with ...
romantic patinas ...; both narrative representations (stories of desire) and
nonnarrative (views of the object desired); not only depictions and narrations
but also enunciations of desire (‘I love you’ – whether reciprocated, tolerated
or unnoticed ...), performances (‘here I am being desirable’), and even
149
prescriptions (‘here is how to make love’); from the psychological or spiritual
to the physiological, from the symbolic to the literal, from the exalted to the
sleazy; from the embroidery of the fetish or symbol, to the look that strips
bare (1996: 7).
For many, the fantasy of ‘being porn’ may confer its own form of sexual reality.
Domestic pornstars
WANTED! LADIES FOR PLAY Newport. Hi, we are a hot young horny
couple who are looking for ladies who would like to watch us have sex and
who would like to play with my wife while we fuck. We are very horny so sex
is practiced quite often. We are new to the porn industry and hope that one
day we can actually star in one [sic] or a magazine or video would be nice.
Please feel free to send a pic with your reply, the sooner you reply the sooner
the hot sex can start. We hope to hear from you soon, hope you like the pics.
We want to do more so if you like them we’ll send more, ok seeya. Love and
kisses D&J. All replies answered (Advertisement in Australasian Vicsin [sic]
a Melbourne-based swingers magazine, March 2002).
Five photos, clearly taken at home with a tripod, accompany this ad. Four out of
five show conventional, close-up ‘porn’ shots (vaginal penetration from behind,
fellatio, etc). Unlike most photos in this (and other) swingers magazines, where
participants are either nude or ‘erotically’ costumed, the woman wears a striped,
sleeveless casual dress, while the man wears a tracksuit and T-shirt (and running
150
shoes in one photo). His fly is undone so that his erect penis is visible, and her dress
is pushed up to reveal her buttocks and pubic hair, but almost no genital detail.
Hands with wedding rings (his and hers) are visible in two of the pictures, but the
most interesting overlap of porn and domesticity occurs in the only full-body shot.
The couple are posed in profile, in ‘doggie’ position (both still clothed as
described), both smiling. She is looking slightly downward and ahead, while he is
turning his head to smile at the camera. Both have what could be described as
‘average looks’ (i.e. they are clearly not professional models). Neither D nor J have
‘model’ bodies: he has a bit of a belly, and she has stretch marks on her thighs and
buttocks, and a rounded body. This photo is clearly taken in the couple’s
loungeroom: a chair, a flower arrangement, a telephone table with heart-shaped cut-
outs, and an entertainment unit are visible in the background. It is not well framed:
the edge of her head is slightly out of frame on the left, while on the right
something that appears to be an open door with a towel draped over it juts in. This
picture, even more than the others, emphasises the ‘amateur’ status of D and J. Not
only is the photo clearly the work of a home photographer using the timer on their
camera, but the television and stereo, and the wall above them, are covered in
framed family photos. Although very little detail can be made out in the magazine
reproduction, it is clear that some of the photos are studio portraits of a family
group, some are mother-and-baby pictures, and some are snapshots of children.
Others show adults alone, or in affectionate group poses.
D and J are indeed ‘new to the porn industry’. Like many amateurs they are able to ‘play’
at being pornstars by photographing themselves having sex, by advertising for new
151
partners, and, most importantly, by appearing in a full-page ad in a swingers magazine
which includes not only other amateur photos but photo spreads by professional porn
models. D and J seek ‘exposure’ in an environment that invites both contributors and
readers to blur the boundaries of amateurism with professionalism, for their own sexual
pleasure. Many advertisers in Australian Vicsin (as in other swingers magazines) seek
actual contact with potential sexual partners, and indicate their tastes and level of
experience (phrases like ‘bi-curious’, ‘first-timer’ and ‘limits respected’ are common).
Others, however, advertise as ‘collectors’ who merely seek to exchange photographs or
invite fantasy-driven written and/or telephone correspondence with other amateurs. It is
clear, also, that there are readers who respond to ads without actually intending to make
contact – these are the ‘time-wasters’ to whom ‘genuine’ advertisers advise should not
reply.
This ad seems an extreme example of the blurring of public and private sexualities in
amateur porn, with its almost naive exposure of the family that exists around the
fantasising couple. The reference to ‘my wife’ suggests that the male partner has
submitted the ad, and classical radical feminist analyses of pornography would suggest
that if the female partner has actively participated it is only the result of coercion by, or
collusion with, the patriarchal male. Yet the (as yet limited) specific academic research
into amateur porn suggests that this may not necessarily be the case – that women
participate as enthusiastically as men, despite having a lot more to lose in terms of
acceptable hetero-feminine identity.53
53 See Barcan 2000.
152
Amateurs and porn reality
In her study of contemporary amateur porn as a ‘reality’ genre, Ruth Barcan (2002)
contests Roland Barthes’ claim that professional striptease was (by 1957!) so “unreal,
smooth and enclosed like a beautiful slippery object” (cited in Barcan 2002: 1), that the
rawness and awkwardness of the naked amateur offered greater erotic value.
Interestingly, Williams contrasts the stylised ritual of the classical live professional
striptease with what she describes as the ‘crude, awkward, and amateurish’ performance
of the early twentieth-century stag actresses (Williams 1989: 77). The live professional
stripshow offers the promise of verbal, physical and possibly sexual contact between the
stripper and her audience. However, since each audience member must be addressed as a
potential sexual partner, no one audience member in particular can be singled out and
satisfied to the exclusion of others. The stylisation and theatricality of the performance
ensures that no audience member will experience this lack of ‘closure’ as rejection;
instead, each viewer understands that his fantasy is being provoked as part of ‘the act’. In
contrast, Williams argues, while the stag actress’s performance is less polished, this
amateurish aesthetic is ‘a crucial aspect of the very different visual pleasures’ of the stag
film:
The performer’s self-consciousness, the smiles and giggles that would be out
of place either in a professional stripper’s act or in ... a feature-length hard-
core narrative, become her a form of reassurance that this show is no act
(1989:78).
As with her article ‘Home on the Rage’ (2000), Barcan’s work is part of a broader study
153
of public nudity in contemporary Australian culture. While her work usefully challenges
and productively intersects with my own work on ‘Home Girls and Home Blokes’ (see
Albury 1997), I would seek to expand Barcan’s arguments about representations of
ordinariness and celebrity in amateur heterosexual porn by examining not only
‘unrestricted’ representations of nudity but Category One and Two discussions and
depictions of heterosex: the pictures and texts that appear on internet webcam sites, in
chatrooms, in amateur videos and in the pages on swingers contact magazines54. Just as
reality television and ‘factual entertainment’ programs, from talkshows to ‘docusoaps’
(such as Popstars), have blurred the boundaries between celebrities and ordinary people,
so amateur porn has blurred the boundaries of ‘pornstardom’ and ordinary
heterosexuality, of kink and domesticity, of public and private sex.55
While this chapter has focused, largely, on amateur pornographic self-representation, it is
important to note that the terms ‘amateur porn’ or ‘DIY porn’ might also refer to recycled
non-pornographic mainstream media texts. These texts are collected, edited or digitally
altered to create specialist erotica – for example, websites or magazines which collect
pictures of celebrities smoking, or showing their naked feet. For a foot fetishist, a shot of
Meg Ryan which foregrounds her bare feet may be more arousing than the more
mainstream ‘celebrity skin’ paparazzi shot of topless sunbathers, freeze-frame shots of
nude scenes from movies or, for that matter, a faked digital shot of Julia Roberts doing
double-penetration with George Clooney and Brad Pitt. It is clear from specialist
54 Category One and Category Two designate the Office of Film and Literature Classification’s categories for legitimate pornographic print publications. 55 The popular circulation of repackaged celebrity home-made porn such as Paris Hilton’s One Night in Paris has added an additional frisson of public/private blurring in recent years. For an interesting interrogation of the crossover of the genres of ‘pornography’ and ‘the home movie’, see Hillyer, 2004.
154
websites, too, that fetishists form fan cultures with specialised sexual tastes, and as such
are avid ‘queer’ readers of popular media. For example, many BDSM websites contain
lists which faithfully cite even the faintest hints or allusions to BDSM sexuality in pop
songs, films or television shows, such as the comic spanking sequences in Ally McBeal
and Sex and the City or use of BDSM terminology in Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Others go
further than simply collating lists by editing together highlights from their personal
collections for commercial distribution, a tradition which Thomas Waugh notes has long
been popular among gay men as a form of communal appropriation. Waugh describes a
still of Alan Ladd being flogged in the 1946 film Two Years Before the Mast as 'the prize
of one S/M aficionado's collection' (1996: 57). As Laurence O’Toole describes it:
In the porn shops of North Beach, San Francisco, you can find shelves of
video compilations ... recovered from the mainstream and remade as porn.
There’s Eugene Bernard’s series of classic corporal punishment clips from
cinema and television, full of scenes of cowgirls being spanked by cowboys
and of tanned, muscular male leads being strung up and whipped in biblical
epics, on the high seas, or in the Sheriff of Nottingham’s dungeon (1998: 22).
There is also a large community of (largely) fans of mainstream media who invent and
circulate pornographic or slash ‘fanfics’ – stories which describe explicit sexual
encounters between characters in non-pornographic media, such as Captain Kirk and Mr
Spock. Then there are fans who produce their own forums to re-post professional porn
alongside gossip, debate, reviews and critiques on amateur news groups and bulletin
boards. There are also hardcopy fanzines reflecting, in typical zine style, the idiosyncratic
155
likes and dislikes of their producers. These publications, which, like the fan websites
described above, are highly personalised labours of love, often contain pirated images
from professional porn alongside original pornographic and non-pornographic texts and
images. Some are produced in a conscious attempt to represent the erotic and
cultural/political tastes and sensibilities of those who are not catered for in the
mainstream media.
While some zines circulate exclusively within particular local subcultures, the more
broadly distributed zine Betty Paginated (‘BP’) represents an interesting blend of
pornographic amateurism and professionalism. Like many amateur websites and zines,
BP contains pirated images ‘stolen’ from video freeze-frames and old pornographic
magazines. BP is an amateur zine produced by (soft-core) porn professionals Dann
Lennard, a former People magazine editor, and Helen Vnuk, a former editor of
Australian Women’s Forum. In classic zine style, BP is highly personal, containing
interviews with porn producers and professional wrestlers, diary entries by the publishers,
letters and fiction contributed by readers, and reviews of books, zines, videos and
wrestling matches. Although ‘professionally’ produced in many ways, the zine reflects
amateurism in its collection of the many loves of its producers. All issues contain a
mixture of reproduced pornographic pictures, discussions, and humorous, blokey reviews
and biographies of, and tributes to, particular pornstars (e.g. ‘I coughed my filthy trouser
yogurt heaps of times over this chick’). However, the ‘Born for Porn’ edition (No 22)
also contains erotic semi-nude pictures of Helen Vnuk, shot by Australian ‘glamour
photographer’ Bambi. As Vnuk is Dann Lennard’s lover/partner, her photographs fits
into the classic genre of the ‘naughty wife’ home-porn shot. However, the pictures are
156
professionally shot by the same photographer who takes the pictures of the featured
amateur and professional glamour models for Picture and People magazines. This
overlapping of the home-made and the professional points to some of the ways that
amateur porn echoes the debates about ordinariness and celebrity, voyeurism and
exhibitionism, professionalism and amateurism that circulate around other ‘reality’
genres such as webcams, docusoaps and gameshows.
Since even the most glossy Hollywood pornography offers (by definition) the
representation of real bodies having real (as opposed to simulated) sex, amateur
filmmakers and performers have a better chance of reproducing celebrity or stardom in
porn than they might in other genres. After all, the generic term for any pornographic
performer is ‘pornstar’, not ‘pornactor’. Paradoxically, Barcan’s interviewee ‘Keith’, a
director of amateur porn, holds the view that the audience for amateur porn has been
expanded as viewers become increasingly sophisticated and developed a desire ‘to relate’
to the performers having sex on film (Barcan 2002). In Keith’s view, amateurs are
performing their ordinariness rather than their stardom. They are trying to produce
performances that ordinary people can relate to. But, while the desire to relate to the
image may partly explain why people make porn for themselves, it does not explain why
so many people choose to swap, sell or otherwise publicly circulate the pictures and
videos they create at home56.
Porn exhibitionism
56 Barcan also quotes Keith as estimating that 70% of Internet porn is home-made, while Jon Dovey cites an estimate that approximately 25% of video porn is produced by amateurs (Barcan, 2002: 5).
157
Just as critiques of documentaries, docusoaps, chat shows and reality gameshows tend to
explicitly or implicitly pathologise the everday participants, so discussion of porn
production tends to question the motives of participants. Feminist theorists have rightly
confronted the psychoanalytic construction of the prostitute (and subsequently the
pornographic sex worker) as ‘perverse’. However, this repositioning of sex workers as a
disadvantaged economic class that can only ever be ‘exploited’ in self-exposure ignores
the various ways that women can recast themselves within seemingly limited social roles.
As I have argued elsewhere (see Albury 1997), women with active sexual desires have
been read by both psychoanalysis and feminism as ‘whores’ who are paradoxically
masculine – whether this masculinity is read psychoanalytically as identification with
men, or politically as collusion. If the cultural positions available to the heterosexual
woman are variations of virgin, wife, mother and whore, then it is clear that whore is the
only role through which a straight woman can express her desire. As Linda Williams
observes, “there is no self prior to the convergence of discursive injunctions to be
something (whore, mother, heterosexually desirable object, and so on)” (1994: 180). Yet,
within this ‘compulsory’ repetition there is the always potential for subversion of these
idealised positions. The stigmatised role of the pornographic whore cannot be ignored or
wished away, but it can be enlisted for sexual pleasure when “the taboo becomes
eroticised precisely for the transgressive site that it produces” (Butler 1993: 97). Amateur
porn images are simultaneously pictures of real people having real sex, and of men and
women not only performing gender but also performing sex according to the cultural
narratives which are constituted by and through sexualities. Just as Butler’s theory of
masquerade argues that real womanliness is a copy for which there is no original, so real
158
sexual performances reveal that there is no definitively real and authentic sexuality, or,
for that matter, a definitively real heterosexual body.
Whereas Ariel Levy sees raunch culture as a sign that women are “faking lust” (2005:
198, original emphasis), I think that the popularisation of amateur pornstardom offers a
mode of heterosexual performance which contests heteronormativity. This mode of DIY
stardom does not present an unrealistic or unachievable sexuality, but instead reveals the
ease with which sexual fantasies can be embodied and performed as both real and unreal.
Porn as drag
“It’s usually pretty easy”, says Ruth Barcan, “to distinguish amateur [porn] participants
from the professionals. That the naked body is so easily legible gives lie to the fantasy
(one of which nudists are especially fond) that nakedness erases social distinctions”
(2000: 151). Undoubtedly, professional bodies are ‘disciplined’ differently to everyday
bodies. Pornstars and strippers are sleek and gym-toned, and plastic surgery has almost
became an ‘industry standard’, particularly obvious in silicone-enhanced female
performers.57 Both male and female pubic hair is neatly trimmed or completely shaved to
allow maximum visibility. ‘Pornstar’ has become not simply a job description but a
sexual identity or persona, a form of drag, signified, particularly in female performers, by
an instantly identifiable ‘trashy’ style of hairdo (big hair), makeup (heavy eye-liner,
exaggerated dark lip-liner), manicure (square acrylic nails), clothing (lycra hotpants and
crop top, or lingerie) and footwear (the knee-high/thigh-high platform boot, or platform 57 Unlike standard 'showbusiness' celebrities, porn performers never attempt to deny or conceal the evidence of plastic surgery. Belgian porn performer (and surgery addict) Lolo Ferrari released x-rays of her breasts before and after silicone enhancement. I also recall seeing a porn film entitled Buffy's New Boobs in which the plot line revolved around the performer 'trying out' the results of her augmentation surgery.
159
sandal). This look is frequently adopted outside porn by cheersquads, girl groups and,
most notably, Pamela Anderson (who has herself appeared in both professional and
amateur porn), but usually in a diffusion of the high-end porn style. It is also a favourite
with drag queens and, I would argue, is itself a form of drag, or female masquerade, when
performed by women in porn.58
Male porn performers are also ‘sculpted’, but they costume themselves in particular ways
in order to maximise their appeal. Costume is particularly noticeable in ‘couples porn’,
where both men and women appear in stylised outfits. The men in this type of film often
resemble ‘romantic leads’ in mainstream romance or action adventure/fantasy genres.
The excessive costumes and hairstyles mark pornstar sexuality as ‘different’ to everyday
sex – not only differently choreographed, but differently costumed. The eroticised role of
the exhibitionist, the sexual show-off, the stud or slut, not part of ‘normative’
heterosexuality (although the fantasy roles can be experienced as normalised and
normalising), but as something above and beyond real sex or everyday sex. Of course,
not all producers of amateur porn choose to emulate the codes of pornstar drag – many
display an eroticism that directly challenges the codes of mainstream porn. Frequently,
however, pornstars are imitated in a form of ‘playacting’ which I believe challenges the
normative boundaries between domesticated and pornographic heterosexualities.
At the same time, the relative accessibility of the technologies that allow ‘publication’ on
the net, as well as the popularity of webcamming and blogging, has revealed that porn
consumers are eager to look at and fantasise about ‘imperfect’ bodies. As Victorian
58 The masculine versions of male pornstar personae also overlap with fetishised 'rockstar' or 'moviestar' looks. Flowing hair, rippling muscles, bulging leather pants, tattoos, body piercings, jewelry and make up the most stereotypical 'pornstar' look for men.
160
webmaster and publisher ‘Craig’ explains, it is the very ordinariness of web amateurs that
makes home-made porn so appealing:
A lot of internet webcam sites have become very popular, because people
like the factor of seeing someone who is not a paid pornstar getting their
gear off or having sex with somebody … I think it’s kind of like the next
door neighbour factor – they don’t really know who it is, but they like the
fact that it could be someone they walk past in the supermarket or someone
who lives down the street … The biggest growth in porn in the last ten years
has been in the amateur area, the other areas are pretty much maxed out
(personal communication, 2001).
Online amateur sites, and CU-SeeMe webcam groups, have opened up a realm of
‘domesticated’ pornography that is simultaneously public and private. Don Slater
found in his ethnographic research into one online collector’s site that sex-pic
traders feel themselves to be part of a virtual community, much like other special-
interest groups. Slater’s interviewees enjoy participating in a pleasurable
alternative to everyday life, especially when:
the chat [on the sex-pics site] … can itself become eroticised as
representations, flirting, heated and pleasurable sex talk, cybersex, in which
the actual encounter between participants becomes, as the typical comment
goes, ‘like being inside a piece of interactive pornography’ (Rival et al
1998: 300).
161
This desire to voluntarily immerse oneself in ‘interactive pornography’ is not exclusively
the province of male porn fans. In his study, Slater found that female informants
particularly appreciated the internet as a place where they could “explore desires which
are too taboo, embarrassing or dangerous for off-line life: mainly bisexuality,
exhibitionism, group sex and promiscuity” (Rival et al 1998: 301). This finding is
supported by participant observer study, conducted by Australian researchers Marj Kibby
and Bronwyn Costello, of a heterosexual webcam exhibitionist site which, they argue,
allows not only a space for female sexual experimentation and exhibitionism but formed
a community that supported women’s voyeuristic desire to be sexually entertained by
men, and men’s desires to perform as eroticised objects of desire (Kibby & Costello
1999, 2001).
As Kibby and Costello observe, it is easier for amateur women to perform porn than it is
for amateur male performers, since there are fewer popular signifiers of erotic display for
heterosexual men than there are for women. As they succinctly put it, “there is no sock
equivalent to the fishnet stocking” (2001: 361), and many elements of eroticised
masculine costuming (such as cock rings or uniforms) are more commonly seen as
homoerotic (although this is changing as women’s deployment of ‘the gaze’ becomes
more acceptable in popular culture). Kibby and Costello note, however, that members of
the CU-SeeMe community are critical of male participants who limit their interaction to
what is termed ‘crotch-cam’, or the close-up framing of their genitals to the exclusion of
the rest of their bodies. This is not considered by community members as ‘doing a show’,
and female community members frequently refuse to interact with such men, who are
seen as ‘selfish’ (2001: 361).
162
It is difficult, in this context, to determine whether online sex is public or private,
and whether it is real or fake. As Rival et al have observed, online sexual “pleasures
and transgressions evidently depend on a clear separation of sexuality from ‘real
life’” (1998: 304). At the same time, the separation between sex and real life is not
always clear-cut. Slater observed that “many logged conversations move within
minutes from tastes in porn to the problems of single-parenthood, money problems,
dead-end jobs” (Rival et al 1998: 304). Similarly, for Kibby and Costello, CU-
SeeMe sex chat “is often grounded in the ordinariness of everyday life as people
discuss where they’re from, their age, their marital status, their jobs, their computer
problems and the weather, all the while displaying erotic images of their naked
bodies” (2001: 364).
Clearly ‘internet porn’ does serve as a pleasurable space where sexual fantasy serves as
an escape from the everyday. At the same time, amateur porn and X-rated swap-sites
seem to demonstrate that sex (even pornographic or taboo sex) is interconnected with
everyday life. Not only are everyday domestic issues discussed on the pic trading site, the
space of the site itself is ‘domesticated’ in participants’ discussions. These may include,
for example, the formulation of guidelines for online sexual etiquette, and the negotiation
of jealousy and competition between online and real-life sex partners. As Slater and his
fellow researchers describe it, the study of this particular web community “shows that the
objectification of sexuality on-line appears to be fuelled at least as often by the urge to
order sexuality (and IRC relationships and practices themselves) along ethical lines as it
is to gratify it transgressively” (Rival et al 1998: 316). I take this to mean that these porn
fans do not view their own enjoyment of pornographic representations of sexuality as
163
dehumanising or objectifying of themselves or others. Instead, IRC sex pic trading is seen
as part of everyday sexuality – pleasurable, but not without its problems and ethical
challenges. As Slater argues, it is this acknowledgment that the world of porn and
striptease is not divorced from everyday life that make the experience ‘real’ for
participants (Slater 2002).
Even within the seemingly utopian world of interactive pornography, there are negatives.
Online porn fan communities are vocal about their enjoyment, but can be quite critical of
what they see as the sausage-factory production practices of commercial porn producers,
and the generic, poor-quality products which can sometimes result. One male porn
fan/collector complained, “I get the feeling that whenever … I watch an adult movie I’m
being sneered at behind my back and treated like a moron. I don’t appreciate it” (O’Toole
1999: 337). And if heterosexual men, who are after all porn’s target demographic, are
dissatisfied with commercial pornography, those with ‘minority’ sexual tastes have extra
incentive to create their own alternatives. As Melbourne amateur drag-king/lesbian porn
producer Bumpy puts it, “I hate the [mainstream] lesbian porn that I’ve seen … most of
it. Like it’s not sexy. To me it seems very wimpy and straight”. Given this widespread
dissatisfaction with the work of porn professionals, it not surprising that many porn fans
decide that they can do better.
The proliferation of pornographic everyday heterosexualities reveals the limitations of
theories that attempt to oppose private, everyday, domestic, unseen, ‘normal’ sexualities
with those that are public, exotic, subversive, visible, or perverse. Further, amateur porn
offers an opportunity to think about the production and consumption of pornography in
164
terms of both men’s and women’s own exhibitionism, and their desire to present
themselves as pornographic ‘spectacle’ to be applauded. Amateur pornstars are not
necessarily ‘transgressive’, yet their engagements with exhibitionism and voyeurism are
often shaped by ethical considerations that acknowledge aspects of sexuality that are
generally seen as outside heterosexuality. In addition, the production or consumption of
pornography can be a space for exploring new modes of thinking about and performing
sex and gender. In particular, pornography can become a space where the meanings of
non-normative sexual practices can be explored, and in some contexts contested. In the
following, and final, chapter, I will look at changing representations of heterosexual men,
and the ways that even quite normative media forms can be seen to challenge hegemonic
models of phallic hetero-masculinity. I will look at the ways in which the depiction of
semen (the ultimate sexual ‘waste product’) has shifted, from being exclusively
pornographic, to becoming a tool for representing the ‘shame’ of heterosexual
masculinity. I will also examine the traditionally taboo practice of male/female anal sex,
and consider some of the ways that its popularisation in pornography since the 1990s can
be seen to intersect with broader popular shifts in thinking about ‘normal’ heterosexual
practice.
165
Chapter 5
Abject Masculinities
There are many (like myself) who agree with Lynne Segal's assertion that:
Male sexuality is most certainly not a single shared experience for men. It is
not any single or simple thing at all- but the site of any number of emotions
of weakness and strength, pleasure and pain, anxiety, conflict, tension and
struggle (1990: 215).
The tendency within radical feminism to equate maleness with a particular kind of
masculinity, and a particular kind of heterosexual relation can serve to reinforce, rather
than undermine, traditional conservative notions of masculinity. Many radical feminists
seem to believe that male heterosexuality was not simply a sexual desire for women, but
a desire to control and sexually dominate women. As Susan Griffin put it “If the
professional rapist is to be separated from the average dominant heterosexual, it may be
mainly a qualitative difference” (cited in Segal 1990: 233). Important as the feminist
introduction of debates around rape as sexual violence have been, the tendency to
conflate sexual violence with 'heterosexuality' constructs heterosexual masculinity as
intrinsically and universally violent, and constructed through the sexual intimidation of
women. As Suzanne Moore puts it, “the way we regard a body of theory is much the
same as we regard real bodies. We can disavow the things we don't like, fetishise the
things we do, make do with what is familiar while fantasising about something altogether
166
different...” (1988: 45). This is most evident when discussions of eroticised male
heterosexual bodies are qualified by an insistence that these depictions are 'homo-erotic',
and deny women the pleasure of spectatorship. Futher, there has been a move within
feminism to read representations of heterosex and sexuality in advertising, in mainstream
cinema and in particularly in pornography, as literal (and transparent) images of
heteronormative male desires to shame, and therefore control, women. Sexual images are
opposed by campaigners such as Andrea Dworkin and Catherine McKinnon on the basis
that they are part of a continuum of sexual violence, in which shame and disgust are
deployed as weapons against women. That is to say depictions of women having (or
inviting) sex with men are read as 'demeaning', and femininity and feminine bodies are
read as 'dirty' or shameful, and disempowered. It is not simply the construction of men as
'looking', and women as intrinsically 'to be looked at' which is most troubling to porn's
opponents. It is the fact that the 'looking' and 'being looked at' is sexual, both in content
(pictures of people naked, or having sex), and in function. From the most 'artistic' erotic
black and white etching, to the most explicit, badly lit all-anal video; the bulk of
pornography is designed to facilitate male sexual fantasy, and enhance male
masturbation.
Before I go further, I will clarify my specific aims in this chapter, and Chapter 6. I
acknowledge that femininist and queer theorists, particularly, have argued that
masculinity cannot be seen as a monolithic structure. Even within straight and gay
identification, men (and women) can recognise and perform numerous masculinities.
Class, age, race, ethnicity, education, subcultural affiliation, social geography - all these
167
factors may come into play. For example, a tertiary educated middle class white man may
experience his masculinity quite differently to a rural immigrant labourer who never
completed high school - even if both prefer to have sex exclusively with women.
Although I will draw on contemporary masculinity studies, my focus on male sexuality in
these chapters is designed to serve other strategic purposes. Firstly, it is a reparative
engagement with what I see as paranoid tendencies within some feminisms. As I
discussed in Chapter 3 and 4, feminist critiques of misogynist themes in pornography and
other popular texts have been noted by the producers of pornography, and porn itself has
changed as a result. In some contexts these changes have been motivated by a desire for
social change, and anti-sexist politics, in others the shifts have been commercially
motivated. Popular representations of sexuality (particularly in pornography) are still
critiqued, however, as the source of bad messages about male and female sexuality. For
that reason, I have chosen to closely examine two aspects of pornography that are widely
agreed to encourage the ‘worst’ aspects of heterosexual male sexuality: cumshots, and
anal eroticism. In doing so, my discussion examines various ways that heterosexual
men’s bodies, and sexual practices have been represented within texts that target
heterosexual audiences. These representations occur in diverse forms within
pornographic texts, and in other popular cultural texts, such as Hollywood films or men’s
magazines; yet (with rare exceptions) feminist theorists of sexuality representation have
often overlooked their specificities. By attending to these specificities, I do not seek to
‘undo’ heterosexual masculinity, or even to challenge the erotics of heterosexual men’s
and women’s investments in ideologies of sex and gender. Rather, my aim is to
168
demonstrate the instabilities and inconsistencies that are already present within these
popular discourses, in order to illustrate their potentials for thinking about ethical
heterosexualities. It is these erotically charged instabilities that create potential spaces for
ethical reflection, and the remaking of heterosexual identities.
As Laura Kipnis puts it, the realm of pornographic heterosexual masculinity is most
problematic for feminism when men are able to “arrogate the power and privilege of
having public fantasies about women's bodies without any risk or comparable exposure
of the male body, which is invariably produced as powerful and inviolable” (Kipnis 1999:
151). Or, as Calvin Thomas puts it, “the deployment of women as objects of visual
pleasure allows the masculine subject to hide himself behind his own gaze” (1996: 80).
Yet critiques of porn which focus only on the representation of women's bodies are also
'hiding' men behind a particular theoretical gaze, which can only see heterosexuality
through a particular mode of gender opposition. Men who look at pornography see more
than women's bodies. Unlike advertising, or even most of Hollywood cinema,
heterosexual pornography is one of the few mediums specifically aimed at hetero men in
which male bodies are fully exposed. Pornography allows a prolonged, sexualised
scrutiny of other men - particularly their erect or semi erect penises (Kipnis 1999: 131).
Both male and female genitals are depicted in close-up 'plumbing shots', and the male
bodies that appear in mainstream porn often conform to fetishised models of masculinity
which would be considered 'homoerotic' in other contexts. The average male porn star in
mainstream heterosexual US made porn is every bit as tanned, toned, waxed, coiffed and
buffed as his female counterpart - right down to his neatly groomed or shaven pubic hair.
169
Even outside of pornography, straight men's bodies are far more subject to scrutiny than
classic critiques of media imagery will allow. A close examination of 'men's' media
genres, from glossy magazines to gross-out teen movies reveals a more complex, anxious
picture, in which men's bodies are frequently 'exposed' and made vulnerable. Often this
vulnerability is explicitly linked to male sexuality, and heterosexual men's desire for
women. As Catharine Lumby (1997a) argues, more 'upmarket' men's magazines such as
Men's Health, Esquire and Details often represent male heterosexual pleasure not as
phallic mastery, but as “awfully hard work”, requiring “devotion, commitment and
sacrifice” on the part of men (Lumby 1997a: 7). While the traditional Playboy style
magazine of the '50s, '60s and '70s59 may have represented and presumed a (no doubt
tenuous) unified hetero male identity, post 1980's men's magazines present “the
overriding message ...that masculinity has entered an age of profound uncertainty”
(1997a: 8). And, as Carol Siegal (2000) observes, contemporary Hollywood films such as
Jerry Maguire and Chasing Amy present pictures of troubled or ambivalent hetero
masculinity. Jerry Maguire is “the most submissive person in the film” (2000: 106), the
protagonist is Chasing Amy is desperately attracted to, yet threatened and confused by,
the aggressively pansexual Amy. Extending Lynne Segal's (1994) observations
(following Hollway) that both heterosexual men and women seek sexual surrender and
passivity, Siegal argues that feminist theorists of heterosexuality have underestimated (or 59 In The Hearts of Men, Barbara Ehrenreich (1983) suggests that Playboy's discursive construction of the 'swinging bachelor' who resists the financial and emotional drain of marriage and childrearing is itself a reflection of masculine sexual anxieties. Steven Cohan's 1993 reading of images of masculinity and femininity in the 1955 film Picnic also points to the proliferation of popular cultural debates around masculine sexual fatigue and uncertainty in post WWII America. Both Cohan and Ehrenreich argue that these concerns over male 'fatigue' and anxiety were fuelled in part by the Kinsey Report's revelations of the prevalence of male sexual dysfunction.
170
underacknowledged) the extent to which heterosexual masculinity is played out in both
public and private arenas as a 'masochistic' desire to be controlled or dominated by
sexually aggressive (as opposed to simply assertive) women (2000: 11).
In this context, both looking and being looked at sexually can be understood as potential
sources of excitement and anxiety for heterosexual men. In this chapter, I am not simply
concerned with presenting evidence of 'table-turning' or role-reversal. Nor do I seek to
argue that popular media images represent either 'transgressive' or 'hegemonic' images of
hetero masculinity. Instead, I am interested in the most explicit images of hetero sex and
male pleasure - images of aroused men, with erect and ejaculating penises. While these
images have been available to heterosexual men in straight porn for many years, they
have only been made freely available to 'mixed' audiences in the last ten or so years.
The representation of naked men, particularly naked, aroused or orgasmic men troubles
the notion that men are never voyeuristic objects. As I will argue, the popular media
scandal that surrounded the publication of a nude photograph of footballer Andrew
Ettinghausen reflected the ways in which theories of representation which insist that to be
looked at is to be 'feminised', reflected some of the limitations of 'gendered' thinking
about looking and being looked at sexually. For example, while Julia Kristeva's
theorisation of abjection is extremely useful for unpacking some of the mixed shame,
disgust and excitement that 'loads' sexual (particularly pornographic) imagery, Kristeva's
work is based in a psychoanalytic model of gender difference, which is centred on female
castration and lack.
171
Abjection makes an extremely useful tool for exploring alternatives to the argument that
pornographic images are always images of demeaned and degraded female bodies. In
fact, images of ejaculating penises (and of semen itself) can be read in multiple ways -
one of which views them as evidence of male shame. But while I will explore images of
ejaculation in pornography and mainstream cinema, my aim is not to simply 'shift' shame
and ambivalence from abject femininity to abject masculinity. Rather, I seek to explore
the ways in which shame constitutes a visceral part of sexual experience, rather than
simply an attachment to particular kinds of gendered representation. It is not enough to
propose that images of heterosex represent the opposition of 'male sexual pride' to 'female
sexual shame', nor that the antidote to hegemonic heteronormative masculinity is to
enforce female sexual pride, by reinforcing male sexual shame. By moving away from
psychoanalytic models, to draw on Sylvan Tomkins theories of affect, I hope to open up
some ground to re-read images of embodied male sexualities.
Naked masculinity
Much of the feminist opposition to pornography defines heterosexual porn itself as an
objectifying representation of women, and a male projection of an idealised femininity.
But images of naked men, in and out of pornography, present an image of masculinity
that is not at all straightforward. For example, even a flaccid penis is considered
practically 'unrepresentable' in popular culture and media (outside of pornography).
When Australian HQ magazine published a naked change-room photograph of Rugby
172
League footballer Andrew Ettinghausen, the publishers ACP were forced to pay
Ettinghausen $350 000 in damages on the basis that the photo “showed his penis and held
him up to public ridicule and contempt” (cited in Buchbinder 1994: 77). As David
Buchbinder argues, there can be no doubt that the publication of a naked photograph
caused Ettinghausen (known as ET) a great deal of understandable embarrassment. But
why should the publishers be prosecuted under defamation laws? Clearly, the
implication that ET had approved the release of the photo (he had not) opened him up to
ridicule by his peers. And, as one report put it, “it was humiliating to be asked by young
women to sign the photograph in the magazine” (1994: 77). Buchbinder argues that the
publication of ET's photo was considered defamatory for a variety of reasons: it revealed
his penis to be simply a penis - rather than a phallus, it opened him up to comparisons on
the basis of his penis size, and it made ET's body 'the eroticised object of the gaze' -
implicitly feminising him. Thomas, following Lacan, argues that “visibility [of the penis]
not only shames the phallus, it transforms it into its opposite, alienates it from ‘itself’”
(1996: 51).60
While I do not dispute these hypotheses, I argue that Buchbinder, like many theorists who
draw on particular politicised models of sex and gender, has perhaps disavowed the
extent to which even the most masculine male bodies are eroticised objects in
contemporary pop culture. Theoretical insistence on the unified 'phallic masculinity' that
is only undermined via the feminising force of sexualised representation disavows the
ambivalence and instability that exists even within the most 'secure' masculine personae.
60 Thomas cites Lacan's note on the Latin derivation of the term pudenda: the verb 'pudere', to be ashamed (1996: 50).
173
For example, media coverage of professional football leaves the viewer in no doubt that
these men’s bodies are their fortune. The fact that Ettinghausen's penis was visible in the
HQ image may have added an extra frisson for his female fans - leaving aside the
arguments that insist that heterosexual women do not find photographs of men's penises
attractive or erotic (such as those advanced by Jeffreys 1990 and Coward 1984).
However, even prior to the publication of the explicit photograph, handsome, blonde
Andrew Ettinghausen had already been widely promoted by the Cronulla Sharks,
Channel Nine, and the Australian Rugby League as an object to be gazed upon by both
male and female fans.
To insist that to shame Ettinghausen is to 'feminise' him is certainly in keeping with
feminist (and psychoanalytic) understandings of gender difference in which femininity is
identified with 'the body', as masculinity is distanced from it. Within this strict division,
(feminine) bodies are deemed to be lower, and more shameful, yet at the same time, more
available to be looked at and evaluated by judging (masculine) subjects. Yet both men
and women have bodies, and experience a range of emotions (or affects) associated with
them. Shame, pride, disgust, excitement, fear and surprise may all be experienced in
relation to the body, particularly the sexualised body. Feminist theorists have rightly
noted the tendency for heterosexual men to disavow their own embodied ambivalence,
displacing it into an intense overinvestment in female bodies as the ultimate repositories
of both shame and excitement. Certainly (as I will discuss) Julia Kristeva's work on
abjection points to some of the ways in which representations of penises and ejaculations
can both emphasise and efface male bodily anxieties. Yet Kristeva's adherence to a
174
psychoanalytic model also ensures that bodily affects such as shame and disgust are to be
'housed' primarily in feminine bodies, and that, as a consequence, any understanding of
bodies that are 'shameful' or 'disgusting' must be understood in terms of oedipal gender
binaries. It is these divisions, I argue, that limit discussions of the complex and multi-
genred media of heterosexual pornography.
Objectified masculinities
Theories of the 'objectifying male-gaze' (see Berger 1972, Mulvey 1975) insist that men
'do', and women 'are'. Photographic and filmic images of women, such theories argue,
represent woman as passive 'objects' to be gazed upon, rather than subjects with their own
agency. By contrast, male celebrities (Mulvey specifically refers to Hollywood movie
stars, but the theory might also be applied to celebrity sportsmen) are constructed as
desirable not as eroticised objects to be looked at, but as images of “the more perfect,
more complete, more powerful ideal ego” (Mulvey 1989: 20). However, as Steven Cohan
argues, male film stars have in fact been promoted not simply as paragons of idealised
masculine power, but as beautiful, sexualised men. As Cohan puts it:
Whether promoting Douglas Fairbanks Snr. and Rudolph Valentino or Robert
Redford and Mel Gibson, the Hollywood studios have made it their business
to sell the imagery of male stars as part of the film product, holding out to the
spectator, male or female, the pleasure of looking at men (1993: 204).
Just as Mel Gibson's hyper-masculine 'action hero' status is not diminished by the erotic
175
attention paid to scenes where he appears naked, or bares his buttocks on film; the fact
that Ettinghausen and other 'glamorous' sportsmen 'do' sport does not prevent them from
being objectified as beautiful, highly produced and managed commodified bodies in
newspaper articles, on television programs, or in photographs. The fact that young
women asked ET to autograph his naked image suggests that he had already been
produced in some way as an object of desire. Ettinghausen's particularly eroticised status
is emphasised by comparison to the two other naked footballers that were photographed
with him. Neither was sufficiently defamed (or explicitly eroticised) to join the suit
against ACP, nor were they mentioned by name in Buchbinder's academic consideration
of the incident.
While almost any representation of a woman can be understood as ‘objectifying’,
heterosexual males are only recognised as having been objectified (in a pejorative sense)
when they are full frontal. Sexualised full-frontal shots of heterosexual men are never
simply feminising, or homoerotic. They reveal that masculinity involves vulnerability
even where it is theoretically held to be most invulnerable. If the visible, sexualised penis
confronts and unravels the 'power' of the hidden, symbolic phallus, it does so not only
because the naked hetero man is objectified and therefore feminised by the exposure, but
because heterosexual masculinity is already permeated by the spectre of erotic need,
anxiety, failure and shame rather than a universal ‘power over’. If the emperor of 'phallic
mastery' literally has no clothes, it is only obvious to us when we look right at his penis...
or worse. The dominant construction of gender certainly constructs femininity as abject—
but it does not necessarily follow that all that is abject is inherently feminine. I argue that
176
masculinity is not 'made' abject when a man assumes a feminised identity as a cross
dresser or a naked pin-up, it already contains an inherent abjection. I refer to the abjection
of the male body that performs the most 'masculine' of bodily functions - ejaculation.61
Dirty Semen, Dirty Men...
Andrea Dworkin asserts that semen is a 'totem' of male power, and argues that hetero
men believe that while the act of ejaculation 'ennobles' men, it makes women dirty
(1997:164). For Dworkin, then, the pornographic image of ejaculation in the 'money' or
cumshot has a straightforward, transparent meaning. When “... semen is spread all over a
woman's face, a man or men ejaculate all over her body; ... to ejaculate is to pollute the
woman” (1997: 187).
I agree that unless a woman has a very intense semen fetish, she probably wouldn't
consider ejaculation on her body as anything even close to a peak of sexual stimulus. It is
quite important, though, to explore the logic that underlies this 'commonsense' concept of
ejaculation as pollution. In the much-quoted words of anthropologist Mary Douglas, “dirt
is matter out of place” (1969). If semen 'belongs' to men to the extent that it ennobles
them, it must, then, be out of place on women. If male sexual pleasure produces a
polluting substance, then sex with men pollutes women, therefore any depiction of
61As Shannon Bell (1991) notes, ejaculation is not an exclusively male sexual function. Bell argues that not only have modern male sexologists invested in an economy of ejaculation where the privilege of 'spending' and 'withholding' ejaculate is denied to women (160), but feminists who have invested theoretically in the politics of sex/gender 'difference' have difficulty recognising the potentially destabilising 'sameness' of male and female ejaculation.
177
heterosexual desire and pleasure is 'demeaning'. As British feminist Avedon Carol
observes, feminists can create very specific charmed circles around 'appropriate'
heterosexual practices. For example, “while we may be allowed to enjoy cunnilingus, it is
often perceived as ‘degrading’ for women to perform fellatio” (1993: 152) Those
feminists who (unlike Dworkin) approve of heterosexual activities per se, but disapprove
of their representation in pornography must then take pains to point out that they are not
opposed to nudity, or sex itself, but to particular, pornographic images. It is unsurprising
then that the cumshot is singled out as a particularly offensive marker of all that is bad
about 'pornographic' heterosex. For example sociologists Robert Jensen and Gail Dines
assert that the everyday physical act of ejaculation itself is not, in their view, demeaning,
but:
…in pornography, ejaculating onto a woman is a primary method by
which she is turned into a slut, something (not really someone) whose
primary, if not only purpose is to be sexual with men (1998: 79).
The Money shot
Read in Linda Williams' terms as 'the frenzy of the visible', the cumshot provides proof of
the pleasure, and 'realness' of on-screen pornographic sex (1989). Although female porn
actors thrash and groan, there's no actual proof that they've really had an orgasm (unless
they ejaculate - which can be faked with the assistance of douches). Williams argues that
the cumshot must be made visible to stand for proof of both the male and female
178
orgasms. Additionally, it provides a handy cue for the masturbator at home, letting
him/her know that the scene has peaked. Williams notes that the actress being cum on
(back, stomach during fucking scenes, breasts and face for blow jobs) generally behaves
as if having semen on her body is more exciting and pleasurable than having a penis
inside her (or any other kind of sexual stimulation, for that matter). After the money shot,
the porn actress is generally presumed to be satisfied. There's no going back to
cunnilingus, or other sex acts. The cumshot, then, provides porn with the narrative
equivalent of 'they all lived happily ever after'.
Within the pornography industry, cum or money shots are highly valued...yet this is not
necessarily a 'compulsory' aspect of the visual representation of sex. Early 'stag' cinema
does not seem to have especially eroticised cum shots, although withdrawal prior to
ejaculation is hardly a recent contraceptive technology. For porn actress Brandy
Alexandre, the cumshot is an erotic fashion, which represents contemporary taboo and
fetishised pleasure:
You've got to have the come shot, [because] you've got to have the heat. And
this, at present, is where the heat is. Once it was a glimpse of ankle, maybe
some cleavage, some thigh. Then they got naked in time, and they fucked, and
they showed them penetrating. But they also want to show pleasure, and
internal come shots aren't so pleasant or pleasurable, but [external] come shots
are deemed to be so. I don't have a problem with them...but I expect in time
they will become old news (in O'Toole, 1998: 73).
179
In his 1998 study Pornocopia: porn, sex, technology and desire, Laurence O'Toole
reports that the success of Candida Royalle's Femme series of 'couples videos' (which do
not include cumshots) has launched a lively debate within the US porn industry as to
whether they are necessary at all. For example, producer David Kastens speculates that
his production house Vivid “might go more internal come shots [sic] and seek to show
the intensity of feeling and emotional release” (1998: 343). In response to his
interviewees, O’Toole expresses concern that without the 'closure' of the cumshot, 'real'
porn may drift towards euphemistic 'soft core':
Though potentially still erotic, such euphemistic sex is clearly unable to
offer a representation of 'real' sex, in the sense not only of contact but also
of arousal and release. In hard core the viewers can witness bodies that are
'moved' as well as beautiful (1998: 344).
The paradox of pornography is that even though the sex is 'real', most representations of
real sex on film are highly staged and choreographed. Not only are the scenarios often
clearly contrived fantasies, the performers themselves do not always look like they're
enjoying their work. Most female porn actors appear to be faking orgasm most of the
time, and although most male performers ejaculate, very few show any evidence of an
'intensity of feeling and emotional release'. (There are notable exceptions in both
categories). It is precisely the profusion of body fluids, the 'messiness' of semen and
sweat, which provides O'Toole (and other porn viewers) with the satisfying illusion of
180
'real' sex. Certainly it is this pleasure in messiness and body fluids that Kipnis (1999)
identifies as a major factor of porn's appeal.
Abject Fluids
The generic hetero porn cum shot is easy to 'read'. Typically we see a man penetrating a
woman vaginally, anally or orally, and then pulling out to masturbate to ejaculation on
her back, buttocks, belly, breasts, or face. This style of porn typically contains plenty of
explicit plumbing shots, and a clear shot of semen squirting out of the penis. Until the
mid to late 1990s, this was the only mainstream cinematic image of ejaculation. Yet in
the late 1990s's, Hollywood films such as American Pie, Happiness and There's
Something About Mary began to depict semen on screen. For Anne Marlow, columnist
for the online magazine Salon, these images of semen were a sign of the erosion of hetero
masculinity in the face of advances in women's rights to control reproduction. Hollywood
cumshots, she argued, “only prove how passé men have become”:
What's depressing about this plethora of white goo on screen ... is the
desperate need to insist on its importance. As semen becomes less and less
essential to reproduction, we brandish it even more defiantly
(www.salon.com/health/sex/1999/04/24/moneyshot/index.html).
It seems to me, though, that these onscreen ejaculations have very little to do with
reproduction, or whether or not men are defiant or passé; but quite a lot to do with the
181
instability of the boundaries around gender categories. The cumshots in American Pie,
Happiness, and There's Something About Mary are visible results of solitary
masturbation, or of fellatio that ends in masturbation. None of these acts are remotely
linked to reproductive potential, yet all reveal uneasy and ambivalent male relationships
to sexual shame and sexual pleasure. One might argue that Hollywood cumshots became
‘fashionable’ following the Clinton/Lewinsky scandal, as it became possible to publicly
make fun of semen and ejaculation - after the President’s penis and semen had been
discussed on the nightly news, it would have been difficult for studio executives and
classifiers to argue that these topics were unacceptable according to US 'community
standards'. This does not, however, answer the question of why ejaculation is funny in
There's Something About Mary, or horrific in Happiness.
Abject semen
Kristeva’s concept of ‘the abject’ offers a few clues as to the source of the humour, and
the horror. According to Kristeva (1982), almost all body fluids: blood, urine, sweat,
faeces, breast milk and vaginal lubrication, provoke a horrified reaction. Seeing,
experiencing or contacting these fluids cause a corporeal reaction, a nauseated reflex to
expel the contaminating substance. But it is important to remember that abject fluids
provoke disgust and horror not because they are foreign or invading substances, but
because they are part of us, products of our own bodies. In the realm of the abject, the
boundaries between subject and object are dissolved. Neither self nor other, the abject
blurs our body's 'clean and proper' boundaries, provoking simultaneous transgressive
182
fascination and repulsion.
Abjection occurs in reaction to a loathsome object “an item of food, a piece of filth, waste
or dung” (1982: 2). In abjection there is “a massive and sudden emergence of
uncanniness” (1982: 2), in which something (someone) that seemed familiar becomes
strange, “radically separate”, and horrific (1982: 2). In Kristeva's terms, abjection is more
than uncanniness - it provokes a violent reaction - a retching, rather than a shivering.
There is shame in the nauseated reaction to that which is improper/unclean, because the
improper object is as compelling and fascinating as it is loathsome. Crucially, the abject
is not fully an object - it is part of the self, the subject. Wastes products: shit, blood,
urine, mucous, are part of my body - however they cannot be part of me, they must be
expelled. If I allow the abject to remain with me, or if I revel in my own abjection (as in
Kristeva's example of the Christian martyr), I myself become abject: criminal, “abased”,
masochistic (1982: 5). “Thus” Kristeva puts it, “it is not lack of cleanliness or health that
causes abjection but what disturbs identity, system, order” (1982:4).
The abject is “the ‘object’ of primal repression” (original emphasis 1982: 12) in Oedipal
struggles to distinguish self from the mother as other - and consequently grounded in
psychoanalytic models of castration and lack. Joiussance, or wordless self-shattering is
associated with abjection, when “urine, blood, sperm, excrement show up” to allow the
anxious subject to refer “the horrors of the maternal bowels” away from himself,
reassuring himself, in the process, that he is not castrated (1982: 53). As in Freud's model
of the fetish, within Kristeva's model, the male subject is able to mask or deflect his own
183
horror over ‘the collapse of the border between the inside and the outside’ by
transforming 'the abject into the site of the Other’, gaining both erotic pleasure and
symbolic reassurance. In contrast, Kristeva argues, “when a woman ventures into these
regions it is usually to gratify...the desire for the abject that insures the life (that is the
sexual life) of the man whose symbolic authority she accepts” (1982: 53-4). Kristeva's
reasoning here seems to follow Freud's assertion that women always (already) know
themselves to be castrated/lacking, and therefore have no need for 'protective' perversions
and fetishes (see Freud: 1979). And, accepting this reason, it follows then that women do
not eroticise men’s bodies and bodily fluids, but rather their 'symbolic authority'. That is
to say, women accept their 'natural' position as the Other, the object and never the subject
of sexual authority, symbolic or otherwise.
Indeed, Kristeva herself seems to accept the symbolic authority of the male body when
she later contradicts her listing of semen with the other (non gender specific) body fluids:
urine, blood and excrement. In the chapter entitled 'From Filth to Defilement', she later
specifically states that two fluids, tears and semen ARE NOT polluting... and therefore
not abject. While in the case of tears it could be argued that they are clear, non-staining,
and above all, products of the eyes, a 'clean' and uncontaminating set of orifices, semen,
however, is a spanner in the works. It is wet and slimy, with a distinctive odour, and it
stains. I argue that Kristeva can only rule out semen as abject by adhering to fairly
traditional and rigid models of masculinity and femininity (as defined in the
psychoanalytic models she adheres to). Within these models, 'real' masculine men are
active subjects: 'hard' and in control, impermeable. In contrast women have messy,
184
uncontrollable bodies that dissolve, and leak fluid involuntarily. Feminine women have
messy boundaries, and are, by definition, both penetrable and polluting.
Yet Kristeva repeatedly emphasises the erotic pleasures of the abject - particularly in
association with this 'horrific' model of femininity. The abject other is associated with the
wordless dissolution of jouissance, and thus the other is an object of desire. While I do
not ascribe to the psychoanalytic model of lack, I believe it is crucial, when exploring the
potentials of this model for exploring popular images of sexuality, to remember that
fetish and perversion involve identification with feared/despised/desired objects. One of
the reasons why I find it so difficult to accept the simplistic (and admittedly clichéd)
argument that explains heterosexual men's enjoyment of pornography as a case of the
male sadistic, voyeuristic porn viewer 'demeaning' women through his objectifying gaze
is that this model relies so selectively on a part of the psychoanalytic construction of
subject/object relations.62 If one is to use theories of fetish to explain the pleasures of
looking, one cannot ignore the same theories built-in insistence on the tenuousness of the
boundaries between self and other. The exaggerated Othering that is seen to demean and
degrade the female through the 'male gaze' is not an expression of overweening
masculine strength and power, of a strong and impermeable subject position. Rather, it an
expression of the fragility of the masculine position as Subject, which is always
62 It is important to remember that the masculine subject in psychoanalysis seeks the elusive objet a, or missing phallus. As heterosexual object of desire the woman is the phallus for the man, in the hope that he will give her the phallus, in the form of a child (Freud: 1979). So, it is a very partial reading of male hetero desire which disavows this masculine 'lack'.
185
experienced as being at risk. It is this very sense of being at risk which creates the need to
enforce boundaries between the 'inner' and the 'outer', between masculine and feminine.63
Certainly, in many cases, the most heteronormative porn images (either visual or written)
serve to reinforce a particular model of masculine subjectivity at the expense of eroticised
femininity. Yet all too often pornography's critics assume that there is only ever one way
to look at, or read these pictures. It is shortsighted to imagine that even in the most
'misogynistic' images, the male spectator/reader never puts himself in the position of the
'degraded' object of desire. Very 'dirty' erotic fantasies are not easily confessed to a
partner, nor are they easily and comfortably discussed in mainstream, non-pornographic
arenas. The heterosexual 'pervert', who is aroused (for example) by the image of women
urinating and defecating is not likely to win support for the expression of his fantasies
simply because he has chosen a female object of desire. In fact, it can be argued that
'extreme' porn images of messy/dirty sex, offer the male viewer an image of comfort and
acceptance in the face of ambivalent combinations of arousal, shame and disgust. If one
is to follow the lines of thought offered by psychoanalysis, one must admit that within the
realms of fantasy, there is no fixed and finite boundary between subject and object - in
fact, fantasies are attempts to define, test, and create atmospheres of safety within
unstable spaces where boundaries are always questionable.
However, the psychoanalytic model, reliant as it is on the central Oedipal experience as
63As Butler argues, the distinction between the inner and the outer articulates “a set of fantasies, feared and desired” (1990: 134). She refers here to the desire to articulate a stable 'true' inner world, which is separate from an unstable, 'false' outer world, or an authentic, gendered self based 'within' the body, free from the impositions of public discourse (although discourse is always somehow 'internalised').
186
the bedrock of sexual/psychic development, cannot account for female sexual
engagements with perverse (non-reproductive) sexuality, since active desire is coded as
'masculine'. Thomas (following Williams) on porn argues that the 'bodily truth' of orgasm
that the cumshot seeks to capture is that of the unrepresentable female orgasm, rather
than the male orgasm. So, as Thomas puts it, “semen is feminised by virtue of being
subject to representation” (Thomas 1996: 19). So while we can't believe 'the
pornographic deceit' that women prefer to be ejaculated upon, neither can the academic
gaze allow for heterosexual male pleasure in the 'feminising' representation of ejaculate.
If semen has positive meaning for heterosexual men, it 'must' only be negative for
heterosexual women. As we know from the Clinton/Lewinsky case, semen is literally
'evidence' of loss of control. In mainstream sex advice, it is considered perfectly normal
for women to be nauseated by penises, and especially semen (witness the long running
'spit or swallow' debate). As HIV/AIDS has added a new level of suspicion or outright
revulsion towards body fluids, semen has become even more suspect, as 'a carrier of
infection'. In contraceptive advice, sex advice columns, and safe sex education slogans
like ‘Tell him if it's not on, it's not on’, there's a universal assumption that women are not
interested or aroused by semen. At best it's an inconvenience (that pesky wet spot). At
worst it's positively dirty and disgusting.
Is hetero porn 'disgusting' to anti-porn campaigners because it shows 'straights' perversely
eroticising messy, abject fluids? Or does straight porn, like mainstream hetero culture,
make women 'wear' the disavowed masculine abject, by literally wearing their semen in
the cumshot? In his book Male Matters: Masculinity, Anxiety and the Male Body on the
187
Line, Thomas suggests this possibility. He argues that women's abjection both protects
and prevents men from seeing their own - particularly during the abject act of
masturbation. The porn actress needs to 'accept' the porn actor's semen ecstatically, in
order to 'distract' the male masturbator from his solitary, messy ejaculation, and
subsequent clean-up. Since femininity is conflated with waste and abjection, the presence
of the female body in the cumshot, Thomas argues, makes sure the “object of horror”, the
semen, ends up “where it belongs” - on a woman, not a man (Thomas 1996: 22-23).
Certainly the ways in which the cumshot has been described suggest that the
photographic or cinematic representation of ejaculation is consistent with Kristeva's
location of the abject 'at the crossroads of phobia, obsession and perversion’ (1982: 45).
For Thomas, cumshots are not a sign of masculine 'power over', but a source of
reassurance to a masculinity that cannot fully be certain of itself as subject rather than
object:
The money shot functions to assuage male anxiety about the lack of value,
lack of power, and lack of masculinity that accrue to the hyperbolic act of
ejaculation at the very moment of the ejaculate's self-shattering appearance
(1996: 22).
But as Constance Penley argues in her article ‘Crackers and Whackers’, porn itself has
often proposed the male protagonist as not so much a Phallic Master but a grotesque
parody of normative masculinity, a figure of fun, slave to his ‘uncontrollable’ urges and
188
fluids. The pornographic male, she argues, is often a comic figure, controlled by his little
head, not his big one (Penley 1997). Like Penley, Kipnis (1999) draws on the layers of
meaning in pornography. Unlike Dworkin, she argues that gender is not always the cental
valuing system in the pornographic world order. In her study of Hustler magazine, she
emphasises the classed nature of pornography, where male politicians are satirised and
undermined by 'levelling' them through sexually explicit words and images. This is not
necessarily a feminising move - rather it is an insistence that even those with the greatest
cultural control and masculine authority (Presidents, congressmen, religious leaders, etc.)
have vulnerable bodies. Hustler's celebration of the comedy of “grossly erupting bodies”,
Kipnis argues, is designed to puncture to hypocrisy of “high culture and official culture,
which feels the continual need to protect itself against the debasements of the low (the
lower classes, low culture, the lower body...)” (1999: 137). The abject then is not only
gendered, but also classed. As Kipnis observes, “the lower body and its productions...shit,
farts, semen ... [are] Hustler's staple joke materials” (1999: 140).
Certainly, I agree that heteronormative masculinity is bolstered by attempts to insist that
sperm always requires the 'appropriate' receptacle of a woman's body (never, as Thomas
observes, another man's). This does not, however, lead me to argue with Dworkin that
semen ennobles men and pollutes women. The relationship of both men and women to
semen (particularly the especially visible semen produced through masturbation) is more
problematic, more ambivalent, and, at times, more pleasurable than that. As O'Toole
observes, the porn industry may be geared towards the desires of masturbating men, but it
does not always treat them well. Sex shops are not necessarily comfortable environments
189
for heterosexual men, as any woman who has walked into one and startled solitary male
shoppers can attest.
The illicit nature of much of the porn industry keeps prices high. Censorship regulations
ensure that magazines are wrapped in plastic, and shoppers must judge them by covers
that may promise more than they deliver. Some production houses mislead purchasers as
to the content of specific videos, naming stars on box covers who may not appear in the
actual films. All this points not only to contempt for wankers, but to a shame among male
porn consumers which prevents them from effectively lobbying for their rights under Fair
Trading Acts. When the porn industry does publicly address these consumers, it does not
portray solitary male masturbators as its audience. These men still evoke the spectre of
the miserable, frustrated teenage virgin or the dirty old man in a raincoat. It is the
autonomous woman 'empowered' by feminist erotica, or the (potentially reproductive)
monogamous heterosexual couple adding 'spice' to their marriage who represent the
acceptable porn consumer - even though they are surely in the minority.
Male use of pornography for masturbation is still seen to undermine his heterosexual
relationship, by eroding 'intimacy'. Use of pornography, or even frequent masturbation
accompanied by 'visual' fantasies is seen as a rejection of female partners, or as a sign of
'addictive' tendencies. Heteronormative masculinity always risks being eroded by male
masturbation, not simply enhanced by it, and even material designed to facilitate
masturbation admits this.
190
Loaded Guns and Baby Batter
It is this erosion of the boundaries of masculine subjectivity that is played on in the recent
Hollywood ejaculations, which Marlow finds so depressing. Within these films, semen is
very much a 'low' product, one that does not ennoble, but humiliates the masculine
subject. For example, in the Farrelly Brothers' hit teen 'date movie’ There’s Something
About Mary, Ben Stiller (Ted) is preparing for his long awaited dream date with the
lovely Cameron Diaz (Mary). His friend runs him through a pre-date checklist, and
discovers that Ben has omitted a crucial step: masturbation. He warns him that
masturbation is an essential prerequisite for a big date. Going out horny is 'dangerous...
like going out with a loaded gun', he warns. (Which is sound advice for girls or boys, but
I don't think it's purely a problem of 'baby-batter on the brain', as the character describes
it). So, in the next shot we see Ben vigorously wanking in the bathroom, over an insipid
page of bra ads, which might easily have been torn from a K Mart catalogue. It seems
like nothing more than a good sight gag - he doesn't have any porn, so he has to
improvise. It's a guy thing. But, as I will discuss, there may be another, more specific
reason why he uses those particularly innocuous images as 'porn'.
Ted masturbates, and we see him grimacing and pulling silly faces. Just as he's finally
coming, there's a knock at the door: it's Mary! He grabs a tissue and wipes his hands.
Nothing there. He frantically looks around the room, but can't find it anywhere. He rushes
to answer the door, and Mary, the love of his life, greets him by reaching up and scooping
a glutinous glob of cinematic semen off his ear. She then runs her 'polluted' hand through
191
her hair, grateful for the 'hair gel'. The cinema audience, guffawing throughout the
sequence collapses. Obviously, this comedy sequence depicts masturbation and
ejaculation, but it's not quite a cumshot. As with the ejaculation into the glass of beer in
American Pie, we only see the cum itself as an 'inert' substance, not in motion.
This masturbation scene mirrors an equally abject sequence earlier in the film, in which
Ben's first date with Mary has been disastrously aborted when he looks innocently
through a bathroom window, only to accidentally catch sight of Mary changing into her
prom dress. Mary and her mother 'catch' him looking, and in a great twist on the Porkys
teen gross-out genre, Ted is accused of peeping at and masturbating over Mary, even
though this was not his intention. He zips up hurriedly, catching his genitals in his fly. A
long comic-horror/humiliation sequence follows, which ends with Ted being carted away
in an ambulance, while Mary's intellectually disabled brother Warren joyously shouts “he
was masturbating, he was masturbating!” to the crowd which has gathered outside the
front door. When Ted finally is shown masturbating, it's crucial that he does not jerk off
over Mary. After 15 years of pining for his dream lover, are we really supposed to believe
he can't come up with a decent pre-date masturbation fantasy? Surely he has a better
imagination than that! I suggest there might be several possible reasons why we see that
bra ad:
a) the filmmakers are making a good joke about male sexuality and 'the frenzy
of the visible' e.g 'women like to fantasise, but men need to look'.
192
b) the Farrelly brothers know they are treading a fine line classification wise,
and are wisely not actually showing an explicit 'sex fantasy' sequence in a
teen movie, or
c) The reason that is most likely in my reckoning: they're showing us that
Ben is a nice guy who respects Mary, and doesn't ‘objectify’ her by jerking
off over her body, even metaphorically. This proves he is good enough for
her.
Imagine the alternatives to the bra-ad joke. If we, the audience saw a cutaway image of
some kind of Ted and Mary having some kind of idealised yet comical 'fantasy' sex, the
scene would be more 'realistic'. However, a literal representation of Ted's masturbatory
fantasy would take the film dangerously close to pornography, threatening Ted's Mr Nice
Guy Protagonist status. (Despite the fact that we might logically assume that an 'ideal'
heterosexual dream girl like Mary actually does desire and enjoy sex with her
boyfriends). Ted's wank and ejaculation is presented not as pornography, but as grotesque
physical comedy. It's not eroticised, nor is it presented as a source of male pride or
'ennoblement'. We know that he doesn't want Mary to know that he has masturbated, let
alone wipe 'the evidence' through her hair. Yet we can still laugh with Stiller's character,
despite his humiliation.64
64 Bodies out of control are of course a staple of comedy. Steven Shaviro's work on Jerry Lewis' 'comedies of abjection' argues that the constant humiliation of Lewis' characters represent his male body as constantly disintegrating. Lewis' subjectivity, Shaviro argues, is masochistic, constantly failing in the face of external authority. The audience both identifies with Lewis' confusion and misadventure, and is disgusted and embarrassed for him and by him (1993).
193
In a similar Hollywood ‘teen movie’ cumshot, a character in American Pie demonstrates
his true love for his girlfriend by ejaculating not in her mouth or onto her, but into a glass
of beer by the side of the bed.65 Later, his boorish friend drinks the ‘loaded’ beer, and not
only instantly recognises that he has drunk semen, but becomes violently ill. The physical
horror of the friend's reaction demonstrates not only the abjection of sperm as a ‘waste
product’, but a horror of the act of ‘homosexuality’ in swallowing another man’s cum66.
Clearly, in this case semen has the potential to pollute not only women, but men. But the
most abject non-pornographic visions of ejaculation occur not in teen movies, but in US
director Todd Solondz' extremely complex (and much less popular) adult film Happiness.
In Happiness we see a furtive 'pillar of the community' psychologist pedophile,
masturbating in a carpark over a pre-teen fanzine, as a mother loads her children into the
neighbouring car. We see his overweight 'lonely guy' client, masturbating over obscene
phone calls, and unable to respond to the opportunity to fulfill his fantasies. And we see
the pedophile's eleven-year-old son masturbating on his grandmother's balcony during a
family meal. This film has been described as a 'horror film', but the horrific acts of rape,
murder and mutilation take place largely off-screen. There's no graphic nudity, either. In
fact, the most gruesome things we actually see are two incredibly abject cumshots, which
(in true 'horror' tradition) were both met with audible groans by my fellow filmgoers.
65Although Vanity Fair writer Scott Turow (1999) considers both American Pie and Mary to be evidence of a Hollywood open season on that cinematic holy of holies, the penis, we actually don't get see an actual penis in any of these films - only the object of horror it produces. 66 Christopher Looby (1995) notes that there is a literary and medical tradition of both homoerotic and homophobic discussions of 'the odour of male solitude': the horrific olfactory recognition of another man's semen.
194
In the first scene, the obscene phone caller's semen hits the wall, and he uses it as 'glue' to
stick up a postcard (groans of horror). Then, in the film's final sequence, the ten-year-old
son of the horrific nice-guy suburban dad paedophile finally achieves his goal: he cums.
Having discussed his fear and inadequacy over his inability to ejaculate in several scenes,
he 'peeps' at a siliconed sunbather from on his grandmother's balcony and masturbates, as
his family sits down to lunch in the next room. We see his semen hit the railing of the
balcony, where it is promptly licked up by the family dog (more groans), who then goes
inside and exchanges 'kisses' the boy's mother (absolute incestual horror to end all
horrors). Although the obscene phone caller in Happiness has the fantasy of fucking his
callee until he 'cums out her ears', when she expresses an interest in taking up his offer,
he's absolutely paralysed and unable to act. The anxious flip-side of the cumshot is laid
bare: wankers are losers. It is men, not women, who are shamed by masturbation.
Wankers Are Losers
Although Dworkin argues that the cumshot is designed to teach women to eroticise their
'violation', it seems strange to suggest that the marker of such a 'male-centred' genre is
there solely to instruct women. Given that the vast majority of pornography is made by
heterosexual men for heterosexual men, it is impossible to imagine that the cumshots are
not a significant source of masculine heteroerotic pleasure. Since most pornography is
designed to facilitate and enhance hetero men’s experience of masturbation, then I tend to
agree with Calvin Tomas' argument that the cumshot is there for the solitary masturbator,
who must see his own semen, and can only imagine the 'body' that might receive it. In
195
most porn films (there are a few exceptions, particularly in the newer, Gonzo/amateur
films) 'the camera cuts away' before we see the towels or tissues brought into frame for
the clean up. The image is frozen at the moment of pleasure, before it becomes re-coded
as a shameful or disgusting waste product. The porn cumshot serves (at least in part) to
reassure the solo masturbator that cumming on the outside is not only acceptable, it's
infinitely more erotic than any other form of ejaculation-even when an excited, willing
partner is available.
The question arises then as to whether the ‘real’ meaning of the cumshots can be
objectively defined. Clearly, semen itself has multiple meanings, in various contexts. It
is, at once, evidence of pleasure, ‘baby-batter’, messy waste material, potential biological
hazard and ‘neutral’ by-product of orgasm. While gay men are encouraged to jerk off
together as an erotic form of safer sex, straight women are encouraged to believe that
semen is messy or 'demeaning', and that women who enjoy its tactile qualities are either
brainwashed (in Dworkin's terms) or 'sluts'. I certainly don't think that anti-porn
campaigners are trying to bolster up the now very tired idea that heterosexual vaginal
penetration is the only 'real' sex; in fact, one of their critiques of porn is that it re-enforces
stereotypes of heteronormative sexuality. However, the idea that cumshots are demeaning
seems to insist that semen belongs properly in a body, not on a body. As both Thomas
and O’Toole point out, men are used to cumming on themselves while masturbating, and
don't tend to consider the experience to be either ennobling or demeaning, although it
may be shameful, or messy. This doesn't mean, however, that they are 'proud' of
masturbating to ejaculation. At this point, it is worth considering whether an insistence on
196
defining semen as either disgusting or ennobling is futile. Perhaps a better question (in
terms of an ethical project) might be “why do we need to determine or fix a universal
meaning for bodily fluids at all?”
Andrea Dworkin’s construction of the cumshot seems to claim that, as Kipnis puts it
“men prefer that semen be seen as disgusting because the only way they can get sexual
pleasure is through violation” (1999: 147). At the same time, by arguing that semen is a
source of ‘pollution’, Dworkin seems to be insisting that “any shame [for women] is
transferred to those who evoke disgust” - that is, men (Probyn 2000: 129). If, as Judith
Butler argues, abjection is “the mode by which Others become shit”, then Dworkin's
response to the ‘othering’ of the cumshot is understandable (Butler 1990: 134). Her
reasoning seems to be as follows: masculinity is coded in relation to a feminine other.
When feminine sexualities have been normatively represented as slimy, excremental and
disgusting and women have been ashamed of their sexual bodies, it ‘makes sense’ to shift
the shame back to the men, by claiming it is male sexuality that is disgusting and Other.
Citing Silvan Tomkins' work on affect, Probyn proposes that “disgust has evolved to
protect the human being from coming too close” (Probyn 2000: 15), while “shame, on the
other hand, is in part a recognition of having been too close, where proximity to the other
has been terminated” (Probyn 2000: 131). Certainly, outside of pornography, semen is
almost universally viewed as a disgusting waste product. The thought of finding (not to
mention touching) a used condom, for example, provokes a shudder of horror, a feeling
of very definitely ‘coming too close’.
197
Ejaculation is linked with the male experience of orgasm, but it does not necessarily
follow that heterosexual male pleasure depends upon the degradation of heterosexual
women. Nor does it follow that the experience or substance of ejaculation must be
experienced by men as either a proud erotic triumph or a shameful and/or disgusting loss
of self-control. As Probyn (2000) argues, shame, disgust, guilt and pride can coexist
within a 'single' subject's corporeal sense of self. In her discussion of projects of identity
politics (such as feminism) which have sought to replace what they see as “damaging
forms of representation” such as commercial pornography with “representations of the
right sort” (i.e. woman centred erotica), Probyn questions whether disgust and shame can
ever by fully “stripped away” and replaced by pride (2000: 125). If such a project could
be successful in the case of pornography, what would be the future utility of a sexual
politics based on pride alone? For, as Probyn suggests, disgust and shame may be “the
hidden face of body pride” (2000: 128). As Thomas points, even feminist politics of body
pride persistently gender “the devalued as feminine”, and deny “the value of
powerlessness in both men and women”, insisting that there is never any source of
subjective agency for the ‘object’ of erotic desire and sexual abandon (1996: 23).
A queerer reading of the abject masculinities depicted in cumshots takes account of the
instability of sex/gender identities, and the layering of shame, pride, arousal and disgust
within even the most 'acceptable' sexual identities. If semen is simultaneously coded as
pleasurable and disgusting, it does not necessarily mean that this must always be at
women's expense - although it often is. By unpacking some of the complexities of images
of ejaculation, I have sought to question the normative understandings of sexualised
198
masculinity and femininity. Tomkins' theories of affect are exciting precisely because
they allow for open, complex readings of the intersections between cultural products and
personal, political, emotional reactions (see Probyn 2005, Bollen and McInnes 2004).
Affects are responses to stimulus - but an affect is never assumed to be 'married' to a
particular subject or object. That is to say, disgust is not 'feminine', and surprise is not
'masculine'. Affects may be layered - shame, disgust and excitement interwoven- but not
as the result of 'repression' or Oedipal conflict.
As Tomkins puts it:
Whatever one is excited by, enjoys, fears, hates, is ashamed of, contemptuous
of, or is distressed by is an object of value, positive and negative. Value
hierarchies result from value conflicts wherein the same object is both loved
and hated, both exciting and shaming, both distressing and enjoyable
(Tomkins 1995: 68)
It is easy to see then, why porn, and pornographic cum shots, are so highly charged: with
erotic value for porn's viewers, with negative value for porn's critics. Thinking around
porn with the help of Tomkins' theory, it is possible to argue that 'disgusting' (messy,
abject, visceral) heterosexual porn does not simply serve to straightforwardly mask the
threat of male sexual shame (and bolster male pride) by displacing shame onto women,
and making them objects of contempt.
199
For Tomkins, the shame response is directly connected to our experiences of looking, and
being looked at. His 'primal' example of shaming experience is that of the shy child, who
is first an embarrassment to his parents because he will not meet the gaze of a stranger.
Then, having overcome his shyness, the curious child stares inappropriately at the
newcomer, and his bold shyness embarrasses his parents again. The child is first shamed
by his parents for not looking, and then for looking too blatantly, and intently. Future
experiences of shame, Tomkins argues, are linked to this same tension of fearing to look,
then wanting to look, and be looked at. Shame creates a barrier to looking - it makes us
hang our heads and look away from that which is strange - and makes us feel strange
within ourselves (Tomkins 1995: 146-47).
Fantasies and representations of dirty sex with dirty women do not leave men 'clean' and
shame-free - they are opportunities for men to attempt to create different experiences of
their own feelings of sexual shame and self-disgust. Whenever one looks at another with
desire and expectation, there is the risk of being ignored, dismissed, or looked at with
contempt - of feeling oneself to be disgusting (Tomkins 1995: 144). As Tomkins puts it
“Unless there has been interest in, or enjoyment of the other person, or the anticipation of
such positive feeling about the other, contempt from the other may activate surprise or
distress, or fear or anger, rather than shame” (1995: 138). While Tomkins states that “for
some, the flaunting of shame leads to an exaggerated shamelessness in sexuality as
evidence to the self and others that one is proof against such affect”, he then refers to
those who “flaunt” shame as “the daredevils of shame” (1995: 102). A daredevil does not
deny shame - he tests its boundaries. Masturbation with 'abject' fantasy material could be
200
seen as a safe way to experience the 'extreme games' of sexual shame, without risking the
contempt or rejection of the object of one's desire. This is not to say, however, that
masturbation is necessarily more, or less shameful than partnered sex -the inherent shame
of both activities can manifest itself in the ways one looks - or crucially is looked at. The
male masturbator, caught 'looking' with need and desire, is widely held up as figure of
contempt and disgust.
The contingency of masculinity
There is, in feminist theoretical writing, a general resentment towards what Lynne Segal
has termed the ‘steely inevitability’ of male pleasure (1989). As we saw in the previous
chapter, porn's critics (and even its defenders) argue that porn fraudulently depicts an
exaggerated passive receptive femininity, which is matched by an aggressive, invasive
masculinity - that is, women as perpetually wet, and men as perpetually hard. In contrast
Kipnis (1996) argues that despite exaggerating and fetishising certain obvious sex and
gender differences, pornography simultaneously de-genders women and men by
representing them has having very similar kinds of erotic responses. For example
traditional gender myths tell us that men want quickies, but women want cuddles. Or that
men cum too fast, and women take all night. Or men can only have one orgasm a night,
while women can keep on keepin'on. In contrast, heterosexual porn tells us both men and
women are very interested in sex, are quickly aroused, highly orgasmic, and incredibly
interested in interested in fetish outfits and scenarios. Likewise, both show great sexual
responsiveness, recover rapidly, and are always ready for repeat performances.
201
And, as theorist Berkeley Kaite argues, there is tremendous slippage of gender roles in
pornographic scenarios: particularly when we look closely at the poses and costumes.
Even conventionally 'sexy' clothing such as rubber, leather, silk or high heels can be
difficult to read as purely masculine or feminine. Kaite suggests that the female
pornographic star is not just an 'object' to be demeaned - she almost always looks at the
man (or the camera) who looks at her. Every individual in heterosexual porn “must carry
marks of his and her desire” (Kaite 1995: 102, emphasis added). Despite (or perhaps
because of) this blurring of gender, porn is widely read as the most male of all 'male'
genres, because perpetual interest in (and readiness for) sex is considered to be both a
biological male given, and a masculine character flaw.
Porn's critics believe that pornography encourages men to project a 'masculinised' fantasy
of constant sexual readiness onto women, and often they imply that this is due to some
kind of intense 'drive' in men. To me, though, it seems more like intense wishful thinking.
In fact, most men and women are well aware that post-adolescence, men are not
perpetually interested in sex, nor are they perpetually ready for it. In fact, they have all
kinds of variations in arousability and sexual performance, according to mood and
circumstances. Men, like women, sometimes experience difficulty in sustaining sexual
excitement, or achieving orgasm. As many men and women know, male pleasure is not
an inevitable result of sexual activity. Male ejaculation is not proof of a totally
satisfactory sexual experience, any more than female orgasm is. Men can have sexual
pleasure without erection, or ejaculation. And they can have erection and ejaculation
202
without much pleasure. As Leo Bersani provocatively puts it, the 'big secret' about sex is
not that it is the source of heteronormative power relations, but that “most people don't
like it” (1987: 197). That is to say, sex, or more precisely orgasm, shatters the 'self'.
'Masculine' sexual performance presents men with a challenging struggle between the
desire to abandon themselves to the “radical self-disintegration” of pleasure, and to
maintain the boundaries around their “hyperbolic sense of self” (Thomas 1996: 21).
It is important to acknowledge that the material substance of semen is highly eroticised in
hetero porn - both visual and textual, and that the meaning of semen in the pornographic
context is as fluid as the substance itself. For example, in a not untypical fantasy story in
the Australian porn/contacts magazine Vixsin Swingers, the author, 'Adrian' recounts a
fantasy of watching his wife 'Jacquie' have sex with four of his friends. While it is, of
course, possible to argue that group sex/gangbang fantasies allow straight men to
eroticise other men 'through' the focus on a female character, in this particular story it is
not the bodies of Adrian's friends which are eroticised, but their semen, in and on
Jacquie’s body. After watching Jacquie in a number of ecstatic sexual combinations with
his friends, Adrian has fantasy of the evening's conclusion proceeds as follows:
It was all I could do not to join in the festivities, but I waited so we could
reminisce while I fucked you...You look so sexy laying there covered in cum
... I want to go down on you and clean out your hot cunt. I mean, I'd like to go
down on you if that wouldn't gross you out. Would you like me to clean out
your pussy, huh? (2002: 8)
203
The prelude to Adrian's orgasmic pleasure is licking other men's semen from his wife's
body. Easy as it would be to argue that this kind of fantasy involves a 'displacement' of
homoerotic desire onto a 'safe' female object, I argue that this kind of argument insists on
a rigid dichotomy of masculine/feminine and hetero/homo identification which fails to
recognise the complexity of possible erotic identities that might coexist and overlap in a
single subject. Semen and vaginal lubrication are not simply symbolic of masculinity and
femininity; they are the material substances of sexual pleasure. Not only men, but also
women can eroticise (be interested in, become excited by) bodily fluids in this context.
Both men and women may simultaneously be shamed, or disgusted by these same
processes. Indeed, dangerous, de-gendering 'sameness' evident in porn may work both
ways, acknowledging that some heterosexual women identify their own sexualities
through ‘pornographic’ desires and acts, and some heterosexual men identify themselves
sexually in reference to their own vulnerable, uncontrollable bodies.
A different kind of cumshot
Pornography itself has taken up the problems and ambivalences of heterosexual fantasy
and practice. The 'Buttman' series, launched by porn auteur filmmaker/producer John
Stagliano in 1991, heralded the beginning of a new genre of 'gonzo' porn, which breaks
with the conventions of porn - to massive success. The central conceit of the films is that
the world is full of exhibitionist hetero women who are itching to get into porn video, and
therefore can hardly wait for the filmmaker, “a shy, horny guy with a camera” (O'Toole,
204
1998: 186) arrive on the scene. Aside from this central fantasy, Stalin’s films seldom
have a narrative structure, and do not feature any scripted dialogue. The films proceed in
hand-held, porn-verite style, as the female performers begin by flashing, and teasing the
camera, while a humbly appreciative (and ‘surprised’) Stagliano comments on their
beauty and desirability. While Stagliano himself has sex on camera occasionally, he is
more frequently accompanied (and vicariously represented) by pornstar Rocco Siffredi
(who attracted a certain amount of controversial attention in Catharine Breillat's
Romance). Siffredi, (known in the Buttman series as 'Dario'), is a good looking, well-
built, well-hung Italian 36 year old married father of two, who makes films in Italy and
the US. He is known for a particular 'European' style, which combines aggressive dirty
talk and energetic 'macho' penetration with effusive displays of pleasure.
I am not Rocco's only fan. In Pornotopia, Laurence O'Toole observes that Rocco is
renowned within the porn industry as a star who genuinely “loves to fuck” (1998: 211),
and is “by far the biggest earning performer in the whole porn world” (1998:198).67
Unlike many US porn actors, Rocco not only talks during sex scenes, he sighs, groans
and cries out with pleasure. He also collapses, laughs, embraces and kisses his co-star (s)
after orgasm, although often Stagliano follows the conventions of the cumshot and cuts
away before the inevitable clean up of the 'wasted' semen. In one particular scene,
however (which is the literal climax of the video Buttman's European Vacation), Rocco
has three-way sex with two women in a motel room in Cannes, which concludes with a
67Rocco is a 'name' heterosexual pornstar, who, unusually for straight porn, is a 'brand' in his own right, with a range of 'lifelike' dildos modeled on his penis. The 10 1/2 inch 'life-size' model is available in Australian shops packaged in a 'bursting' box which contains it. There is also a 70% scaled 'training model' available, once again illustrating that the role of humour in the sex industry should not be underestimated.
205
characteristically abandoned cumshot on one woman's face. Although there are edits
within the three-way, the final shot is a continuous take, where Buttman (John Stagliano)
engages ‘Dario’ in dialogue directly after he orgasms. The scene breaks with numerous
porn conventions, in terms of dialogue, and action. Rocco's body is visibly shaking and
sweaty, as he gets up from the bed post-orgasm to engage in improvised narrative
dialogue with the film-maker/voyeur Stagliano.
This attempt at improvisation is doomed from the start - Rocco and his female co-stars
are too shaken by their corporeal performances to 'speak' the fantasy. When Stagliano
attempts to engage 'Dario' with a matey 'We should do this again sometime', Rocco the
exhausted actor hears a direction to do a re-take, responds with a horrified 'Again! No!' -
which is echoed by his co-stars, As Stagliano attempts to salvage the misunderstanding
by pressing on with dialogue, the women on the bed begin to overpower the scene. As
Stagliano and Siffredi speak, we hear one of the women exclaim “Ow, My eye!” and the
other reply “He always does that!” It is clear that one performer has semen in her eye,
and this is not an uncommon side effect of the facial cumshot. Still, the camera does not
cut away. As one woman tries to help the other wipe her eye with a hand-towel, Rocco is
abandons Stagliano to join them, repeating “Oh, sorry baby, sorry, sorry” as he too picks
up a towel to dab his semen from his co-star's stinging eye. Although Stagliano
intervenes to 'close' the scene, the accidental mis-aimed ejaculation, injury, apology and
clean-up are not excluded from the pornographic narrative. In gonzo porn, fantasy is
important, but there are misunderstandings and miscommunications, accidents happen,
and messes have to be cleaned up.
206
Conclusions
Of course, it could be argued that Siffredi's 'mastery' is reinforced by coming in his
fellow performer's eye - many viewers who oppose porn and cumshots as evidence of
hetero-masculinist oppression could choose to read the scene this way. Yet Rocco's own
stated preference for facial cumshots is put in terms of 'enjoyment', rather than 'mastery':
In my films, I always ejaculate in the face of the models, never somewhere
else. Because from the expression on their face, you can tell if they really
liked what they did or not...They really have to enjoy sex. That's why my
films are quality products
(www.planetrapido.com/carnal/sexperts/rocco/htm).
There is no doubt that porn's critics are disgusted by porn's fantastic incitement to 'look
back' at the masturbating viewer, no doubt reading the above statement as just one more
piece of evidence that porn involves women being forced to participate in unpleasant
heterosexual acts. But the fantasy here is not necessarily of degradation, but of
quantifiable mutual pleasure. Although pornography shows 'real sex', it is, paradoxically,
an unreal fantasy. Those who seek to produce 'quality' porn clearly feel this acutely -
Stagliano has stated that he developed the 'gonzo' style out of a desire to make the 'fake'
sex in porn seem 'more real', less choreographed and more clumsy and passionate. The
intermingling of shame/disgust and excitement/joy is apparent in Siffredi's desire for the
207
pornographic to 'look back', to not make him (as the representative of the masturbating
viewer) 'strange' by looking away. By 'playing' with sexual mess and discomfort,
pornography allows daredevils of shame to enhance sexual pleasure without having to
insist on a clean and natural 'body pride', or, indeed, on the impossible 'clean and proper
body' which is fantasised by the psychoanalytic subject.
While the presence of a female body may serve to comfort male sexual anxiety, effacing
the vulnerability of the shameful, solitary masturbator, there are many forms of
heterosexual pornography that offers more than a straightforward (and straight) male
subject/female object position. There are opportunities for revelling in abjection, rather
than pushing it away onto an 'other', and for experiencing, if only for a moment, the
experience of loss and dissolution, the blurring of subject/object boundaries as pleasure,
rather than danger.
208
Chapter 6
The trouble with anal sex
The equation of heterosexual vaginal intercourse with compulsory heterosexuality has
been widely criticised, particularly by radical feminists (see Dworkin 1987, Jeffreys 1990
and Greer 1997). Interestingly, feminist critiques of normalising sex advice have been
mainstreamed into popular culture, particularly the detailed discussions of sex practices
which occur in ‘women’s’ media such as Cleo magazine and Sex and the City. The
degree to which these ‘pop-theoretical’ understandings of sex practices have changed is
particularly notable in discussions of sex practices which have traditionally been
considered taboo among heterosexuals.
For those who would argue, with Sheila Jeffreys, that heterosexuality is ‘the eroticisation
of a power imbalance’, the specifics of sex practices and sexual negotiation are
particularly problematic. It is true that heteronormative models of sexual relations
represent men as ‘doing’ and woman as ‘done to’. Within this framework, men are
assumed to be sexually desiring and sexually proficient. They are also presumed to be the
initiators of heterosexual encounters. In contrast, ‘normal’ heterosexual women are
assumed to be sexually reticent, until ‘awakened’ by a suitable and skilful male partner.
Attempts to redress the power imbalances inherent within heteronormativity have tended
to focus on proscribing certain forms of ‘bad’ sexual speech and sexual practice, and
encouraging women to both know and actively assert their sexual desires. Yet certain
desires are still highly conflicted and problematic. Although radical feminists have
209
argued against the practice of all kinds of penetrative sex as ‘passive’, I would argue that,
as Kippax and Smith put it, “to forbid passivity, in whatever form it takes, does not
resolve the problem of phallocentric power structures. Indeed, the injunction against
passivity is internal to phallocentrism” (2001: 430). However, while vaginal intercourse
is considered redeemable by most ‘liberal’ feminists, anal intercourse is often figured
quite differently, as a ‘demeaning’ practice which is most likely provoked by male desire
and coercion, and can only ever be ‘tolerated’ by the female heterosexual. It is as if the
injunctions against ‘penetration as male domination’ have been found to be somewhat
exaggerated in the case of one orifice, but absolutely true in the other.
Interestingly, the strongest rejections of receptive female eroticism in recent times are put
forward by Germaine Greer, who explicitly states that anal intercourse is a rejection not
only of women’s reproductive function but of heterosexual love itself (see Greer 1997,
1999) – a very ‘essentialist’ view in many senses of the word. There is any number of
conflicting discourses around anal intercourse. It is ‘gay’ sex, and therefore is considered
to be more desired by men than women. It is, post HIV/AIDS, ‘dangerous’ sex which can
lead to the transmission of HIV from ‘deceitful’ bisexual men to ‘innocent’ heterosexual
women. And, above all, it flouts the natural purpose of the female body, because the
anus, as opposed to the vagina, is not ‘designed’ for intercourse. Yet, paradoxically, these
very prohibitions against anal intercourse make the practice itself more appealing for
heterosexuals, as its uncompromisingly unnatural and taboo status make it ‘the last
frontier’ of hetero experimentation. Furthermore, the association of anal intercourse with
the transmission of the HIV virus has, I will argue, encouraged a flourishing of practical
210
‘expert’ advice in the popular media which has in turn provided new opportunities for
non-normative heterosexual pleasures.
Anal intercourse, it seems, poses a severe threat to the normalised categories of sex and
gender. It is possible to argue that, when a man penetrates another man, the one
penetrated is being ‘treated like a woman’. It is possible to argue that, when a man
penetrates a woman, she is being ‘treated like a man’. And also to argue, paradoxically,
that when a woman penetrates a man, she is reiterating her own castration, and bolstering
his sense of phallic superiority. I can think of no other sexual practice which destabilises
the categories of man and woman and straight and gay in quite the same way. As Eve
Sedgwick puts it, “anal eroticism will propel the subject into an area of our culture where
the gender dimorphism of discourse is almost unthinkably extreme” (1994: 203). Yet, as
Jonathan Dollimore argues, the confusion around who does what to whom, and what he
or she ‘becomes’ through anal eroticism and anal intercourse, allows for a productive
rethinking of these supposedly oppositional categories of man/woman and hetero/homo,
in which “we are not all the same. [But] we are differences which are radically
proximate” (Dollimore 1990: 229).
The proximate sex
According to Freud, “we actually describe a sexual activity as perverse if it has given up
the aim of reproduction and pursues the attainment of pleasure as an aim independent of
it” (quoted in Dollimore 1990: 175). Following this medical model, as Dollimore
observes, almost every contemporary sexually active person is now a pervert, actual or
aspiring (1990: 175). However, psychoanalytic theory represents only one of many
211
critical attempts to account for sexual desires and pleasures, and it has its limitations.
According to Dollimore:
Freud discloses the displacement of sexuality into culture ... But displacement
also goes the other way ... social crisis and conflict are endlessly displaced into
sexuality. And this may be the more important kind of displacement. Certainly
it is why today perhaps the most important task of sexual politics ... is to chart
this displacement of the political into the sexual (in contrast, for example, to
liberating the sexual) (1990:181).
In his study of modern and pre-modern theories of perversion, Dollimore explores the
social anxieties regarding taboo and transgression which have been displaced into
sexuality in the construction of ‘normal’ and ‘perverse’ sexual categories. In readings of
authors such as Oscar Wilde, André Gidé and Radclyffe Hall, and historical examination
of biblical, theological and early modern accounts of perversity, Dollimore reveals that
the contemporary confusions around anal intercourse are not unique – indeed perversity,
be it a physical or textual practice, is commonly understood as a kind of paradox.
Perverse practices are viewed, paradoxically, both as ‘against nature’ and as the product
of ‘giving in’ to nature; perversion “is very often perceived as at once utterly alien to
what it threatens, and yet, mysteriously inherent within it” (Dollimore 1990: 121).
According to this history, it is not surprising that, in his perverse rereading of
psychoanalytic texts, Dollimore produces his own form of ‘liberationist’ theory in which
sexual perversion, “conventionally imagined as the definitive manifestation of
inauthenticity and even degeneracy, becomes ... the expression and rediscovery of an
212
original intensity of being; even, perhaps an original integrity of being” (1990: 179).
Following Foucault, Dollimore notes that the psychoanalytic model of ‘normal’
heterosexual development depends on the central trope of perversion. In the development
from the polymorphous perversity of early childhood to the genitally focused
heterosexually oriented ‘normal adulthood’, one must ‘limit’ oneself to one sex or the
other, but this must occur via a ‘detour’ of attraction to, and intense love for, the parent
of the same sex. It could be argued, then, that political or cultural insistence on strict
gender ‘differences’ and sexual ‘opposites’ serves to mask anxiety around the proximity
of men and women, and heterosexuals and homosexuals:
... if, within the construction of homosexuality as a fear or refusal of
otherness, there may also be a projection by the male heterosexual on to the
homosexual of his fear of the woman as other, there may also be a disavowal
of the heterosexual’s fear of the homosexual as the same – that is, a fear of
those gender proximities and interconnections ... whose feared mutual
implication compromises not only the ideology of sexual difference, but the
cultural formation it underwrites (Dollimore 1990: 272-273).
While Dollimore focuses particularly on male heterosexual anxiety around
homosexuality, it is interesting to note that some heterosexual feminists have also
demonstrated an anxiety towards gay men on the basis of their sexual ‘rejection’ of
women, just as some heterosexual men have chosen to view lesbians as ‘hating men’
rather than ‘loving women’ (see Gallop 1989; Rich 1980). As Dollimore puts it, the
threat of sexual/erotic difference “is never the absolutely unfamiliar, but the reordering of
213
the already known, a disclosure of the radical interconnectedness which is the social, but
which present cultures can rarely afford to acknowledge and must instead disavow”
(1990: 230). Anal intercourse can draw unsettling attention to the proximity of male to
female, since it emphasises the sameness of the male and female anus rather than the
difference of male and female genitals. Since heterosexual men are capable of
experiencing anal pleasure, and even penetration at the hands (or dildo) of a woman, anal
intercourse also reveals the unsettling proximity of gay to straight. If what is ‘already
known’ is that one sex/gender penetrates (and is powerful) and the other is penetrated
(and powerless), then it is no wonder that the proximity of anus to vagina, and anus to
penis, is disavowed as vigorously as the difference between penis and vagina is insisted
upon.
Crimes against nature
In US states where sodomy is still illegal, a person is deemed to have committed the act
of sodomy “when he performs or submits to any sexual act involving the sex organ of
one person and the mouth or anus of another” (Weiss 1989: 101). Like the Tasmanian
‘anti-gay’ laws which prohibited oral sex, anti-sodomy laws reflect the classic notion of
perversion, where mouth and anus are conflated as ‘unnatural’, non-reproductive organs,
not to be touched by sex organs – that is to say, genitals.
However, while anal penetration of a woman, or a man by a woman, is technically
‘against the law’, heterosexual sodomy is largely forgotten by law enforcers.
Heterosexual sex is not considered to be a matter of public interest, and is generally not
214
subject to legal scrutiny, unless people make their sexuality public in some way. If the
law so desires, anti-sodomy laws can be stretched to cover all kinds of unusual sexual
circumstances, as in Annie Sprinkle’s arrest in 1978 by the Rhode Island police for
‘sodomy’ and ‘conspiracy to commit sodomy’. In Sprinkle’s words:
The sodomy charge stemmed from the fact that I had had sex with my friend
Long Jean Silver, who had a leg without a foot. She had made love to me
[vaginally] with her sexy stump, and we photographed this delight ... (1998:
47-48).
According to Sprinkle, the legal definition of sodomy in Rhode Island is “an abominable,
detestable crime against nature” (1998: 48). In this case, vaginal penetration by ankle (or
shin) was legally deemed sodomy, although the photos of the event, which Sprinkle has
since published, do not involve the ‘misuse’ of either a mouth or an anus68. The act was
made doubly criminal by the presence of a photographer, and the intent to distribute the
images – in fact, given the flexibility (or anxiety) of the law, any kind of sex which
occurs in front of a camera might also be considered ‘a crime against nature’.
As Dollimore observes, the proscription of sodomy as a crime against nature has a long
history in both religious and civil law. Prior to the nineteenth century:
Sodomy was associated with witches, demons, werewolves, basilisks,
foreigners and (of course) papists; and it apparently signified a wide range of
practices including prostitution, under-age sex, coitus interruptus, and female
68 The charges were dropped by the Rhode Island police when local disability activists threatened to protest against the trial.
215
transvestism. Socially, sodomy was repeatedly equated with heresy and
political treason; metaphysically it was conceived as ‘sexual confusion in
whatever form’ [Sodomy was] not part of the created order but an aspect of its
dissolution (1990: 238).
What, then, is the ‘natural’ order being challenged, and why is the threat so great? In his
study of Sade’s ‘anti-natural’ explorations of sodomy and other non-reproductive
perversions, Alan S. Weiss argues that Sade’s excesses of sex, torture and murder target
the paradox by which cultural law-givers attempt to normalise or legitimise some sexual
practices, and prohibit others, through appeals to nature. Weiss points out that:
... if there is to be any civilisation whatsoever, the cultural field must be
rigorously separated from the natural domain: the term human nature is an
oxymoron, since it is precisely the unnatural which is particularly human ....
Nature is that which must be transgressed in order to affirm one’s humanity,
one’s sovereignty; yet that nature can never be transgressed since we are part
of it – an impossible dialectic (1989:103-104).
Whereas in Sade’s time the natural order might be defined by church or state,
contemporary appeals to nature are generally put forward within scientific
frameworks. These appeals, however, tend to demonstrate the same conflating of
‘the natural’ with what has culturally been deemed ‘good’ – particularly when
justifications for the proscription of certain practices are couched in terms of the
body’s design. One could argue, for example, that anal intercourse is potentially
dangerous because the anus was not ‘designed’ to be penetrated, while the vagina
216
was designed exactly for this purpose. But who has seen the blue prints for
penetration? One could argue that most women’s vaginas produce lubricating fluid,
and that this ‘prepares’ them for intercourse. The level of lubrication varies
considerably from woman to woman, however, and can be affected by stress and
environment, as well as different stages in the hormonal cycle. Sex manuals list
pages of instructions on the correct techniques for ‘preparing’ the vagina for
intercourse. But what if there was no pre-existing cultural assumption that vaginal
intercourse was normal or healthy? Would we still think the same way about
vaginas? If we did not already have the pre-conceived notion that vaginal
penetration is normal, would those women who do not lubricate much, who are
allergic to latex and spermicide, who find penetration painful, or who suffer from
recurring thrush, cystitis or vaginitis be encouraged to ‘soldier on’? (see Goldsmith
1995). Would woman who suffered from vaginismus (a spasm of the vaginal
muscles that makes penetration painful or impossible) still be sent to counsellors
and therapists? Would there be the same proliferation of hints and tips on foreplay,
position and ‘communication’? Or would we instead see advice like the following:
The vagina is a very delicate structure, designed for the evacuation of
menstrual blood. While some women may enjoy the insertion of a finger or
penis, great care must be taken not to cause injury. For many women, a
penis, sex toys, or even a finger can cause vaginal irritation or infections.
The introduction of semen, latex and/or spermicides into the vagina has
been shown to cause allergic reactions, infections and vaginal discharge.
While some couples may choose to try this kind of activity on occasion, it is
217
better not to persist if any discomfort occurs.
Women who fear vaginal penetration are reassured with the reminder that ‘the vagina is
designed to stretch enough to accommodate a baby’s head’, but this describes an ideal
situation. Many women’s vaginas are abraded or torn in childbirth, and damage to the
pelvic floor is seen as a ‘normal’ result of vaginal delivery. Even births supervised by
‘medical experts’ still result in death, or near death.
Clearly, vaginal intercourse can be uncomfortable, painful or even dangerous, but
heterosexual women find ways to deal with the everyday risks. First World women, with
access to soap, running water and preventive medicine, find that most of the hazards of
vaginal intercourse can be easily avoided, despite all of the vagina’s inherent ‘design
faults’(interestingly, the penis, which could be said to have quite a few design limitations
of its own, is rarely discussed in quite this way). So, vaginal intercourse may not
necessarily be natural nor healthy, yet it can easily be made that way. It is assumed that
heterosexual women are willing to do the maintenance work required for pleasurable,
painless vaginal intercourse, and that this willingness reflects our desire to engage in the
activity, whether we desire it for our own pleasure or our partner(s)’. Anal intercourse is,
however, imagined quite differently.
Everyday heterosex in Cleo Magazine
In November 1999, Cleo’s cover headline promised readers ‘REAL WOMEN DOING
IT: What we want, how bad, and the anal sex thing’. This first-ever explicit mention of
anal sex on a Cleo cover was linked to an article entitled ‘Sex and the City’ which ‘asked
218
six sassy, dating career girls to watch the first five episodes of Sex and the City and give
... their honest opinion of some of the show’s more provocative themes’ (Simicevic 1999:
102). Cleo’s creation of a panel of professional women to discuss the issues in the
program echoed the narrative formula of Sex and the City itself, in which the central
characters’ conversations themselves present ‘balanced’ yet highly subjective debates on
various issues. Part of the pleasure for the viewer (at least for this viewer) is the manner
in which the ‘hot topic’ of the week is explored by the friends. Although the show’s
writers occasionally break from this formula, it is fair to say that in most of the
discussions (and sexual adventures) Charlotte will be the conservative, Samantha the
radical, Miranda the rational pragmatist, and Carrie the slightly neurotic
observer/commentator. Interestingly, in most episodes of Sex and the City, sexual
knowledge is gained through personal experience (or through personal discussions of the
experiences of friends and peers), rather than through the solicitation of ‘expert’ opinion.
Indeed, when the characters occasionally do seek the advice of formal experts, the
encounters are clearly of limited usefulness compared to the advice and support of the
group of friends.69
Nikolas Rose (1990, 1992) draws on Foucault’s concept of governmentality to argue that,
since World War Two, expertise has increasingly served as a governmental tool.
Although liberalism demands that the state ‘stay out of the home’, Rose argues that the
private home is of public or ‘governmental’ importance as the source of ‘normal, healthy,
69 Consultation with experts is generally a one-off experience for the Sex and the City characters, and tends to provide either a one-off comic scenario (in the case of their visit to a tantra workshop), or simple plot exposition. One example of the 'plot exposition' device is Charlotte and Trey's visit to a marriage guidance counsellor. The therapist provides a clue regarding Trey's recurring impotence – he is psychologically unable to see his wife as 'sexual'. Charlotte then calls Carrie, who offers 'expert' advice on how to test the professional's hypothesis, and the therapist does not appear again.
219
law abiding’ citizens. While Rose (1990) particularly focuses on the family as producer
of ‘healthy’, productive children, it is clear that sexual health and happiness affects
productivity also, particularly with the growing emphasis on our “rights to choose what
we do with our bodies, our feelings, our identities, our relationships, our gender, our
eroticisms and our representations” (Plummer 1995: 17).
The job of the expert, Rose asserts, is to advise and encourage the rational liberal subject
towards self-surveillance and self-help so that institutional intervention is almost
unnecessary. As a result of the now mainstream access to behavioural theory, social
research and medical advice, “life has become a skilled performance” (Rose 1990: 238),
where we are free to choose between sexual lifestyles in a climate which is largely self-
policing and self-censoring, or at least (in Australia) “bounded only by law at the
margins” (1990: 220). The field in which ‘expertise’ operates is in fact:
…a complex web, in a plane neither ‘public’ nor ‘private’, neither
‘statutory’ nor ‘voluntary’, in which the codes, conventions, and skills of
psychotherapy [and sex therapy] are addressed to all the multifarious
problems of life (1990: 214).
Ken Plummer observes that contemporary media sex advisers have a kind of
panoptic gaze: they both establish and report on statistical norms, and literally
‘normalise’ the reader through the question-and-answer advice-giving process. As
the experts interpret the questioner’s experience according to ‘scientific’ norms,
readers and audience members can gauge their own sexual health or normality
against the mediated version. As described by Rose:
220
Normality appears in three guises: as that which is natural and hence
healthy; as that against which the actual is judged and found unhealthy; and
that which can be produced using rationalised social programmes (1990:
130).
However, chat shows, women’s magazines and infotainment programming often move
away from the panoptic, centralised model of expertise, and concentrate instead on ‘real-
life’ experience. While some have argued that these media self-help genres individualise
experiences of injustice and inequity that would be better understood in a politicised
context, others (such as Lumby 1999) argue that these ‘voice of experience’ panels offer
a voice to the diversity of non-normative experience that would not otherwise exist in the
mainstream media. Given that Sex and the City is based on the writing of sex-columnist
Candace Bushnell, it is not surprising that sexual issues are discussed in the personalised,
experiential voice of the women’s magazine. And, as Saywell and Pittham (1996)
observe, articles about sex in women’s magazines can “facilitate the formation of
temporary communities” of heterosexual women by adopting a conversational tone of
address which positions the readers as “friends” and “workmates” (1996: 60).
Like Sex and the City, the ‘Sex and the City’ article in Cleo focuses on “voices of
experience” rather than voices of expertise, promising to “uncover the truth about how
real women feel about love, men and sex” (Simicevic 1999: 102). The six panellists’
discussions have clearly been edited, but Simicevic does not provide any kind of editorial
overview, or ask a psychologist or dating expert to add their authority (although expert
commentary is standard in many Cleo articles on sex and sexuality). The Cleo panellists
221
have clearly been chosen to reflect the characters in the television program: all work in
visual or media-based industries, and all have position descriptions which imply some
kind of tertiary education; Jude, for example, is a 28-year-old PR manager (like
Samantha) and Alison is a 31-year-old art curator (like Charlotte).
Each sexual practice is discussed in the context of a particular episode of Sex and the
City; thus, the discussion of heterosexual anal sex is based on episode 4, ‘valley of the
twenty-something guys’. The discussion is introduced by a quote from the program itself:
“Anal sex – it’s about control. Whoever goes up there will hold the power”. (This is
clearly a ‘feminist reading’, even though it is not an accurate quote. In the episode itself
the characters say that after you go ‘up there’, one partner will hold the power: ‘either
you or him!’) At any rate, 26-year-old fashion designer Natalie’s take on anal sex is: “I
question a guy’s sexuality that wants it ... It’s a power thing: guys know most women are
anti it” (Simicevic1999:105). I cannot be sure why Natalie is questioning the guy’s
sexuality, but let us assume that she thinks he is either insecure, or secretly gay or
bisexual.
Alison, the art curator, follows up with “I don’t mind talking about it – but I don’t do it”
(Simicevic 1999: 105), and goes on to say that she had an ex whose insistence on anal
was a key factor in her decision to break up with him – she thinks “he was using it as a
power mechanism”. Two of the panellists claim to be unable to comment, possibly on the
basis of lack of experience. Another says: “I actually wanted to go there because I
thought it would take our sexual relationship to another level. I felt we’d been
everywhere else and that was the last frontier. But it just didn’t work for me.” She goes
222
on to add that she has “a lot of girlfriends who do it and say it’s the most amazing
experience”, to which Jude (who has previously claimed to be unable to comment)
replies, “I think it’s really only a minority who talk about it and do it”. The discussion
concludes with this exchange between Alison and 25-year-old market research executive
Rebecca:
Rebecca: It’s not actually that big a deal, but it’s not something I would do
or try outside of a relationship. I think it’s an extremely intimate request.
Alison: Unless she gets off on it.
Rebecca: Then it would be wise for her to have an awareness of how men
view that. If she’s prepared to take the risk of being labelled a certain way,
then it’s fine for her to say ‘Look, I really like it up the bum’ (Simicevic
1999: 105).
Rebecca’s statement mirrors that of Sex and the City’s Charlotte, who declines to
have anal sex with her new boyfriend because he may be “the one”, that is, her
potential husband. She wants him to see her as the possible mother of his children,
not the “up the butt girl”. The message is clear: anal sex makes you a slut, and sluts
do not get to be wives and mothers. The Cleo panel presents us with a diverse
collection of opinions regarding anal sex, which I see as fairly representative of
both women’s magazines and the broader culture – namely, that anal sex is:
about men controlling women
223
a power mechanism
sought by men of ‘questionable’ sexuality
the last frontier of sexual experimentation
extremely intimate and therefore only appropriate within a relationship
the most amazing experience
not that big a deal
a minority taste, and
not something we talk about.
The Cleo discussion does not, however, address the kinds of medicalised or ‘scientific’
advice which is usually prevalent in media discussions of ‘bad’ sex, and, interestingly,
refers to neither of the spectres which usually dominate this kind of conversation: pain
and faeces. It does, however, raise some interesting issues with regard to the shaky
foundations of heteronormativity. Although heterosexuality is supposedly a matter of
object choice (i.e. all differently sexed couplings are ‘heterosexual’), it is clear that
particular ‘bad’ sexual practices undermine this certainty, and anal sex is the ‘bad’ sexual
practice par excellence.
While both men and women can be anally penetrated, receptive anal sex is so often
characterised as gay sex that it is often seen that way when the receptive partner is a
woman. As a practice, anal sex has many complex layers of meaning, yet the bulk of
theoretical writing on heterosexuality has either ignored it or assumed it represents a
simple, one-way power dynamic. It is seen as ‘men’s sex’, something dirty that only bad
men ask for, and only bad women agree to – and even they do not really enjoy it. As
224
Susie Bright observes, until recently “most people considered anal penetration for women
synonymous with rape [and] assumed that pornstarlets who take it up the ass must be
either masochists or making obscene amounts of money for their ‘pain”’ (1998)70. As Eve
Sedgwick observes, the feminist tendency to view anal intercourse as inherently
‘degrading’ to women, and therefore outside the bounds of female desire, reproduces a
broader absence or denial around both heterosexual and lesbian women’s diversity of
erotic desire and pleasures:
Although there is no reason to suppose that women experience, in some
imaginary quantitative sense, ‘less’ anal eroticism than men do, it can as far as
I can determine almost be said as a flat fact that, since classical times, there
has been no important and sustained Western discourse in which women’s
anal eroticism means… anything (1996: 204, original emphasis).
The last frontier
What, then, does the ‘everyday’ conversation in the ‘Sex and the City’ article tell us
about the meanings of anal sex for heterosexual women? It suggests that, while there is
no single prevailing discourse of active female anal eroticism, there are multiple,
conflicting discourses around anal eroticism which have the potential to unsettle the
categories of ‘heterosexual’ and ‘woman’. To quote Sedgwick again, the absence of a
70 As Jack Morin points out in his book Anal Pleasure and Health (dubbed by Bright “the bible of anal sanity”), the conscious or unconscious idea that anal sex isn't 'really' pleasurable for the receptive partner can lead receptive women and men to mistakenly accept pain as a 'natural' consequence of penetration. (Morin, 1987) Likewise, insertive partners who don't expect their partner to enjoy penetration are more likely to be rough and insensitive. They are also more likely to expect a partner who is sometimes interested in anal to be permanently available and receptive. After all, they've done it before, so why get all 'tight-assed' now?
225
fixed ‘meaning’ for female anal receptivity:
is a really quite large vacant space in our culture that presents a kind of lovely
laboratory for the testing of a Foucauldian hypothesis ... How far can or will
an already gendered and physically very localised desire swerve, how
radically will it misrecognise itself, in its need to join a pre-existing current to
become manifest, to be fulfilled, manipulated, or even frankly repressed – to
become, in short, meaningful. The answer is: quite far indeed (1994: 206).
Thus, the various conflicting discourses in the Cleo article offer a fertile starting point for
exploring changing popular cultural understandings of what it means to be a ‘normal’
heterosexual. For example, the assertion that anal sex is ‘the last frontier’ for
heterosexual couples fits in well with heterosexual ‘expert’ advice from the 1970s and
1980s. Alex Comfort’s approach to the topic in the classic hetero sex manual The Joy of
Sex is representative in this respect, cautiously offering anal sex as a ‘Sauce and Pickle’,
or sexual side dish for heterosexuals: “This is something nearly every couple tries once”
(1984: 118). After a few cautions regarding yeast infections, haemorrhoids and the need
to go slow (all pretty reasonable), Comfort makes it clear that anal intercourse is
something men do to women: “With the woman kneeling , head well down, carefully
lubricate your glans” (1984: 118, emphasis added). While Comfort states that “the anus is
sensitive in most people”, receptive anal intercourse is not suggested for men. And it is
clear, too, that anal sex is only ever experimental sex for heterosexuals:
Unless you find it very rewarding and are free from the feeling that it’s
unaesthetic, we doubt if it’s worth doing more than satisfying curiosity and
226
the occasional impulse this way ... (1984: 118).
This style of heterosexual advice regarding anal intercourse may seem quite reasonable,
but it contrasts vividly with the advice regarding vaginal penetration, particularly advice
offered by women’s magazines. In March 1982, for example, a teenage virgin who wrote
to ‘Cleo Doctor’ fearing that her vagina would be “too small” for sex was told: “When
you find the right man and are ready for sex, I am sure you’ll find the slight resistance of
your hymen quickly and easily overcome” (1982: 26). Although Cleo Doctor warned
many such letter-writers against being coerced by men into unwanted sex, generally it
was assumed that, ‘when the time is right’, vaginal sex could be both desirable and
pleasurable, as indeed it can be. Women who wrote to the Cleo columnist complaining of
a long-term lack of vaginal pleasure were advised to read some self-help/masturbation
books, or see a sex therapist. That is, it was assumed that changes could be made to
improve their unsatisfactory experiences, and that they would actually want to make
those changes.
In contrast to this professional reassurance, anal sex was discussed in a very different
tone. In June 1983, a 45-year-old who had, in her own words, had “always had a very
good sex life”, wrote to ‘Cleo adviser’ Wendy McCarthy regarding an unsuccessful
attempt at anal sex. The woman, who was having treatment for haemorrhoids at the time,
had found anal sex with her partner to be understandably painful. Cleo responded:
Of course you shouldn’t have to take part in any sexual activity if you don’t
want to. The fact that you tried it and found it painful and unacceptable to
you is sufficient reason to say no. If you are being treated for haemorrhoids
227
that would add to your discomfort, so certainly do not consider trying it
again while that problem remains. If your sex life is satisfying otherwise, I’d
suggest you put this incident down to experience and continue to enjoy your
current sexual repertoire with your husband (McCarthy 1983:21).
Aside from the last sentence, which is eerily reminiscent of Comfort’s advice, this
‘reassuring reply’ seems to be the antithesis of the reassurance given to women who do
not enjoy vaginal sex. Although the adviser flirts with the idea that the woman might
want to try again when her haemorrhoids clear up, the general tone is ‘been there, done
that’ – the frontier has been crossed, and that is all that matters. Specific advice was not
offered on other forms of anal eroticism (such as oral/anal or digital/anal stimulation) that
might either replace anal intercourse or serve as foreplay. Nor was any advice offered
regarding the necessity for relaxation and, most importantly, lubrication.
Shifting frontiers – HIV and the queering of heterosexual pleasure
Since the late 1980s sexual information with regards to both health and technique has
increasingly reflected the influences of grassroots feminist and queer politics – namely
the women’s health movement and the work of community-based HIV/AIDS activists.
Partly this may be due to the maturing of those who moved from egalitarian collectives of
the 1970s, gained ‘legitimate’ qualifications and assumed skilled bureaucratic roles in the
late 1980s and 1990s. However, it is also likely that the federal Labor governments of the
1980s and early 1990s (and particular federal ministers such as Neal Blewett) were more
open to recognising community-derived expertise, and more likely to allow grassroots
228
political concerns to shape health policies.71
Whatever the reason(s), members of these community health movements have been able
to organise and disseminate information from within recognisably authoritative bodies
such as the Family Planning Association and the AIDS Council of NSW (ACON).
Popular discussions of sexuality and sexual practices (particularly those which explicitly
take the form of direct advice to readers or viewers) have accordingly reflected the public
health messages distributed by these organisations. It is not surprising, therefore, to see
implicitly ‘feminist’ views on sexuality and sexual practices reflected in popular or
entertainment-oriented discussions of sexuality, particularly in discussions of the highly
charged or taboo subjects.
Magazines like Cleo responded quickly to the HIV/AIDS education strategies pioneered
by organisations like ACON. Although other countries responded to the horror of the
epidemic with the ‘just say no’ education, the Australian response focused on harm-
minimisation, which aimed to give people the opportunity to make informed choices
about safer sex. In education aimed at heterosexual women, this created a new
atmosphere where even a ‘bad’ practice like anal sex could be discussed in terms of ‘how
to’ rather than just ‘yes or no’. If only in the form of a safety tip, anal sex was now
acknowledged as something many women did, and did more than once. Susie Bright
actually credits the negative US-style HIV/AIDS warnings with increasing the popularity
of anal sex. Her theory is that “while everyone was reading about the fatal dangers of
receptive anal intercourse, a lot of heterosexuals were thinking ‘Wow, it must feel
71 For a comprehensive history of the Australian response to HIV/AIDS see Sendziuk (2003).
229
awfully good for people to take these insane risks”’ (Bright 1998).
In November 1994, Cleo released a safe sex booklet in collaboration with the
Commonwealth Department of Human Services and Health. Entitled The Only Safe Sex
Guide You’ll Ever Need, the booklet was launched with lots of publicity by the then
Health Minister, Carmen Lawrence. The Only Safe Sex Guide contained information
from the Family Planning Association, the National Women’s Health Program and the
AIDS Councils of NSW and the ACT, and was ground-breaking in terms of safe sex
information for heterosexuals. For straight women, the contrast between this new
message and the 1980s ‘Tell him if it’s not on, it’s not on’ approach was huge. No longer
were they being given messages which reinforced the model of women as sexual gate-
keepers who could say only yes or no to ‘good’ or ‘bad’ sex (Susan Kippax, Cathy
Waldby, June Crawford 1990).
Instead of assuming that all readers were primarily interested in penis–in-vagina
penetration, The Only Safe Sex Guide listed numerous sex practices, assuming they were
all things women might like to do. Like the safe sex education aimed at gay men, The
Only Safe Sex Guide began with the assumption that readers wanted to have sex, and then
explained which practices were safer. The section headed ‘Everything you ever wanted to
know about SAFE SEX (but were afraid to ask)’, for example, started out telling its
women readers “it ain’t what you do, it’s the way that you do it” (1994: 18) and went on
to list 24 sexual practices, including fist fucking, voyeurism and golden showers. The
degree of risk of transmission of HIV or hepatitis was explained for each practice. Even
more radical was the article ‘Satisfaction Guaranteed’, which encouraged non-penetrative
230
sex practices (such as striptease and talking dirty) as safer alternatives, with plenty of
handy ‘how to’ tips (the possibility of hot, non-penetrative sex had not been widely
promoted in safe sex education media for women up until this point).
Surprisingly (or perhaps not surprisingly), it was an article on anal sex that caused
trouble for Cleo, and Carmen Lawrence. The article, ‘The Agony and the Ecstasy’, was
shockingly based on the assumption that some women enjoy anal sex. Not all women, but
some. It went further by describing what women liked about it, and giving safer sex tips.
The article finished on a revolutionary note by claiming that anal sex was analogous to
‘regular’ intercourse:
Like vaginal intercourse without sufficient arousal, anal sex should not be
attempted unless both partners are completely willing, the anus has been
gently dilated and plenty of lubrication has been used on the condom
(Osfield 1994: 52).
With statements like “studies suggest anywhere between 40 and 60 per cent of women
have tried anal sex” (Osfield 1994: 50) and the innovative comparison of vaginal and
anal penetration, ‘The Agony and the Ecstasy’ was too much for conservative politicians.
Senator John Herron wrote to Cleo editor Lisa Wilkinson complaining that the magazine
had “promoted sodomy as acceptable heterosexual behaviour” (Wilkinson 1995: 25).
Paul Neville, the federal member for Hinkler, said: “It disturbs me greatly that taxpayers’
money was spent to encourage unsavoury and positively unsafe sexual practices”
(Wilkinson 1995: 25).
231
This outrage was probably partly aimed at Carmen Lawrence, who had her political
enemies. But it is interesting that, out of all the possible ‘unsavoury’ or potentially
‘unsafe’ practices listed in The Only Safe Sex Guide, sodomy was the winner. By
suggesting that some women enjoyed anal sex, Cleo was seen as ‘promoting’ anal
intercourse, and Carmen Lawrence was forced to specifically defend ‘The Agony and the
Ecstasy’ in Federal Parliament:
Let’s face the fact that in terms of absolute numbers, more women will have
anal sex than will homosexual couples. In percentage terms, certainly the
number is lower, but absolutely speaking ... anywhere between 10 and 15
per cent of women, or heterosexual couples will have anal sex (Wilkinson,
1995: 25).
Despite all the political and moral turmoil over The Only Safe Sex Guide, magazine sex
advice aimed at straight women had begun to talk about anal sex in a new way. Although
Cleo articles about it were still given good old-fashioned headings like ‘The SEX ACT
men love and women hate’ (Cleo April 1995), anal intercourse was discussed more often
as something which could be done both safely and pleasurably. Advice columnists such
as Australian Cosmopolitan’s Tracey Cox began to instruct their correspondents in the
exploration of anal pleasure, advising external anal massage and/or insertion of a well-
lubed finger before any penis-in-anus penetration took place:
Start by experimenting with a gentler kind of anal stimulation. The next
time you have sex, get him to penetrate your anus with his finger ... if you
enjoy this, try two fingers and see how you like being massaged in a circular
232
motion (1998:46).
Anal sex and power
To suggest, as one Cleo panellist did, that anal sex is about ‘domination’ or a ‘power
mechanism’ is to invoke a particular feminist discourse around sexual penetration in
which all penetration is ‘about power’ in the most restrictive sense. Without a doubt, in
western cultural mythology men are more powerful than women, and those who sexually
penetrate are more powerful than those who are sexually penetrated. However, as
Foucault makes explicit in History of Sexuality, Volume One, the interweaving of sex and
power is not a simple matter of ‘men dominating women’. Both men and women are
enmeshed in technologies of bio-power which not only seek to elicit ‘the truth’ of their
bodies and sexualities from them but offer specific narratives of normalisation against
which these truths can be measured. Within the institutional discourses of medicine,
psychiatry and the social sciences, ‘normal’ men are undoubtedly allowed greater leeway
in terms of their desires and pleasures. Yet their positioning as ‘knowing subjects’ of
heterosex is not without its own demands and restrictions. Even when men are in a
position where they wish to, and are able to, dominate women sexually, they are
entangled within heteronormative power relations. The dominant are as enmeshed as the
dominated. They must constantly police their own behaviour, and govern themselves, in
order to maintain their ‘powerful’ appearance through a process of ‘self-formation or
autocolonisation’ which demands they adhere to codes of normativity (Dreyfus &
Rabinow 1983:186). In order to remain ‘straight’ enough to exercise the power they are
‘entitled’ to, men must constantly assess themselves in order to maintain the performance
233
of ‘masculine’ sexual desire, skill and virility, while at the same time suppressing any
signs of ‘feminine’ sexuality.
It is not the case, however, that all heterosexual men exclusively eroticise the insertive
role. Indeed, the image of a male being anally penetrated by a woman is relatively
popular in heterosexual male erotica, particularly in commercial BDSM scenarios. As
Catherine Waldby (1995) observes, the traditional psychoanalytic analysis of this line of
fantasy views the eroticised penetrating woman as a disavowal of male fear of castration,
which reinforces the centrality of his own phallic identity, and is, therefore, entirely in
keeping with hetero-norms. The hetero-penetrated man feels himself to be ‘feminised’ in
a carnivalesque act of sexual transgression which only serves to reinforce his sense of
masculine superiority. He is ‘taken like a woman’, but this is only a roleplay, a game in
which he reassures himself, through erection and ejaculation, that he is not a woman at all
(see Kaplan 1990). That this transgression takes place in what Waldby terms the utopian
‘theme-park’ environment of a commercial sex venue through a pornographic fantasy
allows him to disassociate his secretly ‘vulnerable’ pleasure from his everyday domestic
relations with his wife or girlfriend.
Writing in 1995, Waldby called for an increased feminist focus on an erotically
penetrable (as opposed to phallocentric) heterosexual male body – a call I am more than
happy to answer. I agree that it seems short-sighted for feminist theorists (and artists,
performers and writers) to follow the psychoanalytic model of heterosexuality as a
‘natural’ struggle between the imaginary spectres of the dominating, phallic, yet
threatened masculine and the dominated, castrated, yet threatening feminine, which can
234
only be resolved if one side wins and the other loses. However, as I have argued in
Chapter 4, I disagree with Waldby’s assertion that the realms of pornography and
commercial sex are entirely separate from the private domestic space of
heteronormativity.
Scenes of heterosexual male anal pleasure are certainly often seen as comic when
presented outside of the realms of pornography, yet I agree with Penley (1998) and
Kipnis (1997, 1999) that both ‘gross’ physical comedy and pornography share a certain
embodied aesthetic of male (hetero) sexuality which can be seen to oppose the normative
model of cool, controlled, masterful rationality. As Simon Astley Scholfield (1999)
demonstrates, images of erotically penetrated heterosexual males are increasingly
prevalent, from the faux ‘fisting’ scene in Austin Powers: The Spy who Shagged Me to
the seductive and ‘threatening’ gloved nurse on the cover of male heterosexual band
Blink-182’s CD titled Enema of the State.72 The image of the heterosexual male as anally
and erotically penetrable has, I believe, been popularised by discussions in men’s and
women’s magazines which tout the prostate gland as ‘the male G-spot’. This view of
male anal eroticism was reflected in several discussions among housemates Sahra,
Nathan, Marty and Keiren on Big Brother Two: Uncut (2002). The aggressively hetero-
masculine housemate Aaron also revealed a fondness for receptive oral-anal stimulation
which had led him to habitually shave around his anus and scrotum.73 These examples
suggest that the increasing public discussion of receptive heterosexual male anal 72 Schofield’s article documents various popular and erotic/artistic images of men being anally penetrated with strap-ons etc, but is most explicitly concerned with the queer figure of the man fisted by a woman. See also Dowsett (1996). 73 Aaron revealed his 'Naired crack' to housemates in a literal sense – he flashed at his fellow housemates. The blokey ex-Navy chef was wearing a cowboy suit at the time, and presented quite a spectacle of blurring the boundaries between 'hetero' and 'homo' masculine eroticisms.
235
eroticism is most prevalent among younger men (roughly, those under 40) who are
familiar with the more ‘feminised’ media formats discussed above. They also suggest that
young heterosexual men may deploy similar strategies to those young gay men use to
cope with their ambivalences and anxieties around their desire for penetration.74
Although anal intercourse is popularly assumed to be the central form of gay male sex,
many gay men do not practise it at all, and, among those who do, it can provoke anxiety
around sex and gender roles. As Anne-Lise Middlethon (2002) observes, young gay men
who desire the receptive role in anal intercourse are often disturbed by their desire
because they have been raised to accept prevailing discourses of essential male activity
and female passivity. The young gay men Middlethon interviewed therefore had to
develop strategies as a means of “either resolving their conflicts or learning to live
creatively with antagonistic impulses and images” (2002: 182). Among various strategies
which included “the careful selection of partner” and “position”, Middlethon’s
interviewees also reframed receptive anal intercourse as ‘natural’ by foregrounding the
pleasurable stimulation of the prostate rather than the ‘feminine’ and therefore shameful
pleasure of sexual passivity (2002:182). I surmise that popular mainstream/heterosexual
media discussions of the prostate as male G-spot allow young heterosexual men to
reframe their desire for penetration in a similar fashion.75 It is also possible to suppose
74 I personally corresponded with a 20-something journalist from FHM magazine who exhibited just this ambivalence in seeking not only an interview about the practice, but a physical demonstration. He had been referred to me via Carol Queen (star of the Bend over Boyfriend series) as an Australian equivalent to her erotic manifestation of expertise. 75 The suggestion that the prostate is analogous with the G-spot presents an interesting reversal of the classic medical explanations of female biology and pleasure according to a 'normalised' male biology and response. Where it was once suggested by biologists (and Freud) that the female clitoris could be understood as an 'immature' penis, here one sees an expanded capacity for pleasure being explained according to a female model.
236
that the prostate, with its functional link to the process of ejaculation, forms a kind of
‘bridge’ between anal pleasure and penile pleasure, so that the pleasures of anal
penetration can be in some way attributed to the ‘active’ experience of erection and
ejaculation. While this strategy could be figured negatively, as a rejection of femininity, it
could also be seen as acceptance of sexual proximity. Just as it seems to me to be self-
defeating to reject the potential pleasures of G-spot stimulation because heterosexual
women are now supposed to prefer clitoral stimulation to the ‘passivity’ of penetration, it
seems ridiculous to claim that men should experience their erotic pleasure as emanating
from any one particular zone. After all, who is to say whether the pleasures of the
prostate are ‘naturally’ located in the anus or the penis – we have not seen the blueprints.
Making a man of her
The ‘naturalising’ of male anal receptivity, however, is not as easily translatable to
female anal receptivity. Even when female vaginal receptivity is deemed acceptable (I
would suggest the ‘discovery’ of G-spot has helped with this), according to political,
medical, legal or religious rationales, active, desiring female anal receptivity is quite
shocking. As Sedgwick puts it, “one of the few topoi in which the female anus ever
becomes sexually visible is that of a woman’s ‘being used as a man’, as an anally
receptive man, or a man who is being raped” (1994: 204). Thus, the Cleo interviewee
‘questions the sexuality’ of an allegedly heterosexual man who desires even the insertive
role in anal intercourse76. The inference here is that a man who desires anal intercourse is
gay, or bisexual, an inference which had certain specific implications for the readers of
237
women’s magazines prior to the early 1990s (although, as I will demonstrate, these
implications have changed since the production of The Only Safe sex Guide You’ll Ever
Need). As Saywell and Pittman observe, in the late 1980s and early 1990s bisexual men
where characterised by women’s magazines as a threat to heterosexual women, due to
their ‘high risk’ of HIV infection and transmission. Further, it was assumed that bisexual
men were “the vehicles for moving the virus between the homosexual community ... and
the general population, which [included] the reader” (1996: 55). A desire for anal sex
could therefore be read as the indicator of a dangerous and questionable sexual partner.
The practice which is seen to feminise the penetrated man paradoxically masculinises the
penetrated woman, by making her an unknowing or unwilling substitute for a gay man.
As Dollimore (1990) suggests, sexual ‘perversities’ such as anal intercourse always have
this paradoxical element, in that they focus attention precisely on that which dominant
structures “simultaneously contain and exclude” where that which is excluded, and
although disavowed, always threatens to return, and effect “an undoing, a transformation”
(1990: 33). In his discussion of D.H. Lawrence’s description of heterosexual anal sex in
Lady Chatterley’s Lover, Dollimore demonstrates the difficulties of categorising anal sex
as hetero or homo in light of passages such as the following, which Dollimore describes
as “at once blindingly heterosexist and desperately homoerotic” (1990: 274, original
emphasis):
She had to be a passive, consenting thing, like a slave, a physical slave ...
She would have thought a woman would have died of shame. Instead of
which, the shame died ... There was nothing left to disguise or be ashamed
238
of ... But it took some getting at, the core of the physical jungle, the dark
and deepest recess of organic shame. The phallus alone could explore it.
And how he had pressed it on her (quoted in Dollimore 1990: 274).
It may be that Lawrence displaced his own desire to be anally penetrated onto his female
characters. However, his descriptions of Lady Chatterley’s receptive vaginal ecstasy has
been criticised by feminist writers such as Kate Millett, not as homoeroticism but as
examples of patriarchal propaganda designed to romanticise compulsory
heterosexuality.77 Dollimore does not provide any examples of vaginal sex to testify to
Lawrence’s homoerotic impulses; instead, he seems to suggest that the passage is
homoerotic because the woman is being penetrated anally. What is both excluded and
contained (by Dollimore in this instance) is the possibility of (heterosexual) female anal
eroticism and pleasure.
As Dollimore puts it, “the proximate is often constructed as the other, and in a process
which facilitates displacement. But the proximate is also what enables a tracking-back of
the ‘other’ into the ‘same”’ (1990:33). In the case of anal intercourse, ‘anus’ is revealed
as proximate to both ‘penis’ and ‘vagina’, to the extent that the sameness of the male and
female anus (or the prostate and the G-spot) can confuse the categories of sex and gender.
‘Gay’ is revealed as proximate to ‘straight’, just as ‘wife and mother’ is revealed as
proximate to ‘slut’. It is this proximity that can, I believe, be foregrounded in forms of
popular media and education that seek to advance ethical heterosexualities.
77 For arguments regarding male authors’ narration of female character's pleasure see Kappeler, Susanne, The Pornography of Representation, Polity, Cambridge, 1986, also Dworkin, Andrea Pornography.: Men Possessing Women, The Women's Press, London, 1982
239
Chapter 7
Conclusion: queer learning and ethical heterosex
In those circles where queerness has been most cultivated, the ground rule is
that one doesn’t pretend to be above the indignity of sex. And although this
usually isn’t announced as an ethical vision, that’s what it perversely is. In
queer circles you are likely to be teased and abused until you get the idea.
Sex is understood to be as various as the people who have it (Michael
Warner 1999: 35).
From DIY webcamming to commercial pornography, there is abundant visible evidence
of the queering of heterosexuality. It is one thing to think differently about pornography,
or to try to conceive of heterosex in terms of ethics rather than morals. It is quite another
to recommend practical application for these reconceptions. On the one hand, I
wholeheartedly believe that sexual thoughts and practices are valuable in and of
themselves, and need not have any other useful function than to provide pleasure. On the
other, I believe that rethinking sex and pleasure can perform practical social functions in
terms of safer sex and anti-violence education.
In my discussion of educational campaigns that follows, I do not mean to imply that
popular cultural texts are only ‘educational’ when they are produced by community
240
activists and feminist educators; or consumed in a classroom setting where they can be
‘deconstructed’. My aim throughout this thesis has been to demonstrate that the practice
of self-reflection that forms an essential component of the ethical sensibility can be
assisted by texts that are primarily designed to facilitate arousal, entertainment or
relaxation. If these texts destabilise or call into question moral certainties or fixed
identities (as I believe many do), then they may serve as triggers for affective responses
that can lead to shifts of subjectivity, and micropolitical change. As Connolly puts it, “to
reach ‘beyond’ the politics of good and evil is not to liquidate ethics but to become
ashamed of the trancendentalisation of conventional morality” (1993: 366). As I have
argued in Chapters 5 and 6, sexually explicit media, particularly pornography, is a key
site where moral certainties and idealised sex/gender identifications can become
destabilised, and shame serves a crucial role in this recognition of messy, unstable
boundaries between man/woman and hetero/homo. The negotiation of this shame (or,
more precisely, the affective pairing of shame-excitement) can be a site of ethical
learning, since it intrinsically requires an awareness of the relationship between the
interested, excited ‘self’ and the interesting, exciting ‘other’.
Given that pornographic texts directly represent the negotiation of the shame/excitement
pairing, it makes sense to think carefully about the ways that the negotiation of shame is
modelled or depicted within them, and to utilise porn scenarios that model ethical
interactions (care of the self and care of others) for political ends. British activist Anne
Philpott launched her ‘Pleasure Project’ at the XIV International AIDS conference in
Barcelona in 2002. Philpott works as a consultant with pornographic film producers in
the UK to incorporate eroticised use of condoms into heterosexual film (with limited
241
success at this point, although she was nominated for a prize in the UK sex industry’s
Erotic Awards’ Campaigner of the Year in 2005). In Philpott’s words:
It is very rare for pornstars to use barrier methods, and the ones that I
worked with were nervous about it … They don’t seem to worry about
having sex in front of 30 people in a studio, but they were worried about
putting the condom on wrongly or losing their erection. In the end, though,
they were really keen to help to put the message across (quoted in Naish
2005).
Philpott began her campaigning after noticing that the female condom, or Femidom
(which she was then marketing in the UK), was being promoted quite differently in
different countries. While western countries promoted the Femidom as inconvenient but
safer (i.e. emphasised sexual danger), health educators in India promoted the Femidom as
a kind of sex toy, and drew on local ‘sexual stories’ that eroticised the stimulating effects
of inserting the condom as part of sex play, and the sensations offered by the inner ring of
the condom as it rubbed on the end of the penis during penetration. Philpott’s aim is to
develop a kind of ‘seal of approval’ for erotic media produced in the UK so that, as she
puts it, “we can declare people ‘pleasure-proficient’ in incorporating condoms into erotic
films, books and other materials” (Naish 2005).
Feminist opposition to pornography and other forms of sexually explicit media has
tended to approach discussions of sexual pleasure as if they were (at best) peripheral to
the ‘real’ issues of contemporary sexuality: that is sexual violence, sexual coercion, and
sex that leads to unwanted pregnancies or sexually transmitted infections. Yet discussions
242
of the dangers and pleasures of sexuality need not be mutually exclusive, nor do all
ethical engagements with popular sexual media need to be ‘positive’. For example, Annie
Sprinkle’s performance and writing on her life as a sex worker (particularly from the late
1990s onward) has incorporated a critique of the elements of sex work that she found
damaging. For example, in her short letter to her colleagues at the controversial San
Francisco performance space ‘848’, Sprinkle writes:
Until recently it seemed important to be wholeheartedly ‘sex positive’, to
defend and encourage all getting paid for sex, all group sex, etc … yes, I had
a lot of fun, gave and received a lot of pleasure, and had a lot of great
orgasms, but I have also come to see that I was sometimes quite naïve, very
immature and in denial about a lot of things. I’m realising that some of the
porn, prostitution, S/M and group sex I had in the name of love and sex
positivism wasn’t all that ‘healing and enlightening’, but, on occasion,
abusive toward myself and others … It is so precious to have a place to
speak out about, and perform about, our ‘mistakes’, doubts, hurts, angers,
fears, bullshit and dislikes, and feel free to be negative about all the stuff
we’ve been so busy defending. How precious to have a place that is so sex
positive that we can be ‘negative’ (Sprinkle 2001: 79).
A non-moralistic framework that does not insist on normalising sexuality allows space
for feminist activism that accepts contradictions and understands disgust, shame and
ambivalence as productive aspects of sexual learning. In other words, it allows for
activism around heterosex that frames sex for men and women as a source of both
243
pleasure and danger. In the introduction to her book The Survivors Guide to Sex, educator
Staci Haines reflects on the difficulties she experienced in framing sexuality as a matter
of both/and rather than either/or:
As manager of Good Vibrations … I found myself caught between two
worlds: the world of survivors, hurt and sometimes paranoid about sex, and
the world of sex-positive educators, many of whom did not want to know
about the negative uses of sex or the effects of sexual abuse (Haines 1999:
xviii).
In her book, and the DVD she produced with Jackie Strano and Shar Rednour of SIR,
Haines represents her work as a place to “talk about all of it: sex, sexual abuse, rape and
its effects on sex, and the glory and healing powers of consensual adult sexuality and
embodiment” (Haines 1999: xviii). Like The Ethical Slut and Carol Queen’s
Exhibitionism for the Shy (1995), The Survivors Guide to Sex presents a model of sexual
health and sexual learning that is bounded by ethical sensibilities and incorporates
“’yes, nos and maybes’ rather than ‘dos and don’ts”78.
A non-moralistic framework can, as I have argued, incorporate existing aspects of
heterosexual cultures such as pornography, popular films and magazines. An
acknowledgment of the ways men and women are currently producing and consuming
these materials in everyday contexts can create opportunities for forms of sexual activism
that incorporate ethics and erotics rather than warnings and prohibitions. In addition, the
78 I should note here that a friend who borrowed my copy of this book found that the lack of prescriptive guidelines was a drawback, rather than an advantage.
244
explicitness and humour of these everyday texts can be engaged with in ways that
demonstrate that educators and activists are themselves open to change and sexual
learning.79
As Moira Carmody has argued, feminist anti-violence education since the 1970s has
tended to enforce the ‘no means no’ message by proscribing particular kinds of sexual
encounters and activities. Education about how to avoid sexual violence aimed at women
often focuses on the need to communicate more explicitly with their potential partner:
It has been demonstrated that men often misinterpret behaviour as sexual and
report feeling more justified in ignoring women’s verbal refusals and physically
coercing them to engage in sexual intercourse if women’s sexual intentions are
communicated in a nonassertive manner … Additionally, men who engage in
sexual assault often report having misinterpreted their partner’s sexual intentions
… Given these data, instruction in the use of clear and assertive communication in
dating situations may be useful in decreasing risk (Yeater & O’Donohue 1999:
769).
It is important to emphasise, however, that sexual assault is not simply a result of
‘miscommunication’ between men and women, but that men who assault women do so
because they feel they can, and because their behaviour is (in some quarters) socially
sanctioned (Flood 2004). But while anti-violence education offers many practical and
79 I am thinking here of Kate Bornstein’s writing and performance (1998), of Annie Sprinkle’s performances, videos and writing, and, in Australia, Vanessa Wagner/Tobin Saunders compassionate and humorous HIV/AIDS education. My own educator/sexpert drag persona Nurse Nancy owes a great deal to all these performers, and I have attempted to channel this spirit even when out of drag.
245
explicit examples of unethical sexual encounters, it rarely offers concrete examples of
what might constitute ethical, consensual sex. Of course, preventive education is not
likely to have a lasting impact on men who truly desire to hurt or abuse women sexually.
But for men who are confused or ambivalent about sexuality, there is a real chance that
offering positive, erotic models for ethical sexual negotiation and interaction can be
valuable.
In a climate where normative sexual scripting has tended to represent heterosexual men
as natural ‘pursuers’, and framed sexually assertive women as ‘sluts’, it is not surprising
that a there is a lot of bad sex occurring. For men and women who are ambivalent about
their own desires, unsure of what may be expected of them in a sexual encounter, afraid
of disappointing a sexual partner, or confused by their own bodies, education that
provides models for recognising and responding to verbal and non-verbal sexual cues can
be both challenging and exciting. Explicit material that encourages an erotics of ‘sexual
learning’ can open up space for non-normative sexual practices and ethical sexual
relationships. A queerer, ethical sensibility of heterosex emphasises both self-care and
care for one’s sexual partner(s) as part of an erotic encounter.
As Dowsett (1993) and Flood (2003) have observed, safer sex education targeting
heterosexuals has been hamstrung by conceptual frameworks that de-emphasise
heterosexual eroticism. I have argued previously that the most popular public discourses
of heterosexuality are those of disembodied ‘expertise’ on one hand and eroticised
‘experience’ on the other. While producers of ‘educational’ or ‘documentary’ porn have
embraced the role of ‘expert’, the producers of safer-sex and anti-violence promotional
246
media have been leery of identifying with the prevalent discourses of popular erotica. I
attribute this to a number of factors. Firstly, heterosexuals are rarely addressed in the
contexts of specific subcultures, or even in terms that recognise the specificities of
different cultural factors, such as education level. Consequently, education aimed at the
‘heterosexual community’ had tended to adopt a scattergun approach in which the only
specific groups to be identified are broadly identified as being particularly high-risk (e.g.
‘youth’). Secondly, there is a justifiable concern among educators and social marketers
that sexually explicit materials may be restricted or even censored, and future funding
jeopardised, if complaints are made about the tone or content of the resource material.
Thirdly, and most central for my purposes, there seems to be a resistance to promoting
sexually explicit educational material that evokes the form or content of heterosexual
pornography, for fear that these materials may intensify men’s investments in what are
deemed to be ‘patriarchal’ models of sexuality (Flood 2003). However, I would argue
that, given that discourses within both commercial and non-commercial sex media are
already demonstrating real shifts in the representation of gender and sexual practices, it
makes sense to take up the opportunity offered by these changes.
Writing in 1993, Gary Dowsett argued that the key to effective safer sex education for
heterosexual men and women lay in:
Finding a way to use pro-sex approaches quickly, approaches that actually
validate aspects of heterosexual masculinity. I say ‘quickly’ because there is
little time, in the face of the [HIV] epidemic for indulging in angst about
(hetero) sexual politics (1993: 704).
247
In 2005, after almost a decade without any national campaigns promoting safer sex for
heterosexuals, the NSW Department of Health developed the Safe Sex: No Regrets
television campaign. This campaign was indeed pro-sex, depicting young people dancing
and socialising, with captions that implied that casual sex and ‘picking up’ would not be
occasions for regret if condoms were ‘picked up’ as well. This was, however, a general
television and print campaign, designed to appeal to every heterosexual 16 to 30-year-old
(although special alternative ads were produced for heterosexual kooris, and gay men).
There would have been many heterosexuals who did not feel addressed by these ads.
And, of course, 30-second advertising spots and brochures are only one form of
education.
It may seem here that my focus is on actual production and distribution of media texts,
yet I am only interested in these texts in so far as they intersect with the other popular
discourses of heterosex. Media texts, as I have already argued, can challenge
heteronormativity while acknowledging the pleasure promised in heterosexual
encounters, but they do not provide the only framework for offering these challenges. At
present, the best models for these kinds of projects are found in edu-porn and gay men’s
peer-sex education. However, the spirit, if not the actual form, of these models is
transferable to work with heterosexuals – even those heterosexual men who could be seen
as among the most intractable footsoldiers of heterosexism.
As Kristin Mitchell and Kay Wellings have observed, “lack of clear communication on a
date may put young people at risk of having sex that is unwanted, unanticipated or
regretted. Failure to negotiate safer sex, may put young people at risk of STD/HIV
248
infection and unintended pregnancies” (2002: 393). Mitchell and Wellings note that such
difficulties have been variously ascribed to a gendered power imbalance between young
men and women, women’s concern regarding their sexual reputation, and the lack of a
‘discourse of desire’ for young women. They also note, however, that there are many
cases in which participants in a sexual encounter may be ambivalent about the encounter
itself, and simply not know exactly what it is they want (Mitchell & Wellings 2002: 394).
The issue of uncertainty is obviously not unique to young people, but, as Mitchell and
Wellings observe, inexperience can heighten anxiety around sexual uncertainty. Yet, as
Carmody (2005) has argued, educators seeking to promote sexual communication and
prevent unsafe or violent or coercive sexual encounters have tended to favour moral
models for sexual negotiation that emphasise the don’ts of sexuality rather than the dos.
These models privilege rational decision-making and articulate question-and-answer style
verbal negotiation. For example, the Antioch College code requires that sexual partners
cannot be deemed to consent to sex if they are affected by drugs or alcohol, and that
separate verbal assent be requested and gained for each individual sexual contact during
an encounter. Within the code:
‘Consent’ is defined as the act of willingly and verbally agreeing to engage
in specific sexual conduct. Previously agreed upon forms of non-verbal
communication are appropriate methods for expressing consent. In order for
‘consent’ to be valid, all parties must have unimpaired judgement and a
shared understanding of the nature of the act to which they are consenting
including safer sex practices. The person who initiates sexual conduct is
responsible for verbally asking for the ‘consent’ of the individual(s)
249
involved. ‘Consent’ must be obtained with each new level of sexual
conduct. The person with whom sexual conduct is initiated must verbally
express ‘consent’ or lack of ‘consent’. Silence conveys a lack of consent. If
at any time consent is withdrawn, the conduct must stop immediately
(Antioch College 2002).
While this level of formality could be erotic in certain contexts (e.g. ritualised BDSM
role-play), it does not allow much space for improvisation, surprise or discovery as
element elements of consensual of sexual play. I should make it clear here that I am not
claiming, as some critics might argue, that a gendered power imbalance as played out in a
cat-and-mouse game of female sexual ‘teasing’ and male sexual ‘conquest’ is essential
for ‘real’ erotic encounters. Instead I am observing that both men and women may enjoy
a sense of vulnerability and surrender to the unknown in sexual encounters (see Segal
1990, 1994). At the same time, both men and women may enjoy the pleasure of pursuit
and seduction of a new sexual partner, or may enjoy demonstrating social and/or sexual
skills as part of this process.
I favour the more ethical (and challenging) model of sexual negotiation offered by David
McInnes and Jonathan Bollen (2002, 2004) in their theorising of ‘sexual learning’ drawn
from interviews with sexually adventurous gay men in Sydney. In their analyses of these
interviews, McInnes and Bollen draw on Tomkins’ model of affect to look at ways that
recollections of ‘doing something new’ in a sexual encounter could be recalled by
participants as potentially either ‘shameful’ (negative) or ‘surprising/exciting’
(pleasurable) depending on the context in which the event occurred. For McInnes and
250
Bollen’s interviewees, it was not the practice itself, or even the degree of negotiation, that
made the difference as to whether an event was recollected negatively or positively.
Rather, it was the way the other participant or participants in the encounter reacted to the
moment of potential shaming that seemed to have the most impact (McInnes et al 2002).
While some might argue that it is inappropriate to draw links between gay men’s
accounts of sexuality and straight men and women’s sexual encounters, I will support my
doing so on four counts. Firstly, I believe there are sufficient accounts of female
experiences of sexual agency and power in both theoretical writing and popular culture to
refute the blanket assertion that all heterosexual encounters involve a power imbalance in
men’s favour. Secondly, there is plenty of evidence to suggest that not all relations
between same-sex partners are experienced by participants (or observers) as ‘equal’.
Thirdly, detailed social research into gay men’s sexuality and sexual learning has been
consistently prioritised in the response to the HIV epidemic (in Australia at least), and
offers the richest and most productive example of applied sexual theory.
My fourth and final reason for supporting the transfer of research drawn from gay men’s
accounts of sexual interaction may be the most or the least persuasive, depending on the
reader. It is based in my own experiences of formal and informal sex talk (and actual
sexual contacts) with gay and straight men; and my knowledge of the diversity of desires
and practices that cut across the boundaries of ‘gay and straight’ or ‘male and female’. As
an example of how this model of education that privileges ethical rather than moral
frameworks for sexual negotiation can be transferred from gay to straight cultures, I will
offer a case study drawn from my own work with the National Rugby League (NRL). As
251
the findings of this research and education project have not been published (and were
conducted with an understanding of confidentiality), I am forced to either omit or skirt
around some details which I would otherwise have included. I am offering the example as
a modest demonstration of the ways that ethical (and micropolitical) reframings of
heterosex can fit into existing heterosexual spaces, and how they may be received when
this occurs.
Playing by the rules
In February 2004, media reports began to circulate of an alleged sexual assault
perpetrated by members of the Bulldogs NRL team. In the days following the original
leak, as rumours escalated that a violent gang rape had occurred, an unnamed player was
quoted in the Sun-Herald as having claimed that group sex was common within the
Rugby League culture, and in fact “the boys love a bun” (i.e. multiple men having
intercourse with one woman). The reaction from media and other commentators could
only be described as a moral panic. Interestingly, the key issue in the uproar was not
whether or not the incident in question had been consensual, but whether group sex was
ever acceptable, or if it was in fact a reprehensible, immoral act that by definition no
right-minded man or woman should ever wish to participate in.
The NRL commissioned a group of academics from University of Sydney, led by
Associate Professor Catharine Lumby and of which I was a member, to conduct a study
of the Rugby League culture. The brief of the study was broad, but the main aim was to
discover whether any aspects of the Rugby League culture initiated, supported,
encouraged or condoned the denigration, harassment or assault of women. The research
252
process was approved by the Human Ethics Committee at the University of Sydney, and
was supported by the Rugby League Players Association (the player’s union) and the
NRL Education and Welfare Committee. Through a process of interactive forums, one-
to-one interviews and anonymous questionnaires, we surveyed over 200 past and present
players. In addition, we sought the views of CEOs, administrative staff, coaching staff,
and wives and partners of players. As Research Coordinator I personally conducted
interviews with approximately 20 current players, and developed recommendations for
the education programs that were to form one element of our recommendations. Due to a
number of factors (including time constraints, and a public demand for a rapid and visible
response to the allegations) I was invited to deliver first the pilot and then a more
developed version of the education workshop on ethical sexual conduct which I had
recommended as part of the NRL’s response to the research findings.80
Having reviewed the interviews that I and my colleague Clifton Evers conducted with
current players, it was apparent that most sexual encounters that could be seen as
‘problematic’ for professional footballers were relatively similar to those of other young
men in their age group (most professional players are aged between 19 and 26). That is,
80 While it was agreed by most players who participated in the 2004 interview process that some form of education on sexual conduct should take place, they had mixed opinions as to whether this education should be formal, or informal. In addition, there was considerable disagreement as to whether education was most effectively delivered by an external consultant/facilitator, or by an older player/mentor. Some interviewees (particularly those who were senior players themselves) felt that mentoring was the best approach. Younger players were more likely to prefer an external facilitator, on the grounds that senior players might in fact be seen as too entrenched in League culture and attitudes. Given the mix of player opinions on the subject, it seems advisable to provide opportunities for both peer education and mentoring and information sessions with external educators. All players were asked whether a man or a woman would be the best ‘outsider’. Most were positive about either a woman or a male/female facilitating team. In the 2005 program I was the ‘female outsider’, but co-presented with a ‘male insider’ – NRL employee and recently retired player Michael Buettner. The combination was well-received, with 90% of evaluations rating the presenters as ‘excellent’.
253
they were initiated under the influence of alcohol and other recreational drugs, in a
nightclub or pub atmosphere. Where they differed is that they were often concluded in a
player’s hotel room, rather than at the home of one of the sexual partners, in a situation
that could be seen as taking place on the ‘player’s territory’. That is, other team members
would be at the same hotel, while the casual partner was, in most cases, unlikely to have
her friends close by during or after the sexual encounter. Some of the players I
interviewed observed that this could place casual sexual partners at a disadvantage if a
situation ‘turned bad’. Interestingly, while some players’ accounts of ‘picking up’ women
and having casual sex reflected broader cultural double standards around male and female
sexuality, others viewed their own celebrity status as ‘feminising’ in a sense. That is, they
recognised themselves as objects of desire, but also saw the negative aspects of being
sexualised (and scrutinised) in this way, in terms of potential damage to their personal
and professional reputations. They were also concerned by the possibility of unplanned
pregnancies or sexually transmitted infections that went along with multiple sexual
encounters.
Predictably, some players were most concerned with demonstrating sexual prowess (to
their partners and other observers) before and during a sexual encounter as the key factor
in a ‘good’ sexual encounter, where ‘everyone went away happy’. Interestingly, the
majority (particularly those in their early 20s and older) emphasised the importance of
what might be termed ‘aftercare’ following casual sexual encounters. Many older
interviewees observed that establishing consent and negotiating condom use with a casual
partner was relatively straightforward, especially in the context of their celebrity status
and the culture of sexually adventurous women (i.e. groupies) who were attracted to it.
254
They emphasised that it was male behaviour after sex that was most likely to cause
distress to a female partner, and to lead her to feel mistreated or abused. Some suggested
that this was particularly likely to be the case if she was coming down from a pill (i.e.
Ecstasy), or just feeling the effects of a big night’s drinking. It is here that McInnes and
Bollen’s research seems most relevant as a tool for developing what they term a
“contextually specific and culturally responsive” (in other words, ethical) education
strategy (2004: 22).
In developing a strategy for the NRL players, I drew on HIV education strategies which
recognise that casual sexual encounters are often negotiated in nightclubs, by partners
under the influence of drugs or alcohol, through a combination of verbal and non-verbal
cues. I argued that any such education strategy should be based on players’ own ‘sexual
stories’, since straight men, like gay men, have already developed strategies for
negotiating safer/consensual sex, even in ‘high-risk’ contexts (Foley 1997; Smith & Van
de Ven 2001). My reasoning was that, if casual sex was understood by the players only in
moral terms, then both they and their partners were ‘bad’. To go out with the intention of
getting drunk and picking up a casual partner for sex, with no intention of forming an
ongoing relationship, could only be experienced as potentially shaming and shameful. It
was a situation where men whose understanding of female sexuality was restricted to
oppositions of ‘good girls’ and ‘sluts’, or who felt guilt or ambivalence regarding their
own sexuality, were more likely to treat a casual partner disrespectfully, if not abusively,
in order to end the evening and therefore avoid further contact. It was essential, I argued,
to reframe these situations in ethical terms. Consequently, in the interactive workshops
that were a major part of the education strategy, I emphasised the importance of consent
255
and the necessity for verbal and non-verbal negotiation prior to sex, but concluded the
workshops by inviting participants to consider the value of aftercare and post-sex
etiquette.
This application of ethical considerations may seem fairly inconsequential in the face of
broader social inequities between men and women. Yet, for me, it was a clear example of
the micro level at which significant social change can take place. The fact that a group of
men who have been represented by some critics as the very personification of
‘hegemonic masculinity’ were willingly placing themselves in a situation where their
sexual conduct was subject to open discussion by both a ‘feminist from the University’
and their peers was, and still is, amazing to me. The combination of humorous self-
deprecation, boasting, anger, curiosity, embarrassment, pride, arousal and shame that was
evinced in the interviews and the workshops was far more complex than any macro
theory of ‘patriarchal masculinity’ could encompass. And having participated in, and
facilitated, similarly affectively charged Chin Wag workshops for people living with and
affected by HIV/AIDs since 1996, I can honestly say that the atmosphere in the straight
men’s workshops was, at times, not that different to that of the workshops involving gay
men.81 As one of my fellow researchers joked early on, footballers and gay men have a
lot in common – both groups are well known for their love of the gym, and going for
beers with the boys.
81 Chin Wag. and its precursor, Vanessa Wagner’s Wheel of Misfortune are designed as combination of comical peer-support and information for HIV-positive people and their friends. The interactive evenings are structured as ‘info-edu-tainment’, and are hosted by Vanessa Wagner/Tobin Saunders, and myself (as Nurse Nancy). The events have been facilitated at various locations around Australia by the National Association of People with AIDS (NAPWA) and the AIDS Treatment Project Australia (ATPA) since 1998.
256
These workshops were designed to emphasise (in Dollimore’s terms) the proximity of
heterosexual men and women. The structure of the workshops emphasised both
similarities and differences between sexual partners, positing heterosexual interactions
not as battles or struggles, but as pleasurable engagements that can also involve
challenges and affective responses. Within the workshop process, it was acknowledged
that idealised or moral codes of behaviour frequently need to be adapted to the contexts
and circumstances participants encounter. The content of the workshops did not provide
final or complete answers for every potential situation, but invited participants to reflect
on past actions, and shape their future sexual encounters according to these reflections.
Participants were also encouraged to develop relationships of care that extended from
themselves to both their team mates and their sexual partners.
Like Bollen and McInnes, I would like to invoke possibilities for educational strategies
that understand the ‘excessive’ or ‘transgressive’ elements of everyday sexual cultures (in
my case, mediated cultures) not as problems to be solved but as evidence of ‘extant
pedagogies’ of sexual learning (2004: 22). As I have argued, websites, magazines, self-
help manuals and pornographic videos are not simply representations of ‘good’ or ‘bad’
sex. Nor are they simply templates for sexed and gendered behaviour. Instead, they offer
reflections of cultural currents that include both radical and regressive understandings of
sex and gender. They are examples of possible sexual stories that can be tried on for size.
Increasingly, they are sites that can be contested and challenged by the audiences who
seek to produce, rather than just consume, sexually explicit media. For educators,
activists and theorists to acknowledge and work with these changes requires, as Bollen
and McInnes put it:
257
an account of adventurous sex, of moving beyond sexual limits and
developing sexual capacities, that demands consideration of how [women
and] men learn in interaction with others during sexual occasions and over
time (2004: 35).
It also requires an acknowledgement that sexual conduct, like personal
relationships, has changed considerably in response to feminism and other
influences. I have argued throughout this thesis that when feminist tools for
rethinking heteronormativity are deployed ethically, it is possible to recognise real
shifts in popular discourses of sexuality. These shifts are far from seismic, but
they are signs of real micropolitical change. While I am sure that no-one would
claim that we now live in a feminist utopia, I doubt that any feminist in North
America, the UK or Australia would deny that there have been major positive
shifts in family structures and workplace practices that have brought about
significant benefits for women. Even when these shifts have been trivialised or
commodified (e.g. in media features on ‘supermums’ and ‘having it all’), this does
not diminish the ways that feminism and queer activism has impacted on popular
discourses and practices.
If these shifts and changes can be acknowledged with all their imperfections, then we
should also be able to acknowledge the ways that feminism and queer activism have
impacted on representations of ‘public sex’. Heterosexual embodiment and sexual
practices are being represented in quite different ways than they were only 30 or so years
ago, and the changes in representations and discourses are not simply a result of clever
258
marketers co-opting ‘sexual empowerment’ in order to turn a profit.
Fewww.newmatilda.comminist and queer sex radicals have significantly altered the
context and content of sexually explicit media, but they are not the only ones who have
done so. Everyday heterosexual producers and consumers of sex media have also played
a part in reframing popular discourse to reflect their own fears and desires. As Foucault’s
model of ‘the deployment of sexuality’ demonstrates, to insist on a boundary between
‘safe’ and ‘dangerous’ forms of sexuality is to disavow the process of normalisation.
‘Outlaw’ sexuality is not the ‘other’ of the nuclear family, it is embedded within its heart
– in the sanctum of the heterosexual bedroom. Feminists who insist on drawing
moralising boundaries between ‘good’ and ‘bad’ sexualities will always find themselves
struggling with the enemy within. I prefer the ethical politics of care and curiosity which
do not presume to always know ‘the other’ or to foreclose the possibility of learning
something from ‘bad’ texts and ‘bad’ sex.
259
References
Albury, Katherine (1997) 'Homie-Erotica': Heterosexual Female Desire in The Picture'
Media International Australia, No 84, May 1997: 19-27.
Albury, Kath (2005) ‘Porno-chic, Fembots and Girly-girls’ New Matilda Issue 62
Albury, Kath (2002) Yes Means Yes: Getting Explicit About Heterosex, St Leonards:
Allen & Unwin.
Allen, Louisa (2003) ‘Girls want sex, boys want love: Resisting dominant discourses of
(hetero) sexuality’, Sexualities, 6(2): 215-36.
Anapol, Deborah M. (1997) Polyamory: The New Love Without Limits, San Rafael:
IntiNet Resource Centre.
Antioch College (2002) Sexual Offense Prevention Policy (SOPP) www.antioch-
college.edu/community/survival_guide/policies_procedures/sopp.htm, accessed 9 August
2002.
Astley Scholfield, Simon (1999) ‘Newly desiring and desired: Queer man-fisting
woman’, M/C: A Journal of Media and Culture, 2(5),
www.uq.edu.au/mc/9907/queer.html, accessed 1 August 2002.
Bail, Kathy (ed) (1996) DIY Feminism, St Leonards: Allen & Unwin.
260
Barbach, Lonnie (1976) For Yourself: The Fulfilment of Female Sexuality, New York:
Doubleday.
Barcan, Ruth (2000) ‘Home on the rage: Nudity, celebrity, and ordinariness in the Home
Girls/Blokes pages’, Continuum, 14:2: 145-58.
Barcan, Ruth (2002) ‘In the raw: ‘Home-made’ porn and reality genres’, Journal of
Mundane Behaviour, 3.1, February,
http://mundanebehaviour.org/issues/v3n1/barcan.htm, accessed 20 May 2002.
Barker, Paul (1996) ‘The rise of camcorder culture’, in Kevin McDonald & Mark
Cousins (eds) The Faber Book of Documentary, London: Faber & Faber.
Bashford, Kerry (1993) (ed) Kink Sydney: Wicked Women Publications.
Bell, David (1995) ‘Perverse dynamics, sexual citizenship and the transformation of
intimacy’, in D. Bell & G. Valentine (eds) Mapping Desire, London and New York:
Routledge: 304-17.
Bell, David & Valentine, Gill (eds) (1995) Mapping Desire: Geographies of Sexualities,
London: Routledge.
Bell, Shannon (1991) ‘Feminist ejaculations’, in Arthur Kroker & Marilouise Kroker
(eds) The Hysterical Male: New Feminist Theory, New York: St Martins Press: 155-69.
Bennett, Jane (1996) ‘How is it, then, that we still remain barbarians?: Foucault, Schiller,
and the aestheticization of ethics’, Political Theory, Vol 24 (4), November: 653-72.
261
Berger, John (1972) Ways of Seeing, London: Penguin.
Bersani, Leo (1988) ‘Is the rectum a grave?’, in D. Crimp (ed) AIDS: Cultural Analysis,
Cultural Activism, Cambridge: MIT Press.
Bernauer, James W. (1988) ‘Michel Foucault’s ecstatic thinking’, in J. Bernauer & D.
Rasmussen (eds) The Final Foucault, Cambridge: MIT Press.
Bland, Lucy (1983) ‘Purity, motherhood, pleasure or threat? Definitions of female
sexuality 1900-1970s’, in S. Cartledge & J. Ryan (eds) Sex and Love: New Thoughts on
Old Contradictions, London: The Women’s Press.
Bland, Lucy and Mort, Frank (1997) ‘Thinking Sex Historically’ in Lynne Segal (ed)
New Sexual Agendas London: Macmillan.
Black, Joel (2002) The Reality Effect: Film Culture and the Graphic Imperative, New
York and London: Routledge.
Bollen, Jonathan & McInnes, David (2004) ‘Time, relations and learning in gay men’s
experiences of adventurous sex’, Social Semiotics, Vol 14, No 1: 21-36.
Bordo, Susan (1994) ‘Reading the male body’, in L. Goldstein (ed) The Male Body:
Features, Destinies, Exposures, Michigan: University of Michigan Press.
Bowers, Keith (2004) ‘Bendover Boyfriend 2: Less talkin’ more rockin’, The Spectator
Online, www.spectator.net/EDPAGES/bendovr2.html, accessed 15 October 2004.
262
Bright, Susie (1992) Susie Bright’s Sexual Reality: A Virtual Sex World Reader,
Pittsburgh/San Francisco: Cleis Press.
Bright, Susie (1998) ‘Backdoormania’, Salon Magazine,
salonmagazine.com/col/27/brig.html/anal, accessed 13 May 1998.
Bright, Susie (2005a) ‘Andrea Dworkin has died’, Susie Bright’s Journal
http://susiebright.blogs.com/susie_brights_journal_/2005/04/andrea_dworkin_.html,
accessed 11 April 2005.
Bright, Susie (2005b) ‘Female chauvinist pigs at the trough’, Susie Bright’s Journal
http://susiebright.blogs.com/susie_brights_journal_/2005/09/female_chauvini.html,
accessed October 1 2005
Brown, Wendy (1995) States of Injury: Power and Freedom in Late Modernity,
Princeton: Princeton University Press.
Buchbinder, David (1994) Masculinities and Identities, Melbourne: Melbourne
University Press.
Burgmann, Verity (2003) Power, Profit and Protest: Australian Social Movements and
Globalisation, St Leonards: Allen & Unwin.
Butler, Heather (2004) ‘What do you call a lesbian with long fingers? The development
of lesbian and dyke pornography’, in L. Williams (ed) Porn Studies, Durham: Duke
University Press.
263
Butler, Judith (1990) Gender Trouble: Feminism and The Subversion of Identity, New
York/London: Routledge.
Butler, Judith (1993) Bodies That Matter: On The Discursive Limits of ‘Sex’, New
York/London: Routledge.
Bornstein, Kate (1998) My Gender Workbook: how to become a real man, a real woman,
the real you, or something else entirely, New York: Routledge.
Califia, Pat (1994) Public Sex: The Culture of Radical Sex, Pittsburgh/San Francisco:
Cleis Press.
Califia Pat (1987) ‘A Personal View of the Lesbian S/M Community and Movement in
San Francisco’ in Coming to Power: Writings and graphics on lesbian S/M Samois (eds)
Boston: Alyson Press.
Califia Pat (2002) Speaking Sex to Power: The Politics of Queer Sex, San Francisco:
Cleis Press.
Cameron, Alison (2002) ‘Porno chic’, Sunday Life: The Sun Herald Magazine, 2 June:
23.
Carabine, Jean (1996) ‘Heterosexuality and social policy’, in D. Richardson (ed)
Theorising Heterosexuality, London, Buckingham: Open University Press.
Carmody, Moira (2003) ‘Sexual ethics and violence prevention’, Social and Legal
Studies: An International Journal, Vol 12(2): 199-216.
264
Carmody, Moira (2005) ‘Ethical erotics: rethinking anti-rape education’, Sexualities, 8
(4): 469-85.
Carol, Avedon (1993) ‘Porn, perversion and sexual ethics’, in Harwood, Oswell,
Parkinson, and Ward (eds) Pleasure Principles Politics, Sexuality and Ethics, London:
Lawrence and Wishart.
Cartledge, Sue & Ryan, Joanna (eds) (1983) Sex and Love: New Thoughts On Old
Contradictions, London: Women’s Press.
Carter, Angela (1987) The Sadeian Woman: An Exercise in Cultural History, London:
Virago.
Cobb, Lindsay (2001) ‘Tribeseekers: Maps for the Poly Frontier’ in Loving More
Number 26.
Cohan, Steven (1993) ‘Masquerading as the American male in the fifties: Picnic, William
Holden and the spectacle of masculinity in Hollywood film’, in Constance Penley &
Sharon Willis (eds) Male Trouble, Minneapolis: University of Minnesota Press.
Comfort, Alex (ed) (1989) The Joy of Sex: A Gourmet Guide to Lovemaking, Sydney:
Weldon Publishing.
Coward, Rosalind (1987) Female Desire: Women’s Sexuality Today, London: Paladin.
Connell, R.W. & Dowsett G.W. (1992) Rethinking Sex: Social Theory and Sexuality
Research, Melbourne: Melbourne University Press.
265
Connolly, William (1993) ‘Beyond good and evil: The ethical sensibility of Michel
Foucault’, Political Theory, Vol 21, 3, August: 365-89.
Connolly, William (1999) Why I Am Not a Secularist, Minneapolis: University of
Minnesota Press.
Coombs, Anne (1996) Sex and Anarchy: The Life and Death of the Sydney Push,
Ringwood: Viking.
Cox, Tracey (1998) ‘Sexsexsex’, Cosmopolitan, May.
Crabbe, Anthony (1988) ‘Feature-length sex films’, in Gary Pay & Clive Bloom (eds)
Perspectives in Pornography: Sexuality in Film and Literature, London: Macmillan.
Crossley Michelle (2001) ‘How to use a condom: Narratives, sexualities and moralities in
safer sex health promotional literature’, Culture, Health & Sexuality, 3 (3): 363-70.
de Lauretis, Teresa (1987) Technologies of Gender: Essays on Theory, Film and Fiction
Bloomington and Indianapolis: Indiana University Press.
de Lauretis, Teresa (1994) The Practice of Love: Lesbian Sexuality and Perverse Desire,
Bloomington and Indianapolis: Indiana University Press.
Dines, Gail, Jensen, Robert & Russo, Ann (1998) Pornography: The Production and
Consumption of Inequality, New York and London: Routledge.
Diprose, Rosalyn (2002) Corporeal Generosity: On Giving with Nietzsche, Merleau-
Ponty, and Levinas, New York: State University of New York Press.
266
Dodson, Betty (1987) Sex for One: The Joy of Selfloving, New York: Harmony Books.
Dollimore, Jonathan (1991) Sexual Dissidence: Augustine to Wilde, Freud to Foucault,
Oxford: Clarendon Press.
Dovey, Jon (2000) Freakshow: First Person Media and Factual Television, London:
Pluto.
Dowsett, G.W. (1993) ‘I’ll show you mine, if you show me yours: Gay men, masculinity
research, men’s studies, and sex’, Theory and Society, 22(5): 697-709.
Dowsett, G.W. (1999) ‘The indeterminate macro-social: New traps for old players in
HIV/AIDS social research’, Culture, Health and Sexuality, 1(1): 95-102.
Dworkin, Andrea (1982) Pornography: Men Possessing Women, London: Women’s
Press.
Dworkin, Andrea (1997) Intercourse, New York: Simon and Schuster.
Dubois, Ellen Carol & Gordon, Linda (1992) ‘Seeking ecstasy on the battlefield: Danger
and pleasure in nineteenth-century feminist sexual thought’, in Carole S. Vance (ed)
Pleasure and Danger: Exploring Female Sexuality, London: Pandora.
Dyer, Richard (1992) ‘Don’t look now: The male pin-up’ in Mandy Merck (ed) The
Sexual Subject: A Screen Reader in Sexuality, London: Screen.
Easton, Dossie & Liszt, Catherine A. (1997) The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual
Possibilities, San Francisco: Greenery Press.
267
Echols, Alice (1983) ‘The New Feminism of Yin and Yang’ in A. Snitow, C. Stansell and
S. Thompson (eds) Desire: The Politics of Sexuality London: Virago.
Echols, Alice (1992) ‘The taming of the id: Feminist sexual politics, 1968-83’, in Carole
S. Vance (ed) Pleasure and Danger: Exploring Female Sexuality, London: Pandora.
Ehrenreich, Barbara (1983) The Hearts of Men: American Dreams and the Flight from
Commitment New York: Anchor.
Ehrenreich, B., Hess, E. & Jacobs, G. (1986) Re-making Love: The Feminization of Sex,
New York: Doubleday.
Ellis, John (1992) ‘On pornography’ in Mandy Merck (ed) The Sexual Subject: A Screen
Reader in Sexuality, London: Screen.
Epstein, Barbara (1983) ‘Family, Sexual Morality, and Popular Movements in Turn-of-
the-Century America A. Snitow, C. Stansell and S. Thompson (eds) Desire: The Politics
of Sexuality London: Virago.
Faderman, Lillian (1980) Surpassing The Love of Men, New York: Morrow.
Firefox, LaSara (2001) ‘Finally! Real lesbian porn balls to the wall – pedal to the metal’,
www.spectator.net/EDPAGES/hardlove2.html, accessed 10 July 2002.
Firestone, Shulamith (2003) The Dialectic of Sex: The Case For Feminist Revolution.
New York: Farrar, Strauss and Giroux (first published 1970).
268
Flood, Michael (2003) ‘Addressing the sexual cultures of heterosexual men: Key
strategies in involving men and boys in HIV/AIDS prevention’; paper prepared for
United Nations Development Program (UNDP) Expert Group Meeting on ‘The role of
men and boys in achieving gender equality’, 21-24 October, Brasilia, Brazil.
Flood, M. (2004) ‘Changing men: Best practice in violence prevention work with men’,
Home Truths Conference: Stop Sexual Assault and Domestic Violence: A National
Challenge, Melbourne, 15-17 September.
Frances, Eric (2001) ‘Organic love: An ecology of sustainable relationships’,
www.planetwaves.net/OrganicLove.html,accessed 30 October 2001.
Friday, Nancy (1974) My Secret Garden: Women’s Sexual Fantasies, New York: Pocket
Books.
Freud, Sigmund (1979), ‘Three Essays on Sexuality’ in J. Strachey (ed) The Standard
Complete Works of Sigmund Freud, Volume Seven, Middlesex: Penguin.
Foucault, Michel (1980) ‘Power and Strategies’, in Colin Gordon (ed) Power/Knowledge:
Selected Interviews and other writings 1972-1977, New York: Pantheon.
Foucault, Michel (1983) ‘Afterword: The Subject and Power’, in Hubert L. Dreyfus &
Paul Rabinow (eds) Michel Foucault: Beyond Structuralism and Hermanuetics, Chicago,
IL: University of Chicago Press.
Foucault, Michel (1986) The Care of the Self: The History of Sexuality Volume Three,
London: Penguin.
269
Foucault, Michel (1990a) The History of Sexuality, Volume One, An Introduction, New
York: Vintage Books.
Foucault, Michel (1990b) The Use of Pleasure: The History of Sexuality Volume Two,
New York: Vintage Books.
Foucault, Michel (1997) Ethics: Subjectivity and Truth, Paul Rabinow (ed), New York:
The New Press.
Gamson, Joshua (1998) Freaks Talk Back: Tabloid Talk Shows and Sexual
Nonconformity, Chicago and London: University of Chicago Press.
Gamson, Joshua (2003) ‘Reflections on Queer Theory and Communication’ Journal of
Homosexuality Vol 45 (2/3/4)
Galvin, Nick (2003) ‘The pornstar next door’, Sydney Morning Herald, 10 January: 27.
Gavey, N, McPhillips K & Braun, V (1999) ‘Interruptus coitus: Heterosexuals accounting
for intercourse’, Sexualities, Vol 2(1): 35-68.
Gibson, P.C. & Gibson, R. (eds) (1993) Dirty Looks: Women, Pornography, Power,
London: British Film Institute Publishing.
Giddens, Anthony (1991) Modernity and Self-Identity: Self and Society in the Late
Modern Age, Cambridge: Polity Press.
Giddens, Anthony (1992) The Transformation of Intimacy: Sexuality, Love and Intimacy
in Modern Societies, Cambridge: Polity Press.
270
Gillan, Garth (1988) ‘Foucault’s philosophy’, in J. Bernauer and D. Rasmussen (eds) The
Final Foucault, Cambridge: MIT Press.
Goldberg, Michelle (2001) ‘Feminism for sale’, AlterNet
www.alternet.org/print.html?StoryID=10306, accessed 4 May 2002.
Golding, Sue (1993) ‘Sexual manners’, in Harwood et al (eds) Pleasure Principles
Politics, Sexuality and Ethics, London: Lawrence and Wishart.
Goldsmith, Michelle (1995) Painful Sex: A Guide to Causes, Preventions and
Treatments, London: Thorsons.
Gott, Ted (1997) ‘Sex and the Single T-cell: the taboo of HIV-positive sexuality in
Australian art and culture’ in Jill Julius Matthews (ed) Sex in Public: Australian Sexual
Cultures, St Leonards: Allen & Unwin.
Greer, Germaine (1997) ‘In his image’, Sydney Morning Herald, 16 October: 15.
Greer, Germaine (1999) The Whole Woman, London: Doubleday.
Grosz, Elizabeth (1995) Volatile Bodies: Towards a Corporeal Feminism St Leonards:
Allen & Unwin.
Haines, Staci (1999) The Survivor’s Guide To Sex: How to Have an Empowered Sex Life
After Child Sexual Abuse, San Francisco: Cleis Press.
Halperin, David (1997) Saint Foucault: Towards a Gay Hagiography, New York: Oxford
University Press.
271
Hamblin, Angela (1983) ‘Is a feminist heterosexuality possible?’, in S. Cartledge & J.
Ryan (eds) Sex and Love: New Thoughts on Old Contradictions, London: Women’s
Press.
Hansen, Christine, Needham, Catherine & Nichols, Bill (1991) ‘Pornography,
ethnography and discourses of power’, in Bill Nichols (ed) Representing Reality: Issues
and Concepts in Documentary, Bloomington and Indianapolis: Indiana University Press.
Hardy, C. Moore (1997) ‘Lesbian erotica and impossible images’ in Jill Julius Matthews
(ed) Sex in Public: Australian Sexual Cultures, St Leonards: Allen & Unwin
Hardy, Simon (2000) ‘Feminist iconoclasm and the problem of eroticism’, Sexualities,
3(1): 77-96.
Hartley, John (1990) The Politics of Pictures: The Creation of the Public in the Age of
Popular Media, London and New York: Routledge.
Hartley, John (1996) Popular Reality: Journalism, Modernity, Popular Culture, London:
Arnold.
Hartley, Nina (1997) ‘In the flesh: A pornstar’s journey’, in Jill Nagle (ed) Whores and
Other Feminists, London and New York: Routledge.
Heath, Stephen (1982) The Sexual Fix, London/Basingstoke: Macmillan Press.
Hebdidge, Dick (1979) Subculture: The Meaning of Style, London: Methuen.
272
Heidenry, John (1997) What Wild Ecstasy: The Rise and Fall of the Sexual Revolution,
Kew: William Heinemann Australia.
Hight, Craig (2001) ‘Webcam sites: The documentary genre moves online?’ Media
International Australia, Incorporating Culture and Policy, No 100, August: 81-93.
Hillyer, Minette (2004) ‘Sex in the Suburban: Porn, Home Movies, and the Live Action
Performance of Love in Pam and Tommy Lee: Hardcore and Uncensored in Linda
Williams (ed) Porn Studies, Durham/London: Duke University Press.
Hite, Shere (1976) The Hite Report, New York: Macmillan.
Hollibaugh, Amber & Moraga, Cherrie (1983) ‘What we’re rollin around in bed with:
Sexual silences in feminism’, in Anne Snitow, Christine Stansell, and Sharon Thompson
(eds) Powers of Desire: The Politics of Sexuality, New York: Monthly Review Press.
Hurley, Michael (2001) 'Sydney’, in C. Johnston and P. Van Reyk (eds) Queer City: Gay
and Lesbian Politics in Sydney, Annandale: Pluto Press
Irvine, Janice (1990) Disorders of Desire: Sex and Gender in Modern American
Sexology, Philadelphia: Temple University Press.
Jackson, Stevi (1997) ‘Heterosexuality and feminist theory’, in Diane Richardson (ed)
Theorising Heterosexuality, Buckingham/Philadelphia: Open University Press.
Jeffreys, Sheila (1993) Anticlimax: A Feminist Perspective on the Sexual Revolution,
London: The Women’s Press.
273
Jeffreys, Sheila (1997) ‘Heterosexuality and the desire for gender’, in Diane Richardson
(ed) Theorising Heterosexuality, Buckingham/Philadelphia: Open University Press.
Jeffreys, Sheila (2005) Beauty and Misogyny: Harmful Cultural Practices In The West,
London: Routledge.
Juffer, Jane (1998) At Home with Pornography: Women, Sex and Everyday Life, New
York and London: New York University Press.
Juno, A. & Vale, V, (eds) (1992) Angry Women, San Francisco: Re/Search Publications.
Kaite, Berkeley (1995) Pornography and Difference, Bloomington and Indianapolis:
Indianapolis University Press.
Kaldera, Raven (2005) Pagan Polyamory: Becoming a Tribe of Hearts, Woodbury:
Llewellyn.
Kaplan, Louise J. (1991) Female Perversions: The Temptations of Madame Bovary, New
York: Doubleday.
Kappeler, Susanne (1986) The Pornography of Representation, Cambridge: Polity Press.
Kapsalis, Terri (1997) Public Privates: Performing Gynecology from Both Ends of the
Speculum, Durham and London: Duke University Press.
Karp, Marcelle & Stoller, Debbie (1999) The BUST Guide to the New Girl Order, New
York: Penguin.
274
Kibby, Marjorie & Costello, Brigid (1999) ‘Displaying the phallus: Masculinity and the
performance of sexuality on the Internet’,
www.newcastle.edu.au/discipline/sociolanthrop/staff/kibbymarj/maledisp.html, accessed
5 April 2005.
Kibby, Marjorie & Costello, Brigid (2001) ‘Between the image and the act: Interactive
sex entertainment on the Internet’, Sexualities, 4(3): 353-69.
Kipnis, Laura (1992) ‘(Male) desire and (female) disgust: Reading Hustler’, in Lawrence
Grossberg, Cary Nelson and Paula Treichler (eds) Cultural Studies, London: Routledge.
Kipnis, Laura (1999) Bound and Gagged: Pornography and the Politics of Fantasy in
America, Durham: Duke University Press.
Kippax, Sue, June Crawford, Cathy Waldby and Pam Benton (1990) ‘Women
negotiating heterosex: Implications for AIDS prevention’, in Women’s Studies
International Forum: 533-42.
Kippax, Susan & Smith, Gary (2001) ‘Anal intercourse and power in sex between men’,
Sexualities, Vol 4 (4): 413-434.
Kristeva, Julia (1982) The Powers of Horror: An Essay on Abjection, New York and
Chichester: Columbia University Press.
Ladendorf, Martina (2000) ‘PIN-UPS AND GRRLS: The pictures of grrlzines’; paper
presented at the Crossroads in Cultural Studies Conference, 21-25 June 2000,
Birmingham, UK, www.jmk.su.se/digitalborderlands/inas/pinups_grrls.htm, accessed 26
November 2002.
275
Langford, Rachel (2002) ‘What women REALLY WANT’, Brisbane Courier Mail, 19
October: 36.
Lake, Marilyn (1999) Getting Equal: The History of Australian Feminism, St Leonards:
Allen & Unwin.
Leblanc, Lauraine (1999) Pretty in Punk: Girls’ Gender Resistance in a Boys’
Subculture, New Brunswick: Rutgers University Press.
Leonard, W. and Mitchell, A. (2000) The Use of Sexually Explicit Materials in HIV/AIDS
Initiatives Targeted at Gay Men: A Guide for Educators, Australian National Council of
AIDS, Hepatitis C and Related Diseases, Canberra: Commonwealth of Australia.
Levy, Ariel (2005) Female Chauvinist Pigs: Women and the Rise of Raunch Culture,
Melbourne: Schwartz Publishing.
Looby, Christopher (1995) ‘“The Roots of the Orchi, the Iuli of Chestnuts”: The odour of
male solitude’, in P. Bennet & V. Rosario (eds) Solitary Pleasure: The Historical,
Literary, and Artistic Discourses of Autoeroticism, New York, London: Routledge.
Loe, Meika (1999) ‘Feminism for sale: Case study of a pro-sex feminist business’,
Gender & Society, 13(6): 705-732.
Lumby, Catharine (1997a) ‘Nothing personal: Sex, gender and identity in the media age’,
in Jill Julius Matthews (ed) Sex in Public: Australian Sexual Cultures, St Leonards: Allen
& Unwin.
276
Lumby, Catharine (1997b) Bad Girls: The Media, Sex and Feminism in the 90s, St
Leonards: Allen & Unwin.
Lumby, Catharine, (1999) Gotcha: Life in a Tabloid World, St Leonards: Allen & Unwin.
Lumby, C., McCarthy, W. & Albury, K. (2004) Playing By The Rules: On and Off the
Field, Report for the National Rugby League in Player Attitudes and Behaviours Toward
Women, Sydney: University of Sydney.
MacKinnon, Catherine (1994) Only Words, London: Harper Collins.
Marlow, Ann (1999) ‘Moneyshot fever’, Salon Magazine,
www.salon.com/health/sex/1999/04/24/moneyshot/index.html. Accessed 30 April 1999
Matthews, Jill Julius (1985) Good and Mad Women: The Historical Construction of
Femininity in Twentieth-Century Australia Sydney: Allen & Unwin.
Matthews, Jill Julius (1992) ‘The “present moment” in sexual politics’, in R.W. Connell
and G.W. Dowsett (eds) Rethinking Sex: Social Theory and Sexual Theory, Carlton:
Melbourne University Press.
Matthews, Jill Julius (1997) (ed) Sex in Public: Australian Sexual Cultures, St Leonards:
Allen & Unwin.
McCarthy, Wendy (1983) ‘Cleo advisor’, Cleo, July.
277
McGrath, Roberta (1993) Health, Education and Authority: Difference and Deviance in
Harwood V, Oswell, D., Parkinson K , Ward, A (eds) Pleasure Principles: Politics,
Sexuality and Ethics London: Lawrence and Wishart.
McGregor, Fiona (2004) Chemical Palace St Leonards: Allen & Unwin.
McInnes, David, Bollen, Johnathan & Race, Kane (2002) Sexual Learning and
Adventurous Sex, University of Western Sydney, School of Humanities.
McInnes, David (2002) ‘Dignity in indignity: Sex, intimacy and the politics of affect’,
unpublished conference paper, Sex and Society: History, Politics, Intimacy, 1 March,
Australian Centre for Lesbian and Gay Studies, University of Sydney.
McKee, Alan (1997) ‘Penetration and power’, Media International Australia, No 87,
May: 7-18.
McNair, Brian (2002) Striptease Culture: Sex, Media and the Democratisation of Desire,
London: Routledge.
Middleton, Anne-Lise (2002) ‘Being penetrated anally: Erotic inhibitions, improvisations
and transformations’, Sexualities, Vol 5(2): 181-200.
Moore, Suzanne (1988) ‘Here's looking at you, kid!’, in Lorraine Gamman & Margaret
Marshment (eds) The Female Gaze: Women as Viewers of Popular Culture, London: The
Women’s Press.
Morin, Jack (1986) Anal Pleasure and Health, San Francisco: Yes Press.
278
Mulvey, Laura (1975) ‘Visual pleasure and narrative cinema’, Screen, 16:3 (Autumn): 6-
18.
Nagle, Jill (1997) ‘First ladies of feminist porn: A conversation with Candida Royalle and
Debi Sundahl’, in Jill Nagle (ed) Whores and Other Feminists, New York: Routledge.
Naish, John (2005) ‘The hardcore way to safer sex’, The Times Online, 5 October,
www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,8122-1760915,00.html, accessed 19 July 2006.
Nestle, Joan (1983) ‘My Mother Liked To Fuck’ in A. Snitow, C. Stansell and S.
Thompson (eds) Desire: The Politics of Sexuality London: Virago.
Newton, Esther & Walton, Shirley (1992) ‘The misunderstanding: Towards a more
precise sexual vocabulary’, in Carole S Vance (ed) Pleasure and Danger: Exploring
Female Sexuality, London: Pandora.
Nichols, Bill (1991) Representing Reality: Issues and Concepts in Documentary,
Bloomington and Indianapolis: Indiana University Press.
O’Sullivan, Kimberley (1997) ‘Dangerous desire: Lesbianism as sex or politics’, in J.
Matthews (ed) Sex in Public: Australian Sexual Cultures, St Leonards: Allen & Unwin.
O’Sullivan, Kimberly (2002) ‘Good girls gone bad: Lesbians and sex work’, word is out
e-journal, no.3, June, www.wordisout.info.
Osfield, Stephanie (1994) ‘The agony and the ecstasy’, in The Only Safe Sex Guide You’ll
Ever Need, Cleo, December.
279
O’Toole, Laurence (1998) Pornocopia: Porn, Sex and Technology, London: Serpents
Tail.
Pateman, Carol (1988) The Sexual Contract, London: Polity.
Patton, Cindy (1990) Inventing AIDS, New York: Routledge.
Penley, Constance (1997) ‘Crackers and whackers: The white trashing of porn’, in Matt
Wray & Analee Newitz (eds) White Trash: Race and Class in America, London and New
York: Routledge.
Penley, Constance and Ross, Andrew eds. (1991) Technoculture Minneapolis: University
of Minnesota Press
Philpott, Anne (2004) ‘Can safe sex be good sex? Mixing pleasure and prevention’,
Choices, December, Brussels: International Planned Parenthood Foundation.
Plummer, Ken (1995) Telling Sexual Stories: Power, Change and Social Worlds, New
York/London: Routledge.
Probyn, Elspeth (1998) ‘Re: generation: Women’s studies and the disciplining of
Ressentiment’, Australian Feminist Studies, Vol 13, 27: 127-136.
Probyn, Elspeth (2000) Carnal Appetites: Foodsexidentities’, New York: Routledge.
Probyn, Elspeth (2005) Blush: Faces of Shame, Sydney: UNSW Press.
280
Queen, Carol (1995) Exhibitionism For The Shy: Show Off, Dress Up and Talk Hot, San
Francisco: Cleis Press.
Queen, Carol (1997) Real Live Nude Girl: Chronicles of Sex-Positive Culture, San
Francisco: Cleis Press.
Queen, Carol (2001a) ‘Outsider porn comes in’, GoodVibes Newsletter
www.goodvibes.com/cgi-
bin/sgdynamo.exe?HTNAME=magazine/our_regulars/queen_on-line/200102.html,
accessed 15 October 2004.
Queen, Carol (2001b) ‘Yes SIR!: S.I.R. Video’s Shar Rednour and Jackie Strano’
GoodVibes Newsletter, www.goodvibes.com/cgi-
bin/sgdynamo.exe?HTNAME=magazine/features/sex_and_culture/2001041.html,
accessed 15 October 2004.
Ramsdale, David & Dorfman, Ellen (1985) Sexual Energy Ecstasy: A Guide to the
Ultimate Intimate Sexual Experience, Playa Del Ray: Peak Skill Publishing.
Raymond, Janice (1979) The Transsexual Empire Boston: Beacon Press
Rival, Laura, Slater, Don & Miller, Daniel (1998) ‘Sex and sociality: Comparative
ethnographies of sexual objectification’ Theory, Culture and Society, 15(3-4): 294-321.
Rich, Adrienne (1980/1983) ‘Compulsory heterosexuality and lesbian existence’, in A.
Snitow, C. Stansell and S. Thompson (eds) Desire: The Politics of Sexuality London:
Virago.
281
Robinson, Keith (2003) ‘The passion and the pleasure: Foucault’s art of not being
oneself’, Theory Culture and Society, 20(2): 119-144.
Roscoe, Jane (2001) ‘Real entertainment: New factual hybrid television’, Media
International Australia, Incorporating Culture and Policy, No 100, August: 9-20.
Roscoe, Jane & Hight, Craig (2001) Faking It: Mock-documentary and the Subversion of
Factuality, Manchester: Manchester University Press.
Rose, Nikolas (1990) Governing the Soul: Shaping the Private Self, London and New
York: Routledge.
Rubin, Gayle (1987) The leather menace: Comments on politics and S/M’, in Coming to
Power: Writings and Graphics on Lesbian S/M, Samois, Boston: Alyson Press.
Rubin, Gayle (1992) ‘Thinking sex: Notes for a radical theory of the politics of
sexuality’, in Carole S. Vance (ed) Pleasure and Danger: Exploring Female Sexuality,
London: Pandora.
Saywell, Cherise & Pittman, Jeremy (1996) ‘The discourses of HIV and AIDS in
women’s magazines: Feature articles in Australian Cleo and Cosmopolitan’, Australian
Journal of Communication, 23(1): 46-63.
Sedgwick, Eve Kosofsky (1990) Epistemology of the Closet, Berkley: University of
California Press.
Sedgwick, Eve Kosofsky (1994) Tendencies, London: Routledge.
282
Sedgwick, Eve Kosofsky & Frank, Adam (1995) Shame and its Sisters: A Silvan Tomkins
Reader, Duke University Press.
Sedgwick, Eve Kosofsky (2003) Touching Feeling: Affect, Pedagogy, Performativity,
Durham: Duke University Press.
Segal, Lynne (1983) ‘Sensual uncertainty, or why the clitoris is not enough’, in S.
Cartledge & J. Ryan (eds) Sex and Love, New Thoughts on Old Contradictions, London:
The Women’s Press.
Segal, Lynne (1990) Slow Motion: Changing Masculinities, Changing Men, London:
Virago.
Segal, Lynne (1994) Straight Sex: The Politics of Pleasure, London: Virago.
Segal, Lynne (ed) (1997) New Sexual Agendas, London: Macmillan.
Sendziuk, Paul (2003) Learning to Trust: Australian Responses to AIDS, Sydney: UNSW
Press.
Shaviro, Steven (1993) The Cinematic Body, Minneapolis/London: Minnesota University
Press.
Siegel, Carol (2000) New Millennial Sexstyles, Bloomington and Indiana: Indiana
University Press.
Simicevic, Diana (1999) ‘Sex and the city’, Cleo, November.
283
Smart, Carol (1996) ‘Desperately seeking post-heterosexual woman’, in Janet Holland &
Lisa Adkins (eds) Sex, Sensibility and the Gendered Body, London: Macmillan.
Slater, Don (2002) ‘Making things real: Ethics and order on the Internet’, Theory, Culture
and Society, 19(5/6): 227-45.
Slomiak, Mitch (1995) ‘Coping with jealousy on the poly frontier: A personal view’,
Loving More, Vol 1, No 3, Summer.
Smart, Carol (1997) ‘Collusion, collaboration and confession: On moving beyond the
heterosexuality debate’, in Diane Richardson (ed) Theorising Heterosexuality,
Buckingham/Philadelphia: Open University Press.
Snitow, A., Stansell, C, & Thompson, S. (1984) Desire: The Politics of Sexuality,
London: Virago.
Sprinkle, Annie (1998) Post-Porn Modernist: My 25 Years as a Multimedia Whore, San
Francisco: Cleis Press.
Sprinkle, Annie (2001) Hardcore from the Heart, Gabrielle Cody (ed) New York:
Continuum Books.
Stern, Lesley (1992) ‘The body as evidence’ in The Sexual Subject: A Screen Reader in
Sexuality Screen, London: Routledge.
284
Straayner, Chris (1993) ‘The seduction of boundaries: Feminist fluidity in Annie
Sprinkle’s art/education/sex’, in P. Gibson & R. Gibson (eds) Dirty Looks: Women,
Pornography, Power, London: British Film Institute.
Stewart, Fiona J. (1999) ‘Femininities in flux? Young women, heterosexuality and (safe)
sex’ Sexualities, 2(3): 275-90.
Taormino, T. & Green, K. (1997) (eds) Girls’ Guide to Taking Over the World: Writings
From The Girl Zine Revolution, St. Martin’s: Griffin.
Taormino, Tristan (1998) The Ultimate Guide to Anal Sex for Women, San Francisco:
Cleis Press.
Tea, Michelle (2001) ‘The other Oscars’ Nerve Magazine,
www.nerve.com/dispatches/Tea/otherOscars/main.asp, accessed 15 October 2004.
Thomas, Calvin (1996) Male Matter: Masculinity, Anxiety and the Male Body on the
Line, Urbana/Chicago: University of Illinois Press.
Tomkins, Silvan (1995) ‘Shame-Humiliation and Contempt-Disgust’ in Eve Sedgwick
and Adam Frank (eds) Shame and its Sisters: A Sylvan Tomkins Reader,
Durham/London: Duke University Press
Trimberger, Ellen Kay (1983) ‘Feminism, Men, and Modern Love: Greenwich Village,
1900-1925 in A. Snitow, C. Stansell and S. Thompson (eds) Desire: The Politics of
Sexuality London: Virago.
285
Turow, Scott (1999) ‘Something’s up’, Vanity Fair, September.
Van Every, Jo (1995a) ‘Sinking into his arms ... arms in the sink: Heterosexuality and
feminism revisited’, in Lisa Adkins & Vicki Merchant (eds) Sexualising the Social:
Power and the Organisation of Sexuality, London: Macmillan.
Van Every, Jo (1995b) Heterosexual Women Changing the Family: Refusing to Be a
“Wife”! Bristol, PA: Taylor & Francis.
Vance, Carole S. (1992) ‘More danger, more pleasure: A decade after the Barnard
Sexuality Conference’, in Carol S. Vance (ed) Pleasure and Danger: Exploring Female
Sexuality, London: Pandora.
Vanwesenbeeck, Ine (1997) ‘The context of women’s power(lessness) in heterosexual
interactions’, in Lynne Segal (ed) New Sexual Agendas, London: Macmillan.
Veyne, Paul (1993) ‘The final Foucault and his ethics’, Critical Inquiry, 20, Autumn: 2.
Vnuk, Helen (2001) ‘Genital censorship’, Eroticus (3)7.
Waldby, Catherine (1995) ‘Destruction: Boundary erotics and the refiguring of the
heterosexual male’, in Elizabeth Grosz & Elspeth Probyn (eds) Sexy Bodies: The Strange
Carnalities of Feminism, New York and London: Routledge.
Walkowitz, Judith (1983) ‘Male Vice and Female Virtue: Feminism and the Politics of
Prostitution in Nineteenth-Century Britain’ in A. Snitow, C. Stansell and S. Thompson
(eds) Desire: The Politics of Sexuality London: Virago.
286
Wark, McKenzie (1999) Celebrities, Culture and Cyberspace: The Light on the Hill in a
Postmodern World, Annandale: Pluto Press.
Warner, Michael (ed) (1993) Fear of a Queer Planet: Queer Politics and Social Theory,
Minneapolis: University of Minnesota Press.
Warner, Michael (1999) The Trouble with Normal, Cambridge: Harvard University Press.
Warner, Michael (2002) Publics and Counter-Publics, New York: Zone Books.
Watney, Simon (1987) Policing Desire: Pornography, AIDS and the Media, London:
Methuen.
Waugh, Thomas (1996) Hard to Imagine: Gay Male Eroticism in Photography and Film
from Their Beginnings to Stonewall, New York: Colombia University Press.
Weeks, Jeffreys (1995) Invented Moralities: Sexual Values in an Age of Uncertainty,
New York: Columbia University Press.
Weeks, Jeffreys (2000) Making Sexual History, Cambridge: Polity Press.
Weiss, Allen S. (1989) ‘A new history of the passions’, October, 49: 102-112.
West, Celeste (1997) Lesbian Polyfidelity San Francisco: Booklegger Press.
Williams, Linda (1989) Hard Core: Pleasure, Power and ‘The Frenzy of the Visible’,
Berkeley/Los Angeles: University of California.
287
Williams, Linda (1993) ‘A provoking agent: The pornography and performance art of
Annie Sprinkle’, in P.C. Gibson & R. Gibson (eds) Dirty Looks: Women, Pornography,
Power, London: British Film Institute.
Williams, Linda (ed) (2004) Porn Studies, Durham: Duke University Press.
Willis, Ellen (1983) ‘Feminism, moralism and pornography’, in A. Snitow, C. Stansell
and S. Thompson (eds) Desire: The Politics of Sexuality London: Virago.
Willis, Ellen (1992) No More Nice Girls: Countercultural Essays, Hanover and London:
Wesleyan University Press.
Wilton, Tamsin (1996) ‘Which one’s the man? The heterosexualisation of lesbian sex’, in
Diane Richardson (ed) Theorising Heterosexuality, Buckingham/Philadelphia: Open
University Press.
Wilkinson, Lisa (1995) ‘This Month’, Cleo, July.
Wilson, Elizabeth (1983) ‘I’ll Climb the Stairway to Heaven: Lesbianism in the
Seventies’ in S. Cartledge and J. Ryan (eds) Sex & Love: new thoughts on old
contradictions London: The Women’s Press.
Winship, Janice (1987) Inside Women’s Magazines London: Pandora Press.
Wolf, Naomi (1997) Promiscuities: A Secret History of Female Desire, London: Chatto
and Windus.